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Will my father's sins affect me in this world?

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:bismillah:

:salam:

Hope everyone is well.

It's been a while, since I came to know something devastating and it has been bothering me, because I think it has affected my life negatively.

Here's a little bit of backstory:

I found out that it is highly likely that my father brought haram earnings into our house. Hence, that means throughout my teenage life and early 20s, I was having haram food and possibly spending money from which khums was not paid. I currently live in a house which my father bought a few years ago and I spend from money obtained from selling our property, which I think is haram and khums is not paid from them, both the house and money. Now, I am unemployed and I'm trying my hardest to find a job to earn halal rizq, but it's very competitive and I have no choice, but to spend from possibly haram money. 

My father is separated from us, because he married a vulgar woman, living in his mansion and traveling the world, while he doesn't care what we are going through.

Now, the question is how does this work? I had no involvement in what my father did, because I was too young to understand. What about the house we are living in? Is Allahسُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى going to hold me responsible as well and will this affect me this world? I believe it has, because of all the problems I have in my life, it could be a result of this.

As a I said, I have no job. I'm searching, but I get rejected everywhere I apply. This is maddening. All these years, I thought my father was a noble man, but no he was the opposite, he was just pretending... Or maybe Shaytan got to him at some point.

Please, I need your input.

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Each person is only accountable for his own sins, not the sins of others, so no, you aren't responsible for the source of your father's past income. However, if it makes you uncomfortable, as soon as you are self sufficient, donate as much of the possibly illicit money to charity as you are able. 

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15 minutes ago, notme said:

Each person is only accountable for his own sins, not the sins of others, so no, you aren't responsible for the source of your father's past income. However, if it makes you uncomfortable, as soon as you are self sufficient, donate as much of the possibly illicit money to charity as you are able. 

Yeah, your right. Allahسُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى is merciful. It's just sometimes, I just feel uneasy when I think too much about it and yes, charity is a good idea. InshAllah, I pray I become self sufficient soon.

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How's your relationship with your father? I heard that for some sins, you get punished in this world. One of those sins is if your father is angry with you. I have seen it happening too many times, evil sinful people are living successful and easy lives just because their fathers are happy with them. While good people suffer if their fathers are angry with them. So yeah, if your father doesn't like you even for the most ridiculous reason, your life is screwed even if he is not a pious person. 

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4 hours ago, rkazmi33 said:

How's your relationship with your father? I heard that for some sins, you get punished in this world. One of those sins is if your father is angry with you. I have seen it happening too many times, evil sinful people are living successful and easy lives just because their fathers are happy with them. While good people suffer if their fathers are angry with them. So yeah, if your father doesn't like you even for the most ridiculous reason, your life is screwed even if he is not a pious person. 

I'm not sure, if that's the case. Well, my relationship with my father is not bad. I do have contact with him, we text each other occasionally. I visited him a few times, even after he married another woman and hurt my mother emotionally. 

Sure, I'm not perfect, my father and I had some small arguments in the past, but not something that he could become angry with me forever.

Edited by The Light

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On 3/20/2018 at 7:17 AM, notme said:

Each person is only accountable for his own sins, not the sins of others, so no, you aren't responsible for the source of your father's past income. However, if it makes you uncomfortable, as soon as you are self sufficient, donate as much of the possibly illicit money to charity as you are able. 

this make sense, but unfortunately i have heard other stories where the sin has been carried over to the child. But it might just be unlucky couple.

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1 hour ago, bigboi said:

this make sense, but unfortunately i have heard other stories where the sin has been carried over to the child. But it might just be unlucky couple.

Sins don't transfer, but unfortunately sometimes consequences do. For example the child who is abused is more likely than others to grow up to be an abuser, unless he/she is able to learn correct human interaction. Babies are born drug addicted or brain damaged. People lose their jobs due to lies told by a colleague or bad financial decisions by the boss. Other people's actions can affect us, definitely, but their sins are theirs alone. 

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6 minutes ago, notme said:

Sins don't transfer, but unfortunately sometimes consequences do. For example the child who is abused is more likely than others to grow up to be an abuser, unless he/she is able to learn correct human interaction. Babies are born drug addicted or brain damaged. People lose their jobs due to lies told by a colleague or bad financial decisions by the boss. Other people's actions can affect us, definitely, but their sins are theirs alone. 

true!

