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I am human, I make mistakes, therefore please correct my reasoning with references if possible, as I have separated from my partner over the matter of "displaying one's beauty", and perhaps I am wrong in my thought process. In the situation of a woman who does not observe hijab, but covers her body well; My reasoning: it is wrong to post your photos on social media where men are able to view your photo. Allah says in the quran do not display your beauty. You are a woman with beauty, you are posting a photo on social media, you are displaying yourself on social media, by posting on social media, it is an act of displaying yourself. I don't know how else I can say it. It is not the same as going to work. The thought here is "I am going to work". It is not the same as walking down the street to get somewhere and people see you, because the thought is "I am going to x place". When you post a photo, the thought is "I will post a picture of myself on instagram " in other words "I will display myself on instagram". You are therefore unnecessarily displaying your beauty to men. Even if the woman observes proper hijab, it is an act of "I will display myself on the internet by posting this photo"; it isn't a charity photo, a conference video, you giving a lecture, it's simply to share a "fun" or "precious" or "happy" moment with the people on social media (which includes male cousins, friends, strangers, etc.). Am I wrong in my thinking? Can someone explain it in a more articulate way rather than my caveman explanation?
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(bismillah) (salaam) I was hoping to get some advice on the topic of social hijab. I live in the UK. Before I explain my dilemma, I follow Sayed Sistani and I will give a brief summary of his rulings on this: 1. There is nothing wrong with talking to na-mahram out of necessity e.g. talking about work with opposite gender work colleagues, opposite gender doctors, cashiers, etc etc. 2. It is makruh to talk to na-mahram where its not necessary e.g. general chit chat with the opposite gender, laughing and joking with them, going out to cinema/restaurants with them 3. It is haram to talk to na-mahram to make them feel lust or if they make you feel lust or fall into any other type of sin. I work in a department of eight people, 6 are female and 3, including me, are male. This is how the seating plan is at work: male female female ------------------------------------------- (desks) female me female female female As you can see I sit in the centre amongst all female colleagues. We are all of similar age so like females of similar age they have become good friends and they talk about various things such as what they did on the weekend, their dating lives and so on. As you can see from the desk plan, I am in the middle of these conversations and can hear everything. The good thing is that they don't talk about anything inappropriate such as women stuff or backbiting and they are good people in that sense - just general stuff. My dilemma is that due to where I sit, I find myself getting drawn into the conversations with them that leads to joking around and laughter so something makruh under the marja that I follow and this is poking at my conscious and I am not sure what to do. I have tried different things such as I put on headphones and listen to lectures, nohas about ahlulbayt etc. so I can't hear what they say but also gives the impression I am busy and don't want to be disturbed and I even went through a phase where I kept my conversations strictly about work which worked but they thought something was wrong with me (lol). What do you guys think? A part of me feels we are social beings and what I am doing is normal. I don't hang out with them outside work hours. Other part of me is obviously aware of the rulings. I can keep my headphones in but all the time? Can I really expect myself to talk to them about nothing but work for the 8 hours or so I am at work? Also, are these general conversations necessary and fall under 1. in the marja rulings, in the sense that socialising is something necessary at work and harbours a healthy working relationship, meaning if I didn't do that, I would alienate myself. The good things is that I have established certain Islamic boundaries: - They accommodate my prayers and let me pray at work - Most of the females in my team are aware that contact with me it not allowed. Bless them, even when they accidentally tap my shoulder to get my attention or accidentally touch me in any way, they apologise! - They are happy with me not attending social events/work events where alcohol will be on the table I am sitting on Sorry this post is a bit unstructured, but given all the above, what do you guys think? I am leaning towards limiting it as much as possible so use the headphones (if you guys have other ideas and ways of limiting it let me know) and I even work home one a day a week which is helpful and generally try my best to uphold my marjas ruling. Some things I can definitely do is for example, not participate in work whatsapp convos etc ( we have two work whatsapp groups) cos thats not necessary and in my control, which I will look to stop. Other things I can't avoid e.g. next week I am travelling by car to a work meeting away from the office with a colleague so she will be in my car with me (just us two). I imagine this is makruh (being alone with na mahram) so is it possible to just talk about work and avoid general convo in an hour long journey? so I guess I should have just not offered her a lift and let her take the train? (its a fair distance to travel) but then would I come across rude and not courteous? Any advice appreciated Thanks, duas.- 16 replies
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- social hijab
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Fascinating video about the statistics of attraction between the two sexes, with some rather interesting conclusions. He does, however, not consider the impact factors not relating to attraction have on divorce, relegating the phenomenon entirely to each sex's perception of the other's attractiveness. He also assumes that women's perception of their own attractiveness is the same as men's perception of it (which is the source of the data) when commenting on women 'settling'. Either way, quite an amusing watch!
