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In the Name of God بسم الله

enigma313

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  1. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from ShiaChat Mod in Love and Suffering   
    I cannot say enough good things about your blogs, @Qa'im, thank you so much for your insight and wisdom.  God bless you. 
  2. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from wolverine in Love and Suffering   
    I cannot say enough good things about your blogs, @Qa'im, thank you so much for your insight and wisdom.  God bless you. 
  3. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from Abraram in Love and Suffering   
    I cannot say enough good things about your blogs, @Qa'im, thank you so much for your insight and wisdom.  God bless you. 
  4. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from DigitalUmmah in Love and Suffering   
    I cannot say enough good things about your blogs, @Qa'im, thank you so much for your insight and wisdom.  God bless you. 
  5. Like
    enigma313 reacted to Qa'im in Hoor al-`Ayn are not White Chicks   
    Fabulous, the article has been critiqued on its use of the word "Muslim" and "Caucasian", which were normative and not technical. This blog obviously touched a nerve with some people, which to me makes it a big success.
  6. Like
    enigma313 reacted to Abu Hadi in Hoor al-`Ayn are not White Chicks   
    My father in law, who is an alim, explained it this way. 
    First, we should not focus on this subject. We all have a long way to go to get there, Paradise, if we ever manage to get there. Getting too much into these discussions is counter productive, at this point. That is why the Holy Quran did not go too much into details regarding the Hour Al Ayn. It is sufficient for us to know at this point the these women exists and that they are pure and pleasing to us. 
    Second, each houriat is 'custom made' for her husband. So if her husband likes white skin, European features, blond hair, etc, then she will be that way. If he likes darker skin and darker hair, she will be that way. The sole purpose of her existence is to please her husband, so whatever pleases her husband, that is what she will be like. 
    There is no purpose in focusing on this, though, because this doesn't exist on earth, in this dunya. The purpose of a wife, in the dunya, is not only this purpose. She has many other responsibilities, to her children, parents, family, community, and to herself and most importantly to Allah(s.w.a). Sometimes there is concordance between these responsibilities, sometimes not. The marriage relationship in this dunya is mostly a test and a responsibility, and we get some pleasure out of it here and there. But in the next world, marriage has a different purpose, and spouses have a different purpose. Since this is something we have never experienced, we are not expected to fully comprehend it. 
    It is sufficient to know that it exists, and is a reality and act as a motivation for us to be good, and obey Allah(s.w.a) so that someday we may get this. 
     
  7. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from Mansur Bakhtiari in Hoor al-`Ayn are not White Chicks   
    Again, another superb piece @Qa'im, thank you for your wisdom and insight. 
  8. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from alHussein in Hoor al-`Ayn are not White Chicks   
    Again, another superb piece @Qa'im, thank you for your wisdom and insight. 
  9. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from Purged in Friends of the Mahdi   
    The Imam replied, “You can find them in the far sides of the world. They are those, whose lives are so simple, whose abodes move from place to another, who, if they are seen they, will not be known, if they are absent, they will not be missed, if they become ill, they will not be visited, if they propose to a woman, they will not be married, and if they die, their funerals will not be attended. It is they, who divide their wealth among them, who visit each others' graves, and who never disagree even if their countries are different.” 
     This is so true.
    Thank you brother Qaim, for another excellent blog entry.  May Allah reward you in this world and the next. 
  10. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from Endtimes in Friends of the Mahdi   
    The Imam replied, “You can find them in the far sides of the world. They are those, whose lives are so simple, whose abodes move from place to another, who, if they are seen they, will not be known, if they are absent, they will not be missed, if they become ill, they will not be visited, if they propose to a woman, they will not be married, and if they die, their funerals will not be attended. It is they, who divide their wealth among them, who visit each others' graves, and who never disagree even if their countries are different.” 
     This is so true.
    Thank you brother Qaim, for another excellent blog entry.  May Allah reward you in this world and the next. 
  11. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from zeesh_ali110 in Sisters-Choose The God-Fearing Man   
    Are you serious? Do you think men like this actually exist? You live in a fantasy world....just saying.
  12. Like
    enigma313 reacted to DigitalUmmah in Sisters-Choose The God-Fearing Man   
    one who treats those who can not benefit him in any way with the same respect he would give to those who could give him a million pounds
  13. Like
    enigma313 reacted to DigitalUmmah in Sisters-Choose The God-Fearing Man   
    I'm not bragging about how much of a bad boy I am....but one time, I pulled the USB stick out of my PC without it being safe for it to eject. 
