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https://herald.dawn.com/news/1398672/ I was recently reading this article about Ismaili community in Pakistan. Ismaili community is very tight-knit community, they build hospitals, schools in rural areas, they have very high literacy rate. But the article was about really high suicide rate in that community. The article also mentioned that most of those suicides could actually be murders, but there's so way to find out because the whole community and police try to cover up the news, because such news are bad for the image of the community. I have heard praises from my parents many times for Ismaeli community and Khoja community. My understanding is that both communities are like cults, with very strict rules. To the outside world, these communities are ideal, they are thriving, they do a lot of charity work and they are very successful, but they control lives and wealth of their followers. I have felt that a lot of shias have become very concerned about the community and shia faith recently, and they want to create some kind of organization. We have seen a lot of cults in recent years, Scientology, NXVUM, etc, which seem like they are really good at improving people's lives and they produce very good image, but there's always something fishy going on behind closed doors. The community thrives at the expense of suffering of few people. I don't think any community should thrive at the expense of few people, so I don't agree with the ideologies of cults. If you are given a choice, will you agree to join a cult which has a good image, seems successful but you know there is injustice happening? I am asking because it seems like my family has joined such kind of cult. They are obsessed with shia faith, and they are always asking some kind of sacrifice. I don't like their ideology and I refuse to join them. There was a 21 year old guy in my community who committed suicide in 2010 or 2012. Does shia faith really control its followers' lives like a cult? I remember it was not like this before 2011.
Recently i feel as though i have just woken up. Like i suddenly found Allah, subhanahu Wa Ta'ala. I feel as though something has happened to me that i find difficult to explain. It feels like as though i am disconnected from my old self. Only the reflection in the mirror i recognise. A background check, please bare with me as my brief story kind of explains how i came to find Islam... I was born in a relaxed Muslim family, not 'guided' within Islam so to speak. I was from a family with good intentions, but ultimately a broken one. As a child i saw imagery which were haraam, an addiction which haunted me into my early twenties... My pursuit for such imagery disconnected me from reality, disconnected me from my family and those i loved. I became very lost, even isolated as a person within myself. I lost people around me who i loved through bad actions of my own. What is worse is that they were scared into the hands of those who hide behind the name and knowledge Islam, as a means of making large amounts of money through 'charities'. Their knowledge on Islam is good, but their intentions are certainly not. Even though things have gradually gotten worse for me, because of certain illegal actions within this group, i decided to turn to Islam and embrace it as i should have done many years ago (I attempted to embrace Islam a couple years ago but struggled on my own). It was either Islam or doing something very vicious and destructive amongst this group of people who claim to follow Islam but actually are those kind of 'muslims' we have heard about before who up make their own rules up as they go along. Physically i am a large muscular man, with copious amounts of natural strength alhamdullilah. It would have been very easy for me to inflict pain upon some of these men who did me wrong. Amongst these men is a fake Seyed, who has fooled those who i cared for, into working for his 'charity'. Or rather a number of charities which are scattered around the internet. One of these charities have been recently looked into (with the help of those who were once friends of these people), and have patterns of money laundering- into accounts no where near countries these charities proclaim to be working in aid of. Also, one of their charities were registered to have brought in £252,000 in a year. Guess how much of that was 'expenditure'? Just over £253,000. Someone working the books? Quite, the father of these people is an accountant. Oh, they also live in a property worth well over 1 million yet all there cars on the drive are worth a few hundred to a thousand (drug dealer style). Keep low profile while all that money is channeled elsewhere. Quite a picture eh?... Anyway, rather then expend my physical energy on these pathetic little individuals i decided to put my energy in learning as much as i can about Islam (although their Seyed is under investigation across the continent as he has been found out as a fraud in Iraq, Iran and Syria and falsely claims to be working for a certain very well respected Ayatollah, whose representatives of his have strongly denied as they no longer deal with him, due to many reports of him destroying families and also 'marrying' women only to never return to them). Learning about Islam is the main thing that has brought me some peace amongst all the turmoil i have been through. It is as though i have disconnected from the people who are wishing bad upon me, it is as though Allah is protecting me and repelling all their negative prayers, or their bad intentions and they are the ones who are going to be suffering, they will be exposed Inshallah. Ultimately it is Allah subhanahu Wa Ta'ala that they will have to answer to. Even though i lost people around me i loved, i feel Allah loves me, so that's enough. I feel i have done all i can to try and warn and protect those i cared for, but if they do not choose to listen. Their minds are too naive, because they are soft natured and not street educated. The problem is i have children of mine in the equation, so there is no way with the will of Allah behind me that i will allow my children to be lead astray within this cult, it would literally be over my dead body, then blood will pour. So my question is, how did you feel when you found Islam? I just want to know that what i am experiencing is normal perhaps? :) I know it will differ from person to person, but i feel as though i do not want to sleep unless i do my final prayer. I feel like i just want to read and learn more about Islam before i go to sleep. I am finding it hard to sleep even more then usual, as i am just wanting to feed my hunger for all things Islam? Have others experienced being addicted to learning as much as possible about Islam, in as short as possible time? رحمك الله Rahimakalla Ali
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