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On 3/20/2018 at 11:17 AM, notme said:

Each person is only accountable for his own sins, not the sins of others, so no, you aren't responsible for the source of your father's past income. However, if it makes you uncomfortable, as soon as you are self sufficient, donate as much of the possibly illicit money to charity as you are able. 

The soul who sins shall die. The son shall not suffer for the iniquity of the father, nor the father suffer for the iniquity of the son. The righteousness of the righteous shall be upon himself, and the wickedness of the wicked shall be upon himself.  (Ezekiel 18:20, ESV)

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Salam this is may be what called متقدم وماتاخر

مآ تقدم is deeds person send before his/her die which only related to him/her 

ماتاخر is what remain from anybody & until that this deed or construction  is availabel has effect on dead person & other pepole like writing a book or construction of building if it has profit for people increase ماتقدم good deeds & opposite of this 

If you think that money which used for buying this house is mix of Halal & Haram if you can use a part of house for helping people specially some religious work such as Azadari or shia educational activitis until it is dedicated to it it reduce haram effect & will increase Halal effect.

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On 3/20/2018 at 6:38 AM, The Light said:

:bismillah:

:salam:

Hope everyone is well.

It's been a while, since I came to know something devastating and it has been bothering me, because I think it has affected my life negatively.

Here's a little bit of backstory:

I found out that it is highly likely that my father brought haram earnings into our house. Hence, that means throughout my teenage life and early 20s, I was having haram food and possibly spending money from which khums was not paid. I currently live in a house which my father bought a few years ago and I spend from money obtained from selling our property, which I think is haram and khums is not paid from them, both the house and money. Now, I am unemployed and I'm trying my hardest to find a job to earn halal rizq, but it's very competitive and I have no choice, but to spend from possibly haram money. 

My father is separated from us, because he married a vulgar woman, living in his mansion and traveling the world, while he doesn't care what we are going through.

Now, the question is how does this work? I had no involvement in what my father did, because I was too young to understand. What about the house we are living in? Is Allahسُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى going to hold me responsible as well and will this affect me this world? I believe it has, because of all the problems I have in my life, it could be a result of this.

As a I said, I have no job. I'm searching, but I get rejected everywhere I apply. This is maddening. All these years, I thought my father was a noble man, but no he was the opposite, he was just pretending... Or maybe Shaytan got to him at some point.

Please, I need your input.

You do not get his sins, supposing the money is haram money. At the same time, if you are reasonably sure that this is haram money, and now that you are old enough to realize what the situation is, you should not take anything from your father except what you need to survive(i.e. food, clothing, shelter) until you can earn your own money, and you should try to do that as soon as possible. It seems that you are trying to do that, so I think you are ok based on what you said. 

As far as the problem you have in your life, everyone has problems in their life. Whether they are good or bad, rich or poor, earn money from halal or earn money from haram. The world is not a place where people do not have problems. There are two differences between people which may lead you to believe that there are people that don't have problems. 

1) As someone trying to be a mumin, it is not encouraged to openly complain about your problems to anyone but Allah(s.w.a). If you think someone can help you, you should ask them for help but without complaining or being ungrateful. If they help you, you should thank them and thank Allah(s.w.a) for helping you thru them. If they don't help you (and they have the capacity to help), you should still thank Allah(s.w.a) and ask him to give you Sabr. So there are some people who you think have no problems when actually they have alot. 

2) If you are grateful to Allah(s.w.a) for what he has given you, whether it is a little or alot, He(s.w.a) will increase it for you. He will either give you actual things (money, property, etc) or He(s.w.a) will give you the Sabr to endure not having lots of material things. Either way, He(s.w.a) will give you. If you have Sabr, then things that seem like huge problems to other people will not seem like huge problems to you. Allah(s.w.a) will make these small in your eyes, so you will not act as if you have alot of problems, even if other people think that you do.   

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I think I should add to make things more clear and I should've said it first (my bad), is that I understand that sins don't transfer from father to son or vice versa, but the key thing I am concerned about is the worldly consequences of a father's sin on his family. Because, I heard many times that if a father persists on sinning, then something might happen to that father's offspring as a form of punishment. Additionally, I've also heard that sustaining yourself through haram food, has negative effects on the soul, and because of that duas might not get answered.

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2 hours ago, Abu Hadi said:

You do not get his sins, supposing the money is haram money. At the same time, if you are reasonably sure that this is haram money, and now that you are old enough to realize what the situation is, you should not take anything from your father except what you need to survive(i.e. food, clothing, shelter) until you can earn your own money, and you should try to do that as soon as possible. It seems that you are trying to do that, so I think you are ok based on what you said. 

