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In the Name of God بسم الله

ali_fatheroforphans

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Everything posted by ali_fatheroforphans

  1. This world is nothing but a playground. It's just a temporary place. Why would anyone be sad for it to end. We were never meant for this world.
  2. I'm studying it through the ehawza institution which focuses on classical Arabic - very geared towards Quran and Hadith literature. But also have a tutor on the side who is teaching me Modern Standard Arabic and I'm working through a book. There are slight differences but learning MSA and classical Arabic go hand in hand. It'll also give you a great mix of vocab. Anyway I don't think it's easy doing it by yourself at all - you defs need someone to hold your hand in this journey if you decide to do it. Or at least an institution where you're provided with a step by step process to follow.
  3. Salam Alaykum, A major goal of mine which I'm working towards is to learn and inshallah master classical Arabic - which will take another 3-5 years. I've made some progress but long way to go. So this Ramadan I plan to engage in daily Quran reading and add a couple of new words to my vocabulary. I plan to learn like 10 new words per day - that's like 300 words for the entire month. Inshllah this will happen. I also plan to finish 2 books that I have in mind inshallah.
  4. There will always be disagreements if your presuppositions don't match.
  5. Salam Brother, Sorry to hear about that, may Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) give you sabr. In short this is a very lengthy discussion which can't be solved in one post. I know a great brother who studies at hawza Qom, he's written this article which will give you a lot of preliminary knowledge to be able to understand some aspects of this discussion. https://mindinmomentum.com/?p=378
  6. Most these types of people seem to have highly dogmatic beliefs and might not even have properly understood Islam. I would even question whether they uphold a true Islamic identity. If you do decide to study Islam you will slowly start to create a separation between 'Islam' and 'Muslims'. If you then see a display of 'low' and questionable behaviour you'll just totally be indifferent because you know that Islam is not defined by people. Islam can stand on its own and should also be evaluated based on its merits, teachings etc. Not based on fallible people who are prone to biases, errors, poor understanding, ego etc. I do understand your frustration though especially if it comes from those who claim to be 'scholars' etc.
  7. I would maybe study Islam?
  8. It's good in some ways and depends on the individual and what sort of style of learning they prefer. It does seem modern in terms of high quality recorded lessons etc. They also have tutoring options where you can privately get tutored by a hawza teacher. Tbh the hawza hasn't personally caught my interest. But it may work for someone else. They have a very traditional book styled approach. I have to admit tho ehawza is slightly old and a lot of the initial courses were recorded many years ago and are only in audio and accompanied by slides (except the later ones and the Arabic units). But I think that's not a concern for me and I've actually been drawn to it a lot. I feel the exposure to the practical side of irfan and theoretical mysticism is something that you don't find in many online hawzas. Plus Sheikh Mansour is at a level to be teaching irfan - with these units you can't just get anyone and expect him to be teaching as It depends a lot on the teachers spirituality etc. He is a very good scholar alhumdulillah and I've actually found these lectures extremely beneficial. The way Arabic is taught at ehawza (based on where I'm at atm) is very engaging. In some hawzas you'd literally want to sleep during an Arabic lesson. So lots of positives and grateful for this journey. But online hawza itself is not the solution. Learning on the side, meeting with fellow students have creating discussion circles, extensively researching on the side - all these things are essential if someone wants to be a good student.
  9. Completely agree. I too am a student of ehawza and the journey has been amazing till now alhumdulillah.
  10. I have consulted a few people who have studied many years at hawza Qom. They say that it's an entire different world with its own challenges. You might also realise that it's not what you may expect. They do point out that it's not as perfect as some people think. There are also many stories I've heard from scholars of people who entered hawza Qom and they were super excited and keen - after a while they dropped out. Definitely learn more about what hawza is all about and have a goal in mind. Do you want to do it for the experience or for actual learning? The online hawza route is a good option I feel based on your situation. Again don't feel like it's inferior to any other hawza. At the end of the day hawza literally teaches students the tools so they can navigate their ways when they get into research. You can even try to get hold of some great teachers and study with them in addition to online hawza. But, don't blindly get into any online institution, do your research. It's important to be exposed to good scholars and teachers who have the right framework. Ehawza seems to be a good one. I feel as Muslims living in the West it's possible to have a secular degree but also be consistently learning Islam on the side in a structured way. This is what will build communities going forward.
  11. Walaikum Salam brother, I've known you in the forum for a while - you're a great brother. Inshallah kheir! You're in my duas.
