Jump to content
Guests can now reply in ALL forum topics (No registration required!) ×
Guests can now reply in ALL forum topics (No registration required!)
In the Name of God بسم الله

Iman

Advanced Members
  • Content Count

    2,203
  • Joined

  • Last visited


Reputation Activity

  1. Like
    Iman got a reaction from Ahle Baith Foundation in Qur'an Verse Of The Day   
    (bismillah)
    Assalam alaykum,
    In Surat Yunus (Jonas):


    (bismillah)
    إِنَّ اللّهَ لاَ يَظْلِمُ النَّاسَ شَيْئًا وَلَـكِنَّ النَّاسَ أَنفُسَهُمْ يَظْلِمُونَ

    [Shakir 10:44] Surely Allah does not do any injustice to men, but men are unjust to themselves.
  2. Like
    Iman got a reaction from Ahle Baith Foundation in Qur'an Verse Of The Day   
    (bismillah)
    Assalam alaykum,
    In Surat al-Baqara (the Cow):


    (bismillah)
    فَاذْكُرُونِي أَذْكُرْكُمْ وَاشْكُرُواْ لِي وَلاَ تَكْفُرُونِ

    [Shakir 2:152] Therefore remember Me, I will remember you, and be thankful to Me, and do not be ungrateful to Me.
  3. Like
    Iman got a reaction from Love4the14 in Holding Your Wifes Hand In Public?   
    This is funny. My husband has no problem with this and is the exact opposite.
    I was/am on the more conservative side when it comes to these things but my husband has changed this slightly. He loves holding my hand/arm around my waist. He'll make me swap the shoulder I'm holding my handbag on so that it doesnt disturb/knock into him :lol: If we're on an escalator I make him stand infront of me most of the time though (when I remember!) otherwise I'll very probably get a kiss me on the head or a hug/arm around me.... which isnt a problem per se ... it's actually nice but I am more conservative as I didnt see that growing up. He didnt either I guess... he's just very affectionate (more occasions than not). He has no problems expressing himself, and this to me is a 'real man' and i love him dearly for it (despite my discomfort at times).
    I do think that there need to be boundaries though... some things are NOT acceptable, but holding hands?? Come on. In the Western World where there are inuendos/direct comments about Muslim men treating his wife poorly I think it's good dawa to hold hands, smile, walk together etc etc.
  4. Like
    Iman reacted to Haimi in Istikhara during menstruation   
    And don't recite verses that had a Wajib Sejda.
  5. Like
    Iman got a reaction from YeDokhtar in Men's interpretation of 'right' and 'wrong' hijab?   
    I guess you haven't read it either, directly from the link, and really a big part of the point I've been attempting to make:
    Furthermore, when a person enjoins good and forbids evil, the status and personality of the wrongdoer must be taken into account so that he is not troubled and disrespected. In addition, one must not be so severe and harsh that the wrongdoer becomes averse to the religion and religious activities.
     
  6. Like
    Iman got a reaction from enigma313 in Men's interpretation of 'right' and 'wrong' hijab?   
    I guess you haven't read it either, directly from the link, and really a big part of the point I've been attempting to make:
    Furthermore, when a person enjoins good and forbids evil, the status and personality of the wrongdoer must be taken into account so that he is not troubled and disrespected. In addition, one must not be so severe and harsh that the wrongdoer becomes averse to the religion and religious activities.
     