As far as the problem you have in your life, everyone has problems in their life. Whether they are good or bad, rich or poor, earn money from halal or earn money from haram. The world is not a place where people do not have problems. There are two differences between people which may lead you to believe that there are people that don't have problems. 

1) As someone trying to be a mumin, it is not encouraged to openly complain about your problems to anyone but Allah(s.w.a). If you think someone can help you, you should ask them for help but without complaining or being ungrateful. If they help you, you should thank them and thank Allah(s.w.a) for helping you thru them. If they don't help you (and they have the capacity to help), you should still thank Allah(s.w.a) and ask him to give you Sabr. So there are some people who you think have no problems when actually they have alot. 

2) If you are grateful to Allah(s.w.a) for what he has given you, whether it is a little or alot, He(s.w.a) will increase it for you. He will either give you actual things (money, property, etc) or He(s.w.a) will give you the Sabr to endure not having lots of material things. Either way, He(s.w.a) will give you. If you have Sabr, then things that seem like huge problems to other people will not seem like huge problems to you. Allah(s.w.a) will make these small in your eyes, so you will not act as if you have alot of problems, even if other people think that you do.   

Thanks for your insight. 

I should've phrased my first post better, as I said "All my problems in my life, could be a result of this". Not all my problems, as you said there is no one who doesn't have problems in their life, be it whatever background, but I sometimes suspect that some hardships we are facing could be a worldly consequence of haram sustenance. We may never know for sure.

 

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If your father earned money thru haram, there will be consequences for this, either in this life, the next life or both. Because you are connected to him by circumstances, as well as blood, these consequences may 'spill over' onto you in this life, because that is the nature of this life. But that doesn't mean you are responsible before Allah(s.w.a) for these consequences. Actually, he is doing thulm on you by exposing you to the consequences of his evil actions. But if you are patient thru these trials and make sincere efforts to disconnect from him financially and earn your money in a halal way, Allah(s.w.a) will increase your sustenance and you will eventually be free of these consequences that he may be suffering. 

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On 3/20/2018 at 6:38 AM, The Light said:

:bismillah:

:salam:

Hope everyone is well.

It's been a while, since I came to know something devastating and it has been bothering me, because I think it has affected my life negatively.

Here's a little bit of backstory:

I found out that it is highly likely that my father brought haram earnings into our house. Hence, that means throughout my teenage life and early 20s, I was having haram food and possibly spending money from which khums was not paid. I currently live in a house which my father bought a few years ago and I spend from money obtained from selling our property, which I think is haram and khums is not paid from them, both the house and money. Now, I am unemployed and I'm trying my hardest to find a job to earn halal rizq, but it's very competitive and I have no choice, but to spend from possibly haram money. 

My father is separated from us, because he married a vulgar woman, living in his mansion and traveling the world, while he doesn't care what we are going through.

Now, the question is how does this work? I had no involvement in what my father did, because I was too young to understand. What about the house we are living in? Is Allahسُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى going to hold me responsible as well and will this affect me this world? I believe it has, because of all the problems I have in my life, it could be a result of this.

As a I said, I have no job. I'm searching, but I get rejected everywhere I apply. This is maddening. All these years, I thought my father was a noble man, but no he was the opposite, he was just pretending... Or maybe Shaytan got to him at some point.

Please, I need your input.

:salam:

In Karbala Imam Hussein(as) wanted to talk to his enemies but they didn't listen by shouting, roaring, ... Imam Hussein(as) informed them of the reason of their deeds:"Your stomaches is filled with haram earnings."

But it doesn't mean that people have no will. Because everything Yazid ibn Muawiyah(la) ate, spent, ... was based on haram earnings and other haram things but his son which was fed by haram all og his life is Muawiyah ibn Yazid or the secod Muwaiyah.

He rejected to become caliph because he believed anyome rather than Ahlulbayts(as) would usurp the caliphood.

Ja'far kazab was the grandson, son, brother and uncle of 4 infalliable Imams no haram food or earnings was given to him by his family but he claimed to be the 12th Imam.

Always the choice is YOURS.

