Hadeel

Depending on the western country that you are in and the institution where you are located, you may well be subject to Equality, Diversity and Inclusion policies. On the plus side this means that women can wear hijab etc without problem and a willingness to make allowances for Ramadhan etc.
On the other side of the coin it means that you cannot overtly criticise other minorities.

I think this discussion is going to end up becoming circular.
@kadhim  as others have pointed out, there is a difference between an individual who happens to be attracted to the same gender, and the modern day ideology that is LGBT. The former has committed no sin as long as they don't act on their desires, while the latter is the active promotion of something that the Qur'an refers to as fahshah, which is often translated as lewdness
@SoRoUsH I don't agree that LGBT is fighting for 'all the rights' and even if this was your argument then recall that the Qur'an instructs us not to mix truth with falsehood.
Just because certain political parties hand us a few incentives does not mean that we should change our stance on principles that are already clearly addressed by our religion. 
 

Countless reasons. Each situation is unique. 
 
Loneliness. It's much worse to feel alone while in a marriage than to feel alone while alone. 
And loneliness comes from lack of friendship in marriage. 
And lack of friendship in marriage probably comes from taking the other for granted. That's easy enough to avoid with good communication and empathy. 

Salam, sorry to hear you are going through this. Alhamdulillah shahr Ramadhan is around the corner which Allah has given us to boost our connection with Him once a year. Start preparing now. Try to fast, make sure you are doing all your wajib and avoiding all haram. Have you listened to any Islamic lectures lately? Are you around other Muslims that can remind you of Allah? Also at times like these sometimes we need a good reminder of death ie our reality. Please read this short book about a real near death experience 3 minutes of judgement day 
I hope that helps a bit. At the very least know I have made dua for you. 

For those who remember Placid. He passed away Feb 28th at 90 3/4 years old.
He was 20 years a small town Blacksmith , 27 years operations manager in a rescue mission, drugs and alcoholism, 25 years retired. His income never reached poverty level, yet he gave his tithe, and able to give much beyond that to people and organizations in need.
He studied the word of God every day since I can remember. He also ministered in some way every day since I can remember. Quite often it was just me, and it was a lecture.
His years as a blacksmith, was before masks became a thing and caught up with him in his 60's and became progressively worse. Dec 23rd he was hospitalized for 32 days, out for two weeks, back in last Thursday, died at 3:10pm Monday in his sleep. 
His years on Shiachat were influential. He looked for unity rather than division and found it. He loved you all.

https://zahratrust.com/united-in-humanity/
 
if anyone can donate, pls do.

My wife's cousin and his elderly father were martyred in the blast. The mosque is located in an overwhelmingly Shia neighburhood where most of the extended family go for Friday prayers and muharram majalis.
It is the same neighbourhood where the famous Shia-Sunni debate took place about a century ago which is known as Peshawar Nights. The above-mentioned momins who were martyred today are the direct descendents of the person in whose house the debate took place. They still own and maintain the house.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Peshawar_Nights
Iltamas-e-dua.

Bismillah, salaam.
 
There was an attack on a Imam Bargah in Peshawar, Pakistan, during Jumu'ah prayers. 30 martyred, over 50 injured. Please pray for the maghfirah of the martyred, well-being and patience for the injured and afflicted families, and of course for the swift advent of our Imam a.j.t.f (عليه السلام) so the enemies of Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى), His Messenger (صلى الله عليه وآله وسلم), and His Messenger's Progeny (عليه السلام) may be brought to 'Adl.
 
Wasalaam.

