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In the Name of God بسم الله
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Entries in this blog

parents - the good and the bad

Sometimes we forget to be grateful for many of the blessings God has decreed upon us that if we were to thank him for countless days and nights, it would never be sufficient. Some of us may not realise that despite living in a house where our parents have different mindsets that complicate many aspects in life, perhaps during their time they had it far more worse. We forget that they have gone through immense pressure trying to give us a life far more opportunistic than theirs, yet they fail to

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

sensitivity

The correlation between OCD and being sensitive may apply only to some people. There is no clear evidence that highly sensitive individuals are prone to the disorder, although one of the symptoms indicate sensitivity to be a major factor. For instance, one may begin to obsess over hygiene as they fear being contaminated or infected with bacteria at home, so they start washing their hands repeatedly or attempting to maintain the cleanliness of the house. They are sensitive to any foreign substanc

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

guilt

I came across a tragic story of a young man who committed suicide as he convinced himself that he was not a true servant of God. He was well known for his piety and devotion in religious obligations. But such dark whispers led him to believe that Allah was still displeased with him. Whether or not he knew that suicide is a grave sin, perhaps he thought that he would never reach God's satisfaction either way.  I was baffled and lost with words. Someone who had such high faith and yet found i

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

Scrupulosity

When we think of the term Obsessive Compulsive Disorder, certain thoughts may enter our mind such as the need to maintain hygiene or the need to constantly check, fear of contamination or hurting others. It is much more than that. It also primarily deals with the 'obsession' of thoughts, as I'd like to call it. Being inclined to unwanted thoughts, such as sexual or religious ones and the more you try to push it away, the worse it gets. It is like someone telling you to continue thinking this way

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

OCD - an Islamic insight

You're awake at night, in a deep dark suspense. Not a pindrop of sound. You face upwards towards the ceiling, trying to think about God, but everytime you do, the devil makes his way into your head. You feel frustrated, anxious, and devastated; wondering how can you stop him from getting inside your thoughts. How do you continue to keep that connection with your Lord without him trying to distance yourself from faith?  For nearly five years, I suffered from a common condition as to what we

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

the chosen one

In a time of ignorance A period of injustice and profanity  Where it was filled with insanity  Hearts were filled with vanity   He sent a true messenger  To fulfill a mission that would change humanity To forbid atrocity and spread morality To guide His creatures towards the true message To remove the calamities and wreckage   The hypocrites wouldn't stop mocking him Calling him names and throwing dirt He let them do so freely, for

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

can’t I grow a little more confidence

Am I not allowed to grow a little confidence? To get past my self consciousness?   Why youse gotta restrict me  From getting rid of my insecurity Youse will never understand why I keep disobeying Youse may think I'm selfish, but I keep praying  Hoping for a miracle to pass by and change your minds   I know that it's for my protection  But I'm old enough to depend on my own Everyday I keep staring at my reflection  Wondering when youse w

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

society is a criminal

I'm only pretty if I have enough likes I'm not so pretty if I only have five    I'm only popular if I have many friends  I'm only special if I start to follow these trends   I only get noticed with makeup Without it I'm no longer recognised   You need that flat stomach and those fine curves  So you choose to put yourself  through that pain you don't deserve Starving yourself till your rib cages begin to show You want to be like the rest

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

Please let me help you

Please let me help you  Let me help you get this through  We share the same blood And I want you to be loved   Look I know that you're depressed And I know that you're in distress   But I wish you could open up Instead of always shutting up You choose to conceal yourself  And I still don't know why  sometimes I hate myself  For even having to try  To make you fess up    I know you don't want my help  Maybe I do

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

You say I’ll be okay but you’re still not

When I'm in pain you say it won't last But I see you still paining about the past   When I'm in tears you tell me to keep smiling But I still see you curled up in the corner crying   You tell everyone it'll be alright  But the space around you is tight    You tell everyone you're fine But I already know that's a lie   It's never that easy to let go  That strong feeling of betrayal But one day they'll know  Just how much t

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

its not a curse

You say it was a curse 'Cause I became worse You say I am being punished 'Cause I caused my old self to be diminished You say I am beginning to deteriorate As time passes by I don't know how much longer I can wait As I sit there and cry Staring at the blank wall Hoping for a miracle You say it was a curse But I believe it was a test You say I became worse But I am trying my best To return to where I was.

