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Showing content with the highest reputation on 03/19/2018 in all areas

  1. 7 points
    hasanhh

    At Loss

    "You only really "fail" on the Last Day". Several years ago a girl l know, then in high school, was subverted and battered by her father --more than her other sisters. Then she went to college yet lived at home for obvious reasons. Situation continued. lt got so bad that my wife gave her a key to our house so she had some place to go. Once she came-in at 2 in the morning --limping. l told her then that she is "a smart girl and a tough girl". She is now finishing with med school.
  2. 4 points
    Heavenly_Silk

    Thoughts 2018

    Mubarak to all momineen on the wiladat of Imam Baqir (a.s).
  3. 3 points
    Hello everyone, I am a male, and as the title suggests, i am looking for the advice in terms of same-sex attractions. I know its kind of a taboo and controversial subject, but i believe that just to hide the stuff under the carpet wont solve any issue, and the true religion of Ahl-ul-Bait (AS) has the solution for everything. I won't go towards why I am having this challenge - as i never chose it or wanted it in my life - and after so much reading and research, i simply consider it as the test/exam of Allah for me - and yes it is very hard exam. But i am trying to be steadfast and be on His path as i don't 'act' on these same-sex attractions, and i totally avoid any kind of temptation like porn, chats, etc. I pray regularly, fast, pay Khums and Zakat, and inshAllah going to Hajj this year. My specific questions are as follows: 1) My first marriage got ended as ex-wife - being raised in West - believed that same-sex attractions are permanent, and I should be living a life with a man instead of woman 2) As i believed in the true religion of Ahl-ul-Bait (AS), i want to do second marriage now, but the constraint is who would be ready and accepting to marry a man with same-sex attractions? 3) How can i find a woman/life partner who understand my situation and willing to help me to be on Allah's path and lead a good life? 4) If marriage with a woman is not an option for me, or if no woman is ready to help me, then what is the solution for me? The whole life of celibacy? Thanks.
  4. 3 points
    ali_fatheroforphans

    At Loss

    I'm sorry to hear about your situation. Your mother is clearly not treating you right. However try to understand that a lot of mothers are like that - they just don't understand the implications of their harsh and painful words. They often feel that they should do anything and everything without some sort of filter. Although I never have fights with my mum, she does often scold and abuse my little sister for not praying and dressing the way she wants her to dress. However, realize that no mother genuinely hates her child. She might have a very wrong way of getting her point across but she is your mother after all. I'm sure she wants you to be happy and do that which pleases her. Try not to build hatred for your mum in your heart (I know it might be very hard given what you experienced), but forgive her. Talk to her kindly, increase the number of hugs you give her (my sister's technique works lol), make her breakfast, kiss her etc. And don't be like, I'm just gonna try to live on my own, and "bye bye mum" - this is the wrong attitude to have in my opinion. You need to just talk to your mother and share everything. She will miss you when you live by yourself and she'll feel lonely. Therefore try to be super kind to her while you're with her and inshallah everything will be alright. Realize this is a test from Allah.
  5. 3 points
    Islandsandmirrors

    At Loss

    I’m going to text a class mate and ask if she can take pics of them for me. I would ask the teacher for an extra copy, but the midterm itself is on the next class so there’s no time left. Pray for me that the student I’ll contact will answer.
  6. 3 points
    Hameedeh

    Be Prepared

    It's always good to be prepared, however, I live in a Hurricane Zone. If I have to evacuate, walking on foot, I won't be able to carry all that stuff in the kit. I need to only carry what I absolutely need to survive. After thinking about the basics (purse, wallet, medication, passport) I get stuck and don't want to think about it.
  7. 3 points
    I understand your struggle, and inshallah your post will help others who are going through this test. 1. Same-sex attraction doesn’t mean that you should be with a man rather than woman. It’s just a test. Sometimes, the attraction can change with intensity or decrease, but it might always be there. It might not. Allah tests all of us in different ways. If she left you only because of your attraction to men, well, she did something terrible. And for the record, I was born and raised in the west and I don’t believe Same-sex attraction will always be there to full intensity. 2. As a person who has been curious about the same sex, but has never acted on that curiousity, I would say to find someone who is open minded, and someone who is willing to accept you. Explain to the future wife to be about your struggles and your commitment to the Ahlul Bayt (AS) and inshallah the right woman will admire your struggles to obey Allah in face of such a difficult test. It’s actually a great way of weeding out people who are narrow minded and unsuitable matches. If they don’t wish to continue after you tell them, consider it a red flag and a blessing that they have shown their true colors. If any woman rejects you based on that alone, consider it a bullet dodged. 3. The key is to find someone who is open minded and willing to accept you. Find someone whom you are compatible with, someone who has good akhlaq. 4. You might think that woman may not accept you based on a few proposals. But don’t give-up. Keep looking for a spouse and inshallah the right person will appear. Celibacy is not needed.
  8. 3 points
    Salam Sis, That’s a tough one. Sometimes it’s best to keep your distance from your family and take care of your own emotional needs—journal your feelings, do some yoga, meditate, breathe. Focus on your breathing. Take walks to make yourself feel centered. Inshallah what I’ve said can be of some benefit to you, Sis. You’re not alone. We are all here for you.
  9. 3 points
    This famous atheist philosopher of the 20th century had an incredible experience of God. Instead of welcoming it with awe, wonder and joy, he reacted with indignation and rage and blasphemy. It's really sad. It reminded of another famous atheist philosopher Thomas Nagel writing that he doesnt want there to be a God, and hopes there isnt.
  10. 3 points
    IbnSina

