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In the Name of God بسم الله


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Posts posted by SNaqvi1214

  1. (bismillah)

    [ Shakir 33:33 ] And stay in your houses and do not display your finery like the displaying of the ignorance of yore; and keep up prayer, and pay the poor-rate, and obey Allah and His Messenger. Allah only desires to keep away the uncleanness from you, O people of the House! and to purify you a (thorough) purifying.

    "Allah (sawt) is removing evil deeds and sins ( ArRijs) and is purifying them with a thorough purification"

    [ http://www.shiacrescent.com/2009/07/03/reb...-on-surah-3333/ ]

    I'm not questioning the validity of this, I am asking for an explanation to better my understanding.

    How is it possible to purify that which is already pure?


  2. salam,

    (1) first of all, there is a difference between a wife and a mother. If a man needs a wife to tell him its too cold to be without a coat, i have to feel doubt of his mental capability to have a wife in the first place.

    it takes two people to make a kid; it takes two people to raise a kid. women should not feel sole responsibility for childcare. women should not feel more guilty than men if the child becomes ill. women should not feel that men are clueless when it comes to childcare, bc this only increases their own work load and adds stress to marital and family relations.

    Dont know if this is relevant, but how old was Bibi Fatema when Bibi Khadeja passed away?

    (2) I do not believe in domination (either men over women or women over men), no matter how "well-intentioned." No one should have power over another individual, save our Lord, Master of the universe, and His messengers. I do, however, believe that well-intentioned, caring, loving relationships do exist and are the happiest.

    (3) I do hope your "analogy" (which I think is actually an example) is mutual. If she forgives his harshest and most hurtful deeds, he should do the same. And she should feel as intensely attracted to him and he is to her; he should keep hijab from namehram women as she does from namehram men.

    anyone come up with anything about polygamy?

    Salam! :)

  3. I am so praying an extra long dua for you! You said everything I wanted explained, and reinforced it two fold.

    If looked at realistically, it is hard for women that don't have any problems with their memory during their menses etc to accept views like this that may sound like we are inferior to men...

    I don't think Imam Ali (as) would say something demeaning about women


    I am not saying we dumb, uneducated, slaves to men etc. We are not, Allah SWT gave us a brain and the Prophet (pbuh) has ordained that women should be educated etc but there are times when us women are slightly weak compared to men. We are equal to men but different and this because we are physically, mentally and emotionally different. There is nothing wrong in accepting this at all. Because we are different.

    But we women are all different too, some of us are very girly, some of us are very tom boyish some are somewhere in the middle but we all identify with something in common somewhere along the lines. Same with blokes they are not all the same but somewhere along the lines they too have something in common.

    Islam is a beautiful religion that gives women and men rights, equal but different and that's what we have to remember.

    Women are not inferior to men. If we were we wouldn't have a great role model, a woman of substance, the beloved lady Zainab (sa), if it wasn't for her (sa) we really would be lost, she (sa) fought against all odds, spoke her(sa) mind out in the darbar of the king (la) of that time etc. I mean she (sa) led all the women, a leader in her (sa) own right, so who's saying lady Zainab (sa) is inferior? Who would say it? No-one with a right mind would accuse lady Zainab (sa) for being inferior. So this proves we are not insignifant compared to men.

    Where Allah SWT has given men the right to men to inherit more He's (SWT) given women the right to demand payment for upkeep of household, Allah SWT has said He (SWT) forgives women literally half of her sin's (perhaps more - i can't remember the hadith correctly) during child birth, He SWT tells men who marry will safeguard half of their religion etc. preventing them from further sins etc.

    There are always two sides to a coin, where we might (as women) think we are being persecuted or exploited or demeaned, Islam has safe guarded women to such an extent that I feel at times that us women have more rights than men. The problem is that society has always made women look like she's useless and just there for sexual pleasure.

    But if men start valuing women as prescribed in Islamic law then the picture will start getting better. But we women have a jihad on our hands to stand up for our rights. But if we don't, then yes men will continue to abuse women's rights just like they have done for centuries.

