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In the Name of God بسم الله
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Hello brothers and sisters. I feel like I am in dire need of help. My hatred and the feeling of jealously towards my relatives and slowly now, towards others are increasing. I have lived a lonely difficult life, where I wasn't allowed to communicate with others much. Wasn't allowed to go out much. Basically say at home alone most of the time. I watch my cousins get everything they want. I'm not jealous over this but, the fact they travel a lot. Something I've never done. I wish to go to hajj and I wish to go to Iraq especially, so I can meet my grandfather. My grandmother passed away, so I never had a chance to meet her. I had a chance to go to Iraq this year, excited to meet my grandfather. I was meant to go with my relatives, but they had secretly planned everything, excluding me out. Which made me sad, as I know they are not fans of Iraq, where as I love the beauty and the history of Iraq. Even though I've never been, I know in my heart that its a unique place. My one chance is gone, I'm afraid I've lost my chance to meet my grandfather as I heard he is sick. I can't go unless for another five years. Which breaks my heart, and now I have tried to push away these negative feelings I've had for them. But now its just, worse. I can't help but think bad thoughts. I just don't want my heart to turn dark, as I've retreated myself from communication towards others and stopped caring for everyone as I'm continuously being betrayed occasionally. I don't really have anyone a around me to teach me or help me Islamically. I'm trying hard to be patient and humble and forgiving and kind. I'm losing that side of me. But I'm so alone. I'm reading the Quran and hadith's, but I'm not sure as to what I should be reading. There are other things before that triggered all of this, but I'll end up writing a book on here. I would appreciate anything. Please and thank you.
I am 17 now, and I am a brother, and I often hold grudges over little things, and even pray for people's deaths when they wrong me.....for instance, a 9th grader girl in my school told me she couldn't sit next to me because she was moving this weekend and it was her last day at the school....but sure enough, the next week i found her in the library and confronted her.......i tried apologizing, but she wouldn't accept my apology....so one morning, i decided to stare at her through her classroom window....a teacher's assistant came and yelled at me and threatened to take action if I did this again......i prayed for both their deaths, and told my parapro, who then deducted points from my behavioral point sheet....i ended up dropping a level, making it harder for me to leave alternative school by the end of this year and go to turkey in 15 months like my dad promised me he would if i was in regular ed for a whole year.....i also referred to the teacher (not the assistant) as a "state sponsor of terrorism" (and inside joke i have is referring to people as nations....pls help me i swear im not trolling) A gigantic 12th grade boy was bullying this girl by tapping her ipad which she uses for school, she told him to stop, but he wouldn't. so i told on him, and i told him i told on him, and he said, "and you wonder why you have no friends...." (I have autism)...i prayed for his death.... also, another 12th grader was picking on the same girl, by closing her ipad, so i told on him and he got in big trouble.........he then called me a snitch.....i prayed for his death, and rejoiced in my victory over him....... i also pray for fox news anchors' death and pamela geller's death..... is this haram? i know praying for tyrants' deaths is halal, but what about smaller evils? and how do I get over grudges?
(salam) I recently joined a website Ummah.com. But I was sad to see that it was just like Sunni Forum. The same hatred. The same violence. The same offensive attitude towards Shia Muslims. When somebody asked me questions about temporary marriage and I answered him, people began to ask dirty questions. I was very grieved. Is this what Islam teach us? Islam teaches us to keep ourselves in our limits and don't cross moral values. Alas! People claim to be believers but act like disbelievers. Well, I'm there with the name Muslim Modesty.
ÈÓã Çááå ÇáÑÍãä ÇáÑÍíã My brother and sisters in faith and creation, ÇáÓáÇã Úáíßã The hatred of Amir al-Mu'minin 'Ali ibn Abi Talib (as) and his followers is something notorious. The curious amongst us has asked about this matter and answers has been provided. In a few words, it is due to the corrupt narration intervened in the Sunni narrations by Jewish 'scholars*'. Allah says: 'Surely You will find the most hostile of all people towards the faithful to be the Jews and the polytheists...' - [al-Ma'idah, 5:82] Note: The faithful refers to Amir al-Mu'minin and his followers. Nevertheless, I am going to specify this topic about the ablution of the Sunni's and the Jews, especially those who prevailed at the time of Solomon (as). 'And to David We gave Solomon -- what an excellent servant! Indeed he was a penitent [soul]. When one evening there were displayed before him prancing steeds, he said, 'Indeed I have preferred the love of [worldly] niceties to the remembrance of my Lord until [the sun] disappeared behind the [night's] veil.' Bring it1 back for me!' Then he [and the others] began to stroke their legs and necks.' - [sad, 38:30-33] 1 Or 'them'. The pronoun may be taken as referring to the sun or to the horses. However, most exegetes have taken it as referring to the sun and its setting. While Solomon was engaged in viewing the horses, the sun set, and time of the afternoon prayer (supererogatory or obligatory) elapsed. According to a tradition narrated from al-Imam al-Sadiq (pbuh), when Solomon noticed that the sun had set, he called out to the angels to bring it back so that he could offer the afternoon prayer. Also, according to this tradition, the wiping of legs and necks mentioned in the verse refers to the performance of ablution (wudu') before the prayer by Solomon and his men as prescribed in their Law. The people of intellect can clearly see a distinct similarities between the ablution performed by the Sunnis and by the people of Solomon, the Jews. *Hired by the so-called caliphate, before Amir al-Mu'minin 'Ali ibn Abi Talib (pbuh). Note: The translation and the exegete of the verse(s) is an extract from the phrase-by-phrase English translation by 'Ali Quli Qara'i.
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