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In the Name of God بسم الله

seekingadvice1

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  1. Like
    seekingadvice1 reacted to Reza in The ♥ List   
    Inshallah you will find that special person.
  2. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from EnterMessage in The ♥ List   
    Umm..i want someone who puts me before everyone else..someone who understands that after marriage i am her priority...someone who loves me like the way i love her..someone who is emotionally and physically compatible with me...i dont want a hoor princess but something about her should click for me..i have fell for innocent faces before but i wish i could get someone who is from the outside what she is from the inside.
  3. Like
    seekingadvice1 reacted to yusur317 in The ♥ List   
    Some of the posts here are absolutely adorable!  However, I noticed, in reality most people do not go by the "lists". For example, a family friend wanted a wife who was tall, fair and knew her way around the kitchen. He married the complete opposite of that. 5 years since, and he's head over heels for her! So don't be too focused on these lists. Although most lists on here were vague. Handsome or decent looking can mean different things to each person. So I suppose that works  As for cooking, when my father married my mother, her cooking wasn't top notch. But his mother taught her everything she knows today. My mother is now known for her cooking, especially her kebabs! My dad can cook too, some dishes better than my mother. So don't worry about this too much either. She can learn, and so can he. 
    Anyway, here's my list: 
    1) Mum's sweet dolma 
    2) behesht's Fesenjoon 
    3)Baba's lasagne 
    the moment i see durshaneh (طرشانة) ---> 
     
     
  4. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from starlight in Husband/Fiance wants to get intimate before wedding 'reception'   
    Having been in a similar position like the OP, I strongly advise you not to get intimate before your wedding reception. We got intimate and eventually our wedding didn't happen. I am not saying anything of that sort would happen with you. But its better to follow society's norms and wait for the reception. I didn't wait and now that things didn't work out I regret getting intimate with my wife. 
    May Allah bless you with a happy married life. I was also a believer of nikkah first and wedding reception a few months later but after what I have gone through I strongly suggest that you expedite your reception. 
  5. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from ~ThePond~ in Marriage Issue: Need Help(Advice+Duas)   
    JazakAllah...i have already tried that..my father went to meet him but he was not allowed inside..they said the matter is over from their side.
    But yes I believe in miracles. I believe in the power of duas. I will continue my prayers and InshaAllah Allah would listen to my prayers. God says the only thing which can change destiny is dua so I am still hopeful. Hopelessnes is a sin.
    Please remember me in your prayers. If someone else prays for you it has a very strong effect so please pray that her dad agrees somehow InshaAllah.
  6. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from thuglife in Moving On From Heartbreak   
    "Love the girl you marry". I did that and she still left.
    It is more difficult to move on if u are not the one to initiate the breakup. I got dumped by my own wife she left me for her father.
  7. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from apofomysback in Moving On From Heartbreak   
    "Love the girl you marry". I did that and she still left.
    It is more difficult to move on if u are not the one to initiate the breakup. I got dumped by my own wife she left me for her father.
  8. Like
    seekingadvice1 reacted to hasanhh in Shiamatch V. Shiaspouse V. Heavenlymatch V. Shaadi   
    I know a few who have successful marriages and used web-matching.
     
    The big advantage is that you can talk/write with and find some who are 'compatible' without being at risk, especially if you use a library or web café inter-link.
     
    I also seriously suggest that since you or anyone else are not likely to find someone close to where your family is, that you hire a private investigator.
     
