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In the Name of God بسم الله

shouzan

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Everything posted by shouzan

  1. First don't Listen to people about divorce! It really is the LAST resort, as for your MIL please try to speak with your husband, no one has a right to demand, order or make issues with you over seeing your friends and family. ESPECIALLY going out with your husband, your MIL sounds like a nasty old hypocrite. If she is really a devoted muslim I suggest you research and get some Quran verses that support her shutting up and minding her own business and not gossiping and making you uncomfortable. You are in your home with your husband yet she makes you feel like an outsider and you don't belong, Why because your white? reverted? not good enough for her Son? Well im Damn sure her son chose YOU! and inshallah he will chose your side. Speak to him ASAP if he will not accept you move to a nice flat somewhere and see his family one a week (Which to be honest is the norm for most muslim middle eastern families i know) for dinner and quality time than take ur phone and record your MIL doing nasty and bad things than get ur things and leave to your parents. Go speak to Mosque and seek guidance. If he doesn't try to resolve the issues HIS family caused than he honestly isn't worth it. Also girl Stop cooking, Cleaning, etc. I wonder even if they are using you as a free Maid or something. I don't mind normal house work but you seem to be the only one doing everything around that house and i have a small voice in my head saying "He married for to take care of their home and his parents" weird i know but there are SICK people out there.
  2. Star can't participate in the conversation anymore because her only argument is as u said. it is unfortunate because i wish ignorant people won't accept actual ideas. Just as Western society discriminates agains muslims and women in Hijab people like Star and other muslims Discriminates agains Non Hijab wearing Muslims, Does this seem at all okay with anyone with a brain? STOP Judging others, none us are without sins!
  3. A woman can ask for a divorce that is certain i am not sure what the requirements are for one however i am sorry.
  4. Watch this share it is important that all muslims have their basic human rights to practice their religion. http://ctv.news/IAkDkzTN.S. woman claims potential wedding venue violated her religious freedoms A Dartmouth woman claims a local hotel is infringing on her freedom of religion by not offering appropriate food for her wedding reception.
  5. What? a woman can ask for divorce just go to courts. Maybe different because i am in Canada, however i had a difficult nikah contract and i went to civil court and divorced. it wasn't easy but it was done. I suggest if your country won't allow you to do so, make headache for him until he gives tallaq, sorry guys but men can be very simple when it comes to touching their nerves and if u push him hard enough he will say it.
  6. In regards to these quotes from the Quran, it doesn't solidify your point Star, it just means to listen and be aware of the messages of Allah and the messengers. To which i believe we can all agree, however it still comes down to the freewill Allah has given us to make the choice we wish in our life. A person knows murder is bad but if they do murder on their own freewill and choice it is between them and Allah. You have not been given any authority by Allah to Command me to do anything, since according to you i MUST FOLLOW! Allah gave me a brain I chose to use my mind to read and understand full before i do anything. and yes this includes putting on a hijab. If i put it on to simply please everyone else and because i am told i have to, what does this make me? Not a strong muslimah woman, instead it makes me into a coward who isn't brave enough to make my own choice and decision. Sunni's don't encourage research and don't allow them to Question anything their scholars have said. We as Shia know the importance of research and understanding of islam and the Quran, that is why we have scholars do we not? they dedicate their lives to understanding the teachings and principals to which islam is based. Why am i not entitled to the same understanding?
  7. Of course i do know what Nikah mutah is, however if this is something neither he or I feel the desire to do a nikah mutah. We will do a long engagement period so it will basically be during this time we will spend properly getting to know eachother.
  8. Why would we need Mutah if we both love and understand eachother and wish to have full Nikah. i understand the concern though thank you.
  9. You can't reply because you have no actual replay to Quran verses stating we have freewill. infact many many of my discussions with you you don't actually reply any of the valid point you simply reply a small point you take issue with. Again you can't argue the clear words of the Quran, and You are judging me right there in your own words as quoted. You are Takfir because you think less of me for not wearing hijab and you can't even bring urself to reply any logical point have because you are Judging me, hypocrisy is what it is.