    Just one thing: I believe that all muslims are feminist. Islam and feminism are both against racism, classism, lookism, agism, and of course the all-time sexism. I do not believe we should be equal in each and every given aspect. I do believe that we are of equal worth, that if a woman choses to stay home and if her husband goes out to work everyday, they equally contribute to the household. Capitalism is the driving force that makes money-earners more important, because capitalism is based on monetary flow. I believe a stay at home wife doesnt make $$ but is still equal to her husband.

    whoa, tangent back to relevant context:

    As for the question of polygamy, it's allowed in Islam only if a man can give justice to his wives, if not then only one wife is highly recommended. The need for polygamous marriages happened when more men were dying in wars and women were left unmarried. If it was the other way round (to my knowledge something practiced in south India) how is a woman supposed to know which child belongs to which father? And the psychological/emotional problems that come with that. That's why women are not allowed to have more than one husband at one time! Plus would a woman want to have more than one husband lol!

    Yeah, i'd never even consider having more than one husband.

    but can a man love (truly care for) more than one woman? how can you be in love with mutliple partners?

    why is polygamy still allowed? the battle happened 1400 years ago... the ratio of men to women has just about evened out.

    Oh, yes, I should add one thing:

    Please observe respect when replying. we will come to nothing if our aim is to insult each other and not help each other come to a higher level of iman and understanding. I really do want to learn about women and Islam and it is a bit hard when these threads are closed off.

    Jazakallah khairan!

    -SN- :D

  4. Salaam,

    First of all, I’m sorry if I offended one. I'm just trying to seek truth and justice. If you guys want to PM me, please dont send profanity.

    Thank you to all who replied. I'll take it one by one:

    Imran Ali: I tried to speak to a mulana, as I said in my first post.

    Yousif: (your first post) I read that exact explanation, but thought is insufficient for my own understanding because (1) Women are good at more than just child rearing and house keeping; (2) It doesn’t explain WHY women are given less inheritance or witness-ship; (3) Imam Ali is just ('adil), why would he implicate ALL women for something an individual did? I've never heard of the defects of men because of something a male did.

    (Your 2nd post) ok, so men shouldn’t please women.... but it is a woman's duty to please her man (i.e. husband.) Doesn’t seem very fair, even mutual, to me.

    And also: if you are a man and your mother doesn’t want you to do mustahab fasts, pray excessively, etc., for concern for your health, isn’t it makrooh for you to disobey her? Is that not listening to a woman?

    (your 3rd post): I do not speak arabic and so have no idea what those ayats meant. Can you post the citations?

    Iran warrior, Yousif, and Ali Imran: Those ayats that Allah puts forth imply "disbelieving wo/men" etc. It never targets something that all wo/men or even most wo/men do. Yet mostly all women DO menstruate, and therefore it seems that the khutba targets most women.

    skOOn: me too. :)

    Mohsin: I heard something along the lines of "anything led by a women is doomed..." narrated by Abu Hurraira, and so as you can imagine I never gave it significance.

    Cresentknitter: 1st post-- :P 2nd post-- Thank you!!! you can think aloud as much as you want, bc i do it too.

    Aliya: (first post) It is claimed that Bibi Fatema s.a. was free from "impurity" so she did not have "deficient faith" as the rest of us girls do.

    As for Heaven lying at a mother's feet:

    (1) Not all mothers are good mothers, should heaven be at their feet as well? Be specific--generalities are harmful more than helpful

    (2) Not all women are physically capable of being mothers. Are women that are not mothers not as important?

    (3) I’ve always felt this was a way for men to shirk their paternal duties...

    (second post) yes because almost all women menstruate.

    Maryam-- Nice article. who's the author? just one thing-- Physiological difference was not mentioned in the khutba, Intelligence was.

    Also, what if a woman doesn’t marry? her husband cannot pay for her then!

    TheTruth: maybe I'm not as "hard-core" as I should be. I'm told time and again to stop questioning and start following blindly, but that is not the way I want to follow faith. after all, to believe you must have a SLIGHT understanding. Oh, and I already said it was about 'ayesha.

    Anonymous: I dont frequent this site much. pray tell, where are those threads? and did you all ever come to some conclusion?

    Nevermind: scorpions? :huh:

    Diva: YOU’RE MY HERO! :) and I am a feminist... love to see the facial reaction people (esp. men) have when I tell 'em.

