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Assalamualaikum. I've been watching self-improvement content but not taking any action on it for a long time. I watch Hamza, Captain Sinbad, Tim Ferriss, Dan Koe, Alex Hormozi, Jordan Peterson and Chris Williamson. I've also read over 40 books on self-improvement, some of which suggested haram practices which I didn't engage in that would supposedly get me results in a particular pursuit. I've read books on relationships, quitting vices, psychology, fitness, habit formation, improving your mental health, making tough decisions and mental toughness. Mentally, I have gotten stronger from reading these books. I have a lot of discipline now outside of one or two haram vices that I'm trying to quit. I have been inspired by these content creators to pursue entrepreneurship and I've found philosophical wisdom that I can apply to any situation to maintain a positive outlook on life. I've became an optimist thanks to these videos, but I'm not being grateful to Allah. I watched a couple of videos today; one of them called Self-Improvement idolatry, the other claimed that it ruined his relationship with Allah. I could barely sit through both videos because I have a greater purpose with self-improvement, which is providing value to my family. It's providing value to my community. I wouldn't have found out how to without self-improvement, or is that a limiting belief because those videos have shown me how low my iman is? I don't believe that I can live a purposeful life without those books and videos. I feel addicted to self-improvement and that addiction has left me feeling kind of empty. I felt empty anyway. Did Allah lead me to Islam, or did self-improvement lead me there? I have no idea. You're arguing with something nebulous that most people can't see. I feel as though Islam promotes an external locus of control, meaning that it promotes giving in completely to circumstance. Admitting that improving your life is hopeless when you weren't the one that created yourself. You act as though you can create yourself, when it's Allah who created you and you're just trying to metaphorically draw yourself a new face. I'm scared of believing in Allah 100%, meaning that my last Shahadah was probably invalid inshallah. I don't want to give up my internal locus of control, my self-belief, unless there's a how to guide which gives convincing evidence by contrasting facts about mammals. I'm stuck in this dunya. Help.