  7. Like
    Iman got a reaction from awaitingyou1 in Men's interpretation of 'right' and 'wrong' hijab?   
    Really? What is "properly"?
    It is these words in my experience in discussion with the younger girls in particular, that are disheartening to the most well-intentioned muslimah.
    Shaytan finds what he can to enter the minds of even the most faithful. He places doubt in their mind with comments such as yours, the "oh you may as well not even wear the hijab".
    We once had a question and answer session with Sayyid Modaressi at a family members house. Someone asked the question something along the lines of "should girls who wear tight/revealing clothing/make-up, just take off the hijab?" Do you know what his response was?
    An unequivocal NO. 
    I use this example so that I'm not accused of it being "my opinion".
    So, can the community (both men and women) please stop berating these girls/women? No one is better than anyone else.. we are all on a path inshallah to better ourselves.
  8. Like
    Iman got a reaction from rkazmi33 in The modern hijab of women and the best one   
    I don't know the answer to that, Allahu a3lam. 
    I do know this though, Islam is a social religion. If individual issues manifest in social problems, a solution has to be found. Often individual issues ARE a result of the social problems. Many individual problems can be resolved when addressed at a social level. So in the context of this, and that Islam is a socially based religion, what do you suggest when:
    1. Men are not marrying women who are wearing Fatima Zahra (as) version of hijab.
    2. Safety is becoming an issue - the most vulnerable and visible of muslims - your "sisters" are being directly targeted in attacks - not only verbal, but physical.
    3. Young girls especially are starting to feel insecure, even afraid, about their physical appearance. Even though these girls have strong conviction in their faith as Muslims, some have a high level of anxiety that is affecting their participation in the community.
    What do you propose? How do we solve this "problem" of not wearing the hijab per AhlulBayt (as)?
  9. Like
    Iman got a reaction from rkazmi33 in The modern hijab of women and the best one   
    Years since I posted, let alone been on ShiaChat... lol, what am I getting myself into by posting?? I haven't had a chance to read the rest of the thread, and am responding to the OP. Not sure if others have said similar.
    So, why do some Muslim women in hijab dress the way described? There are a few, but namely:
    1. Men/young gentlemen: if you would like the community of women to hold-tight to the hijab as to the liking of our beloved Ahlul Bayt (as)... well then, please approach and marry these girls/women who wear their hijab as Fatima Zahra (as) would. Show your interest. The number of young girls I know who want to "relax" their hijab, because a significant number of guys (read, at least 95%) would not choose to marry someone who was adhering to her hijab in that way - very sad. So they choose to wear something a little 'prettier' (what is 'pretty' is a loooooong spectrum ) to maybe.. just maybe, catch the eye of an otherwise good Muslim guy. And let's not even talk about a good chunk of others whom they observe ogling the non-Muslim girls/muslimas not in hijab. So they think.. what chance have *they* got in meeting someone.
    2. Work situations: I can only speak for myself, but my work situation is not one where I would be physically comfortable wearing an abaya. I mostly wear pants and long tops with a hijab.
    3. Self-esteem.. girls/women in hijab are human too, ya know ;) . Some have a greater sense of self and conviction Alhamdulillah, others less so. We're all a work in progress.
     
    I'm sure there are other reasons, may Allah (swt) guide us all.
  10. Like
    Iman got a reaction from rkazmi33 in The modern hijab of women and the best one   
    Phew! lol, sorry.. I thought you were, but a small part of me thought there's a chance this fellow is being serious.
  11. Like
    Iman got a reaction from DigitalUmmah in Men's interpretation of 'right' and 'wrong' hijab?   
    DigitalUmmah, I appreciate your comment!  
  12. Like
    Iman got a reaction from notme in The modern hijab of women and the best one   
    Inshallah you always have ideals. I too was once an idealist.. naiive even. World was rainbows and unicorns.. I still see them occasionally lol, but I am also very much a realist.. I do have tawakkul alhamdulillah.. it's how I've gotten over some of the most significant difficult moments in my life. These have shaped me, but I also have learned as Rasool Allah (SAAW) taught us, to "rely on Allah (swt)" but to also "tie our camel.." and "not to trip over the same stone twice" ;)  These are lessons for the individual, but also for our community. We need to safeguard and develop resources to protect ourselves. This is unfortunately the world we are living in today, and if it gets worse for "us" (as it likely will), we need to equip our children for how to deal with these issues with strength, clarity and unity inshallah.
    And inshallah ya rabb, you find that person for you, and you can grow together in faith towards Him.
     
