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In the Name of God بسم الله


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Everything posted by BaZaRi

  1. The best way to counter that claim is to ask what is meant by we being happy? Lets for a moment agree that we should forget everything and live life the way it makes us happy and that will make god happy. The irony there is there is no definition of happiness we can all agree to. So none of us will be happy. Worse still, what would make some of us happy makes other unhappy. How many times we have hurt our fellow friends/colleagues to get something what we want. Yes, after getting what we wanted, we were happy but at the expense of making someone else sad. By living life that way, will god be happy because I am happy or sad because the other party is sad? Does he/she also agree that god should be sad whenever we are sad? This logic cannot hold grounds because god is NOT a manifestation of our feelings (of happiness or sadness). Leave aside god, one would assume our parents to be happy whenever we are happy but that is not necessarily the case. They see things from a more matured perspective and despite wanting us to be happy all the times, know there have to be some rules so we can be happy. When they say that we need to be home by 10pm it not that they do not want our happiness, its just that they know better. God the all knowing knows much much more and has therefore set some rules to be followed so we are happy. If we achieve that level of happiness, then god will be pleased with us and "be happy"
  2. Islam has divided the upbringing of a child into three stages from birth to age 21. The division is based on the following hadith of the Prophet (s.a.w.): “The child is the master for seven years; and a slave for seven years and a vizier for seven years; so if he grows into a good character within 21 years, well and good; otherwise leave him alone because you have discharged your responsibility before Allah.” The same hadith has been explained by Imam Ja`far as-Sadiq (a.s.): “Let your child play upto seven years; and keep him with you (for education and training) for another seven years; then if he succeeds (well and good); otherwise, there is no good in him.” ( at the first hadith, I have always assumed that after age 21 you should get married . lol :) ) From that, if you have CORRECTLY discharged your duty in those first 14 years, you will have nothing to fear, else the blame does partly fall on you. The main problem in current times is parents start looking at their children's islamic values when they are nearing the age of marriage and expect everything to have happened on its own. Living in the west MAY make upbringing more challenging but it is definitely better than "take for granted" islamic environment in the east/middle east. There is as much chance of your child going astray in the east/mid.east as in the west if you neglect your duties. Lets try not to blame the western environment COMPLETELY for our own negligence.
  3. I really do not see how a platonic friendship can exists between a boy and a girl over the long term. But then I have not seen the whole world also. Lets look at what friendship is generally assumed to be Value that is found in friendships is often the result of a friend demonstrating the following on a consistent basis: The tendency to desire what is best for the other Sympathy and empathy Honesty, perhaps in situations where it may be difficult for others to speak the truth, especially in terms of pointing out the perceived faults of one's counterpart Mutual understanding and compassion Trust in one another (able to express feelings - including in relation to the other's actions - without the fear of being judged); able to go to each other for emotional support Positive reciprocity - a relationship is based on equal give and take between the two parties. The above type of friendship cannot be achieved without sharing personal information or some level of intimacy. And once you start sharing personal information (forget about being intimate) you are inviting someone into your private life. Agreed that friends are to help you with your life, but life is not three or four years that one can say so and so is my friend and then two days down the line the friendship is over. In those cases friendship was never there. You were merely coexisting. I have many male colleagues in office and had several in shool but not everyone I came in contact with is my friend. They are just co-workers or school mates and I prefer them to keep to that. Inviting someone in my personal affairs is a major decision that I cannot make on a whim. That is to fellow gender. Now imagine, some has a close type of friendship with opposite gender. After marriage how would the spouse feel? Imagine your husband coming to know that there are other men (who she could have married if she wanted) who know her more than he does? who know more about her than he does? that you are sharing matters with some male other than him? Worse, imagine there are fellow females who know your husband more than him. They know each and everything thing about him since school days. and he would rather share some matters with them than you because he is already more "comfortable" talking to them? I dont know about others, but most people would not be able to stand that. Unless of course they are in the same boat having such kinds of friendships themselves, Or you are married to one of those friends. Else no person with self esteem prefers to share their personal life matters with someone with whom such friendship will never last. Before committing to any friendship, ask yourself that if i were to get married a few years down the line, would my spouse be happy to know that I have had these kinds of friends?
  4. The following book may be a good reference for you to know the effects of music on our body and why it is haram: Music and its Effects. You can read/download it here
  5. Very true. and this is the sorry state our brother finds himself in. It seems his wife is just experimenting or seeing all this as a joke/game. The joke is on him rather than her. He should either see how far she wants to go or put end to it immediately.