  10. I completely agree, and consider this common saying "To love someone means putting their needs before your own regardless if it hurts or pains you" He thinks i am the best mother and my children are the best behaved he has ever seen, he has told me he prays that when he and i have children Allah will bless them with the same good behaviour as i have raised my children extremely well and i have done all of it alone. According to him. He is active in my children lives, and attends doctors appointments, school functions etc. I put my children first before him this is true but he is a very close second in my life and i do a lot to improve his quality of life, and lessen his responsibility's so he has time to relax. we are both very happy with each other, otherwise no need to marry.
  11. my father is muslims he raised his family (myself and my brothers and sisters) in Canada, We weren't allowed to do what the other children did, such as being out when its dark or speak to boys, etc. considering my mother is Catholic, we all were raised properly and don't drink, did not have sex before marriage (can't speak for my brother on this) no drugs or boyfriends, etc. My parents did in my opinion an excellent job. some aspects of this western society are very tempting but if children love and respect their parents listen to them there will be NO ISSUE. I have been to islamic countries and lived for many years and have seen national islamically raised people do more sin and bad things than Western people. They are just sneaky about it and lie very well.
  12. We are all surrounded by sin every day, it doesn't matter if it is apparent or not. You can raise a good wholesome muslim family in a non Islamic country. and your reward will be much greater because you have been in such an open environment.
  13. @starlight is simply having a narrow mind and won't accept logic and reason. She believes that without Hijab woman are not muslim and Allah Commands and orders us to follow everything like blind sheep. Starlight one finger is not like the rest, sa7? so instead of arguing and dividing Muslims over the sake of a piece of cloth why don't we just all support all Muslims and agree to disagree. Read a little more Quran sister and try actually practicing the teaching and words, instead of judging others. 003:103 "And hold firmly, all together, by the rope which God (stretches out for you), and be not divided among yourselves; and remember with gratitude God's favour on you; for you were enemies and He joined your hearts in love, so that by His Grace, you became brothers; and you were on the brink of the pit of Fire, and He saved you from it. Thus does God make His verses clear to you so that you may be guided" All of the verses which say that a human being is responsible for his or her deeds: کل نفس بما کسبت رهینه المدثر 74/38 “Every soul will be (held) in pledge for its deeds.” (74:38) کل امری بما کسب رهین الطور 52/21 “(Yet) in each individual in pledge for his deeds.” (52:21) e. Verses like, انا هدیناه السبیل اما شاکرا و اما کفورا الانسان 76/3 “We showed him the Way: whether he be grateful or ungrateful (rests on his will).” (76:3) و ما تشاؤن الا ان یشاء الله الانسان 76/30 “But you will not except as God Wills...” (76:30) Therefore we HAVE FREEWILL! Only Humans and Jinns were given this freewill. Accept it and move on.
  14. i am speaking about Qatif, which is Shia area. Also i don't believe my two children from my previous marriage should be an issue since both he and his family accept and respect them.
  15. Oh not you i just was speaking in general, i liked the point about the nuns so i think i trailed onto the catholic and jewish rant starting from your nun point. Hehe sorry for the misunderstanding.
  16. Would you say its better to dress modestly without hijab or wear hijab improperly. You see a lot of people cast judgement on non Hijab wearers, why don't you all look first at the girls who do wear hijab but do it all the wrong ways, tights transparent clothing, short sleeves etc. And do you know why they do this? because they want to appear like a straight muslim and a good girl because this is what their family has taught them is the correct way to get a husband. Because yes for most their goal is to get a husband and a big wedding to show off to all her friends. Its all a big farce.
  17. TBH all this is very true, I lived many many years in two Islamic countries and children and young adults act religious infront of their parents and still leave the house to meet girl/boyfriends and they text and snap them, among drinking, removing hijab and yes even sex, especially anal sex i have noticed to be a BIG thing. Private parties with cross dressers, [Edited Out]es, and liquor. It does happen I know for a fact from a group of very reliable sources.
  18. If you are good parents and teach your children proper values than there is no issue raising your children here while instilling the values and practices of Islam.
