MartyS

Nineteen years ago...
My twin sister had a dream or vision (she said she didn't know if she was asleep or awake) a week or two before she died. She saw herself lying on the floor. A man picked her up and held her in his arms. She believed it was Jesus. She said she didn't hear the word, but she felt the word, "Redeemed." She said it washed over her with so much power she thought in that moment Jesus was healing her from her cancer. But when the dream or vision ended, she realized she was still very sick, and she knew it wasn't that kind of healing. She never feared dying, especially after her dream. I am grateful she shared her dream with me...for I now have cancer, too.

Nineteen years ago...
My twin sister had a dream or vision (she said she didn't know if she was asleep or awake) a week or two before she died. She saw herself lying on the floor. A man picked her up and held her in his arms. She believed it was Jesus. She said she didn't hear the word, but she felt the word, "Redeemed." She said it washed over her with so much power she thought in that moment Jesus was healing her from her cancer. But when the dream or vision ended, she realized she was still very sick, and she knew it wasn't that kind of healing. She never feared dying, especially after her dream. I am grateful she shared her dream with me...for I now have cancer, too.

Interesting
Do you know why he revealed himself to her in particular? Is there a meaning to his choice or is it just random? 
Let's say a person dreams about Noah a.s and another person dreams about Jesus a.s. Is there a message to the one who dreams about a particular prophet that is related to that particular prophet? 

Wa aleykom alsalam,
In John 4:1-41 of the Injeel, Jesus, a Jew, surprised a particular non-Jewish woman of Samaria by speaking to her. He chose to reveal His identity to her.

I always feel so guilty when i miss the fajr prayer
I always feel so guilty when i do any sin
I feel it on my shoulders,its too much to bear
even when i ask for forgiveness i feel like i wasn’t sincere enough 

I have no knowledge in philosophical questions but my first thoughts were these,
Why does Allah SWT have to have a reason to exist? Aren't you limiting God when asking such a question? 
We humans need to have a reason to exist but Allah SWT does not. You cannot use the same rules that are applied to the creation on the Creator himself. To me this seems like comparing the Creator to his creation. We have limits. God does not. You can't force any rules upon God. 

ive been depressed for a long time. i pray and ask Allah to help me but everday seems to get worse. sometimes i feel like Allah is not helping me cause i was not really a good person when i was younger (im 17 now). i started praying to Allah when i was 15 and ever sinice that age ive been just sad. i know suffer from health condition, spine problems, i live in pain everyday.i also fear the future i always think that im going to be alone forever because im an introvert and me being quiet botheres people and its just so hard.is there like any dua that can help me that can get Allah to answer and accept my prayers because i read so many duas over the years and i guess none of them helped. 
https://www.shiachat.com/forum/topic/235056697-the-sadness-never-ends/

When a woman who had been caught in the act of adultery was brought to Jesus, her accusers asked if she should be stoned...
"And as they continued to ask him, he stood up and said to them, 'Let him who is without sin among you be the first to throw a stone at her.'" - John 8:7 (from the Injeel, the words of Jesus)

Ruth to Naomi?  How was that relationship like?
I hope you feel better.  Thank you for joining Sc to share your experience.
I hope your son continues to see you and he should bring his baby with him when he visits you as well.

Firstly, you can't control your feelings. Secondly, what differentiates a "good" Muslim from a "bad" Muslim is how they deal with worldly desires and what they know is truly good for them- Allah. 
Non-muslims are not demons. The OP hasn't even specified if the guy is ahl al kitab (it wouldn't make a difference in consideration to their potential relationship, but those religions are also word of god). 
So, according to you, if you simply love a non-Muslim, you have no love for Allah and you might as well be a kaffir?
Do you see how damaging this thought process is?

Hello there sisters and brothers,
I'm a fellow sister who is in the dark right now. I love Allah with all my heart and soul and wish nothing but for his blessings. However I am in a bit of a conundrum right now as this topic is very touchy and quite unusual. Please do try to understand that I'm looking for solutions so I would appreciate if you would not attack me. I don't know what else I am supposed to do at this point in time. 2 years ago I had my nikha done with this man that is wonderful. However I really don't know what changed in my heart but after leaving for overseas my actions became regretful to me. Ever since I have not talked to him and have fallen in love with someone else who is a non Muslim. My thoughts of wrong doing has been consuming me and I'm not so sure what I should be doing at this point. If any brothers and sister could give me possible advice as to how I should approach this. 
Thanks.