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Islam's ruling on hair systems/pieces / extensions
iamheretoask posted a topic in Jurisprudence/Laws
Aslamualaikum, i have tried my best to find an exact ruling about using hair systems for men who have lost their hair in a young age but i am unable to get a satisfactory and logical answer , now i heard and read that it is prohibited to use human hair extensions or wigs or toupees to be exact and it is ok to use the ones which are made of artificial hairs, i did not get that, i mean first of all the purpose i conquered behind forbidding the use of hair pieces or wigs is so that they can be used as a mean of deception but the case is totally different when a person has a real reason to wear toupees if he or she has lost his or her hair in a young age so guys help me out in clearing that confusion , can a person wear human hair made toupee or he is only allowed to wear the artificial ones, the Hadith upon which the ruling of not using human hair extensions is based describes pretty clearly that a girl lost her hair due to some disease and her mother wanted to use hair extensions on her ( hair from another person ) and Rasulallah (s.a.w.w) forbade her from doing so. so if human hairs are not allowed neither should be the artficial ones becuz they're pretty much the same in looks, only because they were not there at the time of Rasulullah (s.a.w.w) doesn't justifies them to be used. the Hadith i quoted i read from and heard of Ahl-usunnah's book, i want to know what is shia mazhab's take on this issue as inspite of trying my best i was unable to find the shia mazhab's take on this topic, another thing i wanna ask about is if the toupees are allowed then what is the ruling of performing ghusl / wudu wearing them as they are mostly attached to the scalp for a certain period of time and they are fixed for that particular time ( a couple of weeks or months etc), so does one require to remove them every time he is to perform ghusl or wudu( which is a difficult and painful task) or he can perform wudu and ghusl while wearing them and as they are attached with adhesives so there is a possibility that water would not go through such adhesives , by the way they say that these adhesives let water go through them but still what if it doesn't go through, will the ghusl and wudu be still valid ? i'll also translate this query briefly in urdu so that more users can review and answer that, kya hair replacement units / wigs lagana jayez hai ? kya insani balon wali wig istemal ki ja skti hai ? humaray han aksar logon k jawani mein sar k baal gir jatay hain aur muashra bhi esa hai humara k mazaq banaya jata hai to kya confidence restore krne k liye wig use ki ja skti hai aur kya ye wig insani balon se bani hui ho to bhi jayez hai ya k sirf artificial balon wali jayez hai ?aur agar esi toupees / wigs use krna jayez hai to ye zyada tar fix kr k lagai jati hain sarr pr ek khas time period k liye to us time period k douran wudu aur ghusl k kya ehkaam houngy ? kya har baar wigs ko utara jayega jo k kafi painful process hai ya k un k pehnay huye hee ghusl aur wudu anjaam dia ja skta hai is haal mein k ho skta hai k sar k kisi hisay tk pani touch na ho raha hou , please reply. JazakAllah -
I was sleeping during fast. unintentional Ihtilam happened during sleep, is my fast invalid?