    Check not only for general records but also 'hidden' debt.
  9. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from yafatimaalzahra in Feelings Of Emptiness-Cure Needed   
    InshaAllah..i have accepted the fact that it is impossible to forget her. But yes I need to somehow stop having feelings for her. I dont know how I can stop having feelings for her so I can only hope that with time the feelings go away. Remember me in your prayers.
    I disagree. Any love outside of marriage has negative consequences. And no matter how much you have enjoyed being in love it is not worth the pain you go through once you have lost it. The pain is way more.
  10. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from :Ruffles in Feelings Of Emptiness-Cure Needed   
    InshaAllah..i have accepted the fact that it is impossible to forget her. But yes I need to somehow stop having feelings for her. I dont know how I can stop having feelings for her so I can only hope that with time the feelings go away. Remember me in your prayers.
    I disagree. Any love outside of marriage has negative consequences. And no matter how much you have enjoyed being in love it is not worth the pain you go through once you have lost it. The pain is way more.
  11. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from Khadim uz Zahra in Marriage Issue: Need Help(Advice+Duas)   
  12. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from Abd az Zahra in Man Harrasing Potential Wife   
    Only trust yourself and noone else. The only person you can rely on is yourself. Blindly trusting the other person just becuase you love her is not healthy
    Trust is something which needs to be won.
    Just explain that you dont like the fact that she is friends with a non mahram. Explain it from an islamic point of view. A girl and boy can not be friends. And this clearly seems to be beyond friendship.
    Just discuss your point of view with her if she truly loves you another guys friendship wont matter to her. You should be her everything and another guys friendship shud not matter to her. Specially a guy who shows interest in her.
  13. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from StarryNight in Man Harrasing Potential Wife   
    Only trust yourself and noone else. The only person you can rely on is yourself. Blindly trusting the other person just becuase you love her is not healthy
    Trust is something which needs to be won.
    Just explain that you dont like the fact that she is friends with a non mahram. Explain it from an islamic point of view. A girl and boy can not be friends. And this clearly seems to be beyond friendship.
    Just discuss your point of view with her if she truly loves you another guys friendship wont matter to her. You should be her everything and another guys friendship shud not matter to her. Specially a guy who shows interest in her.
  14. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from Waiting for HIM in Man Harrasing Potential Wife   
    Only trust yourself and noone else. The only person you can rely on is yourself. Blindly trusting the other person just becuase you love her is not healthy
    Trust is something which needs to be won.
    Just explain that you dont like the fact that she is friends with a non mahram. Explain it from an islamic point of view. A girl and boy can not be friends. And this clearly seems to be beyond friendship.
    Just discuss your point of view with her if she truly loves you another guys friendship wont matter to her. You should be her everything and another guys friendship shud not matter to her. Specially a guy who shows interest in her.
  15. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from Ali Musaaa :) in Marriage Issue: Need Help(Advice+Duas)   
    I am in the taqleed of Ayatullah Sayeed Al Hakim. He allows mutah with a virgin without fathers permission provided you dont have sexual intercourse.
    P.S This topic is not about mutah.
  16. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from SlaveOfAllah14 in Marriage Issue: Need Help(Advice+Duas)   
    JazakAllah for the kind words.
    Yes have been reading ziarat e ashura everday. I hope Allah gives me peace of heart and mind soon InshaAllah and a great wife InshaAllah in place of her so that i never regret what i lost. All the people who have given me advice on this thread i really am thankful to all of them. You people have been of a lot of help and support. And your reassurances have really helped me in this tuf time since i have very few friends. I will always pray for you brothers and sisters, may God shower His blessings on you all InshaAllah.
  17. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from SlaveOfAllah14 in Marriage Issue: Need Help(Advice+Duas)   
    I contacted a local maulana and he advised against it. We didnt want to put an Alim in a situation where we are outside the girls house and the dad refuses to let him in. Which is what exactly happened when my father went to meet him. The prob is that the girl gave up, he would have simply told the alim that our daughter is ready to get married to someone else which she was. She just said that i have accepted my fathers decision. How could i break and into her house. Considering the situation no alim wud hav supported us either since she got engaged after the next two days nd agreed with her father's choice which made our case weak in front of the alim. Only if she had not lost hope and atleast told her dad that she wont get engaged or married to someone else, taking the alim wud have helped. I have no option now but to accept this as fate. Since nothing can be done anymore. I prayed so much nd yet God didnt give her to me. Maybe He was saving me from something really disastrous..He is all knowing all powerful..i just pray that God duz show me in this life that y this happened to me. And im sure He wud show it by giving me someone better InshaAllah..i just pray for my peace of mind and that somehow God takes her out of my mind and heart..nd that this stops hurting..10 years of memories are difficult to overwrite but I am hopeful. Someone asked Imam Ali(A.S) that how should one know if a difficulty is a punishment from God or a trial. Imam Ali(A.S) said that if the difficulty takes you away from God it is a punishment and if it brings you near to God it is a trial. Alhamdulilah I have gotten closer to Allah. So I am hopeful InshaAllah Allah would help me succeed in this trial and reward me someone better InshaAllah.
  18. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from Abu Hadi in Marriage Issue: Need Help(Advice+Duas)   
    JazakAllah for the kind words.