You can't assume what's in her heart. She can be a better Muslim than all of us. 
Everyone makes mistakes. She hasn't clearly stated that she's cheated on her husband. She said she had feelings for someone else, we don't know if she acted on them, so why assume the worst? 
Instead of pointing fingers and being so judgemental why don't you offer her the advice she wanted? 
 

Thanks for sharing @Abu Hadi. Could you share the reference to this ayat? It sounds very familiar, reminding me a lot of this verse from the Injeel:
No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it.
1 Corinthians 10:13

Salam Aleikum brothers and sisters,
(I apologize if this is a long read, but I am desperate for help and advice because I really do not have anyone to talk to. The main reason I came here is just so I can explain everything without hopefully being judged but also get some advice.) 
I am going through extreme despair/hopelessness in my life mainly due to my family life, but also due to a lot of regrets and decisions I have taken in the past. I really want change in my life, I am 25 years old now and I feel lost and on the verge of giving up on life completely!
a brief background..
I came to Canada at a very young age with my family (parents, 4 brothers and one younger sister). My family is not very, religious only my mom and I pray, fast etc. My parents and family back in my home country are very attached to their culture and are very proud of their own race. The biggest problem for me is that my parents(family ) are not educated, only my father finished highschool and was planning to do nursing when his father (my grandpa) died. So he had to work and support his large family to this day.
I love my parents and all the hardships they went through to bring us to a safe country to get education, and better our lives. However, I feel that they do not know how to adjust to life here although it has been 17 years we have lived in Canada.  They are extremely strict towards me especially because I am a female, I thought they would change when I grow older, but even until now I am 25 years old, I can't even go out with my friends without stuttering and telling my father where I am going and with whom. I was 23, and I told my father I am going to the mall with my friend and he dropped me in the subway station, before I reached the mall my father took my mom and came to the same mall which is 30 minutes drive. In the mall he called me and said which store am I in, I asked my mom why did you guys came but I know she made an excuse and said your father wanted to shop too. But I did not believe her obviously because he wanted to know with whom I am with and if I actually told the truth. He told me to meet him in front of the store, I went there and took my friend also just for them to see that I am with a girl, and I did come to where I said I would go.
Everyday when I go to school, I must come home immediately after my classes.  when I was working in retail store he knew when and what time I finish. I have had countless, teary arguments with my mother asking her why I am controlled so much, I need to breath I can't even do basic things being a 25 year old woman. She says, we have seen alot of youth/ girls go in the wrong way, do wrong things we just do not want our kids to go astray in this country too. 
I always felt deeply sad when my friends say that they have a very open, friendly relationship with their parents and siblings. I long for that but I can never ever have that kind of a relationship because my parents are not educated, they do not know how to speak to us to get their message across (although I know their intention is good) but they are extremely strict and controlling especially to me (oldest daughter). My father used to hit my mother, my aunts used to hit me and my siblings because we lived in the same house in my home country. My mother was always afraid of my father. To make matters even worse, my oldest brother and I never talk, he will hit me if I disagree with him, and I do not feel at all attached or feel that I can communicate with him because he looked up to my dad. The message my father tells my brothers is that when they marry, their wives must stay at home, and the moment they fight or disrespect your family, parents etc  slap them once and do not let them control you. .....( This always hurts me because it is messages like this that have made my relationship with my brothers distant and cold, because they also are not open minded or friendly).
I just wished they would understand that  being highly controlling and strict does not mean pious kids who won't lie or do anything wrong behind them. I am going to be honest and confess that I have  lied, and  have  been in many haram relationships because that is where I felt free, felt comfort expressing my feelings and getting back my so called view of "affection and love" from other guys/men. I just felt joy when I knew I was out of the house, and felt free even though I lied very well about my whereabouts especially when my father went overseas. I felt happy when I was sad or cried and someone took my hand and said I am here for you. I am not blaming my sins only to my parents, yes it is my fault and my own choices but please understand that I just wanted love,some freedom, someone to feel close to and talk to. My mother never talked about marriage with me because she is shy or awkward about it. Therefore I never opened up either. The only thing my parents ever spoke about was just get your education. Not religion, not marriage, not asking how I feel and what to expect in the future, how my day is, or why I look sad if they noticed. 