HELP FROM OTHER THAN ALLAH? This debate, in the Shia community, is an unnecessarily controversial topic. You can find the description of this dilemma under various headings, the most famous of which is “Is saying Yā ʿAlī Madad allowed in Islam?” Is it shirk (association of partners with Allah), bidʿah (innovation in religion), mustaḥabb (recommended) or ḥarām (prohibited)? Many people resort to asking the Marājiʿ , seeking their fatāwā’ (jurisprudential ruling) on this matter. Some resort to their own whims and opinions, without caring or bothering to research, investigate, and peruse the Islamic literature on this matter. Among those who choose the more difficult of the three paths, i.e., to search for truth by investigation and research (taḥqīq), are two factions. First are those with confirmation bias who only set out to find proofs that fortify their claim, while ignoring or misinterpreting any evidence against their argument—these people are actually not looking for the truth, they have already made up their minds as to what the truth is, and won’t be convinced no matter how obvious and in their face the reality is. It is very hard for a person who is firmly rooted in a certain belief system to change his/her mindset, and if Allāh leaves them wandering in their rebellion, then not even the Prophet ﷺ can guide them. [7:186] The second group is constituted by actual skeptics who are willing to stand corrected when the argument presents itself in front of them, and strive to the best of their capability to remain logical and unbiased in their research. Āyatullāh Sayyid Kamāl al-Ḥaydarī said in one of his lectures: “When you or I read history, we seek to take what supports and establishes the correctness of our creed, sect, and religion, (i.e., what we already believe), however, if we put these biased glasses on, we will not reach the truth. Therefore, the search for truth must be more important than belonging to a sect or religion. Let the focus of your research be upon the truth. It may be that what you find is congruent with the religion you are convinced about, and it could also be that what you are convinced about is contrary to the truth. Akhbārī seeks to establish Akhbāriyyah, Uṣūlī seeks to establish Uṣūliyyah, philosophers seek to establish philosophy, ʿIrfāni seeks to establish ʿIrfān. If this is your focus, then rest assured you are not searching for the truth. Memorize this statement: ‘The search for truth is more important than belonging’—this is what we are calling for when we call towards logic (mantiq), i.e., we must find that you exhibit a logic geared toward the search for truth, not a logic which seeks to support whatever you are already upon.” WHERE TO SEARCH FOR THE TRUTH? The answer is clear-cut and straightforward. The Qur’ān should be any Muslim’s first point of reference whenever researching religion. The first question that should arise in a believer’s mind regarding Allāh’s decree or order is, “What does the Book of Allāh say?” George Tarabishi, a Syrian writer, has reportedly said that the reason why Muslims have become as debased and impotent as they have, is because they have left the Islām of the Qur’ān and accepted the Islām of ḥadīth. Regardless of what state the rest of the ummah­ is in, this notion most certainly holds true for the majority of the Twelver Shias today. The approach towards religion, for centuries, in the Shīʿī school of thought has been a traditional (ḥadīth-based) one. The practice of most turbaned scholars nowadays is to read the ḥadīth books, pick out traditions that support their cause, and feed them to the masses, without caring in the least to verify, at least, the chain of narrators first. How would they? Most are not even adept in ʿilm ar-rijāl (the study of people who transmitted/reported sayings from the holy Prophet ﷺ or the Imāms). Even if some of them do bother to verify the chain, they still fail on the second, and perhaps the most important step, which is to test the veridicality of the narration upon established principles from the verses of the holy Qur’ān. No matter how strong the chain of narrators is, if the narration opposes the Qur’ān, it should be thrown away, because whatever is from the Infallibles (عليه السلام) can never contradict the word of Allāh. In Mu’jam Rijāl al-Ḥadīth, Imām ʿAlī ar-Riḍā (عليه السلام) has confirmed the above methodology. However, most modern scholars have a converse approach: They study the corpus of narrations and subsequently read the Qur’ān, interpreting the verses according to the ḥadīth perspective. What they are doing is trying to make the Qur’ān comply with what they have already established from the narrations. Such a reading of the Book is close to fabricating lies against Allāh and His Messenger ﷺ. Then who is more unjust than [the one] who invents a lie about Allāh to mislead the people without knowledge? Indeed Allah does not guide the transgressors [6:144]. Hence, our methodology for this research will be primarily based upon clear (muḥkam) verses from the Qur’ān, and ḥadīth shall only be relied upon if it conforms to the Book. This is important because, the Qu’ān is “Furqān” or “Criterion” that separates truth from falsehood [2:185] [3:4] [25:1]. And truth has become distinct from error [2:256]. THE QUR’ĀN It’s harrowing how this explicit verse is still not enough to shatter the arguments that our fellow Shias come up with. Despite having memorized “You alone we worship and You alone we ask for help” [1:5] since childhood and hopefully reciting the verse at least 10 times a day in our daily prayers, it seems like we haven’t understood the message of it (and how clear a message it is!). The verse declares that worship is for Allāh alone—this is because of the use of the word “iyyāka”. If the verse said “We worship you” (as opposed to the usage of ‘only’ or ‘alone’), then the wording would have been different; Allāh could have revealed, “نَعْبُدُكَ وَ نَسْتَعِيْنُكَ”, which would translate to “We worship you and seek help from you.” But no! The word “إياك” has reserved the act of worship for Allah alone, without exception. This is clear to every believing Muslim, and is the fundamental pillar of Islām, i.e., tawḥīd. The rejection of other deities and gods as unworthy of worship is the very foundation of this monotheistic religion. But what most of us often choose to forget is that the same reservation and restriction is placed, without any distinction, to the act of seeking help. Both the phrases are separated only by a “و” (and). The import of the verse would have not changed had Allāh chosen to omit the second “إياك”, that means, the Qur’ān could have said, “You alone we worship and seek help from.” The meaning is not that different, is it? So, what is the need to add another “iyyāka” before “nastaʿīnu”? The reason is right in front of you. It is to put emphasis on the “You only/alone” part. “Seeking help” is very similar to the act of “worship” in the manner that both are reserved, by how this verse reads, for Allāh, and no one else. Here comes the layman Shia’s first question: “That seems illogical, how can it be said that “seeking/asking for help” is reserved for Allāh alone? Do we not seek help from other human beings like family, friends, doctors, teachers, strangers, and so on? Are we then flouting and violating an Islamic law by seeking help from the creation of Allāh, while it is reserved for the Creator alone?” This question is insincere, and only asked by those who want to defend their practice of saying “Yā ʿAlī madad” or “Yā Ḥusayn madad” to the very last breath. The answer to this question is very simple, “Asking for help from anyone who is alive and present in front of you is allowed and unproblematic, but seeking assistance from someone who is behind the curtain of ghayb is prohibited, because ghaybī assistance is from Allāh alone.” A counter that opponents of this argument often come up with is, “But the Prophet (S) and his Ahlulbayt (عليه السلام) are all alive, just like those killed in the way of Allāh (martyrs/shuhadā’). Doesn’t the Qur’ān say, “Do not call those slain in Allah’s way ‘dead’. No, they are living, but you are not aware. [2:154] …they are alive with their Lord, receiving provision [3:169]”?” First of all, most scholars opine that this realm of existence or state of living is not the same as ours, but it is barzakh. This will be confirmed if you refer to Tafsīr