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  1. Can we apply rule of mutah on married women? left by his husband more than an year and he is not taking care of her as well, no divorce file yet and I don't want any haram relation between us, she was my first love and now we want to continue our relationship. Please help with the query I am in taqleed with ayatollah khamenai
  2. Salaam everyone, I was actually wondering about a Shi'a girls stance on marriage. I mean, I was wondering if say a Shi'a girl says her consent to the marriage 3 times to the niqah, but her niyyah isn't for it, meaning she doesn't actually want to get married to this person, does the marriage still count? If she says yes outwardly, but no niyyah inside to say yes, and doesn't want to, but is being forced to say yes? Especially in the case that the girl does not plan to have any "relations" with this person after the forced marriage anyway. Btw, for that, say if the marriage is valid, is it necessary for the girl to do acts of marriage with this person? Or if she doesn't want to she doesn't have to? I would appreciate any rulings or any information that could be found on this. Jazakallah & FiAmanAllah
  3. Salam, dear brothers and sisters in Islam I have recently contracted a temporary marriage with a girl from Ahlul-Kitab (Catholic) she is a virgin girl and I was seeking to inquire if the marriage contract that I have done with her is valid, I hope to not God forbid have this be an invalid contract in which would lead me to disobeying Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) the permission to "date" was granted ( I was told that would be considered عرف) I explained to the girl that there will be a fixed term and I chose one year and also for the dowry I said it was like a gift and instead of providing a specified gift I just gave $20 I am not sure if she remembers that the term was for one year but I did state it clearly to her through text and as for the oath I also explained what it meant in English on text and then in person I told her to repeat after me the words in Arabic in which she complied the words were a bit broken, but understandable. The father of the girl has passed therefore the permission to “date” was given by the mother the girl knows that this is a form of marriage contract in which I stated briefly would protect her rights and honor her If this is not a valid Mutah contract how may I make it as such (the more thorough and concise answer the better) And if this is a valid Mutah contract thank you for clearing my conscience may Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) grant you all the intercession of the Prophets holy progeny I really love this girl and I hope to one day marry her if she is guided to the path of the Ahlul Bayt ((عليه السلام)) she has shown great willingness to debate and discuss religion and has told me if she is shown the truth she would adhere to it therefore I am trying fervently by the grace of Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) to provide the evidences needed in substantiating Shia Islam and in rebuking any deviated beliefs posed by the Catholics and their traditions respectively Side note: the mother allows us to date and perhaps is knowledgeable over certain intimate acts that may occur in which are known to be evident between “dating teenagers” but by no means would accept or agree to any act of copulation and or most likely oral gratification and the use of the other partners hands to aid the other in reaching ecstatic relief would the use of such means of intimate acts between one another; other then the means of osculation be prohibited for the acts listed above such as oral gratification and the use of the other partners hands, aid in demolishing any deviated acts of self-gratification as the role of a Mutah contract does so evidently and respectfully through the protection of the rights of the female counterpart If this marriage is a valid one would such intimate acts be prohibited and would copulation be allowed or not We are both virgins I am 19 and she is 18 if such acts are prohibited how may I seek to make them permissible and in what way is it deemed fit to do so May Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) bless you all and grant you all the intercession of the Ahlul Bayt thank you for reading and aiding this lost soul in maintaining his faith clinging on to the rope of Allah through the aid of such pious and forbearing lovers of the truth
  4. This brother on Reddit needs help... Let's focus on the etiquette [adab] of Mutah as described by Rasulullah (S) and his Ahlul Bayt (A). Let's NOT focus on the rulings [ahkam] (we have thousands of threads on this already, we all know the rules by know, and it's not hard to figure out the rules anyway, all you have to do is check your Marja's risalah)
  5. Salaam I have met a nice girl. We both want to get married. Everything is in place, the families have met each other and everyone is on board and we have everyones support. Only thing her father does not permit a mutah. Her parents prefer us to remain na mahram until nikah. The nikah will happen in July or August. My family are non Muslim so they are not in a position to be able to help. The girl wants to do mutah too, we both now want to become halal for each other. She has tried to convince them but now its my turn. It will be too difficult to remain na mahram for 8 months for both. I don't mean from a sexual perspective (we live in different countries), just generally because we are both getting more and more attached to each other and developing feelings. The parents argument is we have already hung out, whatsapped etc so just carry on doing that but that was different- those things were happening when we were still finding out about each other. Now the situation is different as we have reached certainty about each other, have feelings etc. I don't mind whatever conditions he wants. Its just appropriate to become halal now. What religious and practical arguments can I use to convince him? Duas
  6. I honestly never understood why twelvers make Nikah Mutah. 7 of the eight madhabs forbid it. With only twelvers being the exception. Zaydis also forbid. We have narrations from Ali (r.a) that the Messenger of Allah (s.a.w.s) forbid mutah after Khaybar, now you can argument that Omar (r.a) enforced it as Haram, but you can't make argumentation that Abu Bakr (r.a) didn't do it and only Omar do it if you think that Abu Bakr (r.a) was wrong in a number of issues. Obs - Omar was closer to Ali.
