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In the Name of God بسم الله


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Everything posted by TIM_WESTWOOD

  1. ^^ ahh ...........So you favour the ban eh??? Have you been promised to someone back HOME ...wherever that may be? I mean he's got to be SYED!!! oH MY GORRD SYED SYED!!! IS HE SYED.....PLEASE CHECK THE MANUFACTURE TAG ON HIS COLLAR...IS HE AN AUTHENTIC PUNJABI SYED!??!?!?! IF SO THEN HE'S MARRIAGE MATERIAL!!!! OH MY GORRD YAAAAAAAR KEEP IT IN DEH FAMILY YAAR...VEE DO NUT VANT OUR DOOR-TERR TO MARRY A NON-POONJAB-EE!!! VEE VANT TO KEEP IT IN DEH TRADITION YAAR!!! VEE LOVE THEE AALOOL BAYT VEE LOVE THEM VERY VERY MUCH AND [edited] ........OUTSIDE MARRIAGE NO GOOD!!!!!! anyways rudeboy ..I'll have you know all the Imams were mixed race breddas!!! well apart from the first three (A.s) eh listen blud....not everyone believes in evolution!! But if you wanna go to the zoo to look for your spouse in the monkey cage thats upto you!! but don't be pushin your ideology on us innit!!! RAHSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!
  2. I would have thought using a hot tip would increase the chances of hair loss. They used to heat up iron rods back in the days and gently s[Edited Out]e the tips against the head of a child so that it would become soft..and the hair wouldn't grow. That's how they lived back then innit...cant diss culture
  3. Gosh I wouldn't like to go on a potty train ever!!! it's like sooooo disgusting....and imagine if it's a 5 hour journey!!! everyone will do some toilet on your head!!! ewww narst-eeeee i'll just stick to the london underground thankyou!!
  4. Yeh like theres really no point in me replying, because I'm just going to say what the others did...but because I'm such a shiachatter I will do so anyway!!!!! Well I ain't a dad (not that I know of anyway!!) but I watch a lot of those programs ..you know like supernanny, and she advises the parents not to give into the tantrums..like someone else said The child is doing it to test the waters..to see how far they can go with you...and you should never give in. I don't know what your ethnicity is, but I really can't imagine a pakistani or arab or iranian or someone else from the third world to get down to the level of the child and hold them by their arms and say in a calm voice, " Jonathan :) ...... Mummy is tired right now....when Jonathan eats all his brussel sprouts then Mummy will give him Ice cream..but for now Jonathan won't be getting any ice cream :) " Which is why you will find white children generally more well behaved (as toddlers....but when they grow up they start calling their parents B*** !! and other such splendid names!!) you see with paki parents its more like "OI HARAMZADA!!!!! EAT YOUR FLIPPING OIL ENCRUSTED LAMB BEFORE I THROW THIS POT OF BOILING WATER ON YOUR TODDLER BATTY!!" so you have to be patient innit...it helps by getting down to the childs level.....and by this I don't mean rolling around with him/her and screaming and ripping your hair out...I actually mean height level, (unless of course you are chinese..which probably means you will see eye to eye with your 2 year old anyway) because the child feels that everyone is against him/her...by kneeling down (i do not mean sujood......gosh sorry I feel like I have to explain everything I say..afterall this is shiachat and everything can and will be taken out of context and used in a court of law) and looking at the child eye to eye.....they may calm down after this..........if all of this fails then kick the little sod where it hurts.............hmm that would be everywhere!! children aint that strong.
  5. thats not unusual nowadays.....more and more people are marrying barbers and such. It's good...goes to show that we shouldn't care what people do for a living. All respect to your husband...I'm sure he cuts hair wonderfully!!
  6. im saying buttered scones with a hint of marmalade..and candlelight fried chicken dinner...what are YOU saying

  7. :o you didn't click YMCA link did you?? Which one was it that you clicked??? ya3ni!!!!!! anyways check this one, it's not finished tho HOLY LAND -_-
  8. a friendly word of advice to all those who suck upto moderators...and ppl like 'wise'muslim [edit: edited the link because it contains vulgarity]
  9. yo alaikum salam-to the bizzle....humdulilah ya3ni still alive..so far so good but these mo fo'ing shiachat moderators are out to get me..i think its because im black! anyways wassup