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

shes been throug hell

She's been through hell But everytime she fell She got back up and praised the Lord For she made it through that narrow ford Instead of sleeping She kept on weeping Instead of dreaming She kept on thinking Too many thoughts right now That's keeping her up tonight She can't seem to break this fight A fight of clashing thoughts She got caught in an accident Yet she still thanked Him 'Cause she knew that not everyone's lucky He chose to put her through a calam

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

couldnt control it

I  would give way to the guilt That let those trapped thoughts and emotions get built Awake all night, contemplating whether I was a bad person And this only made my condition worsen Couldn't tell anyone what I was going through And even if I did, I felt like there was nothing they could do Compulsive and uncontrollable It felt so unavoidable Trapped inside my own hole, not willing to escape Something just kept pulling me back, Why couldn't I control it, was it

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

she fell from heaven and went back

A delicate young flower With great spiritual power A soul that descended from heaven And took some of its pure fragrance She brightened the whole city with her illuminance Her modesty and piety shone through its radiance She was indeed the greatest of the four  And God was the only one she spent time for Consistent in her prayers and faith  No woman could ever beat her status Without her existence there would've been no pure progeny To carry her father's word to

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

the backbone of Islam

He was Islam's backbone His wisdom and bravery was widely known None of them could beat his intelligence And for that they called him the peak of eloquence It was his powerful words that continued to guide mankind To be fair, honest, loving and kind He stood by his cousin's side like a shield  Everytime they had a mission And had to face opposition  It was he who gained them victory In the greatest battles of history The first man to submit his will to God The fi

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

mood swings

Some days feel low and some days feel high some days I find joy and some days I just cry its a mixture of heightened emotions that I can’t even describe some days feel tough and some days feel like a breeze some days I find comfort and some days I can’t find ease its a mixture of heightened emotions I can’t even describe   lost and trapped in this loophole don’t know when I'll get it under control

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

changes

Thought I was never going to change Now thinking about it just feels strange 'Cause I never used to see it coming I saw myself changing and chose to ignore it It was for the good but mostly for the bad Even after I realised, I was neither happy nor sad I became nicer but less faithful  Maybe I should've been more careful The things I told myself I was never going to do  Now I do them like it's not so bad I know I didn't completely change to the worst  But I know my le

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

overthinking

Overthinking is everybody's greatest weakness Did I say or do something wrong? What does that person think of me? Does he/she hate me? Is it really my fault ? Did I make a good or bad impression? Was I exaggerating? Was I being a hypocrite? Maybe I shouldn't have said that I shouldn't have made that person think of me that way Why does he/she hate me? I know that it was my fault I know I made a bad impression I know I was over exaggerating  I know I was being a

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

silent pain

Such hard things in life that you can't even cope  But with God by your side, you can't just lose hope All that pain keeping you up tonight  You just gotta keep reminding yourself that it's alright For that silent growing pain is only temporary. Strengthening our faith and pushing away the guilt that wasn't even necessary.

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

restricted

No doubt I know youse love me And all these restrictions are there to protect me But for how long does it have to be this way How long do I have to pretend that I'm okay You try hard to guilt trip me Even though I didn't completely change to the worst You'd still assume that I lost all my faith Yet little do you know I pray for you almost everyday Sometimes I think I'm a little too selfish To be thinking this way, some are too unfortunate Instead of complaining I should

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

Don't give up just yet.

Why am I always agitated To the point where I'm just irritated At every small thing that comes my way I throw a tantrum not realising what I say Sometimes I reassure myself It's okay, your human, you can control yourself But everytime I try, its only temporary And I try to push away the guilt that I carry No matter how many times you fall Keep breaking through that strong immense wall Even if you still haven't been able to and you just wanna stop

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

There will be ease

Don't you ever wish that you could rewind And remove all those bad memories that were left behind But then God tells us to learn and move forward Thinking about the past will just make us fall downwards He has promised twice that there would be ease  So make a difference and just let those thoughts cease Later in life they'll be deep regret For all that wasted time you could never get You could've spent that precious time valuably  But instead you dec

3wliya_maryam

3wliya_maryam

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