  6. It is perfectly okay for them to get married. The only problem is getting a husband. Now the culture in such that all men want to marry virgin woman (ironically, even if they themselves were fooling around). Then just as there are men who look at a potential spouses qualities and do not mind marrying a divorcee or a widow, there are some who do not mind marring a raped woman also. However, since marriage is based on trust, it is best to tell the potential husband about this. If he really wants to marry the woman and her personality then he will still marry, but if he wants to marry her just for the body, he wont. And its best to disregard proposals from people who just want to marry for the body. IMO.
  7. If he can NOT have children due to medical reasons, there is very little that can be done But otherwise, men prefer to delay children for financial reasons.
  8. Couldn't say it better myself lol I dont know what your and his age is, but the only major risk I see here is that after being financially stable, have a house and having all that he is waiting for; he changes his mind and you have reached an age at which getting a spouse becomes more and more difficult. Other than that, if you think he is the one, there is no risk in waiting
  9. May I suggest you give the following a thought before taking any decision And how does your mother treat you? Is it very different? Have you ever considered asking her why he does that? Does he treat only you that way? what about your siblings? Is this sort of treatment in private or publicly?
  10. LoL. Personally, I think black magic cannot affect you unless you decide to believe in it yourself. There are many people who CLAIM to be able to put and remove black magic. Since black magic is prohibited, If type of alim you are looking for is one who fights fire with fire (ie using a counter blackmagic to remove the blackmagic done on you) , I do not think you will find a shia alim so easily to remove one. Even if they can, it does not necessarily have to do anything with religion. However, there are numerous duas and taweez that you can read/wear which may ward off such evil Finding such a person also depends on where exactly you live.
  11. Thankfully where I work, they have a prayer room and a separate basin for wudhu only. No need to go to washroom to do wudhu. But then, its not that all employers are that considerate
  12. According to Ayatollah Sistani, it is allowed Please read question no4 on this page on his site http://www.sistani.org/local.php?modules=nav&nid=5&cid=415&hl=interest
  13. (B) Restrictions based on Religion Marriage between two people who do not follow the same religion creates problems in the day-to-day life of the couple because no aspect of our life is outside the jurisdiction of the Islamic shari'ah. Consequently restriction in marriage based on religious differences is quite natural A Shi'ah Muslim Man · can marry: a Shi'ah Muslim woman. a non-Shi'ah Muslim woman. however, if there is danger of being misled, then it is haram. a Jewish or Christian woman in mut'a only. · cannot marry: a woman of any other faith. A Shi'ah Muslim Woman · can marry: a Shi'ah Muslim man. a non-Shi'ah Muslim man, although it is better not to do so; and if there is danger of being misled, then it is haram. · cannot marry: a non-Muslim man. As taken from "Marriage and Morals in Islam" Section C part 1 B. you can read the whole book here
  14. 1. IMO it does not break fast. words that would break wudhu are the sort of which makes one a non muslim. ie words (whether vulgar or not) that associate a partner to god (shirk) thus making one a mushrik, hence najis. that would break wudhu. Again thats IMO 2. the publication of his islamic laws does not specifically mention this situation. I suggest you can write to him and ask. Although, I presume after wudhu, one goes straight for prayers and there is no such opportunity to abuse ot do other things
  15. In an ideal situation, these pre-nuptial agreements would also be infront of witnesses. As mentioned above, you should have multiple copies of original and sign them all, just like an employment contract where you have one set of originals and your emplyer has another set of originals.
  16. Many men do not disclose their intentions before marriage. Esp in the subcontinent when the potential spouses dont even meet before marriage. Moreover, men change with time. A hijabi woman should never remove her hijab because her husband says so. If her own faith is shallow, thats another story altogether. Hijab, just like namaaz and fast is a matter between the wife and god. If she does not want, the husband should advise her and tell her about her reponsibility towards religion, but IMO forcing her will not make things any better. Similarly, the wife should remind her husband of his reponsibilities towards religion, I dont think she can "force" her husband in the same way a husband can.
