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In the Name of God بسم الله

Syed1208

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About Syed1208

  • Birthday 03/27/1993

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  • Location
    London
  • Religion
    Shia Islam
  • Favorite Subjects
    Travel, politics, reading, FOOD

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    Female

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  1. The Qur’an is a series of ayats that came down in reaction to the social setting of the time, a warning, or a lesson to the people. It cannot be taken out of context. There isn’t a specific verse which refers to the head covering and this is because the women were already in the habit of covering their heads wither cloths in the popular turban style hijab at that time. The verse came down to “tell the believing women to pull their galabiyah over their bosoms” which was a command in extension of what they were already doing. Many women today argue that there is no compulsion of hijab because there is no explicit command but the Qur’an is an implicit book - as far as debate goes, there are many Hadith from the imams which stress the importance and value of hijab at all times. Also, the biggest tragedy of Kerbala has always been the taking of hijab from the women of the AhlulBayt. We must really consider this, it is sooo important in helping us see the value and importance of hijab. We cry every year about Shaam e Ghareeban, why? Because it was the pinnacle of oppression and disrespect. As Shi’a we really have the best role models , as Shi’a women, I would argue, we have the most aspirational role models to look up to. We should try to replicate their practices as best we can. (Reminder to myself before anyone else) I’m sorry that he thinks this way, my dad was similarly inclined when I mentioned I wanted to wear hijab. I was 10 and he was against it. I did it anyway and Alhamdulillah it has been almost 16 years - he has also come round and sees that it is a positive part of my life. About 3 years ago my mum and older sister also started wearing duppata - I hope your sister can see the beauty of why we have to wear hijab insha’Allah.
  2. Salam The first thing I would say to you is, please don’t apologise, or seek to minimise your desperation/ feelings by acknowledging that there are people worst off. It is also okay to be critical of someone that you love and respect, so don’t apologise for having assessed how your mothers actions made you feel. You need to understand that your mental health is absolutely key, and needs to be prioritised over any cultural, educational or religious requirements someone may have of you, or that you are imposing on yourself. My advice to you would be to look into talking therapy courses that are free, also many universities offer free counselling services. These are the first steps in order to make sure that you are able to express your feelings outward in a constructive way. The worst thing you can do is keep it all in. In terms of your OCD, sometimes you have to give in a little bit. I know that sometimes following a routine, or cleaning in a certain way can provide a level of control that we desperately seek. Take one day at a time, and remember that while du’a and Salah and remembrance of God may not be the absolute answer, they most definitely can’t hurt. Something that helped me overcome a range of my mental health issues and incredibly difficult relationship with my parents was re-engineering my thought process. I realised that I was relying too much on myself to be my saviour. Please don’t put too much pressure on yourself to be the perfect, balanced daughter. Home is just a word that we give somewhere that we are comfortable. If the house in which you live us becoming toxic and a trigger, find somewhere that you can call home. This can be a library, a friends company, a counsellors office, anything you want. And when you begin to feel anxious or depressed take an active step to out time aside to visit that place. This restores control and gives you something to look forward to. In regards to making friends, join some societies, sign up for extra courses I.e. language, join a cause you care about I.e. social mobility or a charity etc. Like minded individuals will make you feel more comfortable and at ease than the wide diaspora that university in general provides. I hope this was helpful, most of all please don’t feel embarrassed ashamed or alone. You are incredibly loved and special, I’m certain. Du’as Syeda
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