  7. Guest

    Mutah over internet

    Salam I don't know if you can do mutah over the internet. I have trouble in finding a fatwa on it. Jazakullah
  8. Hello, I just want to give a brief background on my past situation and then my current situation. Can you please help me by telling me the truth backed with sources if it is halal for me to do this? Thank you I was proposed to by a man (he is Shia) who I know to be extremely respectful, hard-working and kind (which is very hard to find in general and especially in our society to be honest). However, my family prevented and forbade me from marrying him for one reason only- and that is his nationality. In our country, nationality is as important as the sect (due to culture/traditions etc.) and I had too much respect for my parents to disobey them and I know in Islam disobedience to parents is haram. I also didn't have the heart to hurt my mother even though I have never wanted anything as badly as to get married to that specific person. Please note that I did not do anything haram with this man. I became very depressed as I am already in my very late 20's and it was my first time actually wanting to get married. The same night I cried and did ziyaraat ashura for 40 nights because I wanted God to let us be together. I found out months later that there was a very high chance he will be able to get the same nationality as I have but it will take around 3-5 years. It has been two and a half years since he proposed and we are still good friends and it is very obvious that he has the same intentions. I know you might think its easy to find someone else but I don't want to get married just for the sake of getting married. I want someone who understands me on an intellectual basis, respects me, motivates me to work harder, is not an angry person etc. and he has all those qualities. Is it possible to engage in some sort of mut'aa marriage even though I don't want to have sex (I only would do that if its a permanant marriage). i just want to feel like I am with my partner (hold hands, kiss etc.). We have every intention of getting married when he gets his nationality but the wait is just very frustrating. I feel like my whole life is on hold over a very stupid condition from my parents. I have decided that even if they do not allow me to get married when he gets his nationality- I will still get married as I believe it is something they will be able to tolerate long term. But for now I feel very frustrated that I can't marry him due to something so small and I don't want to lose him as he is the most respectful person I have ever met. Please can you help guide me if I am doing something wrong or have parental advice on how to handle this situation?
  9. Salam everyone. ive been with my partner for 2 years and we haven’t done anything yet. My parents know of him but are delaying the conversation of marriage due to him being a different nationality. we both are getting impatient and recently he has been told that we could do mutah without sexual intercourse? Apparently if I am a virgin, you need to ask for a fathers permission but if I am not then I don’t need to? I am 22 living with my parents, however I consider myself cable of financially supporting myself. (I pay for everything for myself, I give my dad rent money every 2 weeks). I follow sayed sistani and so does he. Thank you in advance
  10. Salaam Alaikum everyone. I am wondering a lot about Mut'ah. I feel like I've made a mistake agreeing upon a Mut'ah. - We are a young couple with different backgrounds. I've met his family and they are all were nice to me and I was very happy meeting all of them. He's met my family recently but it feels like we don't fit to be together. My family is a Catholic though they don't practice it, my father drinks and my mom is a smoker. I recently converted and I am learning a lot about Islam through him and through reading the Qu'ran and reading a lot of fatwas. Anyway, I feel like we are drifting away from each other as he sees my family as sinners. I feel so bad because I do love him and I do know that with Islam, I'll shed light to my parents about these bad habits. I believe that with a stronger belief and a strong will- I will be able to help them to understand that with these vices- not only it deteriorates their body but it's not good in a long run. - We haven't been dating for quite a long time but under Mut'ah, he got me pregnant. I am still pregnant with his child but I am reading a lot about what could happen if he breaks the contract- would I be able to get the custody of my child or it will be all on him? I am financially stable and I know that I'd be able to take care of myself and the baby but I've read that it will be all in his custody. Is there anyone out there can clarify me about this situation? - Would it matter if he hasn't given me his dowry? I can't find any details on this matter. I've got so many questions and I feel like all the questions I have right now are all quite tricky but please, I need your help. Thank you so much.