  14. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from Pearl3112 in Sisters-Choose The God-Fearing Man   
    Are you serious? Do you think men like this actually exist? You live in a fantasy world....just saying.
  15. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from Al Hadi in Islam and Feminism   
    Wow, you're ignorance is so deep.  The hardest years begin after the age of 4.  
    So only women who are thick and dumb stay at home, if they are intelligent they go out and work.  Spewing even more ignorance here.  I am educated to degree level, choose to work part time in television, and spend all my free time with my children. 
    I know women who are talented in the home and in the workplace, and they would surely wipe the floor with someone as ignorant as you. 
    The number of women with mental health issues is on the rise, as is the case of the number of women being treated for eating disorders, and the list goes on.
    Oh and btw, did I mention or emphasise enough how ignorant you are, and how insulting your comments are too. 
  16. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from Al Hadi in Islam and Feminism   
    MashAllah Qaim, you're so talented.  Please consider publishing your blogs in a book format.
    You made so many good points in this blog, esp. the one about women and working.  I hated leaving my baby boy with my elderly parents to return to work.  Isa was only 4mths old when I did so, and the guilt never left me. I ended up being a wage slave.  Sometimes baby would keep me awake the whole night, and then I would somehow stagger into work like a zombie.  I would think to myself on the way into work, this is isn't freedom or liberation.....THIS IS HELL. 
  17. Like
    enigma313 reacted to Bakir in Islam and Feminism   
    Excess of data isnt much different from absolute abscence of it.
    Your discourse seems to be biased by a personal reaction against the worst forms of "feminism" that eclipses all the other approaches. Curiously enough, the people that could be described to be within those "feminist circles" tend to be ignorant of the original feminist ideas. Also, as King, I don't see a real link a priori between feminism and capitalism at all.
    I am not a feminist in that sense myself, but hold a different view of what feminism means by reading the authors I think I have to read, for instance Simone de Beauvoir. Were I to consider EVEN MENTION groups like FEMEN, I wouldn't be talking about "feminism". It is a poor way to make a point that is not even worth making this way.
    I expected a much better discourse, especially because we don't have to use such poor resources to make a good point on feminism and the islamic point of view. There are great Egyptian authors whose research and articles of female psychology and Islam would be more constructive than a critique addressing FEMEN or other groups that are popularly hated. And definitely, such approch would serve a purpose here in ShiaChat. I doubt anyone among us would support the current "pseudo feminists" ideals.
  18. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from Gaius I. Caesar in Islam and Feminism   
    Wow, you're ignorance is so deep.  The hardest years begin after the age of 4.  
    So only women who are thick and dumb stay at home, if they are intelligent they go out and work.  Spewing even more ignorance here.  I am educated to degree level, choose to work part time in television, and spend all my free time with my children. 
    I know women who are talented in the home and in the workplace, and they would surely wipe the floor with someone as ignorant as you. 
    The number of women with mental health issues is on the rise, as is the case of the number of women being treated for eating disorders, and the list goes on.
    Oh and btw, did I mention or emphasise enough how ignorant you are, and how insulting your comments are too. 
  19. Like
    enigma313 reacted to Qa'im in Islam and Feminism   
    If you are working full-time after your child is only 3 or 4 years old, then that can have detrimental affects on your child. They'd be spending most of their time at school and in front of the TV during the most important years of the development of their brain and their personality. You cannot rely on the education system to teach your children ethics or practical life skills. On the contrary, you may even have to reverse some of the negative affects that public schooling can have a child. How much energy can realistically you give to them when you are working and under stress, on top of other responsibilities? I think there is a middle way: take the first few years off, then work part-time (or go to school) until they hit adolescence. In our religion, a woman can also demand a wage for household responsibilities, demand a dower of her choice, demand a maid for cleaning or nursing, etc. These tools need to be revitalized for the modern age, even if it means that men work longer hours and families live within humble means.
    As a child, I was able to do extra reading and math, French, Arabic, Islamic classes, Quran, sports, and eat only home-cooked meals, all because my mother took those years off. Most of all, she gave me the love, attention, and energy I needed as a child, without relying much on babysitters (the few times that I did attend a babysitter, I was exposed to some negative behaviour and television content). She was able to become a teacher, memorize the Quran, volunteer at my school, exercise, have a social life, etc. Any lifestyle we choose will require some sacrifices, it's about what you prioritize. As a highschool teacher, I learned a lot about the parent-child relationship and how it affects their school and social life.
