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  1. I am human, I make mistakes, therefore please correct my reasoning with references if possible, as I have separated from my partner over the matter of "displaying one's beauty", and perhaps I am wrong in my thought process. In the situation of a woman who does not observe hijab, but covers her body well; My reasoning: it is wrong to post your photos on social media where men are able to view your photo. Allah says in the quran do not display your beauty. You are a woman with beauty, you are posting a photo on social media, you are displaying yourself on social media, by posting on social media, it is an act of displaying yourself. I don't know how else I can say it. It is not the same as going to work. The thought here is "I am going to work". It is not the same as walking down the street to get somewhere and people see you, because the thought is "I am going to x place". When you post a photo, the thought is "I will post a picture of myself on instagram " in other words "I will display myself on instagram". You are therefore unnecessarily displaying your beauty to men. Even if the woman observes proper hijab, it is an act of "I will display myself on the internet by posting this photo"; it isn't a charity photo, a conference video, you giving a lecture, it's simply to share a "fun" or "precious" or "happy" moment with the people on social media (which includes male cousins, friends, strangers, etc.). Am I wrong in my thinking? Can someone explain it in a more articulate way rather than my caveman explanation?
  2. (bismillah) (salaam) I was hoping to get some advice on the topic of social hijab. I live in the UK. Before I explain my dilemma, I follow Sayed Sistani and I will give a brief summary of his rulings on this: 1. There is nothing wrong with talking to na-mahram out of necessity e.g. talking about work with opposite gender work colleagues, opposite gender doctors, cashiers, etc etc. 2. It is makruh to talk to na-mahram where its not necessary e.g. general chit chat with the opposite gender, laughing and joking with them, going out to cinema/restaurants with them 3. It is haram to talk to na-mahram to make them feel lust or if they make you feel lust or fall into any other type of sin. I work in a department of eight people, 6 are female and 3, including me, are male. This is how the seating plan is at work: male female female ------------------------------------------- (desks) female me female female female As you can see I sit in the centre amongst all female colleagues. We are all of similar age so like females of similar age they have become good friends and they talk about various things such as what they did on the weekend, their dating lives and so on. As you can see from the desk plan, I am in the middle of these conversations and can hear everything. The good thing is that they don't talk about anything inappropriate such as women stuff or backbiting and they are good people in that sense - just general stuff. My dilemma is that due to where I sit, I find myself getting drawn into the conversations with them that leads to joking around and laughter so something makruh under the marja that I follow and this is poking at my conscious and I am not sure what to do. I have tried different things such as I put on headphones and listen to lectures, nohas about ahlulbayt etc. so I can't hear what they say but also gives the impression I am busy and don't want to be disturbed and I even went through a phase where I kept my conversations strictly about work which worked but they thought something was wrong with me (lol). What do you guys think? A part of me feels we are social beings and what I am doing is normal. I don't hang out with them outside work hours. Other part of me is obviously aware of the rulings. I can keep my headphones in but all the time? Can I really expect myself to talk to them about nothing but work for the 8 hours or so I am at work? Also, are these general conversations necessary and fall under 1. in the marja rulings, in the sense that socialising is something necessary at work and harbours a healthy working relationship, meaning if I didn't do that, I would alienate myself. The good things is that I have established certain Islamic boundaries: - They accommodate my prayers and let me pray at work - Most of the females in my team are aware that contact with me it not allowed. Bless them, even when they accidentally tap my shoulder to get my attention or accidentally touch me in any way, they apologise! - They are happy with me not attending social events/work events where alcohol will be on the table I am sitting on Sorry this post is a bit unstructured, but given all the above, what do you guys think? I am leaning towards limiting it as much as possible so use the headphones (if you guys have other ideas and ways of limiting it let me know) and I even work home one a day a week which is helpful and generally try my best to uphold my marjas ruling. Some things I can definitely do is for example, not participate in work whatsapp convos etc ( we have two work whatsapp groups) cos thats not necessary and in my control, which I will look to stop. Other things I can't avoid e.g. next week I am travelling by car to a work meeting away from the office with a colleague so she will be in my car with me (just us two). I imagine this is makruh (being alone with na mahram) so is it possible to just talk about work and avoid general convo in an hour long journey? so I guess I should have just not offered her a lift and let her take the train? (its a fair distance to travel) but then would I come across rude and not courteous? Any advice appreciated Thanks, duas.