  11. Salaamz All - Just recently I was listening a lecture from one of the Sayed Qazwinis (there are so many Qazwinis) where he talked about the risks of reckless Aqd -e- Mutah. Most of his opinions came from the fact that we are not robots, have emotions, get emotionally attached, touch other person's life in many intimate ways, and an eventual culmination of the Aqd may leave emotional, physical, lateral (pregnancy), marital (comparing future spouses with the muta partners), social (living among Shi'a who follow the thoughts of Umer and consider Muta wrong) hangovers. This thread is not to seek your opinion on the validity of the Aqd of Muta, instead share your opinions of how to mitigate the risks of during and post Aqd issues. A few risk mitigation items that I could come up with are below. Please comment on these and add others. 1. Stipulating the end terms with the stipulation of how to detach emotionally. 2. Making the woman write terms of what will happen in case of pregnancy. 3. Issues around discretion.
  12. Why Shias perform Mutah??? Please don't mind sorry to say, isn't it Disgusting??? Men having Muta with different Women and Women having Muta with different men.
  13. Far too often, you find that Shias are attacked at permitting temporary marriage. They accuse Shias of permitting something akin to prostitution (which is really odd, given the companions performed Mutah and the Prophet (saw) permitted it, and it would be strange to permit prostitution). What many Shias may not really know is that aside from the Hanbalis and a number of the Salafi scholars, two major Sunni Madhabs permit a man and or a woman to get married, with the intention they will divorce, so long as they do not explicitly make it a condition in their marriage. So in effect, a man can choose to marry a woman for a month, and then divorce her after a month and return to wherever he came from. In fact, not only is this essentially like temporary marriage, it actually throws the poor woman into confusion as she was not expecting someone who committed in marriage to suddenly change in that manner, and this can have adverse effects upon her. With Mutah, both parties are aware of what they are getting into. This sort of marriage is supported by the Hanafis, Shafi's, and Salafi scholars like Ibn Baz (a major scholar). Don't bother telling Salafis about ibn Baz because they will pull their classic cop-out card 'but they aren't infallible like your infallible imams , we use the word 'infallible imams' because like an election technique we drill in the same catchphrase again and again so put forth a message and so here it is 'infallible' imam'. However, a number of scholars within the Hanafi and Shafi' Madhab even permit a man and a woman to both know that they will cut off their marriage after a particular time period and so long as they don't explicitly put it into the marriage contract, that marriage is permissible. PS: This kind of marriage is valid according to most Sunnis anyway, but the distinction is in whether it is Harram to do or not, but once you do it, you become Halal for each other. If you aren't aware Hanafis comprise of the largest denomination of the four Madhabs, and along with Shafi'i muslims would make up well over half the number of Sunnis we have today. If you also take into account those who accept the Fatwah of ibn Baz and other fringe opinions among the Salafis purported by major scholars, Sunni Islam permits based on the dominant view for a man and or a woman to get married with the intention of divorcing after a certain period, and among those that permit it, some permit a man and a woman to both know the intentions of the other but not to add it in the official contract. Did i also forget to add, 'great' Salafi scholars like Ibn Taymiyyah, ibn Qayim (they love to quote him in motivational quotes), Ibn Hazm, Shawkani, Subki and others permit a grown man to be breastfed by a woman? You might think i have gone into an extreme to claim this and that it can not possibly true, but there is nothing more to it, it is a fact. They try to bury this truth and reality so you don't know about it! While the majority of their 'sect' permits what is effectively Mutah, and a number of notable scholars of theirs permitted what is essentially grotesque contact between those of opposite sex, here they are accusing the followers of Muhammed and ale Muhammed (peace be on them all) of allowing prostitution! The same people who among them have youth abusing Shias on Mutah, yet have girlfriends they procure outside of it! Quotes/Useful material to use: [IBN BAZ - A MAJOR SALAFI SCHOLAR, PART OF THE 'HOLY' SALAFI TRIAD OF SCHOLARS THAT ARE IBN UTHAYMEEN, AL ALBANI AND IBN BAZ] "If, on the other hand, a man sees that the woman and her former husband really want to get back together, therefore with the intention of helping them out, he marries her then divorces her after consummating the marriage, then this will be permissible with the condition that no one knows of his intention."https://hanafilegalrulings.blogspot.co.uk/2017/01/halala-after-divorce.htmlIn