    Yes have been reading ziarat e ashura everday. I hope Allah gives me peace of heart and mind soon InshaAllah and a great wife InshaAllah in place of her so that i never regret what i lost. All the people who have given me advice on this thread i really am thankful to all of them. You people have been of a lot of help and support. And your reassurances have really helped me in this tuf time since i have very few friends. I will always pray for you brothers and sisters, may God shower His blessings on you all InshaAllah.
  19. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from Fatima NMA in Marriage Issue: Need Help(Advice+Duas)   
    JazakAllah for the kind words.
    Yes have been reading ziarat e ashura everday. I hope Allah gives me peace of heart and mind soon InshaAllah and a great wife InshaAllah in place of her so that i never regret what i lost. All the people who have given me advice on this thread i really am thankful to all of them. You people have been of a lot of help and support. And your reassurances have really helped me in this tuf time since i have very few friends. I will always pray for you brothers and sisters, may God shower His blessings on you all InshaAllah.
  20. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from tearsofregret in Marriage Issue: Need Help(Advice+Duas)   
    I contacted a local maulana and he advised against it. We didnt want to put an Alim in a situation where we are outside the girls house and the dad refuses to let him in. Which is what exactly happened when my father went to meet him. The prob is that the girl gave up, he would have simply told the alim that our daughter is ready to get married to someone else which she was. She just said that i have accepted my fathers decision. How could i break and into her house. Considering the situation no alim wud hav supported us either since she got engaged after the next two days nd agreed with her father's choice which made our case weak in front of the alim. Only if she had not lost hope and atleast told her dad that she wont get engaged or married to someone else, taking the alim wud have helped. I have no option now but to accept this as fate. Since nothing can be done anymore. I prayed so much nd yet God didnt give her to me. Maybe He was saving me from something really disastrous..He is all knowing all powerful..i just pray that God duz show me in this life that y this happened to me. And im sure He wud show it by giving me someone better InshaAllah..i just pray for my peace of mind and that somehow God takes her out of my mind and heart..nd that this stops hurting..10 years of memories are difficult to overwrite but I am hopeful. Someone asked Imam Ali(A.S) that how should one know if a difficulty is a punishment from God or a trial. Imam Ali(A.S) said that if the difficulty takes you away from God it is a punishment and if it brings you near to God it is a trial. Alhamdulilah I have gotten closer to Allah. So I am hopeful InshaAllah Allah would help me succeed in this trial and reward me someone better InshaAllah.
  21. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from Fatima NMA in Marriage Issue: Need Help(Advice+Duas)   
    I contacted a local maulana and he advised against it. We didnt want to put an Alim in a situation where we are outside the girls house and the dad refuses to let him in. Which is what exactly happened when my father went to meet him. The prob is that the girl gave up, he would have simply told the alim that our daughter is ready to get married to someone else which she was. She just said that i have accepted my fathers decision. How could i break and into her house. Considering the situation no alim wud hav supported us either since she got engaged after the next two days nd agreed with her father's choice which made our case weak in front of the alim. Only if she had not lost hope and atleast told her dad that she wont get engaged or married to someone else, taking the alim wud have helped. I have no option now but to accept this as fate. Since nothing can be done anymore. I prayed so much nd yet God didnt give her to me. Maybe He was saving me from something really disastrous..He is all knowing all powerful..i just pray that God duz show me in this life that y this happened to me. And im sure He wud show it by giving me someone better InshaAllah..i just pray for my peace of mind and that somehow God takes her out of my mind and heart..nd that this stops hurting..10 years of memories are difficult to overwrite but I am hopeful. Someone asked Imam Ali(A.S) that how should one know if a difficulty is a punishment from God or a trial. Imam Ali(A.S) said that if the difficulty takes you away from God it is a punishment and if it brings you near to God it is a trial. Alhamdulilah I have gotten closer to Allah. So I am hopeful InshaAllah Allah would help me succeed in this trial and reward me someone better InshaAllah.
  22. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from Gotham in Marriage Issue: Need Help(Advice+Duas)   
    I was married to her..it was a mutually agreed mutah with the view of permanent marriage..i took a fatwa from my marja and he allowed it. I know it wud hav been so much easier if v wernt sexual...but wats done is done..i can only repent..I have been praying for forgivness for the past month InshaAllah God will forgiv me..but wats happening now is so wrong at all levels to all the families involved nd also to the poor guy hu has no clue wat he is getting into
  23. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from tearsofregret in Marriage Issue: Need Help(Advice+Duas)   
    JazakAllah...i have already tried that..my father went to meet him but he was not allowed inside..they said the matter is over from their side.
    But yes I believe in miracles. I believe in the power of duas. I will continue my prayers and InshaAllah Allah would listen to my prayers. God says the only thing which can change destiny is dua so I am still hopeful. Hopelessnes is a sin.
    Please remember me in your prayers. If someone else prays for you it has a very strong effect so please pray that her dad agrees somehow InshaAllah.
  24. Like
    seekingadvice1 got a reaction from Fatima NMA in Marriage Issue: Need Help(Advice+Duas)   
    JazakAllah...i have already tried that..my father went to meet him but he was not allowed inside..they said the matter is over from their side.
    But yes I believe in miracles. I believe in the power of duas. I will continue my prayers and InshaAllah Allah would listen to my prayers. God says the only thing which can change destiny is dua so I am still hopeful. Hopelessnes is a sin.
    Please remember me in your prayers. If someone else prays for you it has a very strong effect so please pray that her dad agrees somehow InshaAllah.
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