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In the Name of God بسم الله


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Everything posted by 3wliya_maryam

  1. Salam, @Zellali I'm sorry this has happened to you. Life sucks but it is what it is, as one of the posts mentioned you can't have everything you want in life and you gotta do it the hard way by accepting it. Life is never fair unless we work tremendously To this day I don't understand the whole marrying a Syed. In fact I've heard a lot of girls nowadays who refuse to marry them because majority of them are close minded and abusive. It all comes down to reputation honestly. If you're ready to do whatever it takes to fight till the ends of the earth to be with him and go through that pain, and if you're very certain that he would become a Shia then go for it. But if its the opposite, then I suggest you stay back.
  2. Salam alaikum, i dont understand how this can be reliable, if the Prophet (sawas) encouraged Islam without force or physical abuse.
  3. salam, i dont know how a turba can be enough to use for tayammum. unless your crush it in pieces but that would b wrong imo
  4. Salam alaikum, Some of youse may have already read this and some of youse may have not (including myself although I have just read it today). https://www.al-islam.org/ghurar-al-hikam-wa-durar-al-kalim-exalted-aphorisms-and-pearls-speech/believer These are the guidelines of Ameer al Mo'mineen (عليه السلام) when it comes to a believer. Unfortunately after reading this, it made me realise that the vast majority of Muslims (mainly Shia Muslims, and in this case including myself), are not true believers, therefore only Muslim by name. Even when they say they believe in Allah and the Ahlulbayt (عليه السلام), there are alot of things they do which go out of the fold in Islam. It made me realise how blind and ignorant many of us can be, that instead of showing a good example towards others as followers of the Ahlulbayt, we choose to pick and judge others We choose to be arrogant and prideful about our beliefs. There are so many Muslims like this sadly. They act like they're next level with their deen and everything but reality is they do it with arrogance. Behind closed doors you don't know what they're like, they just do it to impress others and put up a good image. You end up finding non hijabis who have better intentions than someone who is a hijabi for example. I know some may disagree with me on this but that's literally the truth. Imam Ali (عليه السلام) tells us that a true believer is more humbler than a slave. Instead of looking at our own faults and admitting them we look at others faults as a way of survival. Oh why is she wearing makeup? Why is his hair styled in a certain way? Why does he/she wear super tight clothes? Why isn't she wearing her hijab properly? And then we take a negative perception of those people. We're only judging them based on their appearance when really we have committed alot of our own sins, but obviously its internal and no one can see that. So why should we judge others just based on physical appearance? Many Arabs have a verryy long history of arrogance and hypocrisy. Even until today they remain arrogant. Absolutely sickening. And I know this because I've experienced it both within my household and my community (which is Iraqi). What's more scary is that if the Qaim (عليه السلام) comes out, very few Shias will believe in him. In fact just like how there were a NUMBER OF SHIAS during the Imamat of Imam Jawad (عليه السلام) and Imam Al Naqi (عليه السلام) disbelieved in them because they claimed the imamah at a very young age, and refuted every scholar during their time. If we were Shias during their time, we would we really believe in them? Some of us may say ,YES OF COURSE WE WOULD, but the truth is we wouldn't. I just pray that the majority of Shias will be guided. Also I wanted to give credit to @starlight's post a while ago about the difference between fiqh and akhlaq. I believe I don't remember commenting on it so honestly mad respect towards you for making that thread. People really need to understand this.
  5. its better not to pray behind them imo. if u have the choice to pray on your own than why not
  6. 3aalam al dhar. i wanna know why i chose to come to this corrupt world.
  7. Salam alaikum, Inshallah everyone here is in the best of health in 2021. I would like to bring forth a topic about defining real success. I was hoping if anyone here can share some thoughts. What do you believe is high success? Does it have to do with pursuing medicine, law or engineering? Or is it something deeper, like purifying the soul, gaining spirituality with Allah, strengthening your personality and/or contributing towards your community? Unfortunately some ethnic families claim to have faith in God yet they hold beliefs that nothing is more successful than becoming a doctor, or studying business is not as good. They forget that this is no more than materialistic, which means that even though they may want best for their child, they still want to impress the community they live in. If someone asked you how would you define success, what would be the answer?
  8. They can, but unfortunately in several communities when it comes to girls, they cannot, and is deemed as shameful. They forget that Khadijah(عليه السلام) herself proposed to the Holy Prophet (sawas), but if a woman were to do that in this day and age then it would be unacceptable. In fact Islam does not prohibit a Muslim, male or female to find their partners but there are certain limits and boundaries (which includes not being alone together). Love at first sight. I don't know, sometimes even non Muslims marry after talking for a few months. It just depends on the two and how they work it out for themselves.
  9. We’re back to these mut3ah threads again
  10. Educate yourself more on the matter, your fear will most likely decrease. I'm saying this is because if you are a good Muslim and have been trying your very best, and say you died and went to barzakh, you can redeem the sins you have. there are narrations which state a deceased person (like a family member or relative) may come to you in a dream asking for help if they are in distress or in a dark place. For example if you had prayers you needed to make up for, or other sins that you have not repented for or redeemed there is a chance to do so in barzakh. I don't know about it fully but it is really interesting to research about. May Allah grant us all jannah al firdous
  11. Salam, Music is everywhere. Might as well not go to the shop, or a public place where music is most likely played there. Or a tv show where the music is most likely played in the background. It’s not something we can control. As long as you’re not the one playing or dancing to it, then you should be good. also this isn’t an excuse to listen to music. Obviously if we’re at home and choose to put on music than that’s wrong. I’m talking about situations in which we can’t control. With that being said, go enjoy and meet your family members, congratulate your cousin.