fact, the marriage is Valid and it is permissible according to a number of scholars in the Hanafi Fiqh, if the man and woman know their intention is to marry for a week, or a month, or a year, but do not explicitly stipulate it in the contract. It is clear cut temporary marriage, and the only thing differentiating it is the explicit inclusion in the marital contract:"If both the man and the woman marrying each other know of each others intention (i.e. that they are getting married for halaala), but at the time of marriage, the condition of halaala is not mentioned, then in this case some ulama (scholars) say that it is not permissible (although, just like in the first scenario, if someone does it, the marriage itself will be valid and the woman will become halaal for her first husband). Other ulama say that such a marriage is permissible. It is therefore better to avoid this."https://hanafilegalrulings.blogspot.co.uk/2017/01/halala-after-divorce.html(Ahsanul Fataawa: 5/154, Saeed)(Fataawa Usmani: 2/278, Maktaba Ma’ariful Quran)(Qaamoosul Fiqh: 2/426, Zamzam Publishers)(Raddul Muhtaar: 5/51, Darul Ma’rifa) " Similarly, if the woman gets married to a man with the intention that after the marriage and its consummation, she will ask for divorce and thereafter get married to her first husband, it will be permissible with the condition that no one knows of her intention."https://hanafilegalrulings.blogspot.co.uk/2017/01/halala-after-divorce.html(Ahsanul Fataawa: 5/154, Saeed)(Fataawa Usmani: 2/278, Maktaba Ma’ariful Quran)(Qaamoosul Fiqh: 2/426, Zamzam Publishers)(Raddul Muhtaar: 5/51, Darul Ma’rifa) PS: Other than Ibn Baz, who goes against most of the Salafis in his ruling, the Hanafi Fatwahs are not just 'rouge' rulings by 'individuals'.
  14. Salam all, I was looking for some guidance on something. Alhamdulilah I have just came back from Ziyarat and after speaking with a Alim there, he made me make a promise and that was to drop my most dangerous sin. Ashamed to admit, but as a young male, my worst sin is istimna(masturbation). The Alim advises that I get married to stay away from sin and take care of human needs in halal fashion however since I will not be getting married for at least another 2-3 years due to school and parents not willing til completion, he recommended mutah with Ahle kitab. my issue is that I feel guilty doing Nikkah mutah solely for the sake of justifying pleasure, and just because it is better than istimna. Also, to pay someone willing here as a dowry, I feel like is very similar to prostitution and have a hard time accepting that. I am only asking because I want to take care of my human desires in a halal fashion and it’s getting to the point my mind is consumed by these dirty thoughts. I usually controlled this by astagfirullah but I have stopped that now. please looking for some help or advice. Jazak
  15. Guest


    Assalam Wa Aleikum, i really need some help here, as I am so confused, In regards to whether i am a free woman and my iddah is over. It might be important to note that i follow Sayed Sistani. So I am a sister from Denmark and i contracted a mutah with a man for 1 year. We were together for 8 months, but then We decided to end our mutah and gift me back the remaining 4 months. Since none of us really speak arabic, (although we could pronounce the actual mutah contract - and so, we did do that In arabic, because we found that easy) But he did not say the "divorce-formular" In arabic (I am aware of the fact, that there is no actual divorce in mu'tah, but for the sake of making it easy, I'll refer to it, as "divorce") so he pronounced the "divorce formular" In english and then In danish. So one of each language. The reason for this, and our intention of saying it In both languages, was so that we could make sure, that he had pronounced it properly and that i was sure, to have been given back my remaining time of 4 months. Now i am confused, since i read the following; in mut’a there is a waiting period which must be observed after the time period of the marriage has expired or the man has returned the remainder of the period to the woman. It consists of two menstrual periods, provided she menstruates. This statute is based upon the following two hadith: 'To divorce a slave, one must pronounce the formula of divorce twice; her waiting period is two menstrual periods' (the Imam Musa). It has been related that al-Shaykh al-Mufid,al-'Allama al-Hilli, Ibn Idris, and a number of the other ulama' hold that the waiting period of a wife by mut'a is two fuhrs i.e., two major ablutions following menstrual periods. They base this opinion on the hadith related from the Imam al-Baqir: '. ..If he is a free man married to a slave girl, he divorces her by pronouncing the formula of divorce twice; her waiting period is two fuhrs.' And in the hadith quoted above, it is seen that the waiting period of a wife by mut'a is the same as that of a slave girl. so now i am confused if whether or not, he did actually gift me back the time correctly. Because although he did say it twice, In