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In the Name of God بسم الله

Lilly14

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  1. Like
    Lilly14 reacted to ali_fatheroforphans in RANT!   
    Have you travelled to every corner of the world? Have you visited Australia? Have you visited Canada? London? New Zealand? Malaysia? Sweden? The list goes on.
    There are over a billion people in this world. What is your definition of "good" to start with? Everyone considers themselves to be good people. It's not right to say that "good men" can't be found. I can name you so many girls who behave like immature snakes. I still wouldn't call them bad or evil people.
    It's just unproductive to say stuff like "all men are trash" etc. "Good men can't be found", "men this men that". Islam categorizes all faithful people together. Good people will be good, regardless of their gender.
     
     
     
  2. Like
    Lilly14 reacted to Moalfas in RANT!   
    Indeed, we can all exercise a certain amount of deception especially before marriage, as we exaggerate the good in us and hide the bad. That's why it's good to have family involved as they can pick up on things without being 'emotionally involved'.
  3. Like
    Lilly14 reacted to hasanhh in RANT!   
    But they will exercise a certain amount of deceptive practice.
  4. Like
    Lilly14 reacted to starlight in RANT!   
    Sister, why don't you involve your brother or father in the initial vetting process? In my experience men act less like jerks when dealing with men. 
  5. Completely Agree
    Lilly14 reacted to arch1027116 in RANT!   
    I am super frustrated right now and I just wanted to let it out. I’ve been on this matrimony app looking for a spouse because where I live it’s difficult to find a Shia through the community.
    I am really annoyed at the way men behave. I mean they’ve got no akhlaq whatsoever. Firstly I hardly see any men who are practicing but even besides that atleast they should have basic ethics. They think it’s okay to chat with a woman for a long time and then all of a sudden when there’s literally a perfect conversation going on just ghost them. Okay if you’ve got some personal issues going on then just apologise for wasting someone else’s time and move on. Then there are those who ghost you after you show them your photo. Again can’t they just tell you in a polite manner and move on? and then the ones who start flirting the moment they start chatting. I feel like men have no emotional intelligence and couldn’t care much about the feelings of anyone. It’s a shame that men who follow the Ahlul Bayt who are the perfect examples of alhlaq have this kind of behaviour. Our generation thinks it’s okay to ignore or be rude to a person over the internet, not realising that it’s a human and not a robot on the other side of the screen.
    I had no exposure to men all my life except my brother and my dad and they are my heroes but now I am starting to think that men are not nice people and maybe I should give up on the idea of getting married at all. Everyday on social media I hear these stories about men cheating on their wives or raping women and it makes me think that all men want is to satisfy their needs. I do believe that there are bad men and good men and bad women and good women but women in general are quite sensitive and caring and don’t harm in a way men do. 
    I want to know what has the experience of men been with women. Do they generally find them to be rude and acting this way with them?
  6. Completely Agree
    Lilly14 got a reaction from hasanhh in Feeling pressured to get married but my standards are too high   
    And Reveresly, potentially delaying marriage might mean finding someone better.
    I've known girls who waited many years and regretted it, and I've known girls who waited many years and found really amazing guys.
    Marriage is one of the biggest life decisions, @tri-star And remember we have to confront the outcome of both what we decide to do, and also what we decide not do.
    Inshaallah things go well for you!
     
     
     
  7. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from rkazmi33 in Feeling pressured to get married but my standards are too high   
    I hope everything is working out for you now sister inshaallah!
    Alhamdolillah not many aunties talk to me about me needing to get married even though im nearing my 30s, but even when they I do I know they mean well so I don't feel annoyed like the girl in the video.
  8. Completely Agree
    Lilly14 reacted to ali_fatheroforphans in China's ethnic cleansing of Muslim Uyghers   
    Do people seriously believe this is propaganda? 
    I know some Shias think that it's not real what's happening in China (which I think is absolutely ridiculous).
  9. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from Mohammed-Mehdi in Halal weddings   
    Yeah I'm going to do that next time. The last time this happened, it was at a religious family's wedding, and I didn't expect them to bring a videographer in to do that. I learned my lesson. But you're right there might be some secretly horrible people who might film you on their phones. 
  10. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from Kaya in Feeling pressured to get married but my standards are too high   
    I've seen guys in your position get married to nice girls through community match making. It's not impossible!
  11. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from Kaya in Feeling pressured to get married but my standards are too high   
    Go to your local Shia mosque or drive out to Shia mosques in nearby cities and talk to the Maulana and say that you are seeking a wife. There are aunties at the mosque who have matchmaking networks that reach all over the country, and beyond lol...
    There are even Shia matrimonial seminars in the US certain times a year where Shia singles can meet others while keeping it halal. 
    You have to be willing to spend time and money simply to find a wife. Its not uncommon in the Shia community in the US for mom's of single men or single men themself to fly out to several US cities visiting mosques and Islamic seminars until they find a spouse.
     