  20. Like
    enigma313 reacted to Qa'im in Islam and Feminism   
    I have no disagreement that women should have equal access, equal pay, and equal opportunity everywhere. Even in traditional Islamic civilization, women were able to do almost everything men did (being judges or governors are notable exceptions, and I think that can be revisited. In my view, even Muslim men should not be judges in non-Muslim systems, but that's a different topic). The question we are brainstorming is: is gender a social construction and a function, or is it biologically/neurologically/chemically/anatomically/psychologically rooted? Most reasonable people would say that it is both. Even the LGBT movement, which argues that people can be born with a male or female brain, would therefore agree that there is such a thing as a male or female brain, or a male and female anatomical appearance ("lipstick feminism"). So we must ask ourselves, do these differences have social consequences? Are we attracted to the same things in the other gender? Is motherhood and fatherhood exactly the same - and if they are different, what are the consequences or growing up without a mother or a father in a divorced or gay household? Why have almost all cultures used the exact same division of labour for generations? My view is, in answering these questions, we will conclude that men and women should have the same rights, but that their behaviour and affect in society will generally differ. And this is a good thing - it brings balance to the system. Men and women need one another to live a fulfilled life.
    The modern age is unique in that the nature of work is very different. Our jobs are not just limited to hunters, gatherers, farmers, builders, and merchants - aka jobs that require a lot of physical labour and travel, and so therefore have been historically dominated by men. Today, we have more educators, desk work, office work, writers, counselors, librarians, accountants, community organizers - i.e., more varied jobs that do not require any physiological function, and therefore will be gender neutral. It is natural that men and women will work, and their wages should be identical. But wage equality does not equal earnings equality or interests equality: men and women make different decisions in life.
  21. Like
    enigma313 reacted to Qa'im in Islam and Feminism   
    Let us keep the conversation going inshaAllah.
    So just to clarify, this is not a thread that is going against all of the ideas and achievements of feminists. I think most people today instinctively agree with suffrage, equality of opportunity/access, and equal wages. I can tell you, however, that the movement is transforming among millennials, and not just with a minority subsection of the population. As a school teacher, and as someone who is doing his masters in a liberal arts program, I have some insight on the trends on campus and even among Muslim youth. I am talking about the feminism of people like Amber Rose and Lena Dunham, who are immensely popular today on the blogosphere. I am talking about third wave feminism, which is a pornographic ("The Vag.ina Monologues", Newman & White), queer-focused (BLM, LGBT, anti-cis), pro late term abortion, pro raunchy fashion and nudity (#freethenipple , sl.utwalk , divorcing harassment from clothing - a clear contradiction of 33:59 in the Quran), enshrining narrative over fact (the wage gap - which is oft-repeated even by Obama and Clinton, rape culture, folkloric myths that won't die), anti-marriage (have fun: https://www.google.ca/?gws_rd=ssl#q=feminist+views+on+marriage), anti nuclear families, and straight-up man-hating (mansplaining, manspreading, toxic masculinity, which are periodically discussed on Buzzfeed, Vox, and VICE).
    Events promoting all of the above have taken place on university campuses (I have attended 3 universities), and our community is not immune to this narrative. Just look at your average tumblr blog, and ask yourself if Lady Fatima would have endorsed all of this. Strange enough, men who are straight and white are even being banned from some events: https://www.google.ca/?gws_rd=ssl#q=straight+white+male+banned+events
    Furthermore, the movement, which was initially established to bring women up, ignores and fails to address issues where men are at a disadvantage in society today: graduation, violence, addiction, mental health, homelessness - all issues that affect men disproportionately. Even a 2015 Cornell study noted that women have a 2-1 advantage going for the same jobs, because firms must now fill gender quotas. Christina Hoff Sommers and Karen Straughan have highlighted many of the shortcomings of modern feminism, while still promoting equal rights and opportunity.
    As for pornography and prostitution, it is true that 1980s Second Wave Feminists were against these things, because they objectified women. But that is not the dominant position among Third Wave Feminist theorists. And these are not just loony extremist ideas - more than 44% of Canadians (where I live) believe that prostitution should be legalized. These aren't just misogynists, this is the general population and a large subsection of modern feminists.
    But you see, many third wave feminists are against marriage altogether, because it is patriarchal and oppressive. Strong criticisms of marriage go all the way back to Wollstonecraft. You can read their perspective below:
    http://www.xojane.com/issues/unpopular-opinion-marriage-will-never-be-a-feminist-choice
    http://www.feministcurrent.com/2016/02/12/11-reasons-not-to-get-married/
    And this is an article about divorce: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/men/thinking-man/11824814/Is-feminism-destroying-the-institution-of-marriage.html
    So we can promote marriage in our communities by denouncing certain feminist tropes, including this vile men vs. women dialectic, the LGBT movement, free love (Mary Nichols, one of the 19th century founders of feminism, believed in free love, same with the popular modern feminist Gloria Steinem). We should promote modest/elegant dress and healthy eating; not the rape-culture narrative and body-positivism.