    Lots of articles on-line if you want to investigate
     
    Don't apologise - no one is angry I don't think. I do get frustrated with the "mansplaining" that goes on sometimes/ a lot.
    I don't know think I have the answer to that.. these might help though:
    1. Support networks for sisters - regardless of whether they wear hijab.
    2. Finding ways for the brothers to keep their unhelpful comments to themselves - I'm not talking just on here, I mean in public. Some women/girls get men calling out to them at shopping centres for what they should/shouldn't be wearing.
    3. Educating parents/families with workshops/seminar sessions on how to manage the psychological effects of what is going on in the world, in terms of our community and the individual sense of self as Muslims
    Just starting points.
  13. Like
    Iman got a reaction from starlight in Men's interpretation of 'right' and 'wrong' hijab?   
    Really? What is "properly"?
    It is these words in my experience in discussion with the younger girls in particular, that are disheartening to the most well-intentioned muslimah.
    Shaytan finds what he can to enter the minds of even the most faithful. He places doubt in their mind with comments such as yours, the "oh you may as well not even wear the hijab".
    We once had a question and answer session with Sayyid Modaressi at a family members house. Someone asked the question something along the lines of "should girls who wear tight/revealing clothing/make-up, just take off the hijab?" Do you know what his response was?
    An unequivocal NO. 
    I use this example so that I'm not accused of it being "my opinion".
    So, can the community (both men and women) please stop berating these girls/women? No one is better than anyone else.. we are all on a path inshallah to better ourselves.
  14. Like
    Iman got a reaction from Haydar Husayn in The modern hijab of women and the best one   
    The brother was asking about the best hijab, and the reasons why it isn't being worn. I gave him responses based on my knowledge and experiences. And even potential solutions. "Marja3 says XYZ.." unfortunately doesn't mean people will follow through.
  15. Like
    Iman got a reaction from Haydar Husayn in The modern hijab of women and the best one   
    Years since I posted, let alone been on ShiaChat... lol, what am I getting myself into by posting?? I haven't had a chance to read the rest of the thread, and am responding to the OP. Not sure if others have said similar.
    So, why do some Muslim women in hijab dress the way described? There are a few, but namely:
    1. Men/young gentlemen: if you would like the community of women to hold-tight to the hijab as to the liking of our beloved Ahlul Bayt (as)... well then, please approach and marry these girls/women who wear their hijab as Fatima Zahra (as) would. Show your interest. The number of young girls I know who want to "relax" their hijab, because a significant number of guys (read, at least 95%) would not choose to marry someone who was adhering to her hijab in that way - very sad. So they choose to wear something a little 'prettier' (what is 'pretty' is a loooooong spectrum ) to maybe.. just maybe, catch the eye of an otherwise good Muslim guy. And let's not even talk about a good chunk of others whom they observe ogling the non-Muslim girls/muslimas not in hijab. So they think.. what chance have *they* got in meeting someone.
    2. Work situations: I can only speak for myself, but my work situation is not one where I would be physically comfortable wearing an abaya. I mostly wear pants and long tops with a hijab.
    3. Self-esteem.. girls/women in hijab are human too, ya know ;) . Some have a greater sense of self and conviction Alhamdulillah, others less so. We're all a work in progress.
     
    I'm sure there are other reasons, may Allah (swt) guide us all.
  16. Like
    Iman got a reaction from starlight in The modern hijab of women and the best one   
    The brother was asking about the best hijab, and the reasons why it isn't being worn. I gave him responses based on my knowledge and experiences. And even potential solutions. "Marja3 says XYZ.." unfortunately doesn't mean people will follow through.
  17. Like
    Iman got a reaction from starlight in The modern hijab of women and the best one   
    Quick personal questions brother IbnSina - how old are you (or thereabouts if you don't want to say lol)? do you have sisters? what country do you live in? I take it you aren't/haven't been married before based on your comment in the previous post.
     
    I can see that you hold the hijab in very high esteem, mashallah, as one should. However I know of near perfect-abaya-wearing hijabi's who are far from it. I also know women/girls not in hijab who have so much sincerity of faith. And every other mix of taqwa and modesty/hijab in between. Am I better than someone who doesn't wear the hijab? Absolutely not. Is someone in better hijab than what I wear, better than me? Quite possibly, however there is more to hijab than what one wears. The emphasis and pressure that is placed on the "perfect" hijab.. YES we should all strive to better ourselves, but the speed at which I'm seeing the hijab removed in our community.. I'm not surprised. Alhamdulillah I'm okay and inshallah I always remain steadfast with conviction about wearing it, but I wanted to emphasise to you that for so many the pressure is real. The anxiety is real.
    Shaytan: "you will never be like Fatima Zahra (as)... you may as well not wear hijab at all"
    Insecure female: "... gosh... he's right". 
    Sure it is an individual that comes to the decision to wear it, however let us remove the emphasis on individuals and address this as a community issue. We will see the rewards when we do so.
     