    I never once heard any one question the authority of the Nahjal Balagha.... can it be?

    Oh, and don’t get carried away w/ making generalizations about men bc then there would be no difference between us and, well, misogynists. i.e. women are not more intelligent than men, (nor LESS!) but I believe we are of equal rank... created equally.


    Another question: why are men permitted polygamy?

    Jazak Allah khairan everyone!


  5. Salam all,

    quote from Nahjul Balagha, 79th sermon:

    "O' ye peoples! Women are deficient in Faith, deficient in shares, and deficient in intelligence. As regards the deficiency in their faith, it is the abstention from prayers and fasting during their menstrual period. As regards deficiency in their intelligence it is becuase the evidence of two women is equal to that of one man. As for the deficiency of their shares that is becuase of their share in inheritance being half of men. So beware of evils of women. Be on your gaurd even from those of them who are (reportedly) good. Do not obey them even in good things so that they may attract you to evils."

    As a woman, I think it is a bit obvious why I feel... hurt by this. I asked a mulana about this, (who became extremely uncomfortable) and said that I "should not worry about this khutba, that it was just targeted at Ayesha."

    If that is the case, then why would the Imam call ALL women defective, and not just Ayesha?

    Also, there is another sermon that he calls on Ayesha by name (sermon 155)--not literally, but rather as "that woman". Why couldnt he just do the same for the above one as well?

    In yet another sermon,

    "Beasts are concerned with their bellies. Carnivores are concerned with assaulting others. Women are concerned with the adnornments of this ignoble life and the creation of mischief herein. On the otherhand, believers are humble, believers are admonishers and believers are afraid of Allah."

    I dont mean to sound whiny, but why are women included in "the believers"?!?!

    Perhaps I should ask what I want to know:

    Can anyone explain Imam Ali's 79th sermon, (the first in this post) ?? and while we're at it, how can we claim Islam is based on equality while we allow men to be polygomous, men to inherit more, and men to count more (in terms of giving witness) ?

    Why do Islamic texts reflect the Christian theme of "Evil Eve"? (i.e. not that Eve was in fact evil, but that women brought the downfall on men.)

    I have always been a "hardcore shia" and have respected Imam Ali a.s. all my life; reading these sermons made me feel... well... :cry:


  6. Salam all,

    I'm not all too familiar with Khomeini's views on women. After the revolution, what were the positive effects that came for muslim women?

    I feel so immature for asking instead of looking it up myself but my computer is acting spasmodically and randomly crashes and I'm on a time constraint. I tired search engines, which only turn up articles about how women were treated like African Americans during the Jim Crow law days. (i.e. segreagated bus seating.)

    I have to explain to a feminist philosopher that Khomeini does respect women

    (using facts) before she publishes something less respectful for the grand Ayatullah. See, she is reading and critiqingthe book Reading Lolita in Tehran.

    Although I've tried to tell her, and have been successful getting through to her, that the author's view is only one side of the story, that she would need to see the other perspectives of the situation. Her opinion of Ayatullah Khomeini, however, wont budge.

    Thank you


  7. why do you call our beloved Holy Prophet Mohammad  (pbuh) by his first name even if your not a muslim still you should respect this great beloved personality, at leat say Prophet Mohammad or the Muslim Prophet. that would be appriciated. will give you an example; lets say i have a friend and i meet his father and i say hello John instead of Mr. John. is this showing respect to an elder person? a decent person wouldnt even call a normal human being who he doesnt know yet or his younger then that person like this let alone refering to a person considered as prophet by Muslims.


    unfortunately, chivalry died long ago...

  8. (bismillah)

    "A woman was filming her father in a shrine of a sister of Hazrat Abbas Alamdar (as), Hazrat Khadija bint Ali (as) in the city of Kufa, Iraq. At once a holy figure, probably Hazrat Abbas bin Ali bin Abi Talib (as), appeared at the door of the holy Zareeh. The woman was overwhelmed by the appearance of the holy figure, she fell to the ground and the camera did too."

    Click here to view


    can it be?


