Guests can now reply in ALL forum topics (No registration required!)
In the Name of God بسم الله
Almost all of the marja'a say only resort to istikhara after you have contemplated the issue and consulted people of knowledge- which he did not do in the first place. I guess the way the istikhara came out very bad was though a verse in the Quran. (Meaning, obviously, the sheikh used the Quran for the istikhara.) Regardless, he should not have done istikhara if we were compatible and agreed on the important issues of Islam and marriage. Allahu Alaam... Allah knows best.
I would also like to add that he has not tried to contact me since he told me that he was going to stick with the istikhara, even though I told him that it was not advisable to do istikhara if two people are mutually in agreement with the important issues and share the same morals and values. I also suggested that we go to a sheikh and talk to him, yet he still says that he has to stick with the istikhara. I have been reciting Dua Tawwasul in hopes that he will change his mind and of course praying. Is there anything else that I can do? Should I try to contact him or just let things be? It has only been a few days since all of this transpired.
Salam Alaykum I am writing in regards to the subject of Istikhara. I am a 28 year old Muslim woman and I have been talking to a man with the intention of marriage. We are compatible on so many levels, most importantly with Islam. We are both God-fearing individuals and share many of the same morals and values important to Islam and marriage. Furthermore, we both feel that Allah (SWT) has brought us to each other. I made Istikhara last week, through both the Quran and through offering two rakats of salat and dua, and both came out positive. This man informed me yesterday that his uncle had a sheikh in Lebanon do Istikhara with regards to us continuing to talk for marriage, and the result came out very bad. The main reason the man decided to do Istikhara is because, being divorced, he never did Istikhara before marrying his now-ex-wife and does not want to get hurt again. We are both extremely saddened and confused by this news, as we thought that we were compatible on every level. I am just asking for guidance, as to what we should do in this situation. The man said that he is sticking to the istikhara, as he says it is not a game. I wholeheartedly agree that istikhara is not a game, yet I was told by a local Sheikh that istikhara should not be used if both sides are compatible and agree on most issues. The sheikh also suggested that if we decide to go forth in continuing towards marriage, we should just pay a sadaqa and inshallah everything will be fine. Imam Khomeini (r.a) once used an example regarding Istikhara: He wrote of a girl and boy who were, in all ways, compatible with each other, yet after receiving a negative result through Istikhara, they ended their discussion for marriage. The Imam went on to say that, in instances such as these, only ones who do not have a correct understanding of Istikhara, who have no intelligence, and are defiant would perform it in these instances. I am asking for any guidance that you may have regarding this situation, as to what this man and I should do. I feel that Allah (SWT) sent him to me and that we are naseeb for one another, despite his negative result. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Fe Amani Allah