    LOL okay. Good luck!  Allah (swt) will compensate everyone for all the struggles people are facing because they are doing their best to follow siraat al mustaqeem. All good and well if someone doesn't care if they get married or not, but many many do. You're an idealist.. it's kind of sweet, however the solution in the face of reality is quite different.
     
    Not possible or even practical.
     
    Allah (swt) will compensate you... Is that your answer to all of life's struggles? For the visibly Muslim woman.. girl. The one struggling with a myriad of issues and is trying to find herself in the world.. how does "Allah (swt) will compensate you" resonate with her? YES inshallah ya rabb He will. But how do we as a muslim community support her? By waving a big stick over her head telling her "YOUR HIJAB IS WRONG!" ? I don't think so.
    A martyr.. a hero.Woohoo! It would also makes my two young children, motherless.
    I was spat at in broad daylight... he was travelling in a car towards me. A coward who could then keep going in his vehicle. I couldn't have chosen a more "safe" environment. I was on a very popular boardwalk with my almost 2 yo daughter, and very pregnant at the time. He was staring at me with such hate as he drove in slow motion towards me. it took me a while to realise that he was angry at *me*. I was half impressed half disgusted and how far the spit travelled. He saw I was pregnant (9mths) and with a toddler. No remorse. Pure hate in his eyes. And more and more women are being/will be targeted quite publicly.
    Not on the mum's and older sisters alone. It is a COLLECTIVE problem. Mothers play a role for sure, but psychology says that fathers actually play a far more significant role in their daughter (and son's) sense of self.
     
    You have good intentions brother IbnSina, I wish the solutions were as "simple" as what you have mentioned. The reality is, that there is so much we need to do as a Muslim community in order to deal with the issues the individuals in it are facing.
  18. Like
    Iman got a reaction from Hameedeh in The modern hijab of women and the best one   
    Years since I posted, let alone been on ShiaChat... lol, what am I getting myself into by posting?? I haven't had a chance to read the rest of the thread, and am responding to the OP. Not sure if others have said similar.
    So, why do some Muslim women in hijab dress the way described? There are a few, but namely:
    1. Men/young gentlemen: if you would like the community of women to hold-tight to the hijab as to the liking of our beloved Ahlul Bayt (as)... well then, please approach and marry these girls/women who wear their hijab as Fatima Zahra (as) would. Show your interest. The number of young girls I know who want to "relax" their hijab, because a significant number of guys (read, at least 95%) would not choose to marry someone who was adhering to her hijab in that way - very sad. So they choose to wear something a little 'prettier' (what is 'pretty' is a loooooong spectrum ) to maybe.. just maybe, catch the eye of an otherwise good Muslim guy. And let's not even talk about a good chunk of others whom they observe ogling the non-Muslim girls/muslimas not in hijab. So they think.. what chance have *they* got in meeting someone.
    2. Work situations: I can only speak for myself, but my work situation is not one where I would be physically comfortable wearing an abaya. I mostly wear pants and long tops with a hijab.
    3. Self-esteem.. girls/women in hijab are human too, ya know ;) . Some have a greater sense of self and conviction Alhamdulillah, others less so. We're all a work in progress.
     