  9. Salamz SNaqvi1214 !

    Actually it`s not a skin problem,but infact an inner one.so we should be looking for the cures regarding ur physical health. perhaps the food u r taking in is not aiding ur inner system.that means ur dijestive system is not working properly.ur less weight is an indication in this regard.there re` some advices by my side,i,e

    Allah Hafiz.

    Do light exercises twice a day(after fajar n in the evening before dinner) for atleast 15-30 minutes.jump on ur toes+rotate ur neck+rotate ur back+try to touch the ground with ur fingers with ur knees straight, etc.jog a bit if u ve`got space at ur home.


    this might be the key, i use to exercise like crazy but i got lazy during the summer b/c i had school work, a job, research, volunteering, family flying in from different countries, friends' life crisises, etc. etc. I really should start again, but its hard run or even walk while fasting...

    Make water-drinking an habbit n try to drink atleast 10 glasses of water daily even if u don`t feel the thirst.

    Avoid over-eating, just keep ur belly short of full.Take 3-5 dates n chew them with a glass of milk once a day after the exercise.

    Avoid taking things with too much of oil in them.

    i already drink water like crazy, infact i probably drink ten glasses before noon. i eat small meals but i eat often. (my sis tells me i never leave the kitchen table... :huh: ) i love dates with warm milk and honey (dunno just a thing i picked up) and i absolutely hate oil.

    so i guess i just need to exercize... how do you exercize while fasting? and i'm afraid of getting too thin... darn circles!

    oh btw, what sect are you from? i read the little note under your avator....?

    sis ummali:

    floradix? i'll ask my doc, i'm sure he'll agree. is it otc or prescribtion?



  10. This testimony is viewed negatively in the eyes of many veterans, because they feel that it didn't help the morale of the soldier who were still in Vietnam.

    nice cover up.... they just were upset that their actions were made public and instead of being praised by the american people they were scorned...

    if this is a true democracy the people should know what the behavior is of the soldiers defending them, it shouldnt be a secret. we have the right to know!!

  11. Salam,

    sis UmmAli,

    hmm i dont think its vitamin C, i love oranges and all other types of fruit (except yellow apples, but anyway) i think it may be the iron then. the problem is, i dont know how to take in more of it. my mom (like all desi mothers) says red meats the best source, but i hate meat, and chicken's ok, but still i prefer vegies. which vegetables are high in iron (which taste good in a sandwhich)? please dont recomend zucchini!

    sis Umm Zaynalabadin,

    anemics have a lower iron level than most people (like me.) but i dont understand why getting a tan would cover your circles... may you just get too pale?


  12. haha unique beauty? sis you can accept it as a feature, but not a beautiful one!

    and anyway what type of deficiencies could it be? i do also have low iron in my blood... but for all i know that wouldnt cause dark circles. i recently got blood work done (not for the circles, but still) it didnt show any deficiencies.

    what else could cause these?

  13. salam sisters,

    well havent been here for a long time, and i see many new members. welcome!

    maybe someone can help here, see i've got these stupid circles around my eyes that wont go away. :(

    i sleep 8 hours a night (if not more) and i eat plenty, although i'm slightly underweight, but that shouldnt do anything. i cant remember when i got these darn things but i know i havent always had them

    please! some help!


    snaqvi :P

  14. it appears to be stained, like i can see the tiny lines of my hands and my fingerprints.

    it interesting you say my skin is reacting to it, becuase i never had a reaction to mehndi before.

    but my skin is supersensative, like last week i used a pinch of bath & body work's sweat pea (i love that scent!) and my hands first got really itchy, then i had small bumps all over my skin, which turned into tiny cuts. it burned even if i put on sensative-skin-formulated lotion.

    but back to this henna....

  15. (salam)


    does anyone know how to identify chemical henna? my aunt is visiting from pakistan and brought me some mehndi, which i happily applied taking for granted that it was natural mehndi- made of herbs. but recently i'm noticing that my skin seems to be peeling a bit and now i dont think the henna was natural... the dark peel gives way to orange-brown colored skin, what one would expect when the henna began to fade... :unsure:

    please someone help, i heard you cant do wudhu with chemical henna applied, and if i cant do wudhu that means my salaat isnt accepted.


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