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Everything posted by Islandsandmirrors

  1. Lizzie McGuire Even Stevens Phil of the Future Thats so Raven
  2. Okay, you have not lost your iman. You’re just frustrated and angry—this is normal. You have not left the religion.
  3. Yes, I have hollow cheeks and my maxilla was moved up and forwards.
  4. Not all music can be deemed haram. In fact, most Marjas haven’t reached a consensus on music being completely haram. Some Marjas think all music is haram, others think certain music is haram, and really, music is a grey area. Therapists use calming music in the background of visualization techniques used to reduce anxiety. Yoga is often performed with soothing music in the background. Classical music has been shown to help concentration. Music therapy exists. Metal music, satanic music like Marilyn Manson and the like is not therapeutic and likely haram. Your average feel-good pop song about daily struggles is not. In fact, music is a way to make people feel less alone. Music is a way to be creative, to show others that we all go through the same struggles. It’s comforting to know that even celebs are not immune to feelings of depression, to loss, and to share that in song can be very healing when you feel alone.
  5. A year ago, during double jaw surgery, I got my cheeks augmented at the same time, using my hip bone grafts (as opposed to implants or fat grafts) to add structure to the area. This thread is for people who are curious about what goes into getting any cosmetic enhancement done, wether temporary or permanent. Or any questions you may have. For the record, no one can tell I’ve had this done—they just think my features were enhanced by jaw surgery alone. And it’s probably because I got bone grafts, so they don’t look fake or unnatural.
  6. Did you not read the rest of my post? I said manipulative and abusive people are the worst kind of people to be guided. How is this poor judgement?
  7. So many people I feel are undeserving of guidance, (such as manipulative, abusive people, arrogant ones, people who show off, and those who are complete hypocrites, etc.) whereas other people might not know Islam, and yet, their akhlaq, and character, and patience surpasses the people in our community. They don’t lie, they don’t backbite, or try to make other people’s lives hell, don’t hurt people’s feelings, etc. They live life minding their own business. Why is it that these amazing individuals never become Muslims, and other people, even born Muslims, are the worst people, yet they pray, and fast, and do their wajibats? (Basically, they are outwardly Muslim, yet they don’t take the Qur'an’s teachings to heart and their character is lacking.) Why does Allah guide some, and not others? Why does Allah keep certain people guided, and others are allowed to stray?
  8. For those that view men as cowardly or what have you for being affectionate toward one’s WIFE, then maybe you all should consider that not all men are cold and stoic. And it’s not “the act of non-Muslims” to be affectionate in public. This person just wants to an excuse to label something as haram.
  9. You have to slowly increase your weights at the gym. Lift heavy, fewer reps.
  10. The Qur'an makes this clear as well as Hadith. (In the Qur'an, it talks about how 12 Imams were raised at the time of Moses (عليه السلام) ) Forget which surah it was. EDIT: the person above me just posted it.
  11. There were Imams after the time of Moses (عليه السلام).
  12. Maybe an affectionate couple will set a good standard for what people should look for in a partner and not settle for just anyone who seeks marriage. We should all strive to have an ideal marriage with the ideal partner. Not some mediocre marriage, with a lack of affection, communication, respect, with a mediocre guy. Back in the day in the Middle East, people married not because of love or because the two got along well, but because someone fit in someone else’s social economic status, and that it was thought that if they fit together in that respect, then the marriage would be easier. And because everyone had similar problems with their spouses as a result of meeting this way (lack of communication, not choosing someone who would be source of peace and comfort emotionally, mentally.) they just thought it was normal and an inevitable part of marriage to not be totally affectionate with your partner. We know better nowadays. We know what a healthy relationship looks like, what we want, what the signs of an abusive partner are, who we are as people. If people are going to get angry over a bit of handholding, or kisses, then it shows that they have some issues. Maybe they are emotionally unavailable and have their walls up, and are unwilling to commit to love, and as a result, they think everyone should be the same way.
  13. There’s nothing wrong with two people who have made their relationship halal for them to be affectionate wether in person or online. It sets a good example for the kids because they will understand and learn how to treat their spouses. Being uncomfortable with PDA is understandable, but it doesn’t make it wrong. To be honest, I thought PDA was awkward when I was single, but now that I’m married, I don’t find it awkward to be around affectionate couples at all, nor do I feel awkward being affectionate toward my spouse in front of others. It feels very natural.
  14. No, I didn’t attempt to guide them. It was a thread about how the so called caliphs were great, and I replied with “how are they great when they oppressed the Prophet’s family?” And got tons of lols as a result.
  15. I’d love to have a sapphire ring as I love gemstones, and would have gone for a yellow gold band, diamond as the center stone, and either ruby or sapphire stones on the side (similar to Jessica Simpson’s engagement ring.) but I wanted to keep it relatively budget-friendly for my hubby. So I just went for a simple solitaire. Funnily enough, I get tons of compliments on it. My wedding band is diamonds embedded all around. For my one year, I want a sapphire ring.
  16. And again, if he’s acting disinterested now, so early in the relationship, then he’s making it clear that he’s not someone to put effort and communicate effectively in any relationship. Op: run, don’t walk away. This man is only giving you crumbs and expects you to be okay with it. He’s an abusive, controlling person, whom you are constantly fighting with. You, as a sensitive person, need to be with someone who is emotionally in tune with your needs, emotions, and willing to communicate and build trust, and most of all, patient. This guy is not that guy. And that’s okay. You’ll find someone whom you can really get along with, and understands you.
  17. Yeah, I meant diplomas, not that he was uneducated.
  18. Did the Prophet get a formal education (go to a university) like we do today?
  19. To those who say that the Prophet didn’t wear a ring, so I’m not going to wear one, etc. Should also go live in some desert area, only eat dates and bread, not have a TV, not drive, not use the internet, not get a diploma (formal university), use camels as transportation, because the Prophet (عليه السلام) didn’t live with technology.
  20. Nowadays, not wearing a ring in majority of the world will give a false impression that you’re single or that you’re having problems with your spouse for not doing so. That’s my biggest issue. And if people think you’re single, when you’re not, well, I don’t think that’s very respectful. Taking your husband’s last name (which I didn’t do myself) is not always necessary, nor should people choose to wear diamond rings if they don’t want to. Not wearing a ring at all can give off a bad impression. @IbnSina: the Prophet (عليه السلام) didn’t wear suits to work, yet suits nowadays to meetings is a sign of professionalism. Are you not going to wear a suit also just because they didn’t? Come up with a better argument.
  21. How is this Western culture? A lot of things are Western, but regardless, people around the world nowadays wear rings when they get married (it doesn’t have to be a diamond, or even expensive.) — because it’s custom to do so. In fact, anywhere around the world, wether in Iran or in America, people would find it extremely odd if you don’t wear one in today’s time. They might think bad things about you for refusing to wear one, such as not wanting to seem “tied down” or taken. Just because the Prophet (صلى الله عليه وآله وسلم) or the Ahlul Bayt (عليه السلام) didn’t wear rings, it doesn’t make it wrong to do so.
  22. It’s not about the workplace entirely. It’s to also show to the community that you are married. It’s a respectful thing to do for your wife. Wearing a ring wouldn’t harm you.
  23. How are you going to show to others you’re taken/married?
  24. @Abu Nur: Even my Sunni husband criticizes those who are stubborn (to be honest, my husband doesn’t consider himself Sunni anymore.) and that the true believers are always a few.
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