al-Mīzān for the above verses. Secondly, the verse still doesn’t legitimize or vindicate seeking help from martyrs because of the simple fact that even if alive, they are not present in front of us, but are on the other side of the curtain of ghayb, and therefore, seeking help from them would be disobedience in light of the verses of the Qur’ān. Moreover, they themselves are dependent on Allāh for their provision. In sūrah al-Baqarah, Allāh says, “And seek help through patience and prayer. And indeed, it is difficult except for the humble ones—who are certain they will meet their Lord and they will return to him.” [2:45-46] A very similar verse is found later on in the same sūrah: The phrase “ٱستعينواْ بٱالصبر وٱلصلوة” appears in both the verses. Patience and prayer are listed as the means or methods of seeking help. The verb for help is “astaʿīnu”—same as the one in sūrah al-Fātiḥah. In verse 153, Allāh is explicitly addressing “those who believe”, however, in the verse 45, Allāh is addressing Banī Isrā’īl (The Children of Israel). From the context of both verses, it can be understood that the teaching is not specific to Children of Israel, but even if someone ignorant enough does come up with the objection, the latter verse (153) clarifies the matter. Verse 45 is just a continuation of Allāh’s commandments to Banī Isrā’īl that begin from verse 40, which includes upholding covenants, believing in Allāh’s revelations, establishing and bowing down in prayer, paying the charity (zakāh), etc. The succeeding verses are also addressed to the same nation. A believer’s prayer is established when his niyyah (intention) is khāliṣ (pure), that is, to seek nearness to Allāh, his Lord and Sustainer (qurbatan ilallāh). Allāh continues, “and it is difficult except for the humble ones”—“it” refers to the act of prayer or “ṣalāh”. Clearly, prayer is the ultimate representation of complete submission to one’s Lord, when one bows down and then prostrates to Him, he admits his weakness to his Lord, who is the Almighty and All-Powerful. The believer is always in need of help from his rabb. Prayer is where a believer is humbled, as Allāh says in sūrah al-Mu’minūn, “Certainly the believers will have succeeded. Those who are humble in their prayer” [23:1-2]. Allāh repudiates those who are negligent of prayer and do good deeds only to show off: “So woe to those who pray [but] are heedless of their prayer. Those who make a show of their deeds.” [107:4-6] It is clear how humbly standing in prayer in front of Allāh is one of the best ways to seek help from Allāh. The second way mentioned in the verses is through “patience”. Patience is an exemplary trait in a human being that makes any hardship possible to overcome. It would seem that the believers, by being patient, have helped themselves, out of their own ability, but that is where verse 153 corrects you, “Indeed Allah is with those who are patient”—so even when the believers are being patient in the face of hardships, Allāh is with them. This confirms that the source of help is Allāh alone, in all cases! It could be said that on the basis of these verses that ṣabr and ṣalāh are two “wasā’il” of receiving divine assistance and support. The import of these verses is crystal even from a superficial reading, and does not need much clarification, as the meaning is not of an esoteric or arcane nature. However, just to supplement our argument, let’s take a narration from al-Kāfī, as mentioned in al-Mīzan fī Tafsīr al-Qur’ān by ʿAllāmah Ṭabāṭabā’ī: Imām aṣ-Ṣādiq said: “Whenever ʿAlī ((عليه السلام).) faced a difficulty, he used to stand up for the prayer and then recite this verse…” and also, “When a man is confronted by a hard misfortune, he should fast. Surely Allāh says: and seek help through patience, that is, fast.” Here, the Imām ((عليه السلام).) has interpreted ṣabr as “fast” or “ṣawm”. The tafsīr mentioned in this ḥadīth does not contradict the matn of the Qur’ān because fasting certainly requires a lot of patience. Hence, a wasīlah of seeking recourse other than prayer is fasting. Verse 46 says that the humble ones are “those who are certain that they will meet their Lord and return to him.”—this clause is important, as we’ll explain next: The translation of the above verses of the same chapter 2, al-Baqarah, [2:155-157] is: “And We will surely test you with something of fear and hunger and a loss of wealth and lives and fruits, and give good tidings to the patient, who, when disaster strikes them, say, “Indeed we belong to Allāh and indeed to Him we will return. Those are the ones upon whom are blessings from their Lord and mercy and it is those who are rightly guided.” These verses tie up beautifully with [1:5], [2:45], and [2:153]. In al-Fātiḥah, we are taught to ask Allāh for help, and what help did we ask Him for?—“Guide us to the straight path” [1:6]. We’re asking for “guidance”. Allah’s guidance is to be found in His Book, which is a guidance for the godwary [2:3]. He ((سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى).) taught us to seek recourse through praying and observing patience (or fasting, acc. to tradition) in verses 45 and 153, where he also said, “إن الله مع الصابرين“. In the verses under discussion, He (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) has detailed who the الصابرين are. He (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) says that the believers will be tested with fear, hunger, monetary loss, death, fruits, etc. but also instructs his Prophet ﷺ to bear good news for the “patient” ones. What are the characteristics of those people? They patiently remember their Lord in times of affliction and calamity, remembering that their return is to Allāh, therefore the calamities of this world are trivial compared to those of the Hereafter. It is this remembrance of the day of Judgment that helps them stay patient in the face of adversity, because they are certain they will meet their Lord [2:46]. Such are the people who are helped by Allāh, and upon whom are blessings from their Lord [2:157]. There you have the guidance you asked for in al-Fātiḥah! Hence, is is those who are rightly guided. The 62nd verse of Surah An-Naml (27) is a cogent argument for all believers who exercise their reason. It is a rhetorical question or challenge to people who invoke or call upon anyone besides Allāh from among his creation. The translation is: Who answers the distressed when he calls Him and removes evil and appoints you as inheritors of the earth? Is there a god with Allāh? Little do you remember! If anyone other than Allāh could possibly answer you and remove your distress, then would not this challenge of Allāh become pointless (astaghfirullāh!)? Imām ʿAlī (عليه السلام) and Rasūlullāh ﷺ are clearly separate from Allāh and are His creations. They are not gods, that is true, and no Shīʿī believes that. All of the anbiya’ and ‘awliyā are His righteous servants whose only purpose is to guide us to the right path. They do not have a share in Allāh’s creation or might. They do not control the atoms of the universe. Therefore, when you call upon them in times of need, you are actually countering Allāh’s argument in the above verse. To boil it down for the layman in simple terms, what you are implying is: “Yes, O’ Allāh, apart from You, there are some creations of Yours who can answer us when we call them, and can remove our adversities, difficulties and problems.” Allāh: “Is there a God with Allāh?” You: “No, my Lord, they are not gods, but You have created them and appointed them as intermediaries. They can only hear our call and respond to us with Your permission. They are not indepentent of You, rather they are a wasīlah to You!” This is the typical Shīʿah argument, which is, unfortunately, often even put forward by pseudo-scholars who occupy the pulpit and address majālis consisting of hundreds and thousands of laymen who only know how to applaud the “mawlānā” or “dhākir” no matter what ghuluww or kurf they may be insinuating. Allāh answers this first in Sūrah al-Isrā’: Verses 56-57: Say: “Invoke those whom you claim besides Him, for they neither have power to remove your adversity nor bring change. They (themselves) are those who call and seek means to their Lord, whoever is nearer, expecting His mercy and fearing His punishment. Indeed your Lord’s punishment is to beware of. Lo! You were claiming that the prophets and Imāms have been given power by