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In the Name of God بسم الله


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  1. I completely agree. Guest marriage, my husband was single before he married me, a divorced woman. Although we are not together now, which is beside the point. He didn't feel like this at all. You shouldn't feel like this. If she is everything you want in a wife then what is the problem? I understand your point about newlyweds but its a new chapter in her life. A new marriage. Think of it this way. You will be the only man in her life and many women/men are divorced nowadays. Its just a matter of changing your thinking. Yes it will be a new experience for yourself brother. But having someone experienced will be better. She will be able to explain things and learn from her previous experiences. I hope things get better for you. Wasalam.
  2. salam alaikum, I dont know about the US, but here in the UK, they use pollock. According to Ayatullah Seestani it is halal. Some chains actually mix oils like the one in our local town centre as confirmed by a muslim employee there. However, the other three chains in my town, all exclusively separate the fish from other meat which is great. So we know from first word of mouth from an employee which chain is unreliable. We actually had mcdonalds today funnily enough. I make sure I dont eat from the town shop and order it from the other chains since I heard it.The best thing you can do is ask at the restaurant. So what fish it is and whether it is fried separately inshaAllah.
  3. Salam alaikum, inshaAllah all are well. So from an Islamic point of view, bibi Fatima sa did housework and Imam Ali as and bibi Fizzah helped her. Nowadays, men from different cultures have said "women belong in the kitchen"! This is one of things I wrote in relation to this absurd belief. I'm neither a feminist nor pro men. I am in the middle. It is NOT compulsory for a women to slave away doing all the housework, being stuck in the kitchen all day and being expected to look after all the children. Yes if a man works its understandable she should help too. But a woman deserves freedom, love and equal share in the housework! she can work if she likes and its her money! heck, she can hire a maid and Islam wouldn't have a problem with it. I just hate this ideology especially in some cultures that "women belong in the kitchen!" then men making fun of her food or chucking it out when not cooked to their standards! ugh makes my blood boil! Ive just come to a point in my life where I just feel like many men in my culture have this thinking. Like in my marriage I worked full-time 5-6 days a week, so hard. Yet there were complaints that I wasnt doing housework/cooking etc. Yet he was at home all day. If he managed some cleaning he would make a big deal about it and say actually why did I have to do that. Id come home from a 9 hour shift to "whats for dinner?" We are separated now due to many other reasons but this was his main complaint against me. At times he would throw the whole pot of food out on the floor for making my first pot wrong. Im just so put off with this ideology. ugh. Thoughts?
  4. salam alaikum, InshaAllah you are all well. So many people claim that in order to be loved properly, you have to love yourself. How can one love themselves in such a way that they wont become arrogant? Are there any tips anyone can give to have good self care and love? JazakAllah
  5. thank you for your kindness and prayers Robin.
  6. Fizz786


    salam, why can't advanced members use the mobile chatroom? when I try to send a message it says messages not allowed for my user group? yet I used it once before that? Thanks Fizz786
  7. walaikumsalam wa rahmatullah, thank you for your message Robin. The good thing is we are safe. But the bad thing is whenever I block him he finds another way to contact me. First he messaged/called on withheld number etc. Then he calls my WORKPLACE office! goes on a rant with my colleague. Then more messages calls then emails when I kept blocking him. Then two days ago he emails me saying he was going to kill himself! and that he has taken tablets. I sent the police to the house and I got sent home from my other workplace. The police contact me and say he is "all in order" so then I was really annoyed! then we with difficulty blocked his emails. Then he contacted me from a different email! he is saying he is leaving town. None of what he did before was "real" or authentic. Its just manipulation. he just wont leave us alone.
  8. I found it funny. how kind of you.
  9. salam, it has been confirmed by the police and a life coach that he is a narcissist. And narcissists never change.
  10. lol no. He doesnt. Im not living with him either. so its all cool.
  11. Thank you everyone for your kind support. I am staying with my mother and siblings. They are happy to let me with them until I get my own place inshaAllah. I am safe thank you for asking. They are very supportive as they know what he is really like.
  12. Thank you so much for your support. its so true. its wrong whatever the situation!
  13. I agree brother. The funny thing is he is a sayyid himself! nice hadith. I agree 100% brother. its the only solution. Ive been there, done that. ilahyameen thank you for your duas may Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) bless you.
  14. salam alaikum, inshaAllah you are all well. Thank you for your inputs. So an update, I stupidly went back 6 months ago to give it a chance despite everything that happened. Same rubbish. So blackmailing, emotional abuse, degradation. Now he turned physical. So I said to him to leave. I ended up in hospital due to shock and being unable to speak or move. I was in hospital for four days. I ended contact and he would contact me through various apps, emails, phone calls etc. Then he rings my workplace! and goes on a rant against me. Then the day before yesterday he emailed me saying he is going to kill himself! and has taken tablets to do so. And that he has left behind a note and videos. I had to save his life so sent the police to the house. He was fine they said. Such a nightmare! not to forget manipulative. So its over now. Atleast Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) wont say I didn't try. please pray for me and my three year old son. JazakAllah
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