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In the Name of God بسم الله
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Asalamalekum, Currently i am living away from my wife due to her visa issues, and involved in long distance relationship. We speak with each other on skype and phone, my problem is of that of all men who are facing similar issue like men. I fail to control my urges, once i chat with my wife and masturbate. When i wasn't married, i would control myself long periods of time and not masturbate, but after marriage it is even harder. Because i am chatting with my wife and the urges naturally kicks in. I understand that for a bachelor it is haram to masturbate because he would imagine other women to masturbate to. But i simply don't understand the logic behind, even if a man thinks of his wife in extreme circumstances and masturbate? In quran it is mention, "we should guard our private parts except from our spouse" but it doesn't clearly says a lot into masturbation when a man is thinking of his wife?
Hello. I need some advice in dealing with long distance relationship with my wife. The thing is that, currently i am waiting for my wife visa approval. During this time we talk on phone for hours, which i have no problem with, because my job allows me to speak to my wife when i am there. The problem arises, when i am off two days and at home. During this time i feel like getting intimate with her, and i want a release my desires through masturbation. Which is haram act, and i feel guilty afterwards, so should i make a excuse, so i dont speak to her those two days? Thank You.
Salmaalekum, I would like to know why can't a fatwa be passed specially for youths living in the west. So it can help ease and alleviate the suffering, and guilt that is attached to masturbating? Millions of young man and woman who can't get married at a young age for various reasons specially "education", are indulge in this act not by choice, but it is inescapable for young healthy adult to shut off his/her desire completely until marriage. Or control it by fasting etc. for a long period of time! My story I have tried every tactics there are in the book in order to stop masturbation. And when i say i "tried" let me tell you, i have been through hell! So, it has been now 2 years since i have been fighting this battle, first let me tell you how i was before, when i did not touch upon this topic. "Peace of mind, high confidence, stress free, positive feelings, loved life, studying, going to college, going out, meeting people, going to mosque, etc. Were some of the things i used to do, before i tried stopping masturbation. And now let me tell you what has happened to me while i tried to stop masturbating after i contacted marja/ ayatollah; SEVERELY DEPRESSED FOR TWO YEARS, ANXIETY, STRESS, CONSTANT FEELING OF GUILT, SUICIDAL THOUGHTS, DON'T LIKE TO PRAY, STOP GOING OUT AND SPEAKING TO ANYONE, NERVOUSNESS, QUIT COLLEGE etc. I know that it is my fault, that i went so deeper into this topic in order to stop masturbation . But it was only to please Allah and remove that burden off my chest, but i still failed. Plus getting the advice from marja did not help my suffering, as it just kept pushing me deeper in to the hole i was already in. Lastly, i would like to know what you guys opinion on this subject, i know that i am not the only one who has been consumed by this matter. And i did many researched and found out many such stories like mine. Where the youth had gone far as trying to end his life, from the suffering. At the moment i have just accepted my self, which has given me confidence, and peace of mind! Ali
(salam) I have been involved in a long distance relationship with my wife and my spouce is in another country, realistically for the foreseable future, although I am trying to make some sort of arrangments where we can live together but will probably take around a year to achieve this. In the meantime it is very difficult to control desires and rather than do mutah or take a second wife which is not really realistic, there is no means to satisfy our mutual desires. I have emailed marja/scholars with no responses and it is something which you cant really ask local shayks because it is quite intimate and private. So there is a few scenarios or questions which come to mind and i am sure there is many people who have similair questions. Is looking at pictures of ones wife and masturbating to the pictures permissable, with her permission? Is Phone sex, or talking intimately over the phone while masturbating allowed? Is online sex through the use of a webcam or chatting program permissable? It is not viable for me to visit my wife every couple of months, so while we are away what would be the best way to deal with our desires. here is a fatwa i found online for a similair query: ps please dont delete, this is a serious issue for me and im sure others, postive feedback would be good.
Asalam alaikum was rahmat Allah wa barakatu. Hi everyone, I am sorry to ask an awkward question on a public forum, but I am a new muslimah and would really appreciate any information! My husband likes one of us to always be wearing some article of clothing (normally it's socks) when we are intimate. He says that it will keep shaitan from reaching our child if I were to become pregnant. I have tried googling this and have found opinions of scholars that say that there is no reason for couples to have to wear clothing during intercourse. However, these are all Sunni resources and my husband is Shia. Is there a different opinion in the school of ahl albayt? Furthermore, he also told me that water can count as a cover, so it is permissible to be intimate in the shower without clothing. Once again, can anyone direct me to information about this? Either way, I will respect my husband's wishes as I love him and want to be a good wife, but I would just like to know. Thank you very much!
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