  3. I've saw on the news and youtube of young women being abused by men from South Asian/Middle Eastern/North African Culture under the name of Taharrush. Didn't the Prophet have daughters e.g. Fatimah, Zainab, Ruqayyah and Umm Kulthum, im sure Muhammad like any father would do damage to any man who tried to rape, humiliate, mutilate and kill his daughter/daughters. Im not religious or anything incase anyones asking, lost my way at 6 years old after cowards shot my da dead for no reason!
  4. Fascinating video about the statistics of attraction between the two sexes, with some rather interesting conclusions. He does, however, not consider the impact factors not relating to attraction have on divorce, relegating the phenomenon entirely to each sex's perception of the other's attractiveness. He also assumes that women's perception of their own attractiveness is the same as men's perception of it (which is the source of the data) when commenting on women 'settling'. Either way, quite an amusing watch!
  5. Salam My question here is that is it permissible for a women to visit the graveyard while she's on her period?
  6. Traditionally, differences in gender roles between men and women have been justified by actual innate difference between men and women. For example, in justifying the gender roles of carer for women, and provider for men, people may say that women are psychologically and emotionally better suited to stay at home and look after the children, whereas men are better suited to go out and work. In their attempt to undermine traditional gender roles, feminists have downplayed the actual difference between men and women, and claimed that either they don't exist, or where they do exist they are due to social/cultural factors, not innate biological factors, and therefore have no normative value. I would like to look into the evidence from psychology for differences in men and women, and to what extent these differences are innate/biological versus cultural / due to socialisation. I started with empathy, and read this 2014 review: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/25236781 They present evidence that empathy is biological in origin, and therefore women are naturally more empathetic then men. I have briefly noted some of the key evidence below. Its worth noting that empathy is a complex phenomenon, and has a pre-reflective element that can easily be studied in animals and babies, involving 'mirroring' which is when an individual copies/reflects they body language of another in their own behaviour. For example, writhing when seeing another in pain or automatically smiling when being smiled at. For details on the exact studies have a look at the review. Some key points: In animals with prolonged maternal care periods (where the female looks after the children for a prolonged period of time), females are more empathetic, e.g. in mirroring others, and they are also more quick to help other animals in need. This is explained by the fact that mums need to be responsive to baby's needs - having more empathy allows them to do that, and fulfill their roles as carers better. Women are overall more altruistic than men, and better at judging facial expressions, body language and emotion, all of which aid empathy. Female neonates more likely to cry, and cry longer than males when they hear an infant crying. This is a form of 'emotional contagion' and is likely a precursor to empathy. This cannot be explained by socialisation. Female neonates also show greater mimicry (copying behaviours). Giving males pacifiers which interfere with facial mimicry (ability to copy facial expressions) seems to have an impact on later emotional intelligence. Female toddlers show greater empathy than males. As do female adolescents compared to males Testosterone decreases empathy – one study involved giving it to females, and showed their ability to 'mind read' was reduced. 'Mind reading' is an important ingredient of empathy. Men have more testosterone than women. Oxytocin increases empathy, and women have more of it than men
  7. Jesus does not require women to wear a hijab but requires our hearts to be pure, modest, and full of him. Why in Islam women wear hijab and think that they are close to God when in fact it does mean anything because I know women who wear hijab and tons of makeup and flirt with men. Is Islam misleading women by requiring them to wear hijab? or is this rule just for men to better control themselves. I do not understand. And if it is for men why should I be responsible for another person's lust or desires? As a woman in Middle East country I noticed because I do not wear Hijab, muslim men think they have more "right" to look at me? They stare, in Western countries men are more respectful of women. Middle Eastern men seem to think women are for them and if they do not wear hijab they are trying to show off. Is this the effect of Islam on society? I feel the Western society is better because I am not stared at like here in Middle East.
