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In the Name of God بسم الله

The Strategist

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  1. True, becoming involved with a potential alcohol abuser is a disaster. There is , I believe a saying attributed to the Prophet (pbuh) that 'to give your daughter in marriage to a drinker is as if you have given her away in prostitution'. However, in this instance, the guy has volunteered the information, making it so much easier for the girl and her family to make a judgement call. What happens in such situations where such information is not so easily available. What if the guy is a closet alcoholic? What if he isn't an alcoholic yet but hits the bottle during the course of the marriage? What are the guarantees that he will not? What is it that the parents and the girl should really watch out for which will make them make a decent bet that the guy will never experiment with alcohol, ever? Is it religious grounding, breeding, genes, family background or what? Would the girl or the parents be willing to accept a potential alcohol consumer if he were to be financially well off, hold an apparently secure job, drive a flashy sophisticated car or live in a fashionable address? All said and done- in the example you have mentioned- I think the girl has still done much better than a single unattached financially independent spinster of her own age, by having ventured into marriage, even with a not so 'reformed clubber, womaniser and drinker'. Just making a point. :huh:
  2. ^^^ Is it that the Sunni/Mossad/CIA/Al Qaeda/Wahabi/Baath are trying to divide the Shia ithna Ashari from uniting together and speaking as one voice? It would be an ultimate shame if the Shia of Iraq- who were oppressed for such a long period- were to entertain discord amongst themselves and pursue narrow minded agendas. If the story is true, there should be an immediate reconcilliation between the disputant Shia factions. That Bush flew to Iraq- according to the rumour- to prop up Maliki's resolve to take an antagonist stance against fellow Shia is perhaps bad news. Unless ofcourse the whole rift is a farce acted out to fool America. Which isn't impossible. Politics is such a game of bluff.
  3. Is the 'wedding conspiracy'. Dissuading marriage by the very ceremony that is meant to announce and celebrate it.
  4. i deleted it. will repost it however for your reading pleasure: how about, 'no greater grief than to remember sorrow when gladness is at hand' ? ;) Temporary lives is expected of him.
  5. Harbouring ethnic, racial, national, social, fiscal, cultural or any such bias against a fellow Muslim is everything the Islam I understand stands opposed to. Such bias is called ta 'asub, which is a major sin in Islam. The natural tendency to feel comfortable with 'alike' is expected be based on the similarity in religious and ideological conviction (and the love of the Prophet (pbuh) and his Ahl ul Bayt (as) ) rather than the colour of the skin, language spoken or regional origin. Now, that can be a serious threat to some! Far more serious than an encounter with FBI or like.
  6. Perhaps. Optimism is the lifeblood of Islam and Muslims. The reality somewhat sucks, whether you admit it or not. Which is why the best prayer during the Occultation of the Imam of the Time (atf) is to plead for his return. Other than that, create threads like this one on unique and rare discussion boards like this. Unless ofcourse, you prefer writing newsletters. This ain't a time to flirt. We have serious problems we need to address. ;) ( Just kidding) She isn't the FBI. Besides, those who live in the 'free' West today are no longer so. Especially Muslims. Post 9/11, there is no security for anyone, least of all Muslims, no matter what you kid yourself with. So, open the doors to fellow Muslims, especially the Shia, more so those who have reverted.
  7. I am begining to like the bitterness already. Bleed it out. Let the sick, sleeping and suffering community become painfully aware of what ailments it is inflicted with, lest it should die in sleep in it's ignorance.
  8. (bismillah) Al-An'am (The Cattle) Sura 6 Ayat 38 æóãóÇ ãöä ÏóÂÈøóÉò Ýöí ÇáÃóÑúÖö æóáÇó ØóÇÆöÑò íóØöíÑõ ÈöÌóäóÇÍóíúåö ÅöáÇøó Ãõãóãñ ÃóãúËóÇáõßõã ãøóÇ ÝóÑøóØúäóÇ Ýöí Wama min dabbatin fee alardi wala tairin yateeru bijanahayhi illa omamun amthalukum ma farratna fee alkitabi min shayin thumma ila rabbihim yuhsharoona There is not an animal (that lives) on the earth, nor a being that flies on its wings, but (forms part of) communities like you. Nothing have we omitted from the Book, and they (all) shall be gathered to their Lord in the end. ( Yousuf Ali ) _______________________________________________________________________ A community like any other- of man, woman, beast , bird, reptile or insect- the Shia are unique. The Shia community- in real or virtual world- possesses one particular uniqueness which none else does. THAT is the institution of organised mourning for it's beloved role models- the family of the Prophet (pbuh)- the Ahl ul Bayt. Worldwide, the Shia unite like no other- in an incredible display of heartfelt grief - in the moving passionate retelling of the tragedy of Karbala every year, year after year. However, after the accomplishment of this purpose, the Shia- living as communities in various parts of the world- dissolve and disperse. They become absorbed in their daily grind. Other than some who keep in touch- as individuals or as families- mostly social contact, the Shia become strangers to one another until the next Ashura. Compared to say the Sunni, the Jews, the Mormons, the Free Masons, the Christians, the Sikhs, the Wahabis, the Ismailis, the Buddhists, the Hindus and like, how efficient are the Shia in making life on earth easier for one another as a religious, social and political community? Mutual help and assistance in various aspects of life on earth for fellow co religionists has been much emphasised by the Prophet (pbuh) and the Ai'imma of the Shia. How informed or loyal are the Shia to these teachings? How much of an inter racial, inter ethnic, international interaction do they have in terms of business, marriage or plain social contact with one another? Is there room for improvement? Are there any ideas that can empower the community by an acknowledgement of its ethnic and national diversity and by inducing more interaction? Will creation of a stronger sense of community- not limited by such boundaries as nationalities, ethnicities, social and financial standing, gender segregation and discrimination- make the Shia a better group to be a part of, in a worldly sense ?!? Or are the various different ethnicities, nationalities, races, economic groups, business groups et al in the community better off left to fend for themselves as insular entities until they discover a unifying sense of purpose for a brief period of ten to forty days during the next Ashura mourning?
  9. Kama Sutra might fetch better results.
  10. Alhamdolillah. More such culturally inert fresh islamic perspectives will revive Islam even for the 'Muslims'! That is what it is.
  11. Responsibilities are something you cannot escape even when single. With a partner, responsibilities get shared. That part is easy. However, what can really suck is being trapped in a relationship- worse still a legal marriage- with someone you realise you cannot get along with anymore. But then, there are solutions. Worse case scenario is a split. You come out of these things wiser and stronger. A clever strategy however is to not get sucked into a relationship- or a committed marriage- with someone you do not get to know beforehand. No one is perfect, however. One good thumb rule can be to figure if you can put up with their ugly side. If you can handle their weaknesses and their 'evils', then you are on a predictable wicket. A year long relationship, in my opinion, is a must before you make a lifelong commitment. Even good actors can slip up and reveal their true selves in that period.
  12. Well, why don't you dump him? A good argument is good fun. Adds to the passion.
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