  19. Hahah So essentially NO ONE has any idea on Nikah conditions or contracts?
  20. Can someone please tell me why you are all hating on Catholics and Jews? we all follow the same God and same general principals of religion with obvious differences. They are believers. And i honestly think that yes if any western country made it LAW to ban Hijab or head coverings the Islamic world would freak out. There was a case in Quebec, Canada; where a muslim mother tried to force the school system to offer ONLY Halal food at the cafeteria in all Montreal Schools. Canadians so nice, They denied her demand (and yes she was quite aggressive about it) based on the fast that this is not an Islamic country and if they chose to live here in Canada we will not change our laws and traditions to fit everyones needs and wants. However they did decide to start offering Halal options. So you see there is always a middle ground and compromises can be made. Even when regarding the hijab situation in Iran. Just please stop casting judgement and hate towards Catholics and Jews, there are a lot of very good white hearted people.
  21. I have actually gone to speak with a scholar on this subject: not regarding hijab, more so the Wajib and if one doesn't do Wajib things if they are still a muslim or does it automatically make them not muslim. He told me exactly what i had originally been trying to say, and i hope you to will accept this. Wajib things are supposed to be done, yes we can all agree, however if they are not done for whatever reason the person is still a muslim. You also can't chose what to follow and what not to follow in islam, but Allah gave us the ability to decide for ourselves, but we must accept the punishment or rewards for our actions. Allah is the only one who can judge us upon our actions and we can argue these facts forever but it won't make any difference because we are NOT supposed to cast judgement on others only Allah can and he will. Therefore even though Hijab is something i am supposed to do as a muslimah my closing not to does not make me a non believer it simply means im not there yet. and I only answer to Allah. Women who don't cover also go to junnah just live the rest of the believers however as i stated previously the scholar did say there would be a punishment. Imam Ali Quote i got it from English translation: In his Khutbah recorded in Nahj-Al Balaghah # 216, Ali RA Said: فلا تكفوا عن مقالة بحق ، أو بعدل مشورة ، فإني لست في نفسي بفوق أن أخطىء ، ولا آمن ذلك من فعلي “Do not evade me as the people of passion are (to be) evaded, do not meet me with flattery and do not think that I shall take it ill if a true thing is said to me, because the person who feels disgusted when truth is said to him or a just matter is placed before him would find it more difficult to act upon them. Don’t stop saying the Truth, or Just Advice, As I am not above making Mistakes, and I am not safe from making Mistakes in my Actions”. So as i said we can make mistakes therefore we have a choice and freewill as gifted by Allah.
  22. If my individual choices are meaning less than how exactly do our Deeds get created? is it not our choices to do good or bad that make up these deeds? Consider: "Every mistake becomes a lesson" Imam Ali (AS) We are able to make mistakes, we therefore are able to make choice adding up the that mistake. Allah did not create perfect or mindless drones. Regardless of yours or my opinion it is already written each and every individual on this earth has predetermined fates.
  23. In the end, no one holds a gun to my head telling me i must do something. it is infact a choice, regardless of it is it "Wajib". I live in a free country where i have rights and my own entitlement to what i decide to put on my body. To be clear on my feelings, my fiancé does not care weather i wear hijab or not. and if he doesn't than i honestly don't think it is anyone else concern what i do with my body. Also Allah gave us free will. i will not blindly follow without question like Sunni muslims follow what their scholars say. Allah gave us the right to research and discover. I have my own right to fully understand what i am doing and why before i make such a decision than to change how i have been dressing my entire life because other people feel it is mandatory. I want to educate myself first, i want to fully understand the reasoning and meaning behind it. and than and only than will i put a hijab on my head and walk freely, happily and proud in my day to day life. My family and my future husband Completely respects and admires me for this. I would not do anything i am not comfortable with and fully believe in the principals behind it, not for my Husband and not for what you believe our creator insists upon. Knowledge is truth. Also regarding the "when Allah tells us to do something WE DO IT" in a prefect world yes! i completely agree. however this isn't a prefect world. Our lives come down to our own individual choices.
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