  8. Salam, I am fairly new to Islam. I wear a hijab but not in the traditional way, because I love fashion and tend to experiment with new styles while still being modest. The bottom tips of my ears are usually exposed (I do not know if this is allowed) but I try to pull down my hats and scarves as much as I can to cover them. Am I allowed to wear modest earrings? Or would that be considered inappropriate in Islam? And if this would be wrong, then how about if my ears are covered while wearing a traditional hijab such as a shawl, but the earrings hang out of my scarf? I once hear from somebody that women can wear necklaces and bracelets as long as it is on top of clothing and not on skin. Is this true for earrings too? Thank you
  9. Hi,i'm a new user and i'm very happy to have found this online community. Today i want to talk about western women and their sexuality and the threat that women' sexuality represent for Islam. Many of you have already noticed that western women and in general women who live in advanced countries religion-free are more independent,have economical power,but mostly they do a lot more sex than muslim women and they tend also to betray more and also they tend to have less children and tend to marry less. Another thing that you may have noticed is that even if they're more sexually active than their muslim counterparts,they're also more selective and would like to go only with the top males(beautiful,rich and a very good status),while rejecting the average ones and bottom ones,while men(in general) are less selective and have a wide ranges of preferences. You may also have noticed that more and more muslim women are flying away from Islam and acting like western women Why is that thing?Why are western women more selective than muslim women and men in general?Why in just a few decades have western women got so picky and selective? The reason behind this is that western women have gained a lot of rights and they also have gained a lot of economical power and so independence.I'm going to explain to you better in the following lines: In the 20th century and previous centuries women have very few rights and very little access to the workplace because most of the jobs were physical and so men were fitter for them than women and in addiction there was no thing like maternity leave to help women economically when they get pregnant.So they hadn't economical power and therefore independence and in order to survive and get food and a roof over their head they had to marry a man,even if they don't want to.In addiction in the western society in the older centuries religion had a very important role,that now it has been lost with all his values. But now,that's changed and women have economical power,independence,maternity leave and the possibility of making the choices they want about their life. Isn't that great,yeah?Certainly it's great for them,but not for many men that lost the chance of having free sex and a wife and so they're conducting a very poor and shameful life where they only work to survive,but not to live since sex and the love of a caring wife are a mirage for them. But why is that? Like i said before women are more selective than men by nature but their selectivity in dating a partner appears only when they have rights and independence. What do i mean when i say that women are more selective by NATURE: According to science the humankind belongs to the animal reigns and like every other animal our purpose is to reproduce ourselves in order to carry on the human specie.Men (since they are phisically stronger and have the possibility to submit a woman)were given a great sex drive and much less selective attitude in dating,while women since they're the ones who carry the pregnancy and since the pregnancy is very long,painful and is some case mortal had(and have)to choose the best men who could protect her wife and guarantee their children a good genetic(intelligent,beautiful,tall,strong). In fact in the prehistory only 1 man out of 17 had the possibility to reproduce because very few men got all the women. https://psmag.com/environment/17-to-1-reproductive-success Then men in order to balance things had introduced monogamy along with religions,so that every man could have his own wife and live a good life without feeling anger for not having one. But now things have changed because religions in the west had lost all of its meaning mostly among the youths(either men or women)and things like divorce have been introduced and if you look at the statistics women are much more likely than men to initiate a divorce,because by divorcing they get a lot of privileges(the ex-husband has to give her ex-wife his house and part of his salary),but mostly they can change their partners and have a lot of sex. But what do women find attractive in a man? Basically 3 things.Looks,Money and Status. Looks is the external aspect and women mostly care about the face,that's to say that if you're fit but ugly in face you won't attract women.Contrary to what the popular culture says beauty isn't subjective but objective,the objective thing they're talking about is the likeliness that's still related to the beauty:the more beautiful you are,a greater likeliness you'd like to have and you'll attract more women and viceversa.A beautiful man is also regarded by women's brain as a carried of good genetics because usually beautiful people have also a good genetic. Unfortunately women regard very few men as beautiful,while men are less picky. Money is very important because even if women have got economical independence they're still looking for a man who can guarantee them a good life,also because women want to show other women they got a powerful man on their side who can give her all what she desire. Status is another important factor,that's more variable than the other two and it's the social reputation,the fame that a person has.The more you're taken in high consideration in your environment the more women you'll be able to attract. Women Love Beautiful,Powerful Men and Hate Those Who Aren't So and Dare to Ask Them a Date. Muslim Countries and Muslim Environment are still unaffected by these phenomenon because women have less independence and less economical power,but as soon as muslim women will get them they will start to care less about religion,family and they will think only about their pleasure,especially their sexual pleasure. Their sexual power is the reason why all the religions of the world have given them less rights than men,because ancient men were sages and knew that if women got equal rights like men they would have overthrown them along with society(western birth rate is declining with no exception)because of their sexual power and their strict selectivity. Research that shows the women are more selective than men: https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC1986604/ I hope you'll like this artcicle and that this will give you new way to reflect and think. Islam is the best religion and it will be forever.
