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In the Name of God بسم الله

YungHijazi

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  1. My Prayers
    YungHijazi got a reaction from Reza in My laziness is preventing me from praying. Need help.   
    My laziness has been preventing me from praying and it's been only getting worse these last 2 months...
    I need some serious help getting back into doing it because I feel like im degrading spiritually, mentally and physically. For some reason I just can't quite put my mind to it and do it I don't know why but I find it so damn difficult.
    I know some of you are gonna think "this is stupid and not that serious", but its gotten so bad for me that I need to ask here for help.
    Does anyone know what I should do? Tips, advice, or maybe even direct me to some verses in the quran that describes this problem or maybe even offer the soloution.
  2. Like
    YungHijazi got a reaction from shia farm girl in My laziness is preventing me from praying. Need help.   
    My laziness has been preventing me from praying and it's been only getting worse these last 2 months...
    I need some serious help getting back into doing it because I feel like im degrading spiritually, mentally and physically. For some reason I just can't quite put my mind to it and do it I don't know why but I find it so damn difficult.
    I know some of you are gonna think "this is stupid and not that serious", but its gotten so bad for me that I need to ask here for help.
    Does anyone know what I should do? Tips, advice, or maybe even direct me to some verses in the quran that describes this problem or maybe even offer the soloution.
  3. My Prayers
    YungHijazi got a reaction from Hameedeh in My laziness is preventing me from praying. Need help.   
    My laziness has been preventing me from praying and it's been only getting worse these last 2 months...
    I need some serious help getting back into doing it because I feel like im degrading spiritually, mentally and physically. For some reason I just can't quite put my mind to it and do it I don't know why but I find it so damn difficult.
    I know some of you are gonna think "this is stupid and not that serious", but its gotten so bad for me that I need to ask here for help.
    Does anyone know what I should do? Tips, advice, or maybe even direct me to some verses in the quran that describes this problem or maybe even offer the soloution.
  4. Like
    YungHijazi reacted to ali_fatheroforphans in I wish to avoid both marriage and zina but cant   
    Abstaining from masturbation will not magically help you connect with women if you still isolate yourself. As you said 'connecting with people', be they men or women is your problem, then you really have to force yourself to be more social. Apart from abstaining from masturbation, try to spend less time on social media as it is a big waste of time. Step outside, and interact with people. I know it might be annoying and uncomfortable at first, but you'll definitely love it eventually. You'll come across a lot of cool people who'll share common interests with you. Therefore, don't let your mind trick you into thinking that 'you can't connect with people'. Humans by nature love forming bonds with people, and even you do. Maybe you just haven't found the right ones!
    Sorry to say this, but maybe some people don't feel connected to you, given that your social skills are bad (you know more than me). If people don't feel connected with you, then you'll not feel connected with them too. Therefore, there is a possibility that you might need to brush up your social skills.
  5. Like
    YungHijazi reacted to Abu Hadi in I wish to avoid both marriage and zina but cant   
    I think marriage / not marriage is not you main problem. IMHO, your main problem is the fact that you can't get attached to people. If you can't find at least a few people that you enjoy spending time with, then you need to work on that first. That is a symptom of a very bad spiritual problem. I don't want to say it, because maybe I am misreading the intention behind your post. But you need think about why you can't get attached to people. 
    Also, if you get married, that doesn't mean you and your spouse become Siamese twins, lol.  You can still spend time alone. If you spend time actively working on having a good relationship with your spouse, you will actually enjoy spending time with her (some people call this 'Love'). 
    The reason why marriage is the most mustahab of all the mustahabat but at the same time not wajib is for a few reasons. 
    Why it is not wajib is because there are some people who really (for one reason or another) can't get married for a certain period of time. Since not doing the wajibat results in punishment from Allah(s.w.a), Allah(s.w.a) would never punish someone for not doing something which they did not have ability to do, because Allah(s.w.a) is Just. At the same time, there are very few people who are actually in this extreme situation and very many people who make excuses and justifications as to why they can't get married when they actually can, and this has become very fashionable these days amoung the ummah, with devastating consequences, as you can probably see. 
    It is very mustahab because there are so many benefits, both spiritually, physically and socially. The spiritual benefit is the greatest and most profound of all the benefits, which is why anyone who is at all interested in progressing spiritually should be married. There are too many hadith regarding this, but if you are still not convinced I will post some. As it says in the Holy Quran, 'your spouse is a clothing(covering for you)', meaning that cloths are meant to cover your defects and protect you from cold, heat, sunlight, and the prying eyes of others. In the same way, your spouse protects you and covers your defects and this protections allows you to focus on your relationship with Allah(s.w.a). Also, when you physical needs are satisfied, you have more focus and more energy to focus on the important things in life, like developing your relationship with Allah(s.w.a) and making a good life for yourself and your family. Without the level of protection, covering of defects, and physical satisfaction that marriage provides, you are constantly fighting a battle against your nafs, constantly losing focus, and constantly having your defects exposed (either to yourself or others) so all this distracts you from the real purpose of life, which is to progress spiritually. But wait....there's more
    We are created by Allah(s.w.a) to live in groups, in families, communities, and nations, not as individuals. Marriage is the basis or building block of society. With healthy marriages come a healthy family, a healthy community, and a healthy society. From lack of marriage or unhealthy marriages comes an unhealthy family and an unhealthy society. When you get married and work to maintain a healthy marriage, you are actually contributing to the community and society where you live, in addition to progressing spiritually as an individual. You are actually making the world a better place. Isn't that neat ! In addition to your personal reward from Allah(s.w.a), you are also rewarded for the benefits you give to the society where you live thru your marriage. One of these benefits is good children, which is Sadaqat jariyya, but there are others also. You are actually helping the religion of Islam itself to continue and flourish. You will only live a certain number of years and then you will die, and your individual capacity for gaining hasanat will be over, unless you grow that hasanat thru Sadaqat jarriaya and the easiest way to do this is thru a healthy marriage. 
    Some people say that, well what if your children grow up to be bad people ? 
    The answer is that Allah(s.w.a) rewards or punishes based on your niyyat(intention followed up by action in the direction of your intention), not the result. If your niyyat is to raise good children and you take all necessary and reasonable steps to do that, then you will be rewarded. Also, many times children go thru a phase in their life where they go 'off track' but later on regain their Iman and end up becoming good people who do good in the society. 
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