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  1. I am young guy and my parents are old they wants me to marry as fast as possible, all my related people that I know have somehow a miserable marriage life. a man married to a woman who run away during a trip and she waste his money, I heard that she wanted to marry someone else but now she is changing after 15 years. another related a woman married a man who wastes his money, he is not educated well but he thinks that he is always right, and thinks that everyone else around him wants to harm him, he have self ego, he don't want her family to help him or his wife. Now I am afraid of getting married I don't a girl that don't try to understand and I don't want to make our life miserable because of money. my parents will choose the girl but I don't know really if they will choose the right one because they are on hurry and I know they will ask people about the family of the girl, if one persons says they are okay and all others says no they are not okay, they will consider to choose the girl because like I said they are on hurry and they are kind they think everyone is kind but the world is changing, people changing too.
  2. My father is ordering my mom to leave to another country in 2 weeks and they aren’t divorced. I told him what if my mom(his wife) doesn’t want to go(and she doesn’t want to go that early). He told me “ it doesn’t matter what she thinks, it’s whatever I say happens.” Does he have this kind of power? I know that a women is supposed to obey her husband. But I feel as if he’s being unreasonable. Can you please educate me on this subject.
  3. Guest

    Awrah

    Salam I want to know more about “awrah” of men and women. What determines what is awrah? Hadith? Quran? Only strong hadiths please and references too. Thank you!
  4. I want to ask, like I know gold is haram for men but I heard men can we only for a reason in an urgent situation of money during any journey or what? Like is it allow to wear little amount like everytime on finger, like is it allowed? Or not? Please briefly explain it. (ulama only)
  5. " Researchers from Essex and the University of Missouri used these factors to calculate BIGI scores for 134 nations, representing 6.8 billion people. Surprisingly their new measure found men are, on average, more disadvantaged than women in 91 countries compared with a relative disadvantage for women in 43 countries." I knew it lol https://www.essex.ac.uk/news/2019/01/03/new-measure-for-gender-inequality-suggests-many-disadvantages-for-men
  6. I am human, I make mistakes, therefore please correct my reasoning with references if possible, as I have separated from my partner over the matter of "displaying one's beauty", and perhaps I am wrong in my thought process. In the situation of a woman who does not observe hijab, but covers her body well; My reasoning: it is wrong to post your photos on social media where men are able to view your photo. Allah says in the quran do not display your beauty. You are a woman with beauty, you are posting a photo on social media, you are displaying yourself on social media, by posting on social media, it is an act of displaying yourself. I don't know how else I can say it. It is not the same as going to work. The thought here is "I am going to work". It is not the same as walking down the street to get somewhere and people see you, because the thought is "I am going to x place". When you post a photo, the thought is "I will post a picture of myself on instagram " in other words "I will display myself on instagram". You are therefore unnecessarily displaying your beauty to men. Even if the woman observes proper hijab, it is an act of "I will display myself on the internet by posting this photo"; it isn't a charity photo, a conference video, you giving a lecture, it's simply to share a "fun" or "precious" or "happy" moment with the people on social media (which includes male cousins, friends, strangers, etc.). Am I wrong in my thinking? Can someone explain it in a more articulate way rather than my caveman explanation?