Beginning of university until now I have changed majors, I have severe depression, feel extremely lonely. Been in many haram relationships that led to heartbreaks, rejection. I feel like I am scarred for the rest of my life. I DO NOT want to marry anyone from my country, I have no interest, I am not attracted to them even if they are "good" guys. I feel like they are allll like my father and brothers. I want to marry outside of my culture. I feel that even if I force myself to marry someone from my culture I cannot. The problem now is my family is completely opposite of me. It is a big shame if I marry anyone not from my culture, country, city etc......My father would kill me if I tell him I want to marry a good man, who is pious, loves Allah, the prophet and his family, but who is from a different culture and speaks a different language. 
Some of the relationships I was in, I had to break off because they asked to speak to my parents and get married. But I was so scared of my brothers and father that I could no longer carry on the relationship and break it off. There was one guy who was very kind, generous and pious that I met while volunteering at a mosque. He immediately wanted to meet my parents and I meet his family, and keep everything from day one halal and with the intention of marriage, that I left him as well because I knew it is impossible for my father to accept that marriage. Why did I start a relationship with him in the first place knowing that? Because I thought I can learn something from him, get close to god, and most importantly get some comfort and someone to talk to. Now he married a girl from my mosque, who is from my country but her family is so open minded and accepting that they approved him even though he is from a different cultural background and speaks a different language. In another mosque ladies asked my mother if I would get a chance to get to know their sons' for marriage but my mom obviously did not accept. 
What should I do now that I am 25? I have no one in my life. I am tired of temporary relationships, tired of being depressed. I cannot get even simple tasks done, I do not want to leave my bed in the morning, I always want to be alone. I am back in school with 40k debt, I am jobless because I quit my job at a bank because I was so depressed, lacked confidence to have conversations and relationships with coworkers. I was not like this before but as time went by until now, I am scared to get a new job because I feel like I cannot do the job, cannot have friends. I am always upset and feel COMPLETELY EMPTY. 
I started wearing the hijab last Ramadan to push myself to become a better person, and hopefully Allah swt can forgive me for my severe sins. But I am back in the spiral, no change has come except more depression. I know it is haram to feel hopeless but I just want one thing from God, change in my life. I want to meet the person I will get married to, make my parents accept him for his piety and goodness not be racist towards him and reject him just because he does not come from the same cultural background. My parents SPECIFICALLY want me to marry someone from their city, their ethnic background and preferably from a family they know. That would be a complete nightmare for me...
I have always prayed, listened to lectures, attended mosque, learned about religion but my depression and hopelessness due to my family (parents') expectations I have felt completely numb. I feel that I am just dreaming about miracles, that my parents would change, ill get a job ill atleast be happy to work in and not be rejected and somehow I may marry the right person who I would love and would be from my own choice....but I know it is false hopes. I am getting older but getting nowhere in my life, drowning in debt, jobless, lonely and depressed. I tried talking to my mom several times, but it only led to me locking myself in my room and just crying because my mom has no power but also has a strict, old, cultural mentality herself. She cannot help me. My brothers cannot help me. My father and I cannot talk about these things openly because he is not like that, he was not brought up that way. My younger sister I am afraid is going in the same path I went, she is hiding alot of things and I try to teach her and help her, but if the entire family environment is messed up, she is in the same situation as me. 
Please help me, tell me what should I do? It is Ramadan and I am fasting, I promise my intention is pure for my future. I just want to live a normal life, get married with someone I will love, start a family, I want to work at a job I will feel accomplished, I want to help the less fortunate and make even a small difference in someones' life, but I feel like a complete FAILURE. I do not have the job, or money to help the poor. I am drowning in debt too.  I am tired of not having someone to genuinely talk to and be with. I AM ALWAYS THINKING OF GIVING UP AND JUST LEAVING THIS WORLD. But I know it will be a grave sin, and I know that Allah swt is compassionate and merciful, and that would be selfish and ungrateful of me to do. But I just do not know for how long will I keep living like this, will I end up lonely? (I can never force myself to marry the man they choose for me, it is impossible and it seems like their mentality won't change either). Should I believe in miracles?
I am desperate for your advice and responses brothers and sisters.

