rkazmi33

This seems like very twisted thinking. What's the point of talking in a nice way if you are going to kill a person? What hurts more? someone saying mean things or someone killing you? I think the person getting killed will prefer if the other person is harsh or abusive, but doesn't kill him. This reminds me of ISIS videos, where they were talking so nicely to the prisoners. Also, they took their prisoners to kill several times, but they would not kill them. That's why when they actually killed a person, he was thinking it is another false alarm. In all the videos posted by them, their victims looked calm and relaxed. It was sad to see those victims, smiling and feeling good with sweet talk, while they didn't know they were going to get killed next moment. To me, it looked like a last sick twisted attempt to mock their victims: "look at this fool, he is smiling and just because we talked nicely with him, he thinks we are his friends. He doesn't know what is going to happen to him in few minutes". Killing a person is still zulm and it's much greater zulm than verbally abusing a person. By talking nicely to your victim, you just make yourself feel good, it doesn't count as kindness. Your victim will hate you as much. To him, it doesn't matter whether you talking nicely or harshly to him before killing him. You are his killer, and he doesn't care if you are classy or rude. This is the ideology of Sufis, they are all nice and sweet talk on surface but in reality they are like ISIS.

I speak English and Urdu.

@Propaganda_of_the_Deed I have read all his threads and I have probably commented on all those threads. I am going through something similar, although my circumstances are not as bad as his circumstances. I still don't understand people's frustrations with his threads. It doesn't cost you anything to just read about his problems and say I will pray for you brother. He probably doesn't realize that he has a mental disorder and his family should be taking him to the doctor to get help, but it sounds like they consider him a burden and they don't want to help him. I was able to go to doctor and get medicine. But it seems like his condition is more severe. He needs our prayers and sympathy. It can happen to anyone, please show compassion.

Can we please refrain from giving reality checks to the OP? It's obvious he already receives plenty of mean comments from the world. I don't understand how much it costs us to just read about someone's problems and say a few kind words. If you don't like reading his threads, just ignore them.

Kalb e Sadiq is very famous speaker. I always assumed it was Qalb e Sadiq. Yesterday I checked online and I realized that Kalb is a common name. I guess I never noticed the spellings until now and I always assumed the name was Qalb.

WaAlaikumus salam dear brother! I am sorry that you have to deal with all this. Have you tried going to a doctor? Taking medication for anxiety and depression will be really good for you. I will remember you in my prayers. Please don't lose hope.

Inna lillahe wa inna ilaehe rajeoon. I will recite Juz 28, and Juz 29 InshahAllah.

There is a new scholar coming to our centre and his name is Kalb e Abbas Rizvi. I am so shocked to see his name. I am not sure if this is a typo because his name means dog. If it's a typo, then it's a very big mistake and it's sad that someone would disrespect a scholar like that. If it's his real name then that's even more sad. A person must have very low self respect to agree to have a name like that. Most of the people remain immature till their old age and having a name like that is like giving an open invitation to people to mock you and insult you. I am so shocked at what is happening to Shias. Why cannot we find better ways to show love towards Ahlul Bayt? This is why my family wants to send me to Pakistan. In eastern cultures, some people are mocked and humiliated constantly and they are okay with it. In my family, that person has to be me but I am not okay with it. I get angry and fight and demand respect. I believe and I will always believe that all humans are equal and they all deserve respect and dignity. This is the first time I have heard this name and I hope such names are not common.

I think we need to define loyalty first. For me loyalty to spouse means not having emotional or physical affairs with anyone when you are married. Loyalty with friends means you give them respect, help them in hard times as much as you can, never take them for granted or take advantage of them, not back-stab them in anyway, protect their property, and not having emotional affairs with their husbands. Loyalty also means not collaborating with your friends' enemies in exchange for money and other favors. That's my definition of loyalty and I am very very loyal. Because of my loyalty people think I am weak and many people have even called me dog. For other people, definition of loyalty is different. They think loyalty means never ever breaking your relationship no matter how much abuse you have to take and giving sacrifices for your friends. If they need something, you have to sacrifice your own needs for them, and allowing them to use your things like your hard-earned money without permission. In fact, many friends expect to share money, property, even husband equally. People also think loyalty means supporting friends in their bad and illegal activities. Like a friend is loyal if he/she will commit a murder with you. By this definition of loyalty, I am not loyal at all. If someone abuses me, I try to get rid of them, and I don't feel entitled to other people's property and money and I expect them to have some boundaries. I believe in give and take, I don't believe in a relationship where you only give and give and give in the name of loyalty. We can check if someone if truthful by checking if their expressions tell their inner feelings. People can always know exactly what I am feeling with my face expressions. I consider this a weakness and it has made me socially awkward. Most people have very expressionless faces or they can control their expressions according to the situation. I wish I could do that.