Allāh to hear you (even when they are in ghayb or deceased) but Allāh refuted you and negated your argument. If this verse talked about idols, then verse 57 would be meaningless because idols do not call upon Allāh or seek wasīlah to Him, or seek His nearness or fear His punishment. Therfore, it is proven that those whom “you claim besides Him” are clearly living creatures who pray to their Lord and fear His punishment. Was this not the exemplary behavior of all the prophets, Imāms and His righteous servants? You claimed that the prophets and Imāms themselves are a wasīlah to Allāh! That is why you were calling them. The argument you put forward is that you call upon these servants of Allāh because they are nearer to their Lord and therefore, will intercede for you in your supplications. But what did Allāh say? Read the āyāt again. "لا يملكون" means no power/control. Allāh again refutes the same argument in Sūrah Fāṭir: And those whom you call besides Him do not control even as much as the husk of a date stone. If you call them, they do not hear your call, and if they heard they would not respond to you. And on the day of qiyāmah will deny your shirk [35:13-14] The translation is clear. Those whom you invoke are creations who have not been given a share in Allāh’s power to control anything, they are nothing but dependent servants of Allāh. They can not even control a thing as small and insignificant as the husk of a date-seed, so how can they solve your problems? This verse, again, is not talking about the idols worshipped by idolaters, because of the words, “and if they heard, they would not respond to you”—we all know idols can not hear in the first place, so there was no need for Allāh to say “and if they heard”. Neither are idols conscious, sentient, speaking entities who possess intellect. That is why, it is only fitting that those who, on the day of qiyāmah will deny your shirk are righteous servants of Allāh, like the awliyā’, the angels or the prophets. Verse [27:62] when talking about calling Allāh, used the phrase: “Is there a god with Allāh” and this verse says “will deny your shirk”—hold on! But we never worshipped the Imāms or considered them to be gods, we only called upon them to help us—that is what the layman says. However, in Allāh’s eyes, this is shirk. Say: “Have you not considered your partners whom you call besides Allāh. Show me what have they created from the earth. Do they have partnership (with Him) in the heavens or have we given them a book so they are on evidence from it? No, rather the wrongdoers promise one another nothing but delusion.” [35:40] Are Imāms the creators? (naʿūdhubillāh) No! Are they Allāh’s partners in the skies/heavens? No! Have they been given a book containing evidence that you can call upon them? No! This is how the āyah can be applied to our current belief. The istighāthā defendant replies: “But the Prophet ﷺ was given a book. In fact, it is the very book you are quoting from, Allāh’s last and best book, the Qur’ān! So we can call upon him, right?” This is illogical. Yes, the Prophet ﷺ has been given a book, but is there any “evidence from it” that he ﷺ can answer your supplication? Do not take one part of the verse and ignore the other. In fact, Allāh says to His Rasūl ﷺ: Say: I have no power to harm or benefit myself, except as God wills [10:49] Say, “I have no control over any benefit or harm to myself, except as God wills. Had I known the future, I would have acquired much good, and no harm would have touched me. I am only a warner, and a herald of good news to a people who believe.” [7:188] If God touches you with adversity, none can remove it except He. And if He touches you with good—He is Capable of everything. [6:17] Do you not know that to Allah belongs the kingdom of the heavens and the earth? And besides Allah, you do not have any guardian or helper. [2:107] Allāh strengthens whomever He wishes with His help. There is indeed a moral in that for those who have insight. [3:13] Indeed, Allāh is your Master, and He is the best of helpers [3:150] If Allāh helps you, no one can overcome you, but if He forsakes you, who will help you after Him? So in Allāh let all the faithful put their trust. [3:160] A similar argument is also found in Sūrah al-Aḥqāf: Say, ‘Tell me about those you invoke besides Allah. Show me what [part] of the earth have they created. Do they have any share in the heavens? Bring me a scripture [revealed] before this, or some vestige of [divine] knowledge, if you are truthful.’ (4) Who is more astray than him who invokes besides Allah such [entities] as would not respond to him until the Day of Resurrection, and who are oblivious of their invocation? [46:4-5] And your Lord says, “Call upon me, I will respond to you.” Indeed those who disdain my worship will enter Hell contemptible. [40:60] Allāh uses the word “ادعوني”, which means “call upon me”. But then, He (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) moves on to say “عبادتي”—what does this mean? Clearly, invocation or supplication is, in fact, prayer. The root word of ادعوني is دعا, which carries the meaning of calling, supplicating, praying, and invoking. Those who refrain from calling Allāh are disdainful of his worship, and will be forced to enter Hell, in a disgraceful, shameful state. That is what Allāh is saying. O’ mankind! Will you still call His servants instead of Him?! And when my servant asks about me, then indeed I am near. I answer the call of the supplicant when he calls upon Me. So let them respond to me and believe in me so that they may be rightly guided. [2:186] And We are nearer to him (man) than his jugular vein. [50:16] After all this exhortation from Allāh to his servants to call upon Him, would you still shy away from invoking him? Under the tafsīr of verse 2:186, ʿAllāmah Ṭabāṭabā’ī has quoted the following ḥadīth: Imām aṣ-Ṣādiq narrates from the Prophet ﷺ: “Allāh informed one of his prophets in a revelation: ‘By My Power and dignity! Verily, I shall change into despair the hope of everyone who hoped from other than Me, and I shall dress him with the clothing of disgrace before people, and I shall remove him from My relief and bounty. Does my servant put his hope in other than Me in hardships, while hardships are in My hand? And does he expect anything from other than Me, while I am the Self-sufficient, the Munificent? In My hand are the keys of the doors, while they are closed; and My door is open for the one who calls on Me.’” The Prophet ﷺ also said: “Allah said: “No creature seeks refuge in another creature, leaving Me, but that I cut off all the means in the heavens and the earth for him. Then if he asks from Me, I do not give him ; and if he calls on Me, I do not answer him. And no creature seeks refuge in Me, leaving My creatures, but that I make the heaven and the earth responsible for his sustenance; then if he calls on Me, I answer him and, if he seeks pardon from Me, I forgive!”” [Source: Al-Mīzān fī Tafsīr al-Qur’ān, where the author quotes from ʿUddatud Dāʿī] ________________________________________________________________________________________________________________ Despite these clear-cut verses from the Book of Allāh, people still try to argue in favor of istighāthā by quoting Nādi ʿAlī or Duʿā Tawassul. Nādi ʿAlī is not a duʿā, it is a poem. It is not from the A’immah (عليه السلام) of Ahlulbayt. It was never in the primary ḥadīth sources, only somehow appeared in later works. Duʿā Tawassul is also not from any of the Imāms, it was only found by ʿAllāmah Majlisī in an old manuscript that he thought was from Shaykh aṣ-Ṣadūq (who lived 700 years before Majlisī) and it was written on the paper that it was from the Imāms but did not even mention which of the Imāms. It does not have a sanad or “chain of transmission”. Hence, it is considered ḍaʿīf or weak. For verification of this claim, refer to this article published by Shia Reformist. These were likely the fabrications of the exaggerators (ghulāt). Imām ar-Riḍā (عليه السلام). in Rijāl al-Kashī has cursed the exaggerators (i.e., those who did ghuluww; esp. those that used to fabricate narrations and attribute them to the Imāms). In the same narration, he ((عليه السلام).) also said that whatever contradicts the Qur’ān can not be from the Ahlulbayt. Same is corroborated by many narrations in Uṣūl Al-Kāfī, from Imām Jaʿfar aṣ-Ṣādiq (عليه السلام). Authored by: Muḥammad Qā’im Ḥusayn