    I'm sure there are other reasons, may Allah (swt) guide us all.
  19. Like
    Iman got a reaction from starlight in The modern hijab of women and the best one   
    Years since I posted, let alone been on ShiaChat... lol, what am I getting myself into by posting?? I haven't had a chance to read the rest of the thread, and am responding to the OP. Not sure if others have said similar.
    So, why do some Muslim women in hijab dress the way described? There are a few, but namely:
    1. Men/young gentlemen: if you would like the community of women to hold-tight to the hijab as to the liking of our beloved Ahlul Bayt (as)... well then, please approach and marry these girls/women who wear their hijab as Fatima Zahra (as) would. Show your interest. The number of young girls I know who want to "relax" their hijab, because a significant number of guys (read, at least 95%) would not choose to marry someone who was adhering to her hijab in that way - very sad. So they choose to wear something a little 'prettier' (what is 'pretty' is a loooooong spectrum ) to maybe.. just maybe, catch the eye of an otherwise good Muslim guy. And let's not even talk about a good chunk of others whom they observe ogling the non-Muslim girls/muslimas not in hijab. So they think.. what chance have *they* got in meeting someone.
    2. Work situations: I can only speak for myself, but my work situation is not one where I would be physically comfortable wearing an abaya. I mostly wear pants and long tops with a hijab.
    3. Self-esteem.. girls/women in hijab are human too, ya know ;) . Some have a greater sense of self and conviction Alhamdulillah, others less so. We're all a work in progress.
     
    I'm sure there are other reasons, may Allah (swt) guide us all.
  20. Like
    Iman got a reaction from Soldiers and Saffron in The modern hijab of women and the best one   
    Years since I posted, let alone been on ShiaChat... lol, what am I getting myself into by posting?? I haven't had a chance to read the rest of the thread, and am responding to the OP. Not sure if others have said similar.
    So, why do some Muslim women in hijab dress the way described? There are a few, but namely:
    1. Men/young gentlemen: if you would like the community of women to hold-tight to the hijab as to the liking of our beloved Ahlul Bayt (as)... well then, please approach and marry these girls/women who wear their hijab as Fatima Zahra (as) would. Show your interest. The number of young girls I know who want to "relax" their hijab, because a significant number of guys (read, at least 95%) would not choose to marry someone who was adhering to her hijab in that way - very sad. So they choose to wear something a little 'prettier' (what is 'pretty' is a loooooong spectrum ) to maybe.. just maybe, catch the eye of an otherwise good Muslim guy. And let's not even talk about a good chunk of others whom they observe ogling the non-Muslim girls/muslimas not in hijab. So they think.. what chance have *they* got in meeting someone.
    2. Work situations: I can only speak for myself, but my work situation is not one where I would be physically comfortable wearing an abaya. I mostly wear pants and long tops with a hijab.
    3. Self-esteem.. girls/women in hijab are human too, ya know ;) . Some have a greater sense of self and conviction Alhamdulillah, others less so. We're all a work in progress.
     
    I'm sure there are other reasons, may Allah (swt) guide us all.
  21. Like
    Iman got a reaction from notme in The modern hijab of women and the best one   
    Years since I posted, let alone been on ShiaChat... lol, what am I getting myself into by posting?? I haven't had a chance to read the rest of the thread, and am responding to the OP. Not sure if others have said similar.
    So, why do some Muslim women in hijab dress the way described? There are a few, but namely:
    1. Men/young gentlemen: if you would like the community of women to hold-tight to the hijab as to the liking of our beloved Ahlul Bayt (as)... well then, please approach and marry these girls/women who wear their hijab as Fatima Zahra (as) would. Show your interest. The number of young girls I know who want to "relax" their hijab, because a significant number of guys (read, at least 95%) would not choose to marry someone who was adhering to her hijab in that way - very sad. So they choose to wear something a little 'prettier' (what is 'pretty' is a loooooong spectrum ) to maybe.. just maybe, catch the eye of an otherwise good Muslim guy. And let's not even talk about a good chunk of others whom they observe ogling the non-Muslim girls/muslimas not in hijab. So they think.. what chance have *they* got in meeting someone.
    2. Work situations: I can only speak for myself, but my work situation is not one where I would be physically comfortable wearing an abaya. I mostly wear pants and long tops with a hijab.
    3. Self-esteem.. girls/women in hijab are human too, ya know ;) . Some have a greater sense of self and conviction Alhamdulillah, others less so. We're all a work in progress.
     
