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Salam.

I feel lost and depressed. My days are unproductive, I've been home for over 2 months doing nothing, everything requires a lot of will power. I have no interest in doing anything, I barely eat and take care of myself. I feel distanced from God and I hate it, I hate myself and I hate what i have become. Im frustarted and angry, I just dont know what to do, it's driving me crazy and I just can't take it anymore. I have no patience, every small thing triggers me and makes me explode. I spend most of my time alone so I dont upset my parents and they hate the way I am. Sometimes I feel like harming myself, But I fight the urge.

Sometimes I wonder if I even fear God anymore, i went through a phase and stopped praying for a while, But got back to it. I try my best to pray the 5 daily prayer, but sometimes I just can't. I keep telling myself that I will change for the better and make a difference, But it just never happens. I dont trust myself anymore, I end up feeling hopeless and just wish God would take my soul already. 

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I have been through severe depression in the past .The best way to get out from Depression is consulting a Therapist/Psychologist, they would be really helpful.

Also you need to stop being alone get and start spending time with your close ones (parents,sibilings,friends,family etc) . You need to get help for everyone possible, you'll think no one cares about you etc etc, but when you start opening up to them they will be really helpful.

You need to stop spending your time thinking, it will only make you feel more and more Sad. You need to spend time doing something your good at. I started blogging about sports during my bad phase and made few bucks for myself these small things, appreciations make you feel happy.

Being sad doesn't really help, look around you see the good things. Think of good things about yourself. Remind yourself of everything you did well. And stop thinking you are useless.

Get out of this depression as soon as possible. Being depressed won't help you at any cost. It made me fail at 5 out of 6 subjects in college and I realised it a bit to late.

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1 hour ago, laithAlIRAQI said:

Salam.

I feel lost and depressed. My days are unproductive, I've been home for over 2 months doing nothing, everything requires a lot of will power. I have no interest in doing anything, I barely eat and take care of myself. I feel distanced from God and I hate it, I hate myself and I hate what i have become. Im frustarted and angry, I just dont know what to do, it's driving me crazy and I just can't take it anymore. I have no patience, every small thing triggers me and makes me explode. I spend most of my time alone so I dont upset my parents and they hate the way I am. Sometimes I feel like harming myself, But I fight the urge.

Sometimes I wonder if I even fear God anymore, i went through a phase and stopped praying for a while, But got back to it. I try my best to pray the 5 daily prayer, but sometimes I just can't. I keep telling myself that I will change for the better and make a difference, But it just never happens. I dont trust myself anymore, I end up feeling hopeless and just wish God would take my soul already. 

Prophet PBUHHP said: "Asking for death or calling death is wrong because the life of a believer is prolonged so that he may do good deeds'. 

Bro, everyone is fighting in his life, but we do not have cameras to look into others' life. Be strong and be disciplined. Just don't sit idle and all time thinking. 

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You need to seriously stop spending time alone. That’s only going to make it worse for you. Go out, go to the mosque, shopping, spend time with your family, your relatives, ask them to go out with you, volunteer at places.

 Get your mind off things that are making you depressed. And firstly, why do you hate yourself? If it’s because of some mistake you committed then know that we’re all humans and we all commit mistakes. I think the main reason you’re feeling like this is because you feel distanced from God, and that should give you a hint that you need to work on your relationship with God.

Don’t take salah as a chore, instead when you stand on your prayer mat, pray slowly and try and concentrate on the words and what you’re saying. 

Depression is a serious problem brother, and you need to do something about it quick. Maybe if it’s possible for you, you should take a visit to the Imams.. it’ll really help your spirituality.

And if you hate yourself because of your sins, then the door of repentance is ALWAYS open for everyone. Learn from your past and work on your future. After your prayers, sit down and ask Allah for forgiveness.

You don’t need to read a long dua, but just say whatever’s in your heart and tell God that you will improve yourself. You need to make that first step to change, it won’t come in an instance, but you need time and effort, lots of effort. Even your parents won’t be happy if you stay like this any longer.

Never reach a stage where you lose hope in yourself. Fight your bad urges, always remind yourself of Allah and think about the Akhira. Read about the lives of the Imams, even if you’re uninterested and don’t want to, force yourself. Sometimes you need to force yourself to change because change doesn’t come out of no where. 

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Salam Aleikum , thanks for opening up. I think everyone of us goes through depressions once in a while. Of corse if you think its chronic it is good to seek help. 

what helps me in depressive periods is daily remembering 3 or 4 things that I am grateful for. The Dhikr La illa ha illa anta Subhanikka inni kuntu min al Zalimin has done wonders for me in very down moods. Taking ghusl more often...

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I been though this phase.Try to find work just anything to get your mind off depressing thoughts.If you still feel bad remember Imam Hussain A.S. you will feel as if a heavy load has been lifted off your chest.Read book Ayatullah Qazwini has great biograhies on ahylul bayat.Try to read any of them.Do your best to find work do tawasul and then leave it to Allah.