Assalam Alaikum. If I may share with you from the perspective of an American grandmother who also has a daughter-in-law, I understand how difficult it is to separate a young woman who is having her first child from her mother. I learned of a wise custom among the Fulani people in Nigeria, while visiting there years ago, that has helped me. I was told that when a new Fulani bride gives birth to her first child, she goes back home to live with her mother and remains there until the child is two years old. Her mother teaches her how to care for the baby and the new mother continues to mature as a young woman under the care and teaching of her own mother before returning to her husband and extended family. I have had to be patient with my daughter-in-law, deferring to her mother, just loving her and not giving too much advice. But now, as I am old and dying from cancer, that daughter-in-law has become to me like Ruth was to her mother-in-law Naomi in the book of Ruth in the Bible. I pray your daughter-in-law will be such a blessing to you. Marty
Naomi was living in a foreign land with her husband and two sons and their wives. Her husband and both sons died. She decided to go back to her home country and bid her daughters-in-law farewell. One of them, Ruth, refused to abandon her mother-in-law, choosing instead to go with Naomi and become, herself, a foreigner in Naomi's homeland. Ruth told Naomi, "Do not urge me to leave you or to return from following you. For where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there will I be buried. May the LORD do so to me and more also if anything but death parts me from you." - Ruth 1:16-17

Assalam Alaikum. If I may share with you from the perspective of an American grandmother who also has a daughter-in-law, I understand how difficult it is to separate a young woman who is having her first child from her mother. I learned of a wise custom among the Fulani people in Nigeria, while visiting there years ago, that has helped me. I was told that when a new Fulani bride gives birth to her first child, she goes back home to live with her mother and remains there until the child is two years old. Her mother teaches her how to care for the baby and the new mother continues to mature as a young woman under the care and teaching of her own mother before returning to her husband and extended family. I have had to be patient with my daughter-in-law, deferring to her mother, just loving her and not giving too much advice. But now, as I am old and dying from cancer, that daughter-in-law has become to me like Ruth was to her mother-in-law Naomi in the book of Ruth in the Bible. I pray your daughter-in-law will be such a blessing to you. Marty
Naomi was living in a foreign land with her husband and two sons and their wives. Her husband and both sons died. She decided to go back to her home country and bid her daughters-in-law farewell. One of them, Ruth, refused to abandon her mother-in-law, choosing instead to go with Naomi and become, herself, a foreigner in Naomi's homeland. Ruth told Naomi, "Do not urge me to leave you or to return from following you. For where you go I will go, and where you lodge I will lodge. Your people shall be my people, and your God my God. Where you die I will die, and there will I be buried. May the LORD do so to me and more also if anything but death parts me from you." - Ruth 1:16-17

Assalam Alaikum,I do not know if this chat is allowed but I am going to ask anyway as I am very despirate.  My husband is Iraqi and I am American.  My son is married to a Christian girl and they are expecting a child.  Her family is very hateful and really dislikes my son and I know they are going to hurt him somehow.  We are planning or moving to [Gulf country] and she is refusing to go with us.    Her family has already put a spell on him so he would return to her and it was done the Mexican way and negasa.  I am asking for help to put a spell (lack of a better word) on her to come with us to [Gulf country] and leave her family behind as they dislike Islam and my son.  I am not asking to hurt his wife I am asking for her to join our family and move with us to [Gulf country] so we can live as a family with her, my son and baby.  I want nothing bad to happen and only want help doing this the good way.  But I need something strong and quick as we need to leave by mid August and I do not want to leave them in the United States.  I am scared what will happen to them both.  We love them both and have welcomed her with open arms.I am in [City removed], Texas and really need help. Any one that can help me please contact me or text me. Thank you
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