You can never stop loving someone. No matter how much you try, you can still let go of that person and through time you won’t feel the same way towards her but you will still feel something for her because how much she meant to you.  Let yourself get hurt for it’s a learning experience and that pain is only temporary. but I can’t imagine how hard it must have been for you, to the point where you almost killed your self. I never thought that love can actually take you to that extent. May Allah make it easy for you brother.  

No, she said "Plz leave me", everything is finished now... 

Thoughts? 

https://www.alhannah.com/product/iranian-style-prayer-chador-ps390/   There are a lot of them online. Arabic style is also good. It covers whole body and is more like a loose Abaya. Heres one:   https://www.amazon.com/Cogongrass-One-piece-Garment-Jellaba-Clothing/dp/B073NXGSJW/ref=mp_s_a_1_2?crid=3FHYRNFC1ZM0M&keywords=chador&qid=1556169547&s=gateway&sprefix=chador&sr=8-2   May Allah keep you with Hazrat Zahra. I liked your question

But I had no control over falling in love with her, I had to go to Pakistan recently and that was where my feelings really developed...  I wish I had never fallen in love with her, I destroyed myself by putting her above me, Now I'm all alone with no one to blame but me. I'll never love again.