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candlesandpizza

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    muslim

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    Female

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  1. candlesandpizza

    Hijab

    Wa Alakum al salam sister, 6 months has passed and my hijab is still intact alhamdillah. I decided to move and work in a different country for a bit, this changed my mindset dramatically but I am still tired, and get overwhelmed. I can say that I am feeling much more like myself today than 6 months ago. I am more conscious and cognizant of Allah swt which has helped me reestablish my purpose. I still have down days but alhamdillah I am okay. thank you sister.
  2. candlesandpizza

    feeling down

    Salam, Honestly I know there is a lot of stigma with depression, but I am not depressed. I have anxiety in particular moments in my life, but other than that I feel like I am very reflective with how I feel and truly love life. InshaAllah I will be following through with all your advice and try to see whats going on because I know whatever Im feeling isnt what I want I should be feeling and something is definitely off. thank you all
  3. candlesandpizza

    feeling down

    I feel like crap, cant focus for the life of me, overeating and gaining weight. I gained about 20 pounds in 2017 and ive always been a little overweight but now I feel like I cant bounce back. I also have been feeling very hopeless and tired, and going through a lot of stress. I literally feel like my worse self and Im very ungrateful and tend to take the victim role but then get angry at victimizing myself. im always trying those 1200 calories daily diet things but get so hungry that im literally binging by the end of day. i have no will power, and thats the honest truth. i feel like i should just be okay with my weight but you know how it goes, self love, self hate...vicious cycle plus family pressure which makes me confused. oh and by the way, I cant speak to my mom about it because she offers no emotional guidance and makes me even more uncertain about myself. I have confidence and trust in myself to complete professional task that are outside of my personal life but cant seem to take care of my health and personal goals. i hate meal planning, i hate the gym and the smell of sweat and I just want to chillax and wake up thinner with more energy. Im gonna see a doctor, does anyone recommend a particular specialty?
  4. candlesandpizza

    Hijab

    No it won't go away but I'd feel less scrutinized. As a women who wears the hijab in the west, I always feel like I have to present myself as open and willing to converse so that I don't leave the impression that I am mean or quiet. It's exhausting and makes the hijab unappealing to me.
  5. candlesandpizza

    Hijab

    I'm overworked, tired and don't recognize myself anymore. I was diagnosed with chronic ebv which makes me feel very fatigued. Im the responsible one in my family and usually "fixes" everyone else's problems . Unfortunately with the stress that comes from my responsibilities and illness I cant help but fall into the stereotypical "timid" Muslim women category. I hate feeling small but I'm physically sick and can't exert too much energy to fight back and prove that I'm confident, smart, etc... So the hijab that I once loved and understood became the personal symbol of my illness and self doubt. I hate how I look, I hate how I'm the only hijabi at work or school and I hate that fact that I'm so unhappy. Before I fell sick, every hour of my day was invested in something bigger than me. I feel like I lost so much of myself and don't even know what to do. If I remove my hijab maybe I wouldn't stick out like a sore thumb as the quiet looking Muslim girl who always seems tired. I don't enjoy making new friends because I dread having a conversation about isis, gas prices or trump. I feel like I'm more than just my hijab, and it's so hard to just be myself. I spoke to my mom about this and she freaked out. She wasn't having any of it and was angry at me for even talking about it. She thinks that if I remove my hijab my brothers would become less religious because I'm suppose to be the responsible/religious one. Allah swt has given me so much but I still can't take control of my insecurities. maybe if I remove my hijab I'll be more aware of myself and become a better Muslim in the long run. Eid Mubarak everyone and sorry for rambling!
  6. Any books anyone would recommend on how to budget money the Islamic way? I want to be very organized with how I deal with money and what I spend it on as well but I have many questions. I went to university in the west and now that I've graduated I have loans that have piled interest. I also want to put a percentage aside of my paycheck to zakat and khums but is there a specific number that is recommended? Also, hypothetically speaking if in the future I had additional money what would be the Islamic perspective on purchasing luxury items?
  7. candlesandpizza

    Gym and music

    I go to the gym because I am trying to better my mental and physical health but I noticed I can not work out without listening to music. When I'm done working out, instead of feeling rejoiced I feel guilty. What is recommended? I am not fluent in Arabic so I really don't understand nashids. Is it better if I just listen to beats with no lyrics?
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