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Asalamu aleikum, I had just recently adopted Twelver Shi’ism about a week ago from being a practicing Sunni (Hanafi) Muslim. As of right now, I’m currently doubting myself on everything revolving the maintenance of my faith. My parents are Bangladeshi immigrants who are Traditional Hanafis and I frequently go to family gatherings with other Bengali Sunni Muslims who frequently congregate for Salat. I also had just recently graduated from University where I met a lot of great Sunni Muslims who I still interact with today and my Muslim friends are all Sunni. For some perspective about my family, my dad one time saw me praying in sadl position three years ago when I was studying the Maliki school of thought at the time and immediately confronted me after I prayed because “we are a Sunni family, not Shi’a”. Even though I simply corrected him in stating that I was praying in a valid position under one of the mainstream Sunni schools of thought. He still didn’t budge because he didn’t even know what I was talking about (he just blindly follows what other Bengali Hanafis do and he’s not even informed what a madhab even is lol) and so I went back to being Hanafi to avoid any strained relationship. My mom seems to not really care about Shi’as and she prefers unity over communal division. My sister is a “cultural Sunni” who’s agnostic but views Shi’ism as weird. My dad has always forced me to pray at our local Sunni mosque for every Isha and still does (doesn’t bother me anymore since I returned to Islam four years ago but this previous cultural coercion led to my nihilistic atheism phase in my teens). Due to my very Sunni-centric environment, I’m constantly forcefully doubting my Twelver beliefs just to fit back into my normal life. However, I know it’s theologically absurd to change my beliefs on this issue alone but I really do feel some of my Sunni peers will view me as “less Muslim” if I came out as Shi’a. It feels so “two-faced” whenever I’m praying in congregation with Sunnis when I’m intentionally praying alone (my marja is al-Sistani btw). I also love frequenting several mosques in my area for daily prayers and meeting fellow brothers to connect with. There’s only one Shi’a mosque near me that does active programs but doesn’t open up for daily Salah (the main aspect I really miss). The Shi’a mosque is also just packed with frequented Pakistani uncles that I don’t relate with but there are more younger people who show up for Majlis events. This might sound obscure but it honestly does feel like I converted to a different religion on the way I have to attend a certain mosque and hold dissident theological views from my Sunni counterparts.The mourning ritual is what I’m still getting used to and sometimes I just get the constant thoughts in my head, “this is not real Islam”. Despite all of this, my beliefs are still aligned with Twelver Shi’ism but man do I wish I never went down this rabbit hole of searching for deeper truth…

Salams, Everyone. Hey guys, how have you all been? So, it's been two weeks since I became Shia(I was a Naqshbandi Sunni before), and boy has it been spiritually rewarding. Today, however, I had to resort to something that I had hoped to avoid. Nevertheless, it has helped me understand the troubles faced by the Shia communities elsewhere. If you've had similar taqiyyah experiences, please share them. I belong to the elite of Bangladesh, and therefore have rarely experienced real fear. I attend Jum'a at the local mosque--which as you might've guessed is Sunni--and prayed nafila of dhur while others prayed salat'al jum'a. Now, I already knew that praying according to the Jafari method was going to draw attention, but I didn't think much of it. I used to pray like the malikis before, and people never bugged me at all. Today, however was different. After I finished Dhuhur-'Asr--before I even had time to breathe--an entire herd of madrassah students in their twenties surrounded me. This alone scared me, for indeed, attracting an alim's attention was akin to being called a heretic--or even worse in the Shia's case, a kafir. These young men unleashed a barrage of questions in my direction. My initial response ,of course, was to simply identify myself as a maliki. That wasn't enough for them. They went on to ask me the intricacies of Maliki Fiqh. It was a bit difficult making up genuine lies on the spot, especially lying about why "Malikis" prostrate on a small piece of wood( i don't have a mohr). Throughout the exchange, however, I was genuinely afraid. All it would take for them to know I'm a rafidha, was to spot a chink in my armor of lies. I knew about the financial background of these madrassah students(it's a sorrowful tale for the most part) and have witnessed for myself that they can resort to violent zealotry to feel good about themselves. Mentally, I kept asking Alllah(swt) to grant me Imam Ali's courage. Thankfully, they believed me and in turn gave me an entire lecture on the Hanafi fiqh. After I mentally heaved a huge sigh of relief, I decided to milk a little a information out of them. Plastering a dumb expression on my face, I asked them about this Masjid's attitude towards Sufism, Wahabism and the Deobandi school I'd heard so much about. They took a midway stance between sufism and wahabism, saying that there have been genuine saints(haqqani pirs) but most of them are charlatans. They even went on to say that Muhammad ibn Abdul Wahhab wasn't too bad of a person(subhanAllah!). They promptly informed me that this masjid( which is also an Islamic research centre) was Deobandi. Images of the Taliban flashed through my mind. We went on to talk about Bissho Iztema--the second largest congregation of Muslims in the world(after Hajj)--which takes place twice every year in Bangladesh. I tactfully asked if the Shia attend it. One of them sniffed and said, "Naaaaaaaa, Shia ra toh Kafir!" which translates to "Noooooooo waaaaay, those Shias are kafirs!". I giggled mentally and soon realized that this masjid was a breeding ground for sunni extremism. They also believed that all Shias share the same belief as the Ghorabiyyah(that Jibreel made a mistake). As the conversation neared its end, one of them grew attached to me. He insisted on giving me an entire tour of the Madrassah(it's a pretty big place) and I complied. He asked me to have lunch with him, but I politely refused. This man, had he known my true aqeeda, would have unleashed a mob of zealots on me. Of that, I have no doubt. Anyways, practicing taqiyyah for the first time actually allowed me to see the wisdom behind Imam Jafar as-Sadiq's(a.s) statement: Taqiyyah is 9/10 of the religion. I also acquired useful information about the masjid and its alims. When I told my mum about this incident, she nearly had a fit. Again she mocked me for leaving sunnism, and asked me to start praying like hanafis again. I've given up on my parents entirely--they want to follow the fatwas of Lady Fatima Zahra's(a.s.) killer, they're free to do so. I only wish to serve my Imams. For now, I'll bare the brunt of their insults and mockery. Please pray so that I have the strength to go through social hardships that are part-and-parcel of being Shia. Also, what should i do if I fear physical harassment on Jum'a day, ie if I pray like a Jafari? And am I obligated to obey my parents regarding something that is OK in sunni law but is prohibited by the scholars of the School of Ahlul Bayt? If I have offended anyone, I apologize. That was not my intention. If you've ever been through something similar, please share them here. la fata illa 'Ali wa la saif illa Dhulfiqar.