  10. hmmmm I'd say a concoction of Bangladeshi and Tamil......
  11. My genuine desire to live like an ehtiopian for a day to TRULY acknowledge third world blackness
  12. Keep going everyone, it's only a matter of time before someone opens up a thread asking "How do you imagine shiachatters without clothes" OH MY GAAD OH MY GAAAD WHERE CAN I START........BROTHER - - - - - - , I IMAGINE TO HAVE A 6PACK...CK BOXER SHORTS BIG 12 AND A HALF INCH BICEPS, A REALLY ATTRACTIVE THULFIQAR TATOO ACROSS HIS CHEST, A MOLE UNDERNEATH HIS BELLY BUTTON BLA BLA BLA BLA BLOODY BLAH
  13. According to sheikh al Mufid in Kitab Al-Irshad...Imam Ali Had 27 children...the wives thing is not specific...but he mentions 6 wives by name.....hmmMMMMMM I'd take shiekh mufid to be more reliable anyways.
  14. Hmm yes Aasiyah, Maryam, Khadija and Fatima (Peace be on dem all!!!!) Lady Zainab obviously is bigged up enough but she's not in the 4 cuz then it wouldn't be 4.....it would be 5 innit. But if there was a 5 then she would definitely be in it...this does not mean her status is being lowered at all, so all you " :o OH MY GORDDDDDDDDDDD" kind of people just relax
  15. Greetings chumlings! Please check the following...it is 'Islamic' ...no instruments have been used in this nasheed poem singing style thing....the beat has been done from a hole in the human body!! I'm not going to tell you which hole...but it shall be an exciting chain of events going through the guessing process. Allah HU AKBAR -_-
  16. I had sent this clip to my local Ayatullah AYATULLAH APPROVED SONG!!! And his response was: "AS LONG AS IT IS NOT PLAYED IN A HARAM GATHERING.......IT IS FINE....PEACE NI*GGA!!!"
  17. I feel you...it is quite hard not having any trustworthy people around when you are in serious need of help. Most of my real friends I made when I was around 15/16 and some real ones are still around me alhamdulillah. I pray that you find some real Nikkahs to help you like they helped me. Just cuz I love my nikkahs... I shed blood........4 my nikkahs! Let a nikkah holla.........where ma nikkahs!?!?!?! ALL I WANNA HEAR................IS... RIGHT HERE MY NIKKAHS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  18. ASREWPIES: Wise muslim The Patriot And majority of the moderators excluding Zareen and Smiley and erm some of the new ones Genius Thinkers of the 21st Century: His Royal Highness Hazrat DFC ..may death and destruction rain down on his enemies. Try Hard: Wise Muslim Illegal Immigrant: The Patriot Comedian: Ya Aba Abdillah (hilarious I tell you!!!!) Wannabe Thinkers: Ali Zaki What the ~@*% are you talking about? Rawshni Servidor who the hell are you? Zahidda Syedda..and all those who write "WHAT ABOUT ME???" in every topic Oppressors: Most Moderators - La3natullah ala thalimeen wal insaan who create kathab ya get me Holier than thou: Most of you mo fos!!!!!
  19. Logic tells you that a tomatoe is a fruit....but common sense tells you that a tomatoe doesn't belong in a fruit salad........................YA GET ME BOMBACLATS...wise muslim i'm gonna kill you :) anyways take care everyone
  20. ^ For real for real It's the haram ones that are finger lickin gooood!!!! hMm Yummy
  21. well my signature loves you back...thanks for the lovely present through the post! I told you to stop sending me things though!!!! DUH!!!

  22. bizzy and krazyie are the best in Bone thugs....and if anyone can actually understand what they say...their lyrics are quite surprisingly deep...no offence to any ghetto hoodlums in here.... The ART OF WAR album was too much!!!!!
  23. I had a slight dyslexia attack....It was meant to say "PLACED UPON YOUR FACE"

    i hope you're not hyderabadi..otherwise i wont ever speak to you

  24. and may all of ayeshas deeds be okace upon your face and may the smell of 'LAHORE DREAMS' restaurant travel with you wherever you go!!! All your shalwaar kameez stink of fried onions and ghee

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