Hi, I'd like some advice on a topic that is concerning me a lot currently. I've met a man, he is pakistani (shia) and I am Iranian (shia). When we first met I brought up the differences in our culture/ethnicity and he let me know that his family would be fine with it as long as I'm a good muslim. Now he has told his parents and his mother has made a full 180 and is refusing to meet with me because I'm not Pakistani. This has given me a lot of grief as I can't do anything about it, I feel like I've not been given a chance. His father and sister are talking to the mother trying to convince her to at least see me in person, and he is going to do so also, but I am getting a feeling that it might be a challenge. Is there any way to get support in this? Islamically there is nothing wrong with us getting married, it's just cultural divides, and it would be great to hear from someone with similar problems.... Thank you.

Salaam, I'm a revert and a first time mum. My toddler is almost 2 years old now and has since 9 months had a really hard time with teething. They won't take a dummy or anything, as I breastfeed. Since the teething has gotten worse and we're on to our final teeth coming out, my toddler wont stop 'self soothing' to relax when they are in any discomfort, whether they're tired, teething or stressed. It's starting to get our of hand and happens when we visit relatives, the humping happens on the floor mainly or bed. I know western sources all say its natural and a normal part of development, but for me I'd like to stop this behaviour and would appreciate any advice from parents thats may have encountered a similar problem. How do I stop my child from doing this? I've tried distractions and everything I just don't know how to stop this. Thanks