  7. (bismillah) (salaam) I was hoping to get some advice on the topic of social hijab. I live in the UK. Before I explain my dilemma, I follow Sayed Sistani and I will give a brief summary of his rulings on this: 1. There is nothing wrong with talking to na-mahram out of necessity e.g. talking about work with opposite gender work colleagues, opposite gender doctors, cashiers, etc etc. 2. It is makruh to talk to na-mahram where its not necessary e.g. general chit chat with the opposite gender, laughing and joking with them, going out to cinema/restaurants with them 3. It is haram to talk to na-mahram to make them feel lust or if they make you feel lust or fall into any other type of sin. I work in a department of eight people, 6 are female and 3, including me, are male. This is how the seating plan is at work: male female female ------------------------------------------- (desks) female me female female female As you can see I sit in the centre amongst all female colleagues. We are all of similar age so like females of similar age they have become good friends and they talk about various things such as what they did on the weekend, their dating lives and so on. As you can see from the desk plan, I am in the middle of these conversations and can hear everything. The good thing is that they don't talk about anything inappropriate such as women stuff or backbiting and they are good people in that sense - just general stuff. My dilemma is that due to where I sit, I find myself getting drawn into the conversations with them that leads to joking around and laughter so something makruh under the marja that I follow and this is poking at my conscious and I am not sure what to do. I have tried different things such as I put on headphones and listen to lectures, nohas about ahlulbayt etc. so I can't hear what they say but also gives the impression I am busy and don't want to be disturbed and I even went through a phase where I kept my conversations strictly about work which worked but they thought something was wrong with me (lol). What do you guys think? A part of me feels we are social beings and what I am doing is normal. I don't hang out with them outside work hours. Other part of me is obviously aware of the rulings. I can keep my headphones in but all the time? Can I really expect myself to talk to them about nothing but work for the 8 hours or so I am at work? Also, are these general conversations necessary and fall under 1. in the marja rulings, in the sense that socialising is something necessary at work and harbours a healthy working relationship, meaning if I didn't do that, I would alienate myself. The good things is that I have established certain Islamic boundaries: - They accommodate my prayers and let me pray at work - Most of the females in my team are aware that contact with me it not allowed. Bless them, even when they accidentally tap my shoulder to get my attention or accidentally touch me in any way, they apologise! - They are happy with me not attending social events/work events where alcohol will be on the table I am sitting on Sorry this post is a bit unstructured, but given all the above, what do you guys think? I am leaning towards limiting it as much as possible so use the headphones (if you guys have other ideas and ways of limiting it let me know) and I even work home one a day a week which is helpful and generally try my best to uphold my marjas ruling. Some things I can definitely do is for example, not participate in work whatsapp convos etc ( we have two work whatsapp groups) cos thats not necessary and in my control, which I will look to stop. Other things I can't avoid e.g. next week I am travelling by car to a work meeting away from the office with a colleague so she will be in my car with me (just us two). I imagine this is makruh (being alone with na mahram) so is it possible to just talk about work and avoid general convo in an hour long journey? so I guess I should have just not offered her a lift and let her take the train? (its a fair distance to travel) but then would I come across rude and not courteous? Any advice appreciated Thanks, duas.
  8. Fascinating video about the statistics of attraction between the two sexes, with some rather interesting conclusions. He does, however, not consider the impact factors not relating to attraction have on divorce, relegating the phenomenon entirely to each sex's perception of the other's attractiveness. He also assumes that women's perception of their own attractiveness is the same as men's perception of it (which is the source of the data) when commenting on women 'settling'. Either way, quite an amusing watch!
  9. Aslamualaikum, i have tried my best to find an exact ruling about using hair systems for men who have lost their hair in a young age but i am unable to get a satisfactory and logical answer , now i heard and read that it is prohibited to use human hair extensions or wigs or toupees to be exact and it is ok to use the ones which are made of artificial hairs, i did not get that, i mean first of all the purpose i conquered behind forbidding the use of hair pieces or wigs is so that they can be used as a mean of deception but the case is totally different when a person has a real reason to wear toupees if he or she has lost his or her hair in a young age so guys help me out in clearing that confusion , can a person wear human hair made toupee or he is only allowed to wear the artificial ones, the Hadith upon which the ruling of not using human hair extensions is based describes pretty clearly that a girl lost her hair due to some disease and her mother wanted to use hair extensions on her ( hair from another person ) and Rasulallah (s.a.w.w) forbade her from doing so. so if human hairs are not allowed neither should be the artficial ones becuz they're pretty much the same in looks, only because they were not there at the time of Rasulullah (s.a.w.w) doesn't justifies them to be used. the Hadith i quoted i read from and heard of Ahl-usunnah's book, i want to know what is shia mazhab's take on this issue as inspite of trying my best i was unable to find the shia mazhab's take on this topic, another thing i wanna ask about is if the toupees are allowed then what is the ruling of performing ghusl / wudu wearing them as they are mostly attached to the scalp for a certain period of time and they are fixed for that particular time ( a couple of weeks or months etc), so does one require to remove them every time he is to perform ghusl or wudu( which is a difficult and painful task) or he can perform wudu and ghusl while wearing them and as they are attached with adhesives so there is a possibility that water would not go through such adhesives , by the way they say that these adhesives let water go through them but still what if it doesn't go through, will the ghusl and wudu be still valid ? i'll also translate this query briefly in urdu so that more users can review and answer that, kya hair replacement units / wigs lagana jayez hai ? kya insani balon wali wig istemal ki ja skti hai ? humaray han aksar logon k jawani mein sar k baal gir jatay hain aur muashra bhi esa hai humara k mazaq banaya jata hai to kya confidence restore krne k liye wig use ki ja skti hai aur kya ye wig insani balon se bani hui ho to bhi jayez hai ya k sirf artificial balon wali jayez hai ?aur agar esi toupees / wigs use krna jayez hai to ye zyada tar fix kr k lagai jati hain sarr pr ek khas time period k liye to us time period k douran wudu aur ghusl k kya ehkaam houngy ? kya har baar wigs ko utara jayega jo k kafi painful process hai ya k un k pehnay huye hee ghusl aur wudu anjaam dia ja skta hai is haal mein k ho skta hai k sar k kisi hisay tk pani touch na ho raha hou , please reply. JazakAllah