    I'm sure there are other reasons, may Allah (swt) guide us all.
  22. Like
    Iman got a reaction from Askari313 in Raising children spiritually   
    Salams,
    Teaching children to be spiritual comes from teaching children the immence love, mercy and compassion of Allah (swt).
    It's important particularly with children, to teach them the love of Allah (swt) first and foremost, before teaching them about His Wrath..
    Children may 'obey' something they fear.. but I doubt there's love in their hearts for it - they are more likely to do things when its something they love and are excited about eg. building a house in Jannah made out of their very favourite things if they listen to their parents/pray/fast/ 'do good' etc
    Teaching children about Allah (swt)'s wrath needs to be taught at some point, but not in the initial phases - I dont know 'when' pinpointed exactly.. bvut perhaps when they are closer to 7-8? Imam Ali (as) says that the first 7 years we play with our children... the next 7 years, we discipline our children, the next 7, we befriend them.
    As we teach what Allah (swt) can 'do'.. we should never stop teaching about His love and mercy too - this is more likely to bring nearness to Allah (swt) and hence spirituality inshallah as the children get older.
    There needs to be a balance as children need to learn that good is rewarded but 'bad' is punishable too - and perhaps this is through the many stories of our Prophets and Imams (may Allah swt be pleased with them all).
  23. Like
    Iman got a reaction from Noorulain in Menses   
    (bismillah)
    Assalam alaykum,
    JizaakiAllah kheir sis wilayah... I cannot believe what I have just read. It actually goes against every single preconceived notion I had about about menses.
    Although I know/always knew that Allah (swt) judges both men and women equally... part of me worried about one thing especially: I often think of death, and sometimes the thought comes into my head that I may actually die in the state of menses and because blood is najis (so much so that u do not enter a masjid in that time) it made sense to me that consequently I would not go anywhere near Paradise :cry: When I would be in this state, I would even do a dua to Allah (swt) that I not "die" because of this stupid belief I had..
    May Allah (swt) bless you sis wilayah with all the good that can come in this World and the HereAfter. What you have posted means more to me than you will ever realise.
    I have said this before but will say it once again, alhamdullilahi rabbil 3alameen, that I am a Woman of Islam.
    WaSalam
  24. Like
    Iman got a reaction from Hasnain Ali1 in Learn how to pray!   
    (bismillah)

    Assalam alaykum,

    Not sure if I was meant to post here... sorry if not!

    Just a couple of questions:

    Alhamdullilah I have been praying for a number of years, but there are a couple of things I recently didn't realise or would like answers to:

    1. At the beginning of every prayer, do I need to hear the adhaan or atleast say the whole adhaan to myself before i can actually pray? And if I don't will the prayer be invalidated? I always thought I just needed to do tikbeer i.e. say "Allahu Akbar" etc

    2. I have only recently started to prayer the Shia way ( :cry: may all our prayers be accepted), so there are times when I just forget to do one part because I haven't been concentrating properly and done what I usually do, almost like automatic pilot eg I've always been used to saying dua when sitting, not when standing, so sometimes don't remain standing and miss it completely :cry: ... do I need to pray those prayers again??

    Alhamdullilah i am getting better at remembering... inshallah I will continue to.

    Once again, may Allah (swt) accept all our prayers.

    WaSalam
  25. Like
    Iman got a reaction from Gotham in Holding Your Wifes Hand In Public?   
    This is funny. My husband has no problem with this and is the exact opposite.
    I was/am on the more conservative side when it comes to these things but my husband has changed this slightly. He loves holding my hand/arm around my waist. He'll make me swap the shoulder I'm holding my handbag on so that it doesnt disturb/knock into him :lol: If we're on an escalator I make him stand infront of me most of the time though (when I remember!) otherwise I'll very probably get a kiss me on the head or a hug/arm around me.... which isnt a problem per se ... it's actually nice but I am more conservative as I didnt see that growing up. He didnt either I guess... he's just very affectionate (more occasions than not). He has no problems expressing himself, and this to me is a 'real man' and i love him dearly for it (despite my discomfort at times).
    I do think that there need to be boundaries though... some things are NOT acceptable, but holding hands?? Come on. In the Western World where there are inuendos/direct comments about Muslim men treating his wife poorly I think it's good dawa to hold hands, smile, walk together etc etc.
×
×
  • Create New...