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On 3/22/2018 at 5:04 AM, Abu Hadi said:

If your father earned money thru haram, there will be consequences for this, either in this life, the next life or both. Because you are connected to him by circumstances, as well as blood, these consequences may 'spill over' onto you in this life, because that is the nature of this life. But that doesn't mean you are responsible before Allah(s.w.a) for these consequences. Actually, he is doing thulm on you by exposing you to the consequences of his evil actions. But if you are patient thru these trials and make sincere efforts to disconnect from him financially and earn your money in a halal way, Allah(s.w.a) will increase your sustenance and you will eventually be free of these consequences that he may be suffering. 

I see, that does make sense.

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On 3/22/2018 at 10:13 AM, Hidaren said:

:salam:

In Karbala Imam Hussein(as) wanted to talk to his enemies but they didn't listen by shouting, roaring, ... Imam Hussein(as) informed them of the reason of their deeds:"Your stomaches is filled with haram earnings."

But it doesn't mean that people have no will. Because everything Yazid ibn Muawiyah(la) ate, spent, ... was based on haram earnings and other haram things but his son which was fed by haram all og his life is Muawiyah ibn Yazid or the secod Muwaiyah.

He rejected to become caliph because he believed anyome rather than Ahlulbayts(as) would usurp the caliphood.

Ja'far kazab was the grandson, son, brother and uncle of 4 infalliable Imams no haram food or earnings was given to him by his family but he claimed to be the 12th Imam.

Always the choice is YOURS.

That's a brilliant example. Haven't thought about it much before, actually. 

That's right, things aren't that black and white in this matter.

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On 20/03/2018 at 9:38 PM, The Light said:

:bismillah:

:salam:

Hope everyone is well.

It's been a while, since I came to know something devastating and it has been bothering me, because I think it has affected my life negatively.

Here's a little bit of backstory:

I found out that it is highly likely that my father brought haram earnings into our house. Hence, that means throughout my teenage life and early 20s, I was having haram food and possibly spending money from which khums was not paid. I currently live in a house which my father bought a few years ago and I spend from money obtained from selling our property, which I think is haram and khums is not paid from them, both the house and money. Now, I am unemployed and I'm trying my hardest to find a job to earn halal rizq, but it's very competitive and I have no choice, but to spend from possibly haram money. 

My father is separated from us, because he married a vulgar woman, living in his mansion and traveling the world, while he doesn't care what we are going through.

Now, the question is how does this work? I had no involvement in what my father did, because I was too young to understand. What about the house we are living in? Is Allahسُبْحَانَهُ وَ تَعَالَى going to hold me responsible as well and will this affect me this world? I believe it has, because of all the problems I have in my life, it could be a result of this.

As a I said, I have no job. I'm searching, but I get rejected everywhere I apply. This is maddening. All these years, I thought my father was a noble man, but no he was the opposite, he was just pretending... Or maybe Shaytan got to him at some point.

Please, I need your input.

Rather than judging your father in public, I would suggest that you focus on your goal of becoming an independent and a sincere Muslim who pays due taxes.

I do not think that you will be questioned on the day of judgment regarding the obligations of your father.

As for this world, you are bound (by fate) to face the consequences of how people around you act and react. The important thing is how you respond ..........

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10 hours ago, Abbas. said:

Rather than judging your father in public, I would suggest that you focus on your goal of becoming an independent and a sincere Muslim who pays due taxes.

Don't get me wrong, I appreciate your advice, but my intention wasn't to judge, but to give the readers a gist of the scenario, so they can give me advice on how I can approach this problem. Because, the actions of my father directly affects me and my family. Let's say as an example, my dad, is someone who doesn't fast or listens to haram music. Well, I couldn't care less, because it doesn't affect me. So, yeah, I wanted to make it clear to myself, and make sure I have nothing to do with this, because at the moment everything is wishy-washy in my life.

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I have read many of the responses on this post. How can people guess at the judgement God will pass on judgement day ?
It must be hard always wondering and second guessing if you have pleased Allah or not. 

 

It was said best in the one post above "The one who sins is the one who will die. The child will not share the guilt of the parent, nor will the parent share the guilt of the child." You cannot be suffering spiritually because of what your father has done, only emotionally and maybe physically. 
I also don't think you have judged your father very badly in public. Only you know whether he was a good father to you and a good husband to your mother or if he made 
poor decisions. But you do need to try to forgive him so you don't carry resentment and anger and frustration around with you for the rest of your life. 
you are not your earthly father. You can make better decisions in your life.  How wonderful to know that you have a heavenly Father who loves you and cares for you
It is from your heavenly Father that your true identity comes. I will pray that your job search works out well. 

 

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