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In the Name of God بسم الله

ali_fatheroforphans

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Everything posted by ali_fatheroforphans

  1. Alhumdulillah brother just been very busy with life. Hope you've been well too inshallah! Alhumdulillah, likewise hope you've been doing well
  2. Salam brother, This does happen be it a woman or a man. I think there are many reasons why this can happen. The root of all this does go back to not being rooted in tawhid. Once we stray away from our fitrah and don't understand who we are we will start acting unnatural and unfaithful. When someone is obedient and submissive to Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) then that translates to all other aspects naturally. Aside from the fundamental which I just mentioned above, I also feel that when we marry the wrong spouse who we have no emotional, spiritual and physical connection to then these problems arise. That's why it's important to marry the right person so we are fully committed to them and can be faithful to them. Even with the right person it does require a lot of work - refining of the soul and constantly growing in nearness to Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى). But the root of all problems is straying away from tawhid. Someone who truly believes in God and has that deep connection would never engage in unfaithful behaviour.
  3. Salam Shiachat Fam, Inshallah everyone has been doing well, been a while.
  4. Yeah I personally didn't see anything positive come out of this situation for the Muslims.
  5. @AbdusSibtayn I've been finding this book very good. Actually brother @Ibn Al-Ja'abi who's all over Arabic mashallah has also recommended this. https://www.amazon.com.au/Introduction-Koranic-Classical-Arabic/dp/0936347406 You can find both free pdf and solutions key online.
  6. Salam Alaykum, You have to understand how the hawza system works. Some people decide to pursue their hawza studies to become jurists. The hawza system is actually designed to cater for those people. However not everyone decides to pursue that path. Some people may do hawza to become experts at other fields such as philosophy, theology, history etc. It's not common to find a marja (those who people do we do taqleed to) to be an expert at a lot of other fields as well. They are specialists when it comes to their chosen field. This is why they may have not written books in other fields. The books you've mentioned relate to jurisprudence, which is expected since that relates to his speciality. I don't expect him to publish books on other subjects such as mysticism ('irfan) etc. If it goes beyond his area. So when people deem him to be a great scholar, what sort of criteria are you looking for to be able to validate or invalidate their conclusions? Are you basing it on the number of books written? How many followers? Presence? Or in a more technical sense of their chosen area of expertise? I would say the best people to ask would be those who have completed or are studying their advanced Kharij studies in hawza. How can a layman evaluate the expertise of these maraja if they have not even acquainted themselves with the science to an advanced level? It's like a high school student evaluating the works of a PHD student. Again, it's not a requirement nor necessary for a scholar to give public lectures. I know many scholars who prefer not to out of precaution and they prefer addressing issues in different ways to avoid misunderstandings. Some may not have the time simply due to such a demanding role where millions depend on their fatawa around the world. Do you realise how much pressure one is faced with for such a big task? Also not to disregard their personal spiritual responsibilities and their families.
  7. As brother @Ibn-e-Muhammad said correctly that when chest beating first started appearing in processions and public protests - the idea behind it wasn't the same as what we see today. It is definitely more organised today as opposed to people spontaneously hitting their chest which doesn't necessarily require listening to a latmiya. It's one thing hiring a big studio, investing millions in producing nohay (latmiyas), having large rows etc. Where everything is properly planned. It's a completely different thing when people naturally out of grief start beating their chests.
  8. In Islam a person's superiority in eyes of God is based on how obedient they are to God. Our intention, actions and beliefs is what matters. It really doesn't matter whether a person feels superior, how we are in the books of God should be our concern. I don't think we're sent to this world to take unnecessary pride in these things.