  10. When the eastern boogeyman called Osama bin Laden, Taliban, Al-Qaeda, ISIL, ISIS, Iran wears thin and loses credibility in the eyes of the average person in the West, we get these desperate garbage attempts to regurgitate and refresh the negativity surrounding the subject. Here we go again... 'We won't wear hijabs': Chess queens threaten to boycott world championships in Iran after being told they MUST wear Islamic headscarfs There's even a Reddit thread which had around 9000+ upvotes yesterday, but is going down rapidly. WARNING: If you wish to avoid cancerous comments regarding Muslims, Iran and its citizens, DO NOT, I repeat, DO NOT visit the comment section of either the article or the Reddit thread.
  11. Guest

    Women in war

    Is a woman allowed to fight in a war for the sake of Allah? Have there been any female warriors in Islamic history?
  12. Salaam all So, I have noticed that females are drama-centric. There's just always something. Stirring up whatever because they get bored maybe? Just generally difficult. I have known of females who say that they cannot live with other females - because the displeasure goes up like an exponential scale with each additional female, apparently. They don't even like each other. They are very difficult to get along with in any setting. I remember one female I asked to do a simple favor since she was over in that area any way. "No." Even though I was recording the professor's lectures for the whole class, and she would watch it. Here I am doing a favor for the whole class. I didn't bring this fact up. It's like, her brain can just ignore such a kind act. Or the brain knows the act and chooses to respond in that way. Like "I get mine, furget you." Time after time after time. It's like that movie "Gone Girl" with Ben Afleck. At one point, he say something like every woman I know is coming at me. And don't let the hijab fool you. At the masjid, this one guy would stop the sermon and quiet the female section because they were too loud. Multiple times. In one night. I cannot become a women hater and think of them as inferior because the religion says we are equal. For others out there without certainty in religion, they may have a difference in opinion. Why is female nature this way? It has to be the way the female is designed. Is there anything in the religion about the female disposition? Like any sophisticated software, there has to be a way to hack into it with enough time. IS there a manual. It feels like every man has to be a psychoanalyst just to operate in any interaction with females.
  13. Salam Brothers and Sisters. I have heard from some non Arabs that within Arab culture, polygamy is generally more accepted. I would like some Arabs to confirm or deny this based on whether in their experience it is true or false. So, is Polygamy a common practice? Are the women fine with it? Do the women show signs of distress and worry when thinking of their husbands being with another man? In my opinion, all women are the same and no woman would want to be without their husband a single night unless that husband is just not nice to her. In this discussion I am only concerned about wives with loving and loved husbands, I know many women, if they hate their husbands, would push them away to be rid of them by letting them get marry again happily. Also I have discussed this topic academically with my wife, and I have learned that wives may be disgusted by thinking about their husband being with other women sexually, is this true or are some women not concerned whether another woman has been "there". Married people's advice is preferred and please! No Arabs giving their view about how Arabs are unless they have Arab in laws. [MOD NOTE: Your topic asking for polygamous Arabs to talk about their sex life is not appropriate and not approved.]