  12. Salam Alaykum brother, It seems to me you're assuming that your actions are only supposed to follow when you're in the right mental state and everything is going well. This will actually create a lot more stress brother. You're worrying too much about thoughts, emotions etc. The more you worry about it the more it'll grow in intensity. Think and imagine you're next to a river. The river symbolises your thoughts, emotions, desires mood etc. The more you try to fight the stream of flow the more you'll exhaust yourself and create a terrible experience. But imagine you stop fighting against the stream and just let your body float while you stare at the sky. Try to actually visualise this and see what happens. What would you choose to do? This may sound a bit strange lol but this may help you assess your framework and where your thoughts are coming from. Don't worry about why they're present. Don't worry about things that are not in your control. Focus on making choices and living based on your values. Just a question: do you have a job and work?
  13. It depends on what we assume to be the role of scholars in the modern world. I think they should be competent in their field and slowly and systematically be able to build the beliefs of individuals in smart ways. Then individuals can navigate their own way. Being aware of the issues the youth go through can also come through dialogue and discussion. A scholar just needs to be willing to listen and must then have the knowledge and wisdom to tackle these issues appropriately. A scholar doesn't need to sit through and watch an entire movie or engage in something that itself may potentially affect them. Being generally aware is different.
  14. This life is short and limited. It's not our ultimate destination. The only thing that matters is how we are in the books of Allah. Worry about making sure you've sought sincere repentance.
  15. I think it's very concerning when I hear scholars talk about movies and then when I search it up - it has a lot of inappropriate scenes. I miss scholars such as Imam Khomeini and the greats who lived such simple lives. The post-modern era is really making us less concerned with the divine and more trapped in the lowest realm of existence.
  16. Salam, https://m.facebook.com/333160280546/posts/10158513058030547/?d=m
  17. Wasalam brother, This is my personal humble advice and take this with a pinch of salt because I'm just one year older than you and am not experienced or anything. At the end of the day you are your best judge and know all the information. One thing I would say is that whenever you set a standard for your spouse - make sure you meet that standard. That means you should be equally (or better) as good in terms of akhlaq, wajibaat etc. You should also be chaste. These are just some introductory thoughts to help you judge whether your criteria is realistic. If you want to marry a woman who doesn't want kids asap then I would suggest looking into the 18 age range. My reasoning for this is because they have more flexibility in terms of age and normally they'd want to focus on studies at that age. You can also make it an opportunity to focus more on having a good time with her and creating a strong foundation which is very important. Also this is my humble opinion and some may disagree to this. But have a think about it and remember that this may not apply to everyone - these are just general and preliminary thoughts. I think it might be a bit better marrying girls who are younger (I'd say teenage age range) even though they may not meet all your criteria - they are more likely to change at that age given they have the basic framework and do their basic wajibaat. Don't be quick to judge all of them and disregard the options. I do believe there are many good girls raised in the West they just need a man who is knowledgable, humble, pious and non-hypocritical. Having said this, I'm not saying there aren't women in their twenties who will meet your standard. So just keep an open mind. Overall, a good lesson you can take from this is to make sure that your genuinely meet the standard you set for your spouse.
  18. If they are not religious then why are you their friends and even consider them to be your friends?
  19. You need structure in this case. Otherwise it'll be random and overwhelming. Put aside one day a week where you can gather with a few people and remember Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) etc. It could be a dua kumayl program or just getting together for religious reasons. Once the connection is lost we become absent minded and that's when we start committing sins.
  20. I think there needs to be some context and this may help the audience as well as yourself understand the situation a bit better. Some questions to ask yourselves and answer honestly inshallah: (1) Do you visit places of zikr at least once a week? Maybe an Islamic youth program, majlis, mosque etc.? (2) Do you have a circle of religious friends? do you surround yourself with morally upright and faithful people? (3) Do you have some form of connection with an Islamic community/husayniya?
  21. Salam brother, This is good advice but I do think seeing the potential in someone is important too. It's hard to find all the criteria in someone - for example a man looking for a woman can't expect her be wearing the perfect hijab etc. have amazing akhlaq, be like the perfect Muslimah. Especially if the girl Is young we have to see if the basic framework is there and the potential for them to grow. But if you're marrying someone who has already passed their twenties and is a bit old - Yes the possibility for them changing is a bit more slim (although It can happen as Allah can guide anyone). Then we should defs judge them by who they. Also we have to leave it to Allah (سُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى) after doing our homework. It's possible for us to not spot any red flags and then after we find out something about them. I do think that those who have a bad spouse - it's an opportunity for them to elevate themselves spiritually and it's defs a test.
  22. Salam Laith, Inshallah you're doing well. I've not been here for a while too just decided to post since got reminded of the shiachat during the new year. Congrats on getting married inshallah praying that you have a successful marriage. Yes lots of memories I remember chatting with you and the gang ages back. Most of them have disappeared I think.
  23. Salam Alaykum Everyone, Long time! Inshallah you all are well. Happy New Year!
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