two different languages, we did NOT have the intention of doing it Because we thought we had to do it. I did not even know about the hadith until a few days ago. So my first question is: did he really gift me the time back properly and is my iddah valid? My second question is, i already had 2 menstruations since he left me. He left me on the 29th of september, i got my first period on the 9th of october. Then it ended about the 14th - 15th of october. Then i did ghusl. then i got my second period on the 15th of november and it lasted until the 21th - 22th of november. Then i did ghusl. Does that count as 2 menstrual cycles or do I have to wait until it has actually been 2 months, counted by days. So for example, 1 month of 31 days and a second month for 31 days = 62 days? And if so, did my iddah start on the 29th of september, when he left me, or did it start the 9th of october, when my first period started? OR do i In fact, have to wait another 3 weeks, until i get my period for the third time? My last question is, i don't remember if i was pak from my earlier menstruation period, BEFORE he left me, as i did not pray at that time, i never used to do ghusl that much, after ending a menstruation. I Think i maybe was pak, But i just dont remember. On Sistanis page it says following; 2518. There is no question of of divorce in the case of a woman with whom temporary marriage is contracted, for example, for one month or one year. She becomes free when the period of her marriage expires or when the man forgoes the period of her marriage by saying: "I hereby exempt you from the remaining time of marriage", and it is not necessary to have a witness nor that the woman should be Pak from her Haidh. so it says that I did not need to be pak BEFORE he left me? My very last question is, if it is haram to start talking to some one else, about marriage. Because i am talking to someone at the moment. i have had my period 2 times, But i just don"t know if i really am free or not. I pray that one of you, Can help me with my questions, as my Sayed from Denmark is out travelling and very busy, and i just need to know. Assalamu Wa Aleikum Wa Rahmatullahi Wa Barakatuh
  16. Guest


    I am a revert.. and the lone in a house full of wahabis.. i reverted 3 years ago. And i am from [EDIT]. Now i know i cant have a sunni nikah which is not a nikah actually.. how can i find some shia revert for marriage or for mutah in [EDIT]. It is serious. No pun no exaggeration intended.
  17. Can anyone explain Can a person do mutah with jis own sister or mother?
  18. Guest


    Asalamaalykum My cousin entered a Mutah Marraige without asking her Wali's consent. She was not aware about this rule and wanted to do everything in a halal manner. She was a virgin before the Mutah Marraige but she now she has had sexual intercourse. She is very scared what can she do about it now?
  19. Personally, I find the the concept of mutah very very hard to consume. For one, it is a choice. Secondly, I cannot even imagine my daughter's virginity being taken by some temporary contract like this. The best thing about Islam for me is how much it protects and values the purity of its women. How much it emphasis for not just men but women too to lower their gazes and keep good intentions about everything. Then there is this Mutah. How.. I mean how is this even acceptable? It sounds so wrong. Maybe i dont know much about all this but I cant seem to grasp this concept of this being right at all. A temporary marriage? Isnt marriage supposed to last forever between soulmates? A lasting bond? Are you not gonna be with your husband in heaven? Arent couples made in heaven? Women's virginity is such a sacred thing. Her Iman and every single thing. I like how its a choice for the woman too but this type of marriage contract. Nah uh? Never gonna happen. Also there is that fact that it is not acceptable in every type of Islam. In all honesty it sounds like 'loaning a women' fine yeah i get that that woman will have all the rights of a wife and will be respected and all but still for a time? its like loaning or hiring to be cruder despite the fact that woman gets a choice in it. What bothers me is how its acceptable. If someone could explain why its significance and its rulings that would be great. Still however no matter what I strongly think that not many will agree to this kind of proposition ever if they are pious. I mean a man taking responsibility for a woman in a marriage.. its such a sacred thing. A bond its everlasting. How would a woman feel if say oh i will be 'not married' when im like 40 or something how does that sound? Sounds weird to me. Besides that, most of the proofs that I have read from Shias claiming that Mutah is right are unclear and are vastly disagreed upon. Even using common sense being a third party, when I see a religion so conservative and pure like Islam I will never believe that their Lord will allow women to just be married for a term. For their virginity to be taken like this and then after a time that matrimonial bond with that person vanishes.