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On 10/8/2017 at 7:57 AM, laithAlIRAQI said:

Salam.

I feel lost and depressed. My days are unproductive, I've been home for over 2 months doing nothing, everything requires a lot of will power. I have no interest in doing anything, I barely eat and take care of myself. I feel distanced from God and I hate it, I hate myself and I hate what i have become. Im frustarted and angry, I just dont know what to do, it's driving me crazy and I just can't take it anymore. I have no patience, every small thing triggers me and makes me explode. I spend most of my time alone so I dont upset my parents and they hate the way I am. Sometimes I feel like harming myself, But I fight the urge.

Sometimes I wonder if I even fear God anymore, i went through a phase and stopped praying for a while, But got back to it. I try my best to pray the 5 daily prayer, but sometimes I just can't. I keep telling myself that I will change for the better and make a difference, But it just never happens. I dont trust myself anymore, I end up feeling hopeless and just wish God would take my soul already. 

Salaam Alaykum

As you can see, we all have been in this situation before. I exactly understand what you are talking about. Several things that help me to be on track in this situation: praying at prime time, salaat-ul-layl, and walking along the lake. The first two steps help a lot. Walking along lake is also helpful. Try to go to mosque and spend your time over there. Talk with people over there.

Try to get out of this situation and know that you are NOT alone in depression. It happens once in a while for everybody.

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To clear up a misconception about depression:

unless you recieve treatment for your depression, (depression is different from sadness.) it WILL NOT go away on its own. 

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Wsalam.

It takes a lot of will power and courage to open up about something like. First off, hats off to you for talking about this. It's a big thing that you realize things are not going well and that something is wrong. A lot of people continue living in that state of sadness and demise and never realize it was something that could easily be helped.

Having had depression myself for a very long period of time and also being a doctor now MashaAllah, I can say without a doubt that what you're going through is clinical depression. There are MANY ways to get help. Among the best things you can do is get a consult with a psychiatrist/psychologist. In addition to this crucial step, you should try harder to not be by yourself. Contact with and meet up with your friends and family, go out for shopping or just to eat something. Try and connect with your spiritual side, work hard to say your prayers on time and with some concentration. Work on your diet and sleep. Take some time out for exercise (a brisk walk for 30 mins daily will be more than enough). This list can go on and on.

However it's very important to realize that most of the time depression will be due to an underlying cause that will only be helped via medication. Just like a diabetic needs to take medication or insulin to lower blood sugar, or a hypertensive needs to take medication to lower blood pressure. And in such cases, nothing in the world can help unless you get treatment for the cause. Hence it is extremely important to get a consult as soon as you can.

You have all the help in the world available, you just gotta reach out. Peace.

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On 10/13/2017 at 6:10 PM, Islandsandmirrors said:

To clear up a misconception about depression:

unless you recieve treatment for your depression, (depression is different from sadness.) it WILL NOT go away on its own. 

this is false.. stop telling people to take drugs.. I was depressed and came out of it on my own.. without drugs! exercise and strengthen your iman.. depression is simply being away from God. Exerciseing helps with the chemical endorphines.

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5 minutes ago, kirtc said:

this is false.. stop telling people to take drugs.. I was depressed and came out of it on my own.. without drugs! exercise and strengthen your iman.. depression is simply being away from God. Exerciseing helps with the chemical endorphines.

Kirtc, that is kinda an unfair statement, the medicine is used to help people and if it's available why not use it?

There's a difference with being upset and having actual depression. Yes some people can control their depression without drugs but other need the help.

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4 minutes ago, A Muslim Artist said:

Kirtc, that is kinda an unfair statement, the medicine is used to help people and if it's available why not use it?

There's a difference with being upset and having actual depression. Yes some people can control their depression without drugs but other need the help.

trust me I know what depression is.. I was depressed for almost 10 years. severely.. drugs are only a temporary solution. they also cause other problems, but the main one being leaving the person dependamt on them to be happy. 

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6 minutes ago, kirtc said:

trust me I know what depression is.. I was depressed for almost 10 years. severely.. drugs are only a temporary solution. they also cause other problems, but the main one being leaving the person dependamt on them to be happy. 

No one is telling anyone to close their eyes and just take drugs. In many cases, drugs help the person and then in an organized and gradual manner the doctor decreases the dose till the drug is stopped. Depression isn't a one-off thing, meaning that one needs to look into every possible way of help. Something that helps one person, may or may not help another person.

Hence the importance of not labelling medications as just 'drugs' that are temporary in their benefit. Medications can be just as important as any other way of help, and if nothing helps, then they may be the only answer. It's important to have an open mind and not look at things through a narrow tunnel vision. Everyone's struggle through depression is unique and can't be equated universally.