Salam alaikum,i wanted to ask if online friends are haram.Like i added her on accident actually, but now me and her are friends(I'm a girl).i only told her my name and i didn't tell her my age/what school i go to/where i live specifically.We just talk about life and problems and cats.I still pray regularly and it does not take me away from Allah bc if it would,i would'nt be friends with her.Please answer i really need to know.

Salam alaikum! I Have a question.soo like some years ago I was a kid (no puberty) and made LOTS of TikTok accounts,Not only,is making tiktoks about private life Haram,i made some accounts where there were bad enough tiktoks but this one account,i copied someone off,someone that had Haram stuff.I literally have all of the account names but I CANT get into them.i heard i can still get bad deeds after death if I don't delete them?What do I do?????Please answer.

Salam alaikum!I've had a weird dream and I want to know the meaning of it. The dream:It was like I had a school project about our religions and while I was making it ,I didn't know something so I went down the road and there were like homes that had different religions written on it(you go inside the home and ask something about the religion.)Ofcourse I wanted to go to the home with islam written on it because I'm a muslim.BUT the home was closed. asked the imam or the guy that was in there why it was closed and then I didn't remember what he said.i went back to my school project. Is it negative ,positive something??help please tell me what it means!!

﷽ Salamunalaikum, Ya Ali adrikni.. Hope everyone who's reading this is doing just fine (Insha'Allah). My name is Hasnain. I am here coz i don't have the faintest idea as to what I am supposed to do with my life... I am in desperate need of help/guidance/advice.. a lot of it. I wanna apologize ahead of time if i come off as a little arrogant, rude, childish and immature.. I really don't want to sound offensive and sorry if this post is going to be a very long one. Before I start sharing my thoughts I would like to say a few things first like I am aware and fully prepared for any kind of response I might get on this also some of you might think of me as a stupid/lazy bum or even criticize me like I am an entitled or privileged person or maybe weird etc., but honestly any of it wont matter coz somewhere deep down I do believe that i deserve stern criticism and wont try to play a victim card I'll gladly welcome any brutal/bitter advice from you brothers as this is the truth and reality. Anyway mincing no words... I am gonna be 30 yrs old in the next couple of months. I have completed my masters and yet I am unemployed. Yup you've read that right I AM still JOBLESS. Not that I am a differently abled person, its mainly because of my anxiety and depression issues. I once was a normal, happy and contented person but some terrible things happened a few years back which made me into what I am today. I've been having episodes lately which I don't feel confident enough to share publicly.. I don't know how to put what I feel in words I just don't know what to do in life, there's this void in me and nothing can seem to fill it. I don't have any sort of phobias for your info Alhamdulillah and also I don't have suicidal thoughts as am aware that its haram and the end result is hellfire and Allah's anger. I Love Ahlebait (عليه السلام) and I pray everyday without any excuse or delay I offer tahajjud prayers as well and I have been actively reciting the Holy Quran and all/various duas and ziarats like Dua e tawassul, dua noor, adila, nudba, kumail, ziyarat ashura, arbaeen, warisa etc. for the fulfilment of desires and rizq.. However, I rarely go out to attend Majalis in the month of muharram and most of the time I watch it on T.V or my device..... I know that I am a sinner and I have sinned heavily in my life but i also do Istighfar abundantly and out of love and fear of almighty.. I cry every night lying on my bed cursing and accusing myself and blaming myself for my amaals not being accepted coz of my past deeds/actions.. never have I ever in my entire life indulged myself in haram activities like smoking, drinking, gambling, womanizing never I swear... I know that no ones perfect or blessed not even me and I even understand that luck has no role in our lives its all based on our efforts & hard work... but I don't know why I cant go out and find some work or get a job.. there's this fear in me that has put me in shackles.. I am concerned that this might be a underlying sickness or some kind of phobia which has cost me a great deal.. all this pressure and stress has been eating me up on the inside.. I lack motivation and I roam aimlessly i am not sure what to do with my career I think this is the end of it.. I DONT even HAVE ANY FRIENDS.. I did have a few in the past but they too left maybe coz I am a worthless guy and they did the right thing I mean who would wanna be friends with someone like me who has panic attacks, depression, anxiety and no future no special talents or set of skills no WORK no social life.. I never leave home I have confined myself behind the walls I never attend events or parties due to my condition.. I feel tired and restless most of the time.. I often go on without drinking water and I don't feel like consuming meals all day as my appetite is mostly lost due to overthinking and freaking out... Many times I go without sleep staying wide awake on my bed lying motionless.. I have no physical activity and I have headaches and I take random medications painkillers for it to subside and rest of the time everything looks bleak and my vision gets blurry I just cant cope with anything.. I have tried some breathing and meditation methods in the past but all in vain now I have started to believe I am on the verge of impending doom... I am devastated, nothing makes sense to me anymore, I have no one to guide me or help me and I am really really scared of seeking professional help (i am afraid of shrinks).. I never wanted to say any of this I just share all this with my Imams (عليه السلام) and Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) One Major attribution for my current circumstance I believe is that as a child I was always in trauma thanks to my dad... He was an abusive parent he'd hit me or my mom every time he had the chance.. he always blamed us for all the bad things that have happened in his life even for those things which occurred long before his marriage.. my mum was an angel she was super supportive she even took all the beatings just to save me from that monster :'( I am sorry I cannot and don't want to continue further as my eyes tear up every time I recall all those atrocities.. I know this is also a sin and may be recorded as gheebat.. I beg to Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) to do us justice and decide for him and all the oppressors on the day of judgement as he (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) knows best and he is the one who can punish them its not up to us as we are merely one of his feeble creation.. I just needed to vent as I am alone in this world I have no one to talk to anymore.. that is why I have tried and mustered up some courage to at least share it here with my Shia brothers.. its okay if no one replies to this I know that I sound weak, miserable and crazy but one thing I know for a fact is that I am not a liar and all of this isn't some kind of made up story my pain is not a lie... I don't need anybody's sympathy or anyone to feel pity for me coz I know that the world owes me nothing :'( I ask for forgiveness from my god and from you all if I have offended anyone among you.. I just want all my troubles to go away and be at ease as soon as possible is all.. as I feel I might be running out of patience and time I don't wanna die empty handed and with sadness by the side of my bed when I am alone in my old age I don't wanna be that person not at any cost I wanna do something meaningful and achieve all my goals but I don't have the courage and right mindset for it. So plz tell me what best options do I have? what should I do? what am I not seeing what is missing from me? I need answers I need resolution. How do I fight my inner demons? how do I come out of this never ending nightmare and this darkness engulfing me? how do I cross the bridge heck or build it in the first place?? please answer me.. someone? anyone??! Please excuse my English its going sideways as I am out of practice coz u probably know why I hope u guys understand what I meant to express. Thank you for your time and patience and also I appreciate all your help and valuable advice Also i wish that the Administrators or mods approve my post to come up on SC and wont delete it (fingers crossed). plz plz plz pretty plz if not anything just pray for me or at least just try n remember me in your duas I am literally begging you all :'( May Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) Hasten the reappearance of Imam Zamana (عجّل الله تعالى فرجه الشريف) Jazak'Allahu Khairan Khuda Hafez.

Salaams All, I am a 25 year old girl, and I lost my dad on the 9th of June 2017. My Dad's death happened at home, His head on my lap, His hand in mine. His final moments with me. It has been so long, I have tried various amaal, various suras, but I still can not take the scene out of my head, nor can I accept the fact, that my dad is no more. I can not sleep, cannot eat. and I cry most of the time. Can anyone advice me what to do? How to stop from hurting?

I'm in a very tough situation right now. I made dua and prayed a lot that Allah would give me satisfactory grades in my exams, to the point I cried and begged Him. However, the results didnt turn out to be that great. Does anyone know why this is happening to me? Why is Allah not answering my prayer despite me desperately wanting His help?

Anyone got advice on how to fight sexual desires it’s like I’m having a constant battle with the urge and if two people a pulling on a rope sometimes one side pulls harder than the other opposing it >———< desires when I think about Allah I stop then 15 secs later I’m fighting it again then I stop then 10 sec later I’m fighting constantly.

Salaam alaikum, the title is self-explainatory, I'm not quite sure how to approach jealousy in an Islamic manner. I do not know why this relative is jealous of me; I'm handicapped and getting help is a necessity. I don't consider the help I receive as "luxurious" or something to be jealous of, so I am at a loss as to how to deal with it. I know this is vaguely written, but the situation is really mind-boggling and has been brewing over the past few years. Do I ignore this person or do I say something? It seems when I try to communicate with the relative, I almost instantly regret that I ever bothered trying to talk to them. Again, I don't understand the jealousy, I don't find it flattering or endearing; It's just sad and disturbing.