  14. If I have understood the following clip correctly, according to the Sunni scholar Muhammad Naeem of Karachi, Pakistan, an endeavour directed at the protection of women is contrary to Islam. http://www.reuters.com/article/us-pakistan-rights-women-idUSKCN0VY1QE If I have not understood correctly, would someone be good enough to explain. Thanks
  15. Assalam Alaikum, My name is Farah and I am currently working on an observational documentary for a UK channel which will look to explore the opinions and lifestyles of a diverse section of British Muslims and be used as a platform to voice what Islam means to individual Muslims across the country. In particular we’re looking to reflect the views and opinions of ordinary Muslims and I’d love to feature strong voices which are often under-represented on mainstream media, these often include voices from minority communities within the Muslim faith and I am especially interested in talking to women who are Shia Muslim. The idea would be to bring 10 Muslims from across the UK together to represent a cross-section of the community and explore how each practices their faith. These would include 5 men and 5 women. We are looking for very ordinary people and not scholars or imams and we absolutely don’t expect anyone to represent an entire community – each of the 10 will only be representing their own views. So there is no restriction on how you should practice your faith. It would be great to know if any of the sisters on here would be interested in learning more. Please do drop me a message or feel free to respond on this thread. Jazakh'Allah
  16. Salam everyone I have a question on the status of women in shia islam (Shia Ahadith books and Ahlulbayt books), I have heard some narrations related to Imam Ali that he said that women are dumb or something like that which I think he would never say. And there was a whole book which really degraded the women by using some ahadith of Imam Ali (a.s) like a girl should not raise her voice on his husband and should never object him. HAVE ANYONE OF YOU HEARD OF THIS, WHAT IS THE AUTHENTICITY OF THESE AHADITHS/ NARRATIONS ?
  17. If I wear a very long Hijab (I think its called Jilbab? Example here, Do I have to wear clean clothing underneath as well? (e.g. new pyjama's) Because I go to the bathroom in my pyjama's, can I wear something on top of them to pray in?
  18. Alsalamu Alaikum Im a 25-year old women born, raised and living in Denmark. I newly graduated and until a couple of month ago worked in a pharmacy in a rural area in Denmark. I started encountering racism (or at least that's when I became aware of it) when I was 16. Every time since then it has been because of my hijab who seems to trigger these ignorant rusty mostly old wrinkly godless people. It got really bad when I started working at the pharmacy and every other day I had to listen to people muttering about me to my collegues, staring at me like Im disgusting, refusing to be helped/served by me and even yelling at me and calling me disgusting and sexistic names regarding my ethnicity and hijab. And every single time - to avoid the drama - I was the one who had to go hide in the back of the pharmacy until the stupid customer was gone. My boss never asked me If I was okay or what happend - I felt like I should just be happy that I could work there and that since the hijab is my choice I should live with the consequences. Only one single time my collegues asked the customer to leave but that was because he was yelling at them too - for having me there of course. I felt terrible and sometimes so scared I would cry. It interferred with my ability to get my work done. I studied 5 years at uni to help people stay alive giving them their stupid medicine and this is what I get. As a result I feel completely demotivated and exhausted, when before graduating I felt I had so much knowledge to give and I could not wait to get out in the big world to show everyone what I learned and what I was capable of. Now I dont even feel like I want to work anymore. Denmark is generally a very racist country (I say generally, because I've also met the most amazing people here), Im tired of reading awefull facebook threads about muslims and islam. I cant breathe anymore. Here we even have politicians encouraging this racist behaviour by being racist themselves. I know Allah swt is with me and that I must be rewarded for my patience, but it just really really hurts. I feel depressed and unsuccesful which is killing me. I catch myself just waiting for the next racist episode to happen when Im outside. Since my parents dont work and have not been subjected to very much racism they dont fully understand the extent of what I experience. I have only one hijabi friend, but she lives in the capitol city where it's much more natural to see muslims. All my other friends are non-hijabis - they dont get it either. Giving up my hijab would be on my dead body. I would never do that and specially not because of some old stupid racist degenerating toads. Im sorry about my bad English - Im too tired to google translate every word. I need advice - not to stop it - because that's impossible - but to deal with it. I thought I could deal with it by feeling sorry for them being so ignorant or by viewing it in a humorous way but I keep getting this lump in my throat and my face blushes every time it happens. I have no one to support me in this.
  19. if their is a women only majlis and you decide to recite a noha and you know theirs a man in that house not in the same room but the house. is it ok to recite it ??