  10. I was sleeping during fast. unintentional Ihtilam happened during sleep, is my fast invalid?
  11. Salam, I was hoping to get some advice from the men out there who are attending university or work for long durations in the day. I am currently at university, for majority of the day (maybe 8 to 10 hours), which requires me to use the toilet (allot). However, they are public toilets and are usually quite dirty, so I usually urinate while standing up for convenience and cleanliness. Obviously, that is not permitted, and it's preventing me from performing prayer during the day, so I usually have to combine them when I reach home. Is there a solution to this? Keep in mind that cleaning the seat with water and toilet paper takes about 5 to 10 minutes which is largely impractical when you go to the toilet more than 6 to 8 times a day. Also, the closest most is a 5 minute walk so it is also a huge inconvenience to walk there every time. Please let me know if you've overcome this issue. Jazakum Allah Khear
  12. I was just addicted to masturbation. After getting rid of it, by mistake i masturbated yesterday. My question is: after doing this i wore clean clothes...without ghusl...so after ghusl can i wear the same clothes or the clothes are pak.???
  13. Salam everyone I have a question on the status of women in shia islam (Shia Ahadith books and Ahlulbayt books), I have heard some narrations related to Imam Ali that he said that women are dumb or something like that which I think he would never say. And there was a whole book which really degraded the women by using some ahadith of Imam Ali (a.s) like a girl should not raise her voice on his husband and should never object him. HAVE ANYONE OF YOU HEARD OF THIS, WHAT IS THE AUTHENTICITY OF THESE AHADITHS/ NARRATIONS ?
  14. I would like to know what should a Muslimah found homosexual text messages in her husband phone ,and she also found out that he engaged in homosexual activity .Do she confront him or should she talk to some one at the masjid about it? Or keep praying to Allah that he stop engaging in these Actives? Or ask Allah to forgive him for his sins and hope the marriage change
  15. SALAM!! In Quran it is said for men to provide food and clothing to your wife. For wives it is guided to always keep happy your husband and obey what he says to except for Haram. But what about giving love to your wives. Here by love I don't mean (intercourse), I mean to always make her feel that her husband is loyal to her and is very happy to have her. Is there any thing said in Quran to always love your wife other than just fulfilling her material needs?
  16. Fill this form I have to conduct a psychology research for my final exams. I need Orthodox religious people who follow traditional roles to fill up this form. It only takes about 5- 10 minutes at most. Be honest and answer the test according to how you really behave and what you believe in. Your identity isn't recorded so you can be sure nobody knows what you have answered. it is confidential. Thanks.
  17. Is It Permissible For A Man To Wear Earrings?
  18. Salam, I'm just wondering what the fatwa from Ayatullah Khamenei is regarding plucking ones eyebrows, I can't seem to find anything online. (By plucking I mean the stray hairs around and in between the eyebrows.) Jazarkallah.