Asalamalikum, I know this isn't a therapy website, but I just want to know if this happens to anyone else? I have these weird thoughts/voices in my head that are not nice. I don't like them, and sometimes I feel suicidal and I roll up in a ball and cry. I don't like to explain what exactly happens inside my head because I don't like thinking about. But basically it's nothing nasty or dirty. It's all about God and other religious stuff. Just imagine literally hearing the Shaytan talking to you, and telling you bad stuff about God..and etc.. The thoughts or voices don't tell me to do anything bad, just bad stuff about my creator. These weird things cause me to sometimes pray faster to keep my mind just moving, sometimes I have to sleep with The Quran hugged to my chest. I mean they aren't nice. I have no doubt in Allah, his messenger, Islam, or Ahulbayet. Of course I am always sending my sallam to The Holy Prophet and HIs Pure Family. And always saying "asgafurallah rabi" or "a'thubilAllah min alshaydan rajam" Literally ALL the time. It gets annoying because I wish to say these for the sake of remembering Allah. But no, I have to say them because to get these thoughts out of my mind, which half the time doesn't work. My mom wants me to see a therapist but I don't want to. Does this happen to anyone else?I always fear Allah will hate me, or I will go to hell. I don't know what to do? What in the world could it be?My biggest fear which causes me to sometimes commit self harm, cry, etc.,is the fact that Allah might not forgive me, that he hates me because of these thoughts or voices. (I can't tell the difference) Thanks so much for taking the time to read and answer. May Allah Bless you all Duniya w Akira.

Salam Alaykoum, I have some weird superstitions and I am not sure if it is because of ADHD or other reason. Can someone help me? I will put my question all the way at the bottom. I am left footed so before a soccer game or before anything I have to enter with my left foot, I have to wear the shoes starting with my left foot, shorts left foot first, shirt left hand first, etc. I also like to do everything on odd numbers so like how many times I say Bismillah when entering the field has to be either 1,3,5,7,etc, if I don't I feel weird and it makes me thing that I will play bad, even when using the restroom I have to use odd numbers of toilet papers. Even when playing in the field I try to avoid stepping on the lines it makes me feel weird. If something good happened to me or if I had a good soccer game then the next day or next game day I would do everything I did the that certain day, like what I eat, drink, how I step in the field, how I stretch, etc. There is also many things similar to this that I do but it will take a long time to mention all. What do you guys think the cause of this is? How does this effect me? Does it really have an impact on my life? How can I stop these superstitions?

Salam everybody. I have 2 requests. My first request is more personal and it is help for verifying the word counts I have read and seen. I cannot rely on testimony of people and want to see these amazing word counts for myself so that I can become a true witness to the miraculous nature of the Quran. I can sit down and count with a counter but this would take way too long and is prone to many mistakes unless I get a number close to the expected number. My second request is for help and a collection of a team of mathematicians on here who want to explore the mathematics of the Quran on a deeper level and possibly find new discoveries rather than using the Quran to confirm facts that are already known as we often do with the scientific miracles. I was wondering for a while why the Quran is so focused with prime numbers like 19 and I am starting to think it might be worth giving the unsolved Riemann Hypothesis an attempt using any light the Quran might shed on prime numbers. It is worth trying because to quote an over-used line by mathematicians, “Anyone who solves the Riemann Hypothesis will win immortality”, which I am paraphrasing. It means this problem is so huge and important that your name won’t be forgotten in history. It also has a $1 million prize but that’s not as important as people finding out we used the Quran to solve it! It might not work, but it is worth and deserving of a try at the very least.

There is this saying of one of the Infallibles (عليه السلام) that goes along the lines of A problem that makes you lose to Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) is a trial. A problem that pulls you away from Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) is a curse (Azaab). What is the exact saying? Any sources and exact attributions? I've been looking around for this and haven't been able to find much and would be very grateful for any help. JazakAllah

Rumour has it that Witchcraft do prevent prayers from being answered. Living in an environment where witch craft is prevalent. How do one ultimately protect or curre self from witchcraft influence?

Salam o alaikum people, this is my story, and I need urgent help. I am a boy, a boy who was not a firm follower of Islam, but after watching some documentaries on Ayatollah Behjat, I decided to transform myself to a better human and decided not to sin for forty days. And believe me a person who never prayed salat, was now performing nafils along with tahajjud every night without commiting any sin (in my opinion). Till 28 days passed, I felt my spirituality going up to a new level, I never experienced before. But, on the 29 day, a very satanic thought regarding Ahlebait (عليه السلام) came to my mind which I could not stop and due to those thoughts due to depression I was not able to perform any good deeds because whenever I tried to go to a mosque or a majlis, I would experience these satanic thoughts, and from two years from that date, I am still suffering from that obsessed thought. Please help me, I am very worried about losing my faith and my love to Ahlebait (عليه السلام). My mental situations matches the one written in this link: https://www.shiachat.com/forum/topic/235055158-religious-obsessive-compulsive-disorder/ For God sake please help me.

Guys I have a haja that my family has been working for for the past 4 years. I need prayers from all of you good people. my system in devastated and worn out from thinking about it. sometime my stomach pains me when I think about it. Please pray for my dear mother because she practically broke her back trying to get us this haja and there's a chance that we lose this haja while there's a chance we will get it. Please I need all the prayers I can get. its stressed me and my family out so much we practically read dua al tawasul everyday hoping for this haja to complete. If this haja completes I will take a very very VERY long Sajida of thanks to Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى). Wasalam.

Bismillah i Rahman i Raheem Assalaam o 'Alaikum Wa Rahmatullah i Wa Barakaatuh I recall listening to a Majlis where the speaker mentioned the story of Prophet 'Isma'il (عليه السلام), but not the son of Prophet Ibrahim (عليه السلام), rather another prophet with the same name. The story goes that the people he preached to put him through severe suffering (of which I will not go in the details here unless asked to) and an angel descended and asked him if he would like to curse these people. The Prophet 'Isma'il (عليه السلام) replied that he does not want that, and instead just wants his name to be among the names of the martyrs of Karbala. Recently, I tried to find out who this Prophet was, and I think he might be Prophet 'Isma'il (Sadiq al-wa'd) (عليه السلام), he was listed separate from Prophet 'Isma'il (عليه السلام) son of Prophet Ibrahim (عليه السلام) on wikishia's page on prophets. I tried to find out more through this, but I could only find this link: http://ahlulbaytportal.net/en.php/page,28246A64432.html?PHPSESSID=58ec25b69e6a9ae5178275b1184e81b1 The link cannot be accessed unfortunately. So my first question, can anyone help me in learning more about this Prophet 'Isma'il (عليه السلام)? My second question, is this prophet in fact Prophet 'Isma'il (Sadiq al-wa'd) (عليه السلام)? I would appreciate any and all help, this is a very interesting topic to me since I am fascinated by the history of Islam as well, and would like to spread knowledge to my family about this. JazakAllah Wa 'Alaikum Assalaam Wa Rahmatullah i Wa Barakaatuh