  17. All your questions above are answered in the very first chapter of the book "Khums (The Islamic Tax)" by Sayyid Muhammad Rizvi You can read it hereor download it from here Let quote a few paragraphs that answer the first few questions below here: KHUMS IN THE QUR'AN & HISTORY "Khums" literally means "one-fifth or 20%". In Islamic legal terminology, it means "one-fifth of certain items which a person acquires as wealth, and which must be paid as an Islamic tax". The Qur'an mentions it in the following verse: Know that whatever of a thing you acquire, a fifth of it is for Allah, for the Messenger, for the near relative, and the orphans, the needy, and the wayfarer...(8:41) In this verse, the word "ghanimtum" has been used which has been translated as "you acquire". As explained above, it means "certain items which a person acquires as wealth." What are these certain items? According to the ahadith of the Imams of Ahlu 'l-bayt, the items which are eligible for khums are seven: 1. the profit or the surplus of the income. 2. the legitimate wealth which is mixed with some illegitimate wealth. 3. mines and minerals. 4. the precious stones obtained from sea by diving. 5. treasures. 6. the land which a dhimmi kafir buys from a Muslim. 7. the spoils of war. However, there are some people who interpret the word "ghanimtum" as "whatever of a thing you acquire as spoils of war," thus confining the obligation of khums to the spoils of war only. This interpretation is based on ignorance of the Arabic language, the history of khums, the Islamic laws and of the interpretation of the Qur'an. To make this point crystal clear, I would like to quote the following arguments from my father, `Allamah Sayyid Saeed Akhtar Rizvi. In reading the following paragraphs, remember that the word ghanimtum has been derived from al-ghanimah. "The Meaning of Ghanimtum: The famous Arabic dictionary of al-Munjid (by Father Louis Ma`luf of Beirut) says, al-ghanim and al-ghanimah means: (a) What is taken from the fighting enemies by force. (B) All earnings generally...Furthermore, the saying al-ghunm bi 'l-ghurm means that the profit stands against expenses, i.e., as the owner is the sole proprietor of the profit and nobody shares it with him, therefore only he bears all the expenses and risk.'(See the entry under G-N-M; in the 28th edition of al-Munjid (Beirut: Dar el-Machreq, 1986) it is on p. 561. Also see other famous dictionaries like Lisan al-`Arab and al-Qamus.) This implies that in Arabic language al-ghanimah has two meanings: one the spoils of war, and the other 'profit'. The above quoted proverb also proves that 'profit' is not uncommon meaning. When a word in the Qur'an can be interpreted in more than one way, it is incumbent upon the Muslims to seek guidance from the Prophet and the Ahlu 'l-bayt. Otherwise, they would be guilty of tafsir bi 'r-ra'iy (interpreting the Qur'an according to one's own personal views); and this is a sin which pushes the sinner into jahannam. "The History of Khums: Khums is one of those things which were introduced by `Abdu 'l-Muttalib, the grandfather of the Prophet, and continued in Islam. Acting upon a command of God given to him in dream, when `Abdu 'l-Muttalib rediscovered the well of Zamzam, he found in it many valuable things which were buried in it in very remote past by the Ismailites when they feared that their enemies would usurp them. When `Abdu 'l-Muttalib found that buried treasure, he gave away its one-fifth (literally, khums) in the way of God and kept the remaining four-fifth to himself. Then it became a custom in his family; and after the hijrah of the Prophet, the same system was incorporated in Islam. Thus the first khums was not given from the 'spoils of war', but from a buried treasure (which is one of the seven items eligible for khums.) "The Islamic Laws: Not a single sect of Islam confines the meaning of ghanimah to the 'spoils of war'. In addition to the 'spoils of war' the following items are subject to khums: (a) Minerals: eligible for khums in Shi`ah and Hanafi sects. (B) Buried treasure: eligible for khums in all Muslim sects (that is, Shi`ah, Hanafi, Maliki, Hanbali and Shafi`iy). "The Interpretation of the Qur'an: As mentioned earlier, the interpretation of the Qur'an must be based on the teachings of the Ahlu 'l-bayt. The word ghanimah in the verse under discussion has clearly been interpreted as 'al-fa'idatu 'l-muktasabah -- the earned profit' by our Imams. "To conclude, we can say that the word ghanima was never treated as being confined to the 'spoils of war' by any sect of Islam; and as far as our Imams are concerned, it meant many things besides the spoils of war right from the day of Imam `Ali (peace be upon him), as the authentic traditions show." (Rizvi, S.S.A., Your Questions Answered, vol. 1 (Dar-es-salaam: Bilal Muslim Mission, 1973) p. 44-46.) What has been quoted above can also be substantiated from the practice of the Prophet of Islam himself. For example, when the Prophet sent `Amr bin Hazm to Yemen, he wrote instructions for him in which, among other things, he says, "...to gather the khums of Allah from the gains [of Yemenis]." (Ibn Khaldun, Ta'rikh, vol. 2, part II (Beirut: al-A`lami, 1971) p. 54; Ibn Kathir, al-Bidayah wa 'n-Nihayah, vol. 5 (Beirut: al-Ma`arif, 1966) pp. 76-77; Ibn Hisham, Sirah, vol. 4 (Beirut: Daru 'l-Jayl, 1975) p. 179.) And when the tribe of Bani Kilal of Yemen sent its khums to the Prophet, the latter acknowledges it by saying, "Your messenger has returned and you have paid the khums of Allah from the gains (al-ghana'im)." (Abu `Ubayd, al-Amwal (Beirut: Mu'assah Nasir, 1981) p. 13; al-Hakim, Mustadrak, vol. 1 (Hyderabad: `Uthmaniyyya