  19. Salaam alaikum brothers and sisters! I had a question regarding the reasoning behind women standing behind men in prayers (for both married couples and in congregations). I am currently conducting research regarding the Symbolism of Salat for my symbolism class in the university. I was wondering the reasoning behind this positioning. I know from a logical standpoint it makes complete sense (I would never want to do sujood in front of man) but I want to know what is the Islamic reasoning. If possible include hadiths or any other form of justification. My professor is interested in the reasoning so I would like some evidence to support this. I wasn't sure if there are jurisdiction regarding this or hadiths. Thank you! Salaam
  20. Salaam alaikum ! (again) I have a recently converted friend, Al hamduillah, who has found Islam, and has been converted for a little over a month or so. She is a "feminist" who advocates for the equality of all and for women to choose their roles regardless of their gender. Therefore, I was recently speaking to her in a group chat with other sisters in which we were discussing how our husbands (she is unmarried) have domain over the majority of the affairs, and we were just talking about whether or not or husbands can decide how to dress. Needless to say she privately messaged me and said that she does not necessarily agree with that (men being the protectors and maintainers of their wives) and I found myself in a difficult discussion because while I believe we are asked by Allah swt to follow the roles He has established for us, I did not want to turn her away from Islam (because she is a pretty staunch feminist). So I was wondering if there was any way to appropriately tell her (I mean it is in the Quran after all) and I was also just wondering if she is permitted to not follow the prescribed gender roles. I know Allah swt has profound knowledge regarding His creations and so naturally He had given us roles which are naturally and easy for us to follow, and which provide a sound framework for life; however, I do not want her to think Islam is a religion in which women are oppressed by their husbands. Is a woman permitted to not prescribe to her mandated roles, or if she does not, will there be consequences? Both brothers and sisters are welcome to answer Thank you and salaam (:
  21. I started wearing hijab seven days ago and I have been getting more male attention than usual when away from my husband, and I don't know what to do. Naturally my husband is unhappy with the attention, and I'm concerned too. He thinks maybe I'm not conducting myself properly but my hair isn't showing, my arms aren't showing, my legs aren't showing, my neck isn't showing, I'm not wearing makeup, I'm not cussing, I'm not being obnoxious, and I'm not engaging strangers. I keep to myself when I'm by myself, and if anything my eyes are usually on my phone. I'm thinking about taking the scarf off and just dressing modestly, if its just going to get me all this attention. I dont know. Maybe I'm just not ready. Does anyone have any advice? Please help. This is really upsetting to me.
  22. (bismillah) Okay, I've been noticing a couple of things that have become quite common in the Muslim Community--in the East and the West. One makes me laugh because it's just super funny, and the other really grinds my gears. Let's start with something lighthearted. Ever been to the mall and suddenly this absolutely stunning woman just walks past you? She has enough perfume to asphyxiate a Komodo Dragon to death, her clothes makes Britney Spears look modest, the amount of make up on her face just makes you uncomfortable and her hair couldn't be more exposed. Yeah, that's happened to all of us but here's the ironic bit. Her parents are following her around--her mother is covered head to toe in a niqab and her father is wearing a long thobe with an imamah to top it all of. Both of them have an expression of such pride on their faces, as if the contrast between their modesty and their daughter's immodesty was a good thing. It's sort of sad, but it's also worth a chuckle. Now the part that's not so funny. Whenever I travel abroad and hit the beach, I sometimes see hijabis wearing the most uncomfortable clothes to protect their modesty(My Allah bless them) and then their husbands pop up wearing these super small shorts and super tight T-shirts. I mean seriously, what's that about? I always wear full pants, and loose T-shirts(it's not that bad, trust me) so I'm not being a hypocrite here. What annoys me is that it's okay for these men to boss their wives around and make them wear layer upon layer of black clothing in the middle of June and force them on to the beach and they themselves dress so immodestly. So woman must be perfectly Islamic but man can just put on his shorts and play volleyball in public because he is a man? I know Islam prohibits this kind of immodest behavior but many of us don't pay attention to these types of situations. Has this ever caught your attention? Does it bother you? How would you recommend going about remedying this problem? Salam. Shahreem.
  23. I am interested in knowing how women manipulate men, I can imagine how but I don't exactly know the method by which a women would/could manipulate a man and also how often do women try to use their gender specific ability to manipulate men? and How can a man be wary of this, what are the signs when a women tries to manipulate someone?
  24. I have read on Al-Islam that men cannot approach their wife naked, I think its makruh. Can you explain why this is? thank you
  25. This black guy was laying his hands on the shoulders of this Muslim women. I saw this after we all got out of the lecture theatre, I don't think the black guy knows that Muslim women don't like being touched by non mahram, especially by non Muslims, or I assume they don't. What are my obligations according to Islamic law? do I talk to any of them or just leave them alone?
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