  9. Salam Alaykum Sister, Just read your story and really appreciate you for sharing your authentic reflections. I just wanted to make a couple of points: (1) Be cautious about your own spirituality and I understand it's tough. But please don't let this become a negative experience for you. Feelings of resentment, frustration and anger are not linked with true faith. Sometimes this can lead people to adopt a completely flawed understanding of Islam which is not based on rational principles. This is why some people can be overly attracted to aggressive Islamic discourse which aims to castigate others and where blanket statements are made. This will only harm you in the long-term. This 'me' vs 'the world' attitude can kick in and its harmful. I know it's tough and may Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) make it easy for you but you have to really manage and navigate your emotions properly. Again surround yourself with others and don't let too much resentment build. (2) Remember that not everyone wants to go deep into religion. Only those who have reached that level and have experienced contentment and satisfaction from faith, will appreciate your journey. That's why it's worth surrounding yourself with those people. (3) Remember that everyone operates within a set of assumptions about the world. Our actions are only a manifestation of our internal worldview and beliefs. What we say or do will always link back to our worldview. I really don't blame your family, it's just that in the contemporary context, God has been detached from the equation. If someone doesn't place God on the top, then we will replace it with ourselves and our ego. Everything then is about fulfilling our materialistic needs. Just understand where they're coming from, this will prove to be very important. You have to go to the root. (4) From an ethical and Irfani side of things, it can be problematic focusing on others rather than our own journey. We don't know our end and matters of the heart are best left to Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى). Don't ever look down on anyone. If you have faith then thank Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) for it and wish the same for your family. These are just some points to ponder over. May Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) make it easy for you. Don't stress too much, you'll be fine.
  10. Salam Alaykum brother, It is not correct that we can ever get to know a person fully until we actually get married and start physically living with them. Life before marriage and after marriage will be different. You'll also find out a lot about a person when you see how they react during hardships. The point I'm making is that we can't ever be fully certain. There will be some surprises and you need to be mature and smart to deal with them. Sometimes you'll end up liking a person more after marriage when you trust the process and let true love grow. Love is not something that is found, it grows with time. I don't have any advice I believe you are the best one to judge the situation and trust your intellect. I would say that however if you don't find any serious red flags that might overly compromise your faith then put your trust in Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى). Also dig into why you have that uncertainty? Could it just be a normal feeling that everyone has? Just make sure that whatever decision you make, it's not when you're in a bad mood or an overly good mood. Be balanced and be smart about this. Also it's good to head into marriage with a positive mindset. You should have this desire to be a good person and treat your spouse with dignity and respect.
  11. Best to have contacts of some local or overseas scholars who have a strong grasp of jurisprudence. Preferably those who have finished their advanced kharij studies in usul/fiqh. I've given up on relying on direct fatwa from the office of the maraja cos takes a month for them to reply. I prefer messaging a scholar directly.
  12. Yes exactly and I've also met some who aren't marjas but do exhibit those traits. Some top scholars tend to be a bit lowkey and they actually don't self-promote themselves. But they have truly transformed the lives of their students and helped them immensely. It gets to the point that their students translate their works and share their pearls of wisdom with others. I've also noticed that they don't limit the learning experience of the laity or students of knowledge to themselves. This is one trait which stands out to me a lot. May Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) expose us to the true scholars.
  13. Salam Alaykum, I came across some very interesting reflections by a Sunni Scholar on the characteristics of true scholars and how we can know who to learn from: 1. Other scholars who have finished complete curricula from *other* Islamic seminaries, universities, and with *other* teachers, learn from this person and see this person as *their* teacher. 2. This person’s students have healthy family lives, good careers, and are generally well-placed in life relative to the environment/community they are in. One would not think that they have given up on fulfilling any of their worldly responsibilities in order to learn from the ‘alim. The student body includes those who are well-educated in other fields, indicating that what is being provided truly has the intellectual and academic capacity to benefit everyone. 3. This person maintains an absolutely uncompromising ethic on gender interactions and etiquette between students and teachers. There are no secrets, no “closed-doors”, no private matters that anyone is asked to keep for them. 4. This person’s teachers and peers agree on their ability to understand, teach, and lead. They also endorse their character. 5. This person’s institutional and community work revolves around *other* people being trained and equipped to carry the work after him. They are not clamoring to be the star of the show themselves but seek to empower other ‘ulama and students. 6. This person’s adab and manners in public are impeccable. They are not emotionally driven to outbursts due to current events and do not create public spectacles of conflict and virtue-signaling to demonstrate that he has taken the “correct” position. 7. Their reformative efforts are done to change, not to show. Reformative advice is given to people and in a way that can actually change them, rather than shame them. 8. Their critiques of those who they disagree with are about the issues and arguments. They are not personal or biting in nature. 9. Their behavior in private or one-on-one may be more frank or direct, but they do not cross the line of decency and decorum that they present in public. More or less, they are the same person. 10. They do not self-promote or discuss their own achievements. They do the work, and qualified, capable, educated students find so much value in their work that THEY do the promotion to push the work forward. 11. Their opinions are firm on the Shari’ah and they are consistent in their methodology – but they are understanding and adaptive to the social-emotional needs of others. 12. They are not insular when it comes to the non-Muslim society and community. They openly engage and can address other communities with manners and intellect. 13. They do not advocate cultural retreat but advocate benefiting society as a whole through honest service, exchange, and engagement. 14. Their knowledge is not limited to the Islamic sciences, but they are well-read on the intellectual foundations of other worldviews, civilizational systems, and the modern world. 15. Their scope of discourse is comprehensive. They have the ability to bring the Quran, the Sunnah, and the scholarly tradition to bear on the context at hand without being obsessed with a singular issue. Instead, they are able to transmit the legacy of the Prophet (s) in a comprehensive manner that addresses the full-scope of Islamic discourse. They exist and they are out there. Seek them out and benefit from them as much as you can.