    In my community, there are a disproportionate amount of single and divorced ladies who simply cannot find desirable partners to marry. It is becoming an epidemic in almost every community I have visited. We have to review why this is happening, and my argument is feminism is partly responsible for this problem for contributing to free love culture and preferring education and career over marriage, pushing women to marry closer to 30 or 40.
    --
    I
    Their utopia is our dystopia. I will leave you with an authentic hadith on the end times:
    Imam as-Sadiq said: "You will see moral degradation become manifest, and men being satisfied by men, and women being satisfied by women. And you will see men earn a livelihood from homosexuality and women earn a livelihood from prostitution. And you will see a man pay to have sex with women. And you will see women overcome their husbands, and work for what he desires, and spend on their husbands. And you will see men putting their women and girls to work, and be satisfied with worthless food and drink. And you will see women give themselves to the disbelievers. And you will see the women become powerful in the land, and have power over all the affairs, and nothing could come about except what she desires. And you will see ungratefulness becoming manifest, and belittling of the parents, and they will be from the worst condition of people for the children, and they will be happy defaming their own parents." (al-Kafi, vol. 8, pg. 36 – 42, hadith #7)
  22. Like
    enigma313 reacted to Qa'im in Islam and Feminism   
    Many feminist thinkers have been against the traditional gender roles, because they limit women to the domestic sphere, thereby having less economic and political influence and independence in society. Gilman and Goldman are key thinkers that argued for the economic emancipation of women, breaking out of the private sphere of unpaid childcare and housework. Gayle Rubin has also encouraged female economic independence so that they would not need to rely on male domination in heterosexual marriages. So yes, practically speaking, second wave feminists encouraged women to finish their education and attain economic independence before thinking about marrying. The problem today is that economic independence takes a long time to attain (a bachelor of arts won't get you far), and even then, most households cannot subsist on one income alone. Again, I can understand the reasons for female economic independence, but it comes with several costs: delaying marriage, higher chance of fornication and casual relationships, having less family time during marriage, etc. In Islamic fiqh, you can come to a middle ground. Women can pursue a career, or be paid for their housework and rearing, but marriage and having children remains an early priority.
    Many third wave feminists are against the institution of marriage altogether, or large aspects of it. Even a movement like Black Lives Matter, which was founded by feminists and LGBT activists, does not mention "fathers" on their website, and see heterosexual and nuclear families as an arm of white supremacy.
    More consumers, more bank accounts, more workers (including more competition for the same jobs, which lowers wages), longer open hours, more industries. It's a match made in heaven.
    And what is women's emancipation? First, second, and third wave feminists have different definitions and goals, but all three reek of utopianism.
    Well there were many second wave feminists that criticized the objectification of women in pornography, for example, but third wave feminism - which is pretty much feminism's logical conclusion - has promoted legalizing prostitution, sl.ut walks, naked protests, etc. The agenda to get women to wear less and absolve them of all shame and blame plays right into the hands of misogynists and players.
  23. Like
    enigma313 reacted to Haimi in Islam and Feminism   
    Since you're still their mother, guess it was a treat from Allah swt and you just passed it very well, don't worry about it.
    I'm sure Isa will proud to you.
  24. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from Ali al-Abdullah in Islam and Feminism   
    MashAllah Qaim, you're so talented.  Please consider publishing your blogs in a book format.
    You made so many good points in this blog, esp. the one about women and working.  I hated leaving my baby boy with my elderly parents to return to work.  Isa was only 4mths old when I did so, and the guilt never left me. I ended up being a wage slave.  Sometimes baby would keep me awake the whole night, and then I would somehow stagger into work like a zombie.  I would think to myself on the way into work, this is isn't freedom or liberation.....THIS IS HELL. 
  25. Like
    enigma313 got a reaction from Qa'im in Islam and Feminism   
    MashAllah Qaim, you're so talented.  Please consider publishing your blogs in a book format.
    You made so many good points in this blog, esp. the one about women and working.  I hated leaving my baby boy with my elderly parents to return to work.  Isa was only 4mths old when I did so, and the guilt never left me. I ended up being a wage slave.  Sometimes baby would keep me awake the whole night, and then I would somehow stagger into work like a zombie.  I would think to myself on the way into work, this is isn't freedom or liberation.....THIS IS HELL. 
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