Allahumma salli ala muhammadiw wa ali muhammadin  wa ajjil faraja hum
Rabbinee lima anzalta ilayya min khayrin faqir
Allahumma innee urreedu an atazawwaja faqaddir lee minan nisaa-I a’fihunna farjajan wa ah’fadh’ihunna lee fee nafsihaa wa awsa-i-hunna lee rizwan wa a-dhamahunna lee barakatan fee nafsihaa wa maaleee faqaddir lee minhaa waladan tayyiban tajaluhoo khalafan saalihan fee hayaatee wa ba`da mawtee.
Oh Allah! I desire to marry, so arrange for me a woman from those who willingly abstain from what is unlawful and who safeguards her soul for my sake and because of her, not only my means of sustenance will increase, but also make there be in it abundance and also make it sure that she will give me a virtuous son, who will be a noble successor in my life and after my death.
Ya Rabb, help me in finding a good wife in the same boat as me, who also understands and accepts me as I am. May she find peace and be filled with joy wherever she goes. May she have the strength and courage to find me, love me and live with me. May she find and be filled with much wisdom and clarity in her words and from her experiences. May she in her kindness, share these experiences with me and help us grow together.  Verily with hardship comes ease. (إِنَّ مَعَ الْعُسْرِ يُسْرًا - 94:6)
Ya Rabb, You alone know what is truly in my heart. You alone know my struggles and pain, Al-Wadud. I feel unbearably lonely and do not wish to incur Your displeasure by remaining unmarried, Al-'Aziz!

I've been a guest in this site for some quite time and never really thought of sharing my art but that's going to change.
 I'm very glad to share some with the Shiachat community:
Unveil your soul

 
 @ireallywannaknow  
 

From Sayyid Ali Al-Sistani: 
873. A number of things are Mustahab for the dress of a person who offers prayers. Some of these are: Turban, along with its final fold passed under the chin; loose garment on the shoulder ('Aba); white dress; and cleanest dress; use of perfume, and wearing an Aqeeq (Agate).
https://www.Sistani.org/english/book/48/2211/   

There may or may not be a punishment per Hukm Sharia. If causes any injuries during the course of the act, even non permenant injuries like a red mark, he has to compensate her monitarily for that injury. 
If there is no permenant or non permenant injury, then there is no Hukm Sharia or Kaffarah due, but that doesnt mean it isnt haram and liable for punishment in other forms. All haram is punished unless it is forgiven by Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى). This punisment could take many different forms, either in this world or the next.
If a wife is constantly refusing her husband for not legitimate reasons he has the option to be patient and examine his behaviour toward her. Many times when he reflects on how he treats his wife, in general, he will realize the reason why she is refusing and try to change his behaviour toward her, ie treat her kindly, generously, and with respect and appreciation. If he reflects, changes his behaviour, and she still persists in her refusal, he has the option of divorce and / or marry another wife.  So there is no Islamically legitimate reason to commit this act because Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) has given him many options and choices to avoid this

Simon this is not the first time you have assumed something wrong of some of the brothers and sisters on this site, you need to take it a bit easy. We all here follow the Ahlul Bayt. Though if you really thought that her advice she gave was wrong then you could write why you thought so, without saying ''We don't need your advice on divorce and marriage''. She was being honest and you are being honest too, but you misunderstood. Bowtie Included. 
Lately there have been a We and You attitude in this site, it needs to stop. I wan't to remind people to read surat Hujurat. 
(I am an avid reader of shiachat)
   

Simon this is not the first time you have assumed something wrong of some of the brothers and sisters on this site, you need to take it a bit easy. We all here follow the Ahlul Bayt. Though if you really thought that her advice she gave was wrong then you could write why you thought so, without saying ''We don't need your advice on divorce and marriage''. She was being honest and you are being honest too, but you misunderstood. Bowtie Included. 
Lately there have been a We and You attitude in this site, it needs to stop. I wan't to remind people to read surat Hujurat. 
(I am an avid reader of shiachat)
   

Why do people lose faith when they live around non-Muslims?
My faith actually gets stronger around non-Muslims.

No, you’ve misunderstood. I’d been with him for two years prior to marriage (in a relationship) and I was friends with him before that. Our engagement lasted a week. 
I’ve been married a year. I met my husband when I was 20, (and I’ll be 24 this year) and he was 26. We got together when I was 21 and he was 27. 
I think I know something about relationships, especially within today’s society—where people hop from partner to partner in the West, and the Ummah who marry for status and men who disrespect them but then stay married.
Stop assuming things which you have no knowledge about. 
 