Has anyone else noticed that a lot of older siblings are turning against younger siblings? I was watching Dr.... Phil and I keep seeing shows where parents and the eldest sibling have made a team against younger sibling. They complain about the bad behavior of one person and present her as a monster but I can see what's the reason of that bad behavior. When you are constantly compared to someone and your whole family forms a team against you, it hurts you and makes you angry. It does effect your studies and you become a failure which gives people more reasons to critisize you. It's a vicious circle. I have seen this happening to a lot of younger siblings. What are the odds that all younger siblings are just evil people? I think that it happens with narcissistic parents, they have one golden child and one black sheep. They torture the scape goat with the help of golden child. But why are so many parents becoming narcissistic? I thought it was happening because how Trump treats Ivanka and is so unfair to his other kids. But people hate Trump, so why are they imitating his behavior?

Assalam-o-alaikum! I was watching some videos about how people make money and I saw many people mentioning Robinhood. I tried to do some research but different people say different things. Some people say you can make around $100-$150 per month. But other people said they were able to make the same amount of money they made from their full time job. So my question is has anyone here used this app? I want to make at least $100-$125 per week, so how much should I invest? Is it easy to use or do I need to know a lot about stocks to make money? It looks like easy to use, they give analyst recommendations about every stock. So my plan is to buy the stocks which have a high analyst rating. If I invest $5000 or $10000, will I be able to make around $500 every month? I figured since so many students are using it, it must be easy to use. I believe you can only make 3 transactions per month. Is there a way to increase your transactions?

I recently saw a news report about a woman in Pakistan. She got a Masters degree and for 5 years no one saw her outside her home. After 5 years her neighbors complained and news reporters found her naked, in a house filled with garbage, she had gone insane, she couldn't talk and she was acting like a 5 year old child. Her brother was claiming to be both her mother and father and he was treating her like a 5 year old child, 1 minute he was slapping her, next minute he was asking her if she wants to eat something. In 5 years, she lost all her intelligence and sanity. I don't trust moral values of any man and I can never be completely dependent upon a man. Women can do every kind of sin while staying at home, and most men are controlled by cunning and evil women. Becoming a house wife means becoming a slave for those evil women and the least humiliating type of slavery is a corporate job.

Like Some other members have mentioned, I have been betrayed by everyone. First betrayal was by my ex-husband. I sponsored his green card, tried to take care of him while I was working full time and never asked him for any money. He cheated on me with my own sister, all my cousins and verbally and emotionally abused me. I was able to get rid of him after 3 years. I was betrayed not only by my husband but my family, extended family which gave him too much attention, it got to his head and he started thinking he was superior than me. While I was dealing with marriage, I became part of a cult. I gave them all my savings because they made me feel good. When you give your savings to someone, it's like you give 4 or 5 years of your life to someone else, it's literally your blood and sweat. They did save me from suicide but I think they took a very high payment. I was thinking that I was one of 313 and I was going to bring a change. Later I realized that they were not working for any change, they use hundreds of people dealing with abuse for money and volunteer work. Now I am a ping pong ball between my family and that cult. When my family hurts me, I seek help from that cult, and when I get hurt by cult, I seek help from my family. My sister is the one who betrayed me most. After she used my husband to torture me, I stopped talking to her but I have to live with her. Since I don't talk to her, she doesn't get a chance to betray me more. She wants to make me alone, every friend that I make, she turns that friend against me. She has become the victim in front of whole family and community because of me cutting ties, and constantly tries to torture me indirectly. I have developed trust issues. I don't make any friends, I am scared of all people. Everytime I meet a new person, I can only think how will this person hurt me. I have lost motivation to do good deeds, do anything in life. I have also become bitter, cynical and quiet which effects my relationships at work. If the betrayals stopped, I would get a chance to heal but it doesn't stop.

This is when you settle for an abusive man. For many Muslim women, marriage is their first relationship while men mostly have experience. They can take advantage of this situation.

I may be going off topic but I think my post is still relevant to thread. 1. When a woman is married to a succesful man: People in comments section were saying there's so much pain in her eyes and he had a smirk on his face while she was crying. 2. When woman settles for a man-child 3. Now an example of an EQUAL relationship. I have to say this is my favorite couple. I have never seen a more loving couple in real life. It reminds me of why women shouldn't settle. I liked the part when she said " I felt like I was helping you and that made me feel good. Then I realized we were both helping each other". Although I have to say his eyes and smile are a little creepy.