    Thoughts 2018

    Does anyone know of any UK based english talking hajj caravan that they can recommend?
  11. 3 points
    Sirius_Bright

    Choosing a Maraja!

    Salaam brother, Imame Zamana (atfs) is present and in occultation. During this time, marajas are only his representative and not replacement. A fallible cannot replace infallible.
  12. 3 points
    Hameedeh

    Choosing a Maraja!

    Salam. Most Shias believe in taqleed, which is following a Marja. This is a post about it by the Development Team: http://www.shiachat.com/forum/topic/235042512-important-questions-answered/?do=findComment&comment=2968583 Why Taqleed? The Importance Of Ijtihad And Taqlid Grand Ayatullahs
  13. 2 points
    For those people who say they won't raise children in the West, don't you have all those objectionable things (alcohol, night clubs, online porn, etc.) in your own country? Teaching your children right from wrong (halal vs haram) is wajib for you, no matter where you live.
  14. 2 points
    "I wanted to teach the nation how to give" -Abdul Sittar Edhi
  15. 2 points
    Islandsandmirrors

    At Loss

    Verbal abuse is so hard and I’m so sorry to hear about your friend. It must have been such a heartbreaking time for her. She’s a very strong person. I hope to become strong like that one day.
  16. 2 points
  17. 2 points
    I had a good sleep, rest over last weekend, and today all set for Monday. Thanks to Almighty for everything. Happy to reach work before time, as since few months the traffic been horrible and changing the route since alst week to work has helped me to be on the time that i wanted to be at. I can't stand lazy drivers on road. I hate people when they drive on 40kmph/hr when its 60-70 zone.
  18. 2 points
    Intellectual Resistance

    Thoughts 2018

    Watch Black Panther. I would even argue you ought to watch Thor Ragnorak, previous Marvel Movies, and Guardians of the Galaxy 1 and 2 (as i will do so).
  19. 2 points
    Reza

    #30 Knowledge or Money?

    Exactly. Money can help entire communities for generations (including the advancement of knowledge). Although there are some very knowledgeable personalities in the Islamic world, the critical juncture has been the dissemination of that knowledge to the world at large (translated books, training speakers, online materials, etc). That takes money. Imagine if somebody with 20 million dollars had this as a priority.
  20. 2 points
    Griffindor

    The path

    The smell of death with every breath It grows, don't fear But shed a tear, of love Cry for the time you , betayed But He loved you so much And forgave, again and again Cry for the pain Of numerous falls But he helped you And took you back Into the fold You stood at the precipe Ready to fall The devil came to push you But he gave you his Hand The devil stalled He saved your soul Cry it's good, for your heart That He gave from Him He told - O dear man I let you roam So that you may find my Path It's round every corner I gave you a light and a rope I gave you senses To guide you To the path of light All else is darkness and nothingness The path It reveals for those Who open their eyes And accept My Love
  21. 2 points
    Ashvazdanghe

    Choosing a Maraja!

    Salam all of us know it ,he is just representative of him until reappearance.
  22. 2 points
    notme

    Thoughts 2018

    Congratulations! It'll be great to not have it hanging over you anymore.
  23. 2 points
    Heavenly_Silk

    Thoughts 2018

    Really happy for you sis, congrats! Most important question, have you started shopping yet?
  24. 2 points
    Islandsandmirrors

    Thoughts 2018

    I might be married sooner than I thought. It feels unreal.
  25. 2 points
    notme

    Be Prepared

    Very good and helpful post. Thank you. But I didn't say or imply "most people". Certainly some people. Not everyone can afford a cable bill. I have a Mormon friend who told me it's part of their religion to be prepared for disasters. On her advice, I had started stockpiling canned foods. When I was laid off from my job, this supply of beans and tomato soup was most of what my family ate until I managed to work out an arrangement with the mortgage company to accept a lower payment until I found employment. Keeping extras of non-perishable essential items is helpful in man-made crisis situations too. It's good advice to prepare. But we also need to help those in need, whether by their fault or their misfortune.
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