What on Earth is wrong with everyone? Seriously. Keep your condescending and rude opinions to yourself. If you're jealous then keep your envy to yourself. No need to drag everyone down with you. Be thankful that someone is actually giving some sincere advice to people who might actually need it. 

Many of the topics I discuss may be somewhat undesirable for many Muslims. It's not only in ShiaChat, but in my local community. I may be wrong, but there is indeed a good intention behind this, partly based on my very own experience. I was raised by a very strict father, and I was even stricter than him in terms of religion (never missed the 51 rakats nor daily morning duas, nor allowed leisure time based on anything else than philosophical and theological books). Yet still I exploded and fell into sin because I wasn't realizing I was repressing my ideas and my nafs unjustly, and I felt proud of that. 
Many youth within our communities develop a lot of questions and doubts regarding not only their religion, but their social customs, roles, interactions, taboos, etc. And oftenly, they don't separate religion from that, because both come from the SAME source: parents. At certain point, these customs start clashing with their goals and lifestyle (haram partying, early arranged marriages, etc.). If it wasn't for these clashes, they wouldn't start questioning their faith, how they experiment it, how their families follow Islam, etc. Can't go sleep to my friend's house, nor go partying with friends, nor avoid arranged marriage with an Iraqi or whatever culture I feel little to no connection to it, etc. These youth may also, at the same time, be discriminated for being Muslims, and judged by ideas conmonly defended by Muslims (views on feminism, women's role in society, lgbt issues, etc.).
This is an unevitable secularist force, that we may shun with bad words, or start talking openly about it. And this is done with reasonable ideas (not merely based on Islam, because Westerners know no Islam). We have to shield youth with a mentality and a logic that may make them able to argue and defend the ideas they were educated in by Islam, IN CASE they feel comfortable with them (otherwise they just don't believe in Islam, and that is up to Allah to guide or not guide people).
The point of all this is not to change Islam, but to leave the doors of debate always open, with good manners instead of prejudices against Western ideas, nor censorship, nor backwards mentality. This, my friends, will encourage youth not to develop an extreme reaction against Islam and their culture altogether when circumstances are against them. And this reaction, the more extreme it is, the harder it is to return to Islam. And we will want to return, for sure we will, when the strength of youth is not present, nor the ferocity of innovative ideas, nor revolutionary movements nor the passion of making new friends and develop new ideas. When sickness and weakness, and the shadow of death is our only companion in solitude, when we feel really useless, at that time, we will want to go back to the God we unjustly forgot.
Many SCers have precisely contacted me when they started feeling doubts, when they started "that phase". I'm not so much worried with the phase, but with the idea of forgetting God and Islam, closing the door. We may have our times where we forgot our prayers, focus on friends and work and fun. But be careful with leaving religion completely forgotten. Always keep something with you, leave the door open, consider you will want to go back and focus on your faith. Leave that good niyyah in you.
There may be many points you feel hard to accept, many of them probably social rather than religious (as the recently discussed women's social issues). Be open, discuss whatever you like, share your opinions, find someone to hear them. Don't feel apart, don't feel an alien within the Islamic community, as it is more diverse and more welcoming than you would ever expect if you keep trying. You will find people like you, who hold a special place for Islam in their hearts, with whom you will feel not alone, and you will see that the beauty you found in this religion isn't necessarily linked with what may make you hate your life, your origins or your family's customs.
Youth in my local community have almost entirely left Islam. Saying this because it's way easier and less hard to prevent this than to fix it. Let's put things easier for youth to speak out their doubts, their worries, their desires and interests in life, let's try to judge less, let's make an effort to understand nowaday mentality, see why it matters and why it convinces so many youth people.
It's hard to reach conviction without doubt. Doubt is the principle of any talib al ilm. So instead of repressing your doubts and yourself out of external pressure, consider being open, question anything that clashes with your life, and use your reason to find the best of all ideas and approaches. In this convenient way, pressure won't kill you nor make you have undesirable reactions towards your society, family, religion, and, in the end, against yourself.