  20. In the name of Allah. In Islamic school of thought, a female is respected. She is treated as a human, not as a mannequin. All people must see her, talk to her, and communicate with her on the basis of her social role and her characteristic, not for just seeing her body. Imagine a female person who goes to a picnic and is according to her mind free to wear (or not wear) every clothes she likes. If she gets a disease on her skin, others will dislike her body. It is because they looked at her with her beauty not as she was a citizen or basically a woman. In Iran - which is an Islamic country and therefore wearing bikinis is forbidden in public places for women - they wear it on the shores in specific places which are prepared for swimming. Females go there and swim with bikinis. Some families have private villas near the beach and wear what they like. Even some families go to some parts of the beach where they are alone and do what they like. Women and girls have special parks where they can freely walk, jog, exercise, and do sports without hijab. So even in Islamic countries, it is possible for women to feel free on the beaches. But absolutely not as European countries at parks or beaches. I think females in some parts of the world are not free to wear hijab and are oppressed. For example, in France, the police recently has banned a Muslim female of her hijab and ordered her to take off her burkini. I think women Muslims should not attend in the beaches where they cannot wear their hijab.
  21. I was Reading A Report by Dr Ashar on Pakistan,s Young Man And Women I am Shoked After Reading the Research (That More Then One crore Muslim sisters in Pakistan above 18 Year Old are Unmarried and Waiting Some body For Nikkah And 70 percent in Them Are Getting Old) , After Reading That Report A Question Raise in My Mind That Who is responsible and Why our Muslim Scholars and Mullah,s Never Highlight This issue Before And This Ratio increased Day by Day..... Whats You Think About This ... ? Thanks: Haider Sherazi
  22. SALAM!! In Quran it is said for men to provide food and clothing to your wife. For wives it is guided to always keep happy your husband and obey what he says to except for Haram. But what about giving love to your wives. Here by love I don't mean (intercourse), I mean to always make her feel that her husband is loyal to her and is very happy to have her. Is there any thing said in Quran to always love your wife other than just fulfilling her material needs?
  23. ASSALMO ALAIKOM!!I have been very curious about this fact that men are allowed to hit women in Islam very lightly that it should not cause any injury. However some of our Muslim brothers don't really care about their injury they beat women or even some beat them until died (mostly in Afghanistan). “As to those women on whose part you fear ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next), refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly, if it is useful), but if they return to obedience, seek not against them means (of annoyance). Surely, Allaah is Ever Most High, Most Great.” [al-Nisaa’ 4:34] If a woman rebels against her husband and disobeys his commands, then he should follow this method of admonishing her, forsaking her in bed and hitting her. Hitting is subject to the condition that it should not be harsh or cause injury. Al-Hasan al-Basri said: this means that it should not cause pain. ‘Ata’ said: I said to Ibn ‘Abbaas, what is the kind of hitting that is not harsh? He said, Hitting with a siwaak and the like. [A siwaak is a small stick or twig used for cleaning the teeth - Translator] I have only two questions which are eating me inside. 1: If men are guided to be the protector of women in Islam, why are they allowed to hit women? 2: What if men disobey women, are women allowed to hit men or beat them?
  24. In the western world Islam is often seen as oppressing women. In general, I don't think this is true. But, in Saudi Arabia woman can't drive by law. This seems ridiculous to me. I don't even know how they uphold such a law. Also, I have heard that women are required to wear a head scarf in the Islamic Republic of Iran. In the west women can make money exposing themselves in most of Europe and the Americas'. I find it absolutely amazing that people can make millions of dollars having sex on screen. These people are genuine "celebrities" the likes of [names of people involved in illicit activities removed] are very well known people in American media. How is this world so damn crazy? Why would God allow such debauchery to exist in the world?
  25. SalamAlaikum, Today we see several men noha khwans (groups) that recite nohas online, publish videos etc, for example Voices of Passion, Ali Fadhil etc. Does Islam allow females to do this if they do not show their faces in the videos and only have an audio playback of their voices reciting nohas etc. to spread the message of Islam and Karbala? Several say they aren't allowed, however when we check with Imam Sistani, he says it is permissible as long as the lady does not intend to develop wrong feelings in the male's minds... IHH
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