  12. This is extremely true, I've witnessed this a number of times and its absolutely degrading. Obviously not every boy is like that but it all comes down to the parents' upbringing. To not sound like im generalising, the same applies to girls but it is clear enough that it is mostly guys who are given the freedom cause after all, they're guys. Still I'm generalising in a way but they're not opinions, I'm merely stating the facts. My opinion however is that since girls are often sheltered and protected, guys get into more trouble and therefore there the ones that should be more guarded. I'm going through something similar, but not in terms of asking, i just genuinely believe there is hardly any good men based off on my experiences. If he has had some sort of past, make sure he's fully honest to you, this builds a sense of trust otherwise if hes gonna keep hiding things from you, i dont know i wouldn't buy it. My advice is take your time with marriage. It's all naseeb and don't rush into it. Inshallah all the best fee amanillah
  13. Salam 3alaikum, بسم الله الرحمان الرحيم اللهم صلى على محمد و ال محمد I’ll just make this brief; but I’m looking for narrations or sayings in Islam that talk about refusing an invite to a majlis a family is hosting of an imam (عليه السلام) or deceased member in the family without a valid excuse. I’ve been close friends with a sister of mine for a long time however I was not allowed to attend a single majlis of hers at her house and I feel bad for doing so. I was really hoping if there were any verses or narrations that I may use just to show that this may be wrong to refuse an invite to a majlis in which a Shia Muslim is hosting in honour of ahlulbayt (عليه السلام). Fee amanillah
  14. A marriage always has to have balance, regardless. So yes, a man CAN cook, but again there needs to be 50/50. If he's at work, keeping a roof over the family's head, paying loans and debts, then the wife would take the responsibility of the house and vice versa. In fact, it is actually recommended for males to help with the affairs of the house; Imam Ali (عليه السلام) used to help Sayeda Fatima (عليه السلام) manage house duties. it is recommended if he does Imam Ali ((عليه السلام).) often helped Fatimah (s.a.) in the house affairs. He said, “Once, the messenger of Allah (S) visited us while Fatimah was near the cooking pot and I was picking out lentils. He said, ‘O Abul Hasan, listen to what I say, and I do not say except from my Lord. Every man, who helps his wife in her house, Allah will write for him as much as the hairs on his body (the reward of) worship of a year; fasting in the day and worshipping all the night, and Allah will give him like the reward of the patient and the righteous
  15. This narration is narrated by Abu Hurayra, I highly doubt that it is even authentic. A woman is not a toy for God's sake. The narration also does sound to make it seem like women are inferior. Your wives are as a tilth unto you; so approach your tilth when or how ye will; but do some good act for your souls beforehand; and fear Allah. And know that ye are to meet Him (in the Hereafter), and give (these) good tidings to those who believe. (2:223) there are still limits as to when and how a man does intercourse with his wife.
  16. As guest Mohammad has mentioned before, he still needs a wife's permission if she's from ahlulkitab, according to Sayyed Sistani. The OP hasn't mentioned the nature of the women, but this doesn't justify anything the dad has done. Going after several women without your wife's knowledge is simply immoral and displays a lack of trust. Doing anything behind her back already shows mistrust in the relationship. There's a difference between informing your wife about something and receiving permission from her. Either way, the wife's/husband's feelings must always be validated regardless of the situation. Till this day even I don't understand why this is permissible in Islam.
  17. You're lucky tbh now that technology is constantly evolving you can purchase a female robot who won't talk unless needed to. Don't ever be a father. Go marry a doll. You are sexist.
  18. Parents will never admit that they're wrong. Its a common thing, and I believe parents should normalise their children correcting them whenever they're wrong, as no one, not even parents are considered perfect. Yet they act like they are always right regardless, they forget the fact that living in this generation where technology is available to us, we acquire extra knowledge. They may already know half of what Islam has allowed, but they still choose to deny it due to pressing cultural beliefs. As with your case, honestly just save your deen and move out without even questioning them. At the end of the day, if you can't please your parents because they're just careless, your intentions are to please Allah.
  19. Thankyou, I was just about to say that. Alot of men think that marriage will help, but pornography/masturbation is an addiction and like any addiction it takes time for it to go away. No one is perfect, but its on you to take full control.
  20. If there is one thing I've learnt last year during the pandemic, is that you gotta do what you gotta do. You have to nag and beg and go through the worse crap in order to achieve what you want. Its the only way. I still haven't experienced the stage of getting married yet, but throughout time know that cultural beliefs are often evolving. But sister please try and find out more information about him and whether he has a massive ego, most Arab men you find are like that. I know I sound like I'm generalising because a lot of ethnic communities tend to have prideful men, but just be careful.
  21. I was talking about the sane people. insane people can do any thing they want No one is sane when they physically hurt their partner. You’re just making excuses.
  22. From experience I don’t disagree with this one. Not all but majority of them just have this massive ego filled with selfishness.
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