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Salam, I was hoping to get some advice from the men out there who are attending university or work for long durations in the day. I am currently at university, for majority of the day (maybe 8 to 10 hours), which requires me to use the toilet (allot). However, they are public toilets and are usually quite dirty, so I usually urinate while standing up for convenience and cleanliness. Obviously, that is not permitted, and it's preventing me from performing prayer during the day, so I usually have to combine them when I reach home. Is there a solution to this? Keep in mind that cleaning the seat with water and toilet paper takes about 5 to 10 minutes which is largely impractical when you go to the toilet more than 6 to 8 times a day. Also, the closest most is a 5 minute walk so it is also a huge inconvenience to walk there every time. Please let me know if you've overcome this issue. Jazakum Allah Khear
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I was just addicted to masturbation. After getting rid of it, by mistake i masturbated yesterday. My question is: after doing this i wore clean clothes...without ghusl...so after ghusl can i wear the same clothes or the clothes are pak.???
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Salam everyone I have a question on the status of women in shia islam (Shia Ahadith books and Ahlulbayt books), I have heard some narrations related to Imam Ali that he said that women are dumb or something like that which I think he would never say. And there was a whole book which really degraded the women by using some ahadith of Imam Ali (a.s) like a girl should not raise her voice on his husband and should never object him. HAVE ANYONE OF YOU HEARD OF THIS, WHAT IS THE AUTHENTICITY OF THESE AHADITHS/ NARRATIONS ?
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I would like to know what should a Muslimah found homosexual text messages in her husband phone ,and she also found out that he engaged in homosexual activity .Do she confront him or should she talk to some one at the masjid about it? Or keep praying to Allah that he stop engaging in these Actives? Or ask Allah to forgive him for his sins and hope the marriage change
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SALAM!! In Quran it is said for men to provide food and clothing to your wife. For wives it is guided to always keep happy your husband and obey what he says to except for Haram. But what about giving love to your wives. Here by love I don't mean (intercourse), I mean to always make her feel that her husband is loyal to her and is very happy to have her. Is there any thing said in Quran to always love your wife other than just fulfilling her material needs?
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Fill this form I have to conduct a psychology research for my final exams. I need Orthodox religious people who follow traditional roles to fill up this form. It only takes about 5- 10 minutes at most. Be honest and answer the test according to how you really behave and what you believe in. Your identity isn't recorded so you can be sure nobody knows what you have answered. it is confidential. Thanks.
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Is It Permissible For A Man To Wear Earrings?
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Salam, I'm just wondering what the fatwa from Ayatullah Khamenei is regarding plucking ones eyebrows, I can't seem to find anything online. (By plucking I mean the stray hairs around and in between the eyebrows.) Jazarkallah.
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Salaam alaikum brothers and sisters! I had a question regarding the reasoning behind women standing behind men in prayers (for both married couples and in congregations). I am currently conducting research regarding the Symbolism of Salat for my symbolism class in the university. I was wondering the reasoning behind this positioning. I know from a logical standpoint it makes complete sense (I would never want to do sujood in front of man) but I want to know what is the Islamic reasoning. If possible include hadiths or any other form of justification. My professor is interested in the reasoning so I would like some evidence to support this. I wasn't sure if there are jurisdiction regarding this or hadiths. Thank you! Salaam -
Salaam alaikum ! (again) I have a recently converted friend, Al hamduillah, who has found Islam, and has been converted for a little over a month or so. She is a "feminist" who advocates for the equality of all and for women to choose their roles regardless of their gender. Therefore, I was recently speaking to her in a group chat with other sisters in which we were discussing how our husbands (she is unmarried) have domain over the majority of the affairs, and we were just talking about whether or not or husbands can decide how to dress. Needless to say she privately messaged me and said that she does not necessarily agree with that (men being the protectors and maintainers of their wives) and I found myself in a difficult discussion because while I believe we are asked by Allah swt to follow the roles He has established for us, I did not want to turn her away from Islam (because she is a pretty staunch feminist). So I was wondering if there was any way to appropriately tell her (I mean it is in the Quran after all) and I was also just wondering if she is permitted to not follow the prescribed gender roles. I know Allah swt has profound knowledge regarding His creations and so naturally He had given us roles which are naturally and easy for us to follow, and which provide a sound framework for life; however, I do not want her to think Islam is a religion in which women are oppressed by their husbands. Is a woman permitted to not prescribe to her mandated roles, or if she does not, will there be consequences? Both brothers and sisters are welcome to answer Thank you and salaam (:
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I started wearing hijab seven days ago and I have been getting more male attention than usual when away from my husband, and I don't know what to do. Naturally my husband is unhappy with the attention, and I'm concerned too. He thinks maybe I'm not conducting myself properly but my hair isn't showing, my arms aren't showing, my legs aren't showing, my neck isn't showing, I'm not wearing makeup, I'm not cussing, I'm not being obnoxious, and I'm not engaging strangers. I keep to myself when I'm by myself, and if anything my eyes are usually on my phone. I'm thinking about taking the scarf off and just dressing modestly, if its just going to get me all this attention. I dont know. Maybe I'm just not ready. Does anyone have any advice? Please help. This is really upsetting to me.