Bismillah i Rahman i Raheem Assalaam o 'Alaikum Wa Rahmatullah i Wa Barakaatuh I am currently a student in high school. I've had an interest in mathematics and physics, but I may not be able to pursue that interest due to some past incidents where some cruel people sabotaged my academics and due to some other financial issues. My life plan was to initially study these two subjects and then after that attend the Hawza at Najaf and study the faith there. However, it seems unlikely for this to be the case, so I have been thinking about turning the plan on its head, such that I study at Hawza e Najaf instead first, and if I live long enough, study physics and mathematics at some institution separately. I am aware of how different life will be if I choose to live in Najaf and how I'll need to make a living there, especially due to language issues considering I am from Pakistan, and my understanding of arabic/farsi is essentially absolutely zero, but I have heard it isn't impossible to live there even with these issues. I write this post in seeking guidance as to how to apply to the Hawza, how to essentially get admitted there, and study there. I would sincerely appreciate this help. JazakAllah Wa 'Alaikum Assalaam Wa Rahmatullah i Wa Barakaatuh

Its disguisting how the world started hating the muslim society (especially shia-islam) at once! for example: we all know in the western culture that someone can be rejected for work on application interview only because his foreign islamic name or even of their appereance like a hijab. Or if we take it more worse like being rejected for a study only with a hijab on!!! -> lately a lot of schools/universities are opening a new law for students to not wear a hijab and if you don't agree then you should get off the school! that means its getting more and more tight for the muslims these days especially women with a hijab on! I will put down below some of the hijab-bans from this year ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 1,Macron's anti-Islam remarks trigger far-right policies in Franc French President Emmanuel Macron's recent remarks that target Islam triggered far-right groups in the country to implement anti-Muslim policies, especially against Muslim women who wear headscarves. Macron recently claimed that some Islamic religious practices are "separatist" because they carry the threat of seceding from French institutions and rules. scources:https://www.dailysabah.com/world/europe/macrons-anti-islam-remarks-trigger-far-right-policies-in-france France, Oct. 7, 2020. ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 2.BRUSSELS Some 1,000 people took the streets in the Belgian capital on Sunday to advocate for the right to wear headscarves at universities. scources:https://www.aa.com.tr/en/europe/belgian-protest-for-headscarf-rights-at-university/1900618 Belgium 05.07.2020 -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- countries with hijab ban 1.Kosovo (since 2009) 2.Turkey (gradually lifted) 3.Azerbaijan (since 2010) ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- there are multiple hadith saying that the muslims in the end of time will experience a really hard time, since the begin of 2000 the world turned step by step more arrogant towards an inocent religion and is busy accusing the muslims of alots of attacks (9 11-building) which we haven't done.. if you look at the difference of life before 2000 then everyone will say it was unjust BUT never against islam as much as now.. what are youre toughts???

Salaam Brothers and Sisters, So I took a course at uni which is commonly known to be a bird course (easy course). It turned out to be a social sciences/gender-studies/ feminism course in disguise . The prof described herself as an ardent feminist. I honestly tried switching out to another course as I'm not interested in this at all and would rather invest my efforts elsewhere, but everything else is full. So, looks like I'm going to have to put up with this, I guess it'll be an opportunity for me to learn about contemporary fitna lol. I just watched the first part of lecture 1, and she legit disparaged/villified/demonized motherhood and wifehood. And ironically, she's referring to those who promoted these aspects of womanhood and femininity in history as "cults". I am a little worried about the writing assignment because while I haven't explored the course yet too deeply, I'm almost certain that I will have conflicting and differing views with the Prof on like everything, one example would be that I believe in God and that ultimately everything should be done for His sake and according to the guidance He provided for mankind. Another example would be the fact that I don't believe that the scientific method is the only method to study phenomena/existence. I'm worried about my mark...do I stay low-key about my views and write gibberish my way through the writing assignments, or do I express my views in the course and risk my marks? Any advice on how to navigate through this course as a believer would be greatly appreciated. Also: 1. Would like to hear your answers on the following question - Does Islam believe in the equal treatment of men and women (OR Is the equal treatment of men and women the right way to go?) ? If so, what does this equal treatment mean and how does it differ with what the West and also modern feminists seems to be pushing? 2. Please refer me to any Islamic books or other literature (including non-muslim works because oblviously she'll only believe that which is proven by science (funnily, she remarked that she'd love to even throw away biology if she could)) regarding women/femininity/gender-roles. To be honest, I haven't explored this topic too deeply on paper. I just believe that I generally know what encompasses the good and the bad pertaining to gender roles. I've done some quick searches online and in terms of non-muslims, I look forward to learning more about the views of the famous University of Toronto Professor, Jordan Peterson. The man seems quite impressive and bold, and very different than those in his field. @Ayuoobi @Mohammad313Ali

Salaams. Looking for lyrics or audio/video of an old Maatam called “ey Tashnalab Hussein Qateel e Jaffa” have been looking for years. Please help inshAallah

Salam respected brothers and sisters. I have been seriously struggling with my own desires for years now and it is very difficult (amongst the worst things I have had to go through) and I don’t even do things which increases desire like looking at non-mahram (I do occasionally get thoughts which I try to not to occupy me) and so I really think as one of the last resorts to come out to this forum and ask for help from anyone who might know a person or a friend who in turn knows a friend that is willing to do temporary marriage (I am a guy). I will deeply appreciate the help from any brother or sister and keep you in my daus inshallah.