  20. Assalamu alaikom I am on mutah with my fiance, amd ofcourse my fathers permission was required in order for the mutah to be valid as I am still young. My father placed a condition that this mutah is for a mahramiya only and sexual intercouse is not allowed. However after few months of being in the mutah my fiance and I had sex. What is the ruling on this, is it considered haram ?
  21. Guest

    mutah and whatnot

    Hi everyone, as advised by my mom that I also need to seek for opinions of some shia communities online, here I am. Long story short, I left home few months ago to get married with the person I love. He is not a muslim (I know) and we did the interfaith marriage legally, got things done and we're legally husband and wife. Though during this process my parents (muslims) came to know about this and my father converted my man and did mutah, it was one year in the contract. During the conversion though, my man told my father that he is doing this for my sake, so we are not sinning and my parents have peace of mind. My father said yes it is okay but he said he wants my man to keep on learning and find out about islam. He said yes, he will. The promise was that we can't have sex, so it's fine for both of us. We accepted it and the contract started. Few months forward I came home for Eid and before that I've been promised by my parents that they will let me go back to be with my man. With this promise in hand, I trusted them, i went back home. Few days I am home, I found out that my father took my passport and he has been telling me to leave my man, he is also told by my father that he needs to leave me. I was upset because I said we were in contract and it is not even broken, we did not have sex and he has been learning. But father said that in one of his convo with him he said that he is not yet being convinced by the presence of god, hence atheist, and dad said because he is mentioning this, our marriage contract is broken and it is invalid. To be honest I find this unfair. He never mentioned that there is something other than having sex will break the contract. I dont even know that and he doesnt know that either. But my father has been using this and say I can't go back with him because he broke the contract which I find unfair. Not just me, but he too thinks so. I asked him why did he say that, he said he didnt know that it was not allowed. he said he was just telling my father that he is not yet convinced and asked him questions about islam at the same time. I would like to know whether he is doing right thing or he is not? Is it right that my contract is broken because of that? We both have no idea and dont know that there is something that can break the contract other than what has been promised. My father too took my passport without my consent and I feel like I am being kept.. Please let me know what you think I need some help.
  22. Salaam alaikum, I didn't want to be that guy and we already have a thousand mutah threads but I have an inquiry about mutah. I was re-reading Muta, Temporary Marriage in Islamic Law by Sachiko Murata and I came across this: What is meant by the woman having no right to sexual intercourse? Is it a legit view in our madhab, it jumped out at me as something that could easily be misunderstood. Can someone explain the context of this statement? https://www.al-islam.org/muta-temporary-marriage-in-islamic-law-sachiko-murata/statutes-muta ^Here's the page in its entirety.
  23. Salam, As we all know that mutah is eligible in Islam but why it seems that it doesn't exists. It is either a rare or not in people's priority. As this is the biggest issue for the youth that they can't seek help with what is allowed. I have seen many online activities regarding to Mutah that people has made many pages on fb but i don't think it has ever worked and also that mutah.com website which is a dead website. Can anyone please guide me that is there any source to have Mutah in Karachi?