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(bismillah) Okay, I've been noticing a couple of things that have become quite common in the Muslim Community--in the East and the West. One makes me laugh because it's just super funny, and the other really grinds my gears. Let's start with something lighthearted. Ever been to the mall and suddenly this absolutely stunning woman just walks past you? She has enough perfume to asphyxiate a Komodo Dragon to death, her clothes makes Britney Spears look modest, the amount of make up on her face just makes you uncomfortable and her hair couldn't be more exposed. Yeah, that's happened to all of us but here's the ironic bit. Her parents are following her around--her mother is covered head to toe in a niqab and her father is wearing a long thobe with an imamah to top it all of. Both of them have an expression of such pride on their faces, as if the contrast between their modesty and their daughter's immodesty was a good thing. It's sort of sad, but it's also worth a chuckle. Now the part that's not so funny. Whenever I travel abroad and hit the beach, I sometimes see hijabis wearing the most uncomfortable clothes to protect their modesty(My Allah bless them) and then their husbands pop up wearing these super small shorts and super tight T-shirts. I mean seriously, what's that about? I always wear full pants, and loose T-shirts(it's not that bad, trust me) so I'm not being a hypocrite here. What annoys me is that it's okay for these men to boss their wives around and make them wear layer upon layer of black clothing in the middle of June and force them on to the beach and they themselves dress so immodestly. So woman must be perfectly Islamic but man can just put on his shorts and play volleyball in public because he is a man? I know Islam prohibits this kind of immodest behavior but many of us don't pay attention to these types of situations. Has this ever caught your attention? Does it bother you? How would you recommend going about remedying this problem? Salam. Shahreem.
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I am interested in knowing how women manipulate men, I can imagine how but I don't exactly know the method by which a women would/could manipulate a man and also how often do women try to use their gender specific ability to manipulate men? and How can a man be wary of this, what are the signs when a women tries to manipulate someone?
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I have read on Al-Islam that men cannot approach their wife naked, I think its makruh. Can you explain why this is? thank you -
This black guy was laying his hands on the shoulders of this Muslim women. I saw this after we all got out of the lecture theatre, I don't think the black guy knows that Muslim women don't like being touched by non mahram, especially by non Muslims, or I assume they don't. What are my obligations according to Islamic law? do I talk to any of them or just leave them alone?