Yeah, I've watched The Makinations, it's a good series.  

The makinations (it’s a God work from Islamicpulse but is a little harsh & not recommended for children +18]
 

Salam Alaykum
I have an interesting psychology article that may contribute to this topic. I don't like anything that has to do with ''humanist'' extremely atheist Sweden and getting the answers of my religion from there is not something that I approve to either. But I really bursted out in sarcastic laugh(sorry) when I read the article.
The original article is in swedish (https://fof.se/tidning/2019/1/artikel/jamlika-man-och-kvinnor-ar-mer-olika), this one is translated: 
''When people themselves estimate their personalities, the differences between the sexes are greater in equal countries. It is evident from a study in which men and women in 22 countries have had to estimate their personality traits within what is commonly referred to as psychology as "Big Five": openness, conscientiousness, extroversion / introversion, benevolence and emotionality.
The differences between men and women in countries with a high degree of gender equality were greatest. Women in these countries especially rated the characteristics of benevolence and extroversion higher than men.
- We got a relatively strong connection, says Erik Mac Giolla, researcher in psychology at the University of Gothenburg and associate professor at the Högskolan Väst and the main author of the study.
- This is really nothing new - we have seen similar results in several major studies over the past 15 years.
In other studies it has been found that gender differences in the choice of education follow similar patterns.
- In Sweden, for example, there are fewer women in engineering education than in Algeria, says Erik Mac Giolla. This is in line with our results.
Exactly why this is so is difficult to say. It has long been thought that gender differences should decrease with increased gender equality.
- There are theories that the biological differences become clearer when gender equality increases. Others argue that increased gender equality can make the gender identity more important, which can explain that men and women then make different choices, says Erik Mac Giolla.
Repeated studies over time could find the mechanisms behind this. If one can follow countries that become more equal over time, one can see if, and how, men's and women's preferences change.
- At the moment we do not know if this has happened over time, says Erik Mac Giolla. We can only state that more equal countries have greater gender differences in these issues.
How have your results been received?
- As I said, this is nothing new in personality research. I don't think this is controversial, but many social scientists and humanists seem to think so. So it depends on who you ask, but my feeling is that in Sweden many mean that this is controversial. Our study has received great attention internationally, but not in Swedish media.
Why is this controversial do you think?
- I don't know, says Erik Mac Giolla. But I think the results go against some form of consensus on the gender roles.
The results are based on surveys with over 130,000 people aged 19 to 69 in 22 different countries, and are published in the International Journal of Psychology.''
2018-11-03 
 

We gave up on staying on topic long ago. We're just rolling with it, like free form poetry. 

I've been a guest in this site for some quite time and never really thought of sharing my art but that's going to change.
 I'm very glad to share some with the Shiachat community:
Unveil your soul

 
 @ireallywannaknow  
 

It is certainly a time of mass apostasy. They were less common before, but they were there, and they mostly kept to themselves. The internet enabled people with doubts in one community to connect and organize with people from other countries. There have always been secular / non-practicing Muslims, but now they have the room to come out of the closet completely and organize themselves.
I don't use the label ex-Muslim, because you're either a Muslim or not. Most atheists and agnostics don't call themselves ex-Christians. The ex-Muslim label is designed to be subversive, and get attention, and give onlookers the impression that this person has special insight on Islam. For the most part, these apostates were unknown in the Muslim community, and were probably already secular; all they needed was a little push. And with the rise of atheism, academia (which is predicated on naturalism), radical feminism, LGBT rights, hook-up culture, drug normalization, and "live and let live" lifestyles, they got the push that they needed. This is the weakest and most divided the Muslim Umma has ever been, so many just want to latch onto alternative narratives and powers.
I probably know about a dozen or so apostates in my immediate circle, and maybe 50 or 60 Muslims who stopped practicing altogether. It's a big problem where I live. I don't give up on them, but one category are just foam that will go wherever the sea will take them, while the other (smaller) category are vile, destructive people.