  24. Salam, I am looking for help / advice on my current situation as I am a revert/convert to Islam . I hope someone can give me their point of view .. I met this guy one year ago, not long after i came to islam,but I still didn't know much about Islam, rules and regulation, traditions etc. In fact he spoke to me about Mutah temporary marriage which I had never heard before of, after he explained me what it was and showed me evidences for it I became convinced and we contracted a temporary marriage. After one month since we met, he left to go to study abroad, and just before leaving he proposed me to get married: if everything kept going well, we would get permanently married in the summer. Since then , until now, he only came back for one month in march , and then he left again . We have been temporarly married until now, with the intention to get permamently married, and in the meantime we have been in a proper relationship, we are in touch every day and I became like a part to his family which lives here, I have been introduced to all his famiy and friends as his "fianceé" In all this time we also had sexual instercourse many times (I was not virgin before converting to islam but since I did he's been the only one). However, when he came back in March, there have been few problems between us. I think this is due to the long period being distant , not knowing each others too well face to face , not being used to each other. When he left again, he decided that it would be better for us to wait and postpone the marriage and wedding. As I said he was meant to be back in the summer, and then marry me permanently. I think the problems we have are minor and still my intention is to marry him and I never changed my mind and as I understand his intention also still remain the same but he just wants to wait. I find it too hard to accept this, after he had already proposed me to get married in the summer ( also family and friends all knew about our plan of doing the wedding in the summer) and he still don't know when we will do the nikah and wedding. I feel like this is not too different from being girlfriend/ boyfriend as in my original european culture , which I left with the expectation of coming to Islam and have right and dignity as Wife. I hate being called his "fiancee" or "girlfriend" , and have to pretend in public that we are not married, while at home we even sleep together. I just feel I should get permanently married as soon as possible and I kinda regret having done all these things . He keep saying that I am a Wife islamically even with the temporary contract and that our intention is to get permanently married so it's all good and it's normal to stay like this .. and that i shouldn't worry about how other people call me . I know him for one year already and I don't know when we will marry... but inside I can't accept staying as this sort of girlfriend, I have tried to express my feelings to him but he just gets kinda angry and accuses me to have no faith or trust and of talking non sense. I would like to know what you think about this being muslims and in the culture since birth , and if you someone could give me any advice ... I was thinking to put conditions in mutah such as not having sexual relationship, even though it would be too late now , and i am quite sure he wouldnt like it at all and he would see it like some kind of "revenge" from me or trying to be distant so I really don't know what to do. Also he uses the excuse that in my original culture people get married after many years of knowing each others, but my culture is not who i am as i am muslim and I think and want to marry and live as a muslim. Thank you for reading !
  25. Surah Nisa ayat no 24, talk about the contractual marriage ie Mut'ah. So, when you have contracted temporary marriage [istimt'atum] with them, then give them their words [mehr; predefined contractual money]. There is no sin on you for whatever you agree to after this. Indeed, Allah is all Knowing, Wise. All those who are trying to demean Islam in the name of Mut'ah and at the same time asking Muslim to modernise; must check their double standards. Most of the religions are not anywhere close to providing such freedom to its women folk. Islam is the first religion in the world which accepted woman as a different entity of God rather than a property in male dominated world. Islam gives them freedom to choose their partners and also the right over their bodies. After more than 1400 years of Islam, modern world currently talks about these rights of woman which are enshrined in Islamic teachings. Islam provided men and women legal way of living together without any social stigma. Still debates are going on about live-in relationships in the world including in our own country. Islam is the religion which offered the freedom to have a live-in relationship more than 1400 years ago and the world is still not sure about it. Even then, so-called pseudo intellectuals constantly bash Islam over the rights of women. On one hand these champion of women's rights demand freedom for them, but on the other hand they claim that Nikah Mut'ah is nothing more than prostitution. Nikah Mut'ah is a system where you can live in society with a man without feeling guilty or facing bashing from society for your deeds that are applicable to both the genders. However, in prostitution, women are forced to provide the pleasure of their bodies to men. Some intellectuals believe that it was a system which was devised to fulfill the carnal desires of men who used to go on long expeditions and wars. That is a completely wrong notion attributed to Islam just like many others, and being said without carrying out any kind of research on the subject. Whatever they say is purely based on heresy and botched-up articles of ill-informed people. The system of temporary marriage was ordered keeping in mind the requirements of both genders. Further discussion on the topic will be done in next few articles. Thanks in advance to all the readers of merinews.com. for further reading plz click the below link http://www.merinews.com/article/nikah-mutah-temporary-marriage-in-islam-is-not-prostitution-instead-it-is-freedom-to-both-men--women/15924635.shtml Kindly put forward your own views, study, research on the subject matter.
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