  12. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from tri-star in Feeling pressured to get married but my standards are too high   
    I've seen guys in your position get married to nice girls through community match making. It's not impossible!
  13. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from Mahdavist in Feeling pressured to get married but my standards are too high   
    I've seen guys in your position get married to nice girls through community match making. It's not impossible!
  14. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from tri-star in Feeling pressured to get married but my standards are too high   
    Go to your local Shia mosque or drive out to Shia mosques in nearby cities and talk to the Maulana and say that you are seeking a wife. There are aunties at the mosque who have matchmaking networks that reach all over the country, and beyond lol...
    There are even Shia matrimonial seminars in the US certain times a year where Shia singles can meet others while keeping it halal. 
    You have to be willing to spend time and money simply to find a wife. Its not uncommon in the Shia community in the US for mom's of single men or single men themself to fly out to several US cities visiting mosques and Islamic seminars until they find a spouse.
     
  15. Completely Agree
    Lilly14 reacted to 2Timeless in 22 and suddenly feel very scared about suitors   
    LOL I can't tell if you're being sarcastic or not. 
  16. Completely Agree
    Lilly14 reacted to Moalfas in Feeling pressured to get married but my standards are too high   
    Brother, nothing in life is free! A woman's going to cost you eitherway !
    Go Halal على بركة الله 
  17. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from Moalfas in Feeling pressured to get married but my standards are too high   
    And Reveresly, potentially delaying marriage might mean finding someone better.
    I've known girls who waited many years and regretted it, and I've known girls who waited many years and found really amazing guys.
    Marriage is one of the biggest life decisions, @tri-star And remember we have to confront the outcome of both what we decide to do, and also what we decide not do.
    Inshaallah things go well for you!
     
     
     
  18. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from Moalfas in Halal weddings   
    Many people decide they want to "have fun" at their weddings, even sometimes people who are regulars at the mosque and/or are from religious backgrounds, so you KNOW they know the rules on what is and isn't acceptable.
    My biggest pet peave is in women/men separated weddings and the female videographer comes in and starts recording all the ladies out of the blue while we're chatting and eating and don't realize it. Excuse me??? I can't tell you how many times this has happened. Like at least warn us to put our hijabs on.
  19. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from Diaz in Halal weddings   
    Many people decide they want to "have fun" at their weddings, even sometimes people who are regulars at the mosque and/or are from religious backgrounds, so you KNOW they know the rules on what is and isn't acceptable.
    My biggest pet peave is in women/men separated weddings and the female videographer comes in and starts recording all the ladies out of the blue while we're chatting and eating and don't realize it. Excuse me??? I can't tell you how many times this has happened. Like at least warn us to put our hijabs on.
  20. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from Diaz in Feeling pressured to get married but my standards are too high   
    And Reveresly, potentially delaying marriage might mean finding someone better.
    I've known girls who waited many years and regretted it, and I've known girls who waited many years and found really amazing guys.
    Marriage is one of the biggest life decisions, @tri-star And remember we have to confront the outcome of both what we decide to do, and also what we decide not do.
    Inshaallah things go well for you!
     
     
     
  21. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from Mahdavist in Halal weddings   
    Many people decide they want to "have fun" at their weddings, even sometimes people who are regulars at the mosque and/or are from religious backgrounds, so you KNOW they know the rules on what is and isn't acceptable.
    My biggest pet peave is in women/men separated weddings and the female videographer comes in and starts recording all the ladies out of the blue while we're chatting and eating and don't realize it. Excuse me??? I can't tell you how many times this has happened. Like at least warn us to put our hijabs on.
  22. Thanks
    Lilly14 got a reaction from Celtic Twilight in Shia lectures or other resource recommendations for a revert?   
    Assalamoalaykom brothers and sisters!
    I'm talking to a fellow sister that is a revert from Christianity and she was confused about Shia and Sunni Islam. I thought about providing the Shia Encyclopedia on Al-Islam .org And while I appreciate its Shia and Sunni hadith evidence. But there is so much info, it might overwhelm a revert...
    So I would be grateful for any resources that could help her please!
    Jazakallah!
  23. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from ali_fatheroforphans in Halal weddings   
    Many people decide they want to "have fun" at their weddings, even sometimes people who are regulars at the mosque and/or are from religious backgrounds, so you KNOW they know the rules on what is and isn't acceptable.
    My biggest pet peave is in women/men separated weddings and the female videographer comes in and starts recording all the ladies out of the blue while we're chatting and eating and don't realize it. Excuse me??? I can't tell you how many times this has happened. Like at least warn us to put our hijabs on.
  24. My Prayers
    Lilly14 got a reaction from ali_fatheroforphans in Shia lectures or other resource recommendations for a revert?   
    Assalamoalaykom brothers and sisters!
    I'm talking to a fellow sister that is a revert from Christianity and she was confused about Shia and Sunni Islam. I thought about providing the Shia Encyclopedia on Al-Islam .org And while I appreciate its Shia and Sunni hadith evidence. But there is so much info, it might overwhelm a revert...
    So I would be grateful for any resources that could help her please!
    Jazakallah!
  25. Like
    Lilly14 got a reaction from tri-star in Feeling pressured to get married but my standards are too high   
    I hope everything is working out for you now sister inshaallah!
    Alhamdolillah not many aunties talk to me about me needing to get married even though im nearing my 30s, but even when they I do I know they mean well so I don't feel annoyed like the girl in the video.
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