Press, 1340 AH) p. 395. For more references, see Ja`far Murtada al-`Amili, al-Sah¡h fi Sirati 'n-Nabi, vol. 3 (Qum: n.p, 1983) p. 309.) It is interesting to note that the Bani Kilal obeyed the Prophet's order and sent the khums of its gains to him while no war had taken place between the Muslims of Yemen and the unbelievers. This is a clear indication that khums was not restricted by the Prophet to the spoils of war. The importance given by the Prophet to the issue of khums can also be seen in his advice to the delegation of Bani `Abdu 'l-Qays. It seems that Bani `Abdu 'l-Qays (which was a branch of Rabi`ah) was not a very strong tribe. Moreover, in order to travel to Medina, they had to cross an area inhabited by the Muzar tribe which was against the Muslims. Consequently, the Bani `Abdu 'l-Qays could not travel safely to Medina except during the months in which war-fare was forbidden according to the Arab custom. Once a delegation from Bani `Abdu 'l-Qays came to Medina and said to the Prophet, "We cannot come to you except in the haram months [when war-fare is forbidden], and there are between us and you the unbelievers of Muzar. Therefore, please give us some advice that we may give to those whom we have left behind and that we may enter the Paradise [by acting on it ourselves]." The Prophet advised them to believe in One God, establish prayer, pay zakat, fast in the month of Ramadhan, and "to pay khums (one-fifth) of whatever you gain." (Bukhari, Sahihu 'l-Bukhari, vol. 4 (Beirut: Daru 'l-`Arabiyyah, n.d.) p. 213; Abu `Ubayd, al-Amwal, p. 13. This has also been recorded by other Sunni sources of hadith like Sahih Muslim, Sunan Nisa'i, Musnad of Ahmad bin Hanbal, and Sunan of Tirmidhi.) The circumstances of the Bani `Abdu 'l-Qays -- they were weak and small in numbers, and were thus prevented from traveling safely to Medina -- leaves no room for interpreting the application of khums in the above hadith on spoils of war exclusive
  18. BaZaRi


    Question: Is it permissible to “shop around” for the bank or account, which offers us the best return rate on our money (Interest)? Answer: It is permissible in a non-Muslim country. from http://www.sistani.org/local.php?modules=nav&nid=5&cid=415&hl=interest see question4
  19. Such a punishment can only given by a righteous judge. There are very stringent condition for this punishment and if all of them can be fulfilled, then I must say that the ones who did commit such a sin were really shameless. I mean, you need four righteous people to give evidence. graphic details which must be corroborated by the judge from each one individually. eg, just saying i saw so and so committing such act is not enough if they can provide no further details. If someone is so shameless to do it in front of four such people (i am assuming such a righteous person does not go to brothels where he can witness many of these acts) then he/she better repent and accept to be punished in this world and not hereafter the stoning is as much of a deterrant to others as it is a punishment to them
  20. Not all sea creatures are fish Fish are those sea creatures which have scales Since catfish does NOT have scales, they are not "fish" for purposes of determining whether they can be eaten or not. Same would apply to octopus, lobster?,crab?
  21. There are three types of wrong Wrong against self. eg masterbation Wrong against god eg not praying Wrong against others eg cheating a fellow human God may forgive the first two on his own (all three if he wants to, because he can do anything and everything), but he will forgive the third type of wrong only if the person whom you have wronged also forgives you thats IMO
  22. Its not that the son HAS to make up for parents prayers He CAN make up for their prayers It all depends on the upbringing of the parents. If they have nurtured the child well, he will do them this deed, else it everyone to their own deed
  23. Anyone can become a muslim if they want. The simple fact that there is a ruling that disallows illegitimate children to lead prayers implies that the concept of illegitimate person can be a muslim. ie, why would their leadsing prayers be prohibited if they were not muslims? we all know that non muslims cannot lead prayers. this extra "law/rule" is to point out that in addition to non-muslims, illegitimate born muslims cannot lead prayers. hope that makes sense. Also, to those who say that children born to non-muslims are illegitimate, I remember reading somewhere that even for shia couples who are under the impression that they are married and conceive a child (thats the best way I can put it ;) ) the child is considered legitimate. this was in reply to some nikah's being recited wrongly and the couple did not know till long time after. they thought they had been doing zina and their children were illegitimate. From that, it can be implied that if you are under the impression you are married (with nikah or not) then your children are legitimate. I will find the relevant sources and post in a few days. Now, even the non-muslims, at time of marriage and the act that leads to birth of their child, are under the impression that they are married.
  24. Changing the international date line will not affect the prayer times/days. We pray Juma prayers (or for that matter all prayers) based on local time and day. The post there implies Juma i prayed at same time every where. Moreover, the international date line does not determine when a day starts or ends, it is the rising and setting of the sun that determines that. Even now, Juma is prayed in New Zealand on Friday when it is still Thursaday in Brazil.
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