I am 20 yrs old and I have got a late diagnosis as an adult of autism. I struggle with verbal and non-verbal communication, keeping conversations going (small talk) , making friends and I'm usually very silent and isolated. When meeting guests and people I usually just give greetings then go very silent or very occasionally say something. Especially since I have trouble keeping up with conversations, processing everything and even understanding the banter/humor. I can come off as aloof, odd or even rude. How much am I held accountable for my akhlaq, not having friendships, not giving the best social impression etc.
I always read hadith like this....
"Unfortunate is he who cannot gain a few sincere friends during his life and more unfortunate is the one who has gained them and then lost them (through his deeds)." ALI IBN ABI TALIB ((عليه السلام))
Would it be wrong for me to not want to ever meet guests and stay in my room instead?