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I am not an expert on beauty things, as I considered men who looked after themselves as "gay" when I was a kid, now I have had a change of mind and would like to take care of myself better. However I do not know how to do this. I have searched the internet for different solutions, but couldn't find satisfying results. I also don't know anything about beauty products, so need you brothers and sisters to help. So please don't tell me to contact my marja. I live in the UK btw, this is relevant when it comes to products. I will start with hair: Recommend to me a good shampoo and conditioner to stick with. I also have grey hairs, my hair is losing its darkness, what can I do? Skin: parts of my skin such as the finger joints, neck and armpit and around the eyes are darker compared to the rest of my body's skin, how can I make these areas lighter and the same as the rest of my body? I have heard of this skin peeling thing, so please recommend to me a skin peeling product which you use. Beard: It is growing in a very annoying way, under my chin, and there grows very little hair on my cheeks. Making my beard look repulsive rather than attractive. Under Islamic Law how serious is it to shave your beard? I am thinking of shaving it a few times in order to make it grow on my cheek and grow thicker. Perfumes/cologne: I have a terrible sense of smell, I went to buy a cologne and they all smelt like spices to me, did not pick a difference between any of them. I prefer something which smells of roses, I like that smell it is very nice. Also could you recommend a cologne which is a little stronger as I don't get close to people, I keep my distance when around them but I still want the smell to reach those around me, without hurting their noses. I was also fat and short a few years ago, that left ripples on my skin because the skin is stretched, however I am not so fat now but the ripples are still there and they are not disappearing, help with this? Thank you
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This is from me, as a man I know men (generally) more than women: just to point out to sisters what men are like and how covering yourself helps: - as a guy I have realized and I have seen other people do this: - if a man sees a women who wearing Islamic clothing, they stay away, this is good for you because most guys who approach girls has the 'final act' in his mind. - wearing a hijab is like filtering the good from the bad, bad men approach girls who are revealing themselves because they are attracted to what their eyes see. good men, however, don't approach women to hit on them, they usually have something to say. - Not a single man will ever approach women with an honorable intention if he hasn't got some business. If you have parents then they are your gateway to marriage, only a good man will ask for your hand from your parents, and they are the ones you can usually trust, but only if he is proposing out his own choice. - It is satans habit to tempt people, thus an evil man is he who approaches you and tempts you to accept his request, he will first look to convince you and then ask for your parents permission. In this way he hopes to use you against your parents, if you accept and your parents refuse, can you see the damage done here? thus a good man is what you seek for marriage, the good man is he who will ask your parents first and then you. - this is because, a young girl can easily be deceived (So easy) even if they think they are smart, and cunning. parents however, especially the father, recognizes the mans worth and so he cannot be deceived. -also an honorable man will firstly go to the father in order to see if the parents like him and if he is 'husband material'. So protect your dignity by covering your body and hiding your figure, you don't need to show it because men (non-mahram) don't need to see it. - if you only knew what a man imagines when he stares at the flesh of young girls, when he sees their figure, how he yearns to jump on her then you would realize how filthy most men are and you would not walk among them out of disgust. - cover yourself and don't give them the pleasure of imaging sinful acts with you. - cover yourself and keep yourself clean from the lustful staring of men. - cover yourself and add value to yourself - cover yourself and show that you are more than just a piece of walking flesh for men. May Allah make you strong in your defense and know that satan lays ambush only on the straight path, all other paths are already his and he needs no effort to make stray those who are already lost, and those who are not on the straight path are an influence for satan against those on the right path.
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I am going to visit my parents in America in a month or so, and I am newly religious. I live in Lebanon, and I have gotten use to not shaking hands with men since I put my scarf on in 2009. My husband is also moderatly religious as I am. We are so worried about whats going to happen when we go to America and we dont shake hands with men/women. How am I suppose to explain my stance? Without them thinking I am an extemist maniac? My dad is Sunni & doesnt really support some of my religious boundries. If there is anyone out there with this problem, please enlighten me on how you act when an old friend comes charging at you with a hug when you havent seen them for 3 years. Or when you are almosted forced to shake someones hand! Like what do we do!
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why is it not wajib for Men,in Islam, to put on hijab,whilst it is wajib for Women to do so?? is it that women are more attractive than men by nature??>>not true,makes no sense is it because men are more into s** and that stuff ...and women have more control over that desire?>>>makes no sense is it for no reason?>>... please,can anyone convince me of the reason behind that...(why men don't have to put a veil and cover their bodies?) thanks in advance..
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Are Tungsten rings for men halal or haram? Jazakallah Khairan for your answers! (wasalam)
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