  14. This world is nothing but a playground. It's just a temporary place. Why would anyone be sad for it to end. We were never meant for this world.
  15. I'm studying it through the ehawza institution which focuses on classical Arabic - very geared towards Quran and Hadith literature. But also have a tutor on the side who is teaching me Modern Standard Arabic and I'm working through a book. There are slight differences but learning MSA and classical Arabic go hand in hand. It'll also give you a great mix of vocab. Anyway I don't think it's easy doing it by yourself at all - you defs need someone to hold your hand in this journey if you decide to do it. Or at least an institution where you're provided with a step by step process to follow.
  16. Salam Alaykum, A major goal of mine which I'm working towards is to learn and inshallah master classical Arabic - which will take another 3-5 years. I've made some progress but long way to go. So this Ramadan I plan to engage in daily Quran reading and add a couple of new words to my vocabulary. I plan to learn like 10 new words per day - that's like 300 words for the entire month. Inshllah this will happen. I also plan to finish 2 books that I have in mind inshallah.
  17. There will always be disagreements if your presuppositions don't match.
  18. Salam Brother, Sorry to hear about that, may Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) give you sabr. In short this is a very lengthy discussion which can't be solved in one post. I know a great brother who studies at hawza Qom, he's written this article which will give you a lot of preliminary knowledge to be able to understand some aspects of this discussion. https://mindinmomentum.com/?p=378
  19. @AbdusSibtayn You raised some very valid points. I also don't think hadiths themselves are always the cause of people leaving Islam. I think maybe its because we've become so rooted in foreign frameworks that we start to assess our own hadith litreature through their lens. Rather then assessing what happened in history and evaluating our sources based on our own methdologies, we employ foreign ones. I agree I do think it seems wrong to jump to conclusions and say "the Imam could never have done or said that". Even scholars are prone to this mistake.
  20. Most these types of people seem to have highly dogmatic beliefs and might not even have properly understood Islam. I would even question whether they uphold a true Islamic identity. If you do decide to study Islam you will slowly start to create a separation between 'Islam' and 'Muslims'. If you then see a display of 'low' and questionable behaviour you'll just totally be indifferent because you know that Islam is not defined by people. Islam can stand on its own and should also be evaluated based on its merits, teachings etc. Not based on fallible people who are prone to biases, errors, poor understanding, ego etc. I do understand your frustration though especially if it comes from those who claim to be 'scholars' etc.
  21. I would maybe study Islam?
  22. It's good in some ways and depends on the individual and what sort of style of learning they prefer. It does seem modern in terms of high quality recorded lessons etc. They also have tutoring options where you can privately get tutored by a hawza teacher. Tbh the hawza hasn't personally caught my interest. But it may work for someone else. They have a very traditional book styled approach. I have to admit tho ehawza is slightly old and a lot of the initial courses were recorded many years ago and are only in audio and accompanied by slides (except the later ones and the Arabic units). But I think that's not a concern for me and I've actually been drawn to it a lot. I feel the exposure to the practical side of irfan and theoretical mysticism is something that you don't find in many online hawzas. Plus Sheikh Mansour is at a level to be teaching irfan - with these units you can't just get anyone and expect him to be teaching as It depends a lot on the teachers spirituality etc. He is a very good scholar alhumdulillah and I've actually found these lectures extremely beneficial. The way Arabic is taught at ehawza (based on where I'm at atm) is very engaging. In some hawzas you'd literally want to sleep during an Arabic lesson. So lots of positives and grateful for this journey. But online hawza itself is not the solution. Learning on the side, meeting with fellow students have creating discussion circles, extensively researching on the side - all these things are essential if someone wants to be a good student.
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