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1 hour ago, kirtc said:

trust me I know what depression is.. I was depressed for almost 10 years. severely.. drugs are only a temporary solution. they also cause other problems, but the main one being leaving the person dependamt on them to be happy. 

Forgive me if I made it sound like you didn't have depression. I defiently agree with you about them causing other problems and only being temporary. I originally spoke because the way you worded it at first made it sound like you should never use the drugs.

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Exercise. Regular exercise can be as effective attreating depression as medication. Not only does exercise boost serotonin, endorphins, and other feel-good brain chemicals, it triggers the growth of new brain cells and connections, just like antidepressants do.

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2 hours ago, Khudi said:

No one is telling anyone to close their eyes and just take drugs. In many cases, drugs help the person and then in an organized and gradual manner the doctor decreases the dose till the drug is stopped. Depression isn't a one-off thing, meaning that one needs to look into every possible way of help. Something that helps one person, may or may not help another person.

Hence the importance of not labelling medications as just 'drugs' that are temporary in their benefit. Medications can be just as important as any other way of help, and if nothing helps, then they may be the only answer. It's important to have an open mind and not look at things through a narrow tunnel vision. Everyone's struggle through depression is unique and can't be equated universally.

salam, I am speaking from experience. 2 family members, and 3 friends I have are all on medication. Seroxat, lithium, xanax.. and not sure what the other anti-depressants are, but I have seen them all go insane crazy when trying to stop them. They are stuck with them for what seems to be almost a decade of trying to "slowly lower the dose. Also, I have seen my friends and family get worse while on the medication. That is why I strongly oppose them. Look at what is happening in the US opioid crisis.. the manufacturers have no moral compass anymore.. 

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Very sad to hear about this Laithe ;(. But it seems you yourself realize the source of the problem, the feel of being unproductive. Working is the salt of our lives, without it, we have nothing to do and say, and we can't even progress socially. It is important for you to find a job or study something that lets you build a routine, a circle of friends, and feel like a productive member of society.

You are pretty much valid to be productive. Will power is required, of course, but only at first. It gets easier when you build a solid routine.

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I hope you return to a better mindset soon, my friend. 

Try to find a focus.. literally any topic, skill, etc. I had a similar situation that caused me to fail my A Levels, but it focused me on producing music and exploring my creative side that I had never delved into before, probably one of the best decisions of my life even though I rarely even produce nowadays. 

Never thought I would come out of the state I was in during school but looking back at the situation now, it seems quite trivial. You can draw strength from all that you experience and you will assure yourself you can work through anything.

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2 hours ago, kirtc said:

salam, I am speaking from experience. 2 family members, and 3 friends I have are all on medication. Seroxat, lithium, xanax.. and not sure what the other anti-depressants are, but I have seen them all go insane crazy when trying to stop them. They are stuck with them for what seems to be almost a decade of trying to "slowly lower the dose. Also, I have seen my friends and family get worse while on the medication. That is why I strongly oppose them. Look at what is happening in the US opioid crisis.. the manufacturers have no moral compass anymore.. 

Wsalam. I don't deny that you've had a rather disturbing experience when it comes to treatment for depression. However, the matter is not that simple. There's been decades of work and research done before a medicine gets approval to hit the market. I respect your opinion but it is more based on opinion and myth rather than fact. Depression isn't a problem limited to the U.S. or the West, it is a global epidemic. Millions of people are benefitting from therapy and medication and this is not an opinion, but a fact. Medical science is based on fact. Also, you mention 'opioid crisis'. Anti-depressants or many other psychiatric medications have nothing to do with opioids, which have a completely different mode of action and purpose.

I do empathize with you though. A lot of times, finding the right medication for one specific patient isn't that easy and the psychiatrist is compelled to try a number of them before finding the right combination and dose. In addition to this, there are many under qualified psychiatrists out there and doctors claiming to be psychiatrists that make use of such circumstances and exploit patients. Hence, the position you have is completely understandable. At the end of the day, good doctors/psychiatrists will always work for the benefit of the patient and never work against their interest. I hope you have the good fortune to come across someone like that.

Good health to you and the brother who started this thread. 

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6 minutes ago, Khudi said:

Anti-depressants or many other psychiatric medications have nothing to do with opioids

my point was, pharmaceutical companies dont care what they do to the people as long as they sell. 

sorry Im not convinced. I have yet to see it work in real life. I also have a hard time believing that 50 years ago people couldn't be treated for depression. 

I do however believe in remedies like homeopathy and supplements, but definitely not anti depressants and anti-psychotics 

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I just started using Lexapro. I am very emotional person and it makes me less emotional. I feel very numb and I like that. I also get more positive thoughts after taking it. I hope if I keep using it, I will also be able to get rid of my anger. I always thought you get antidepressants after some long session with psychiatrist but my doctor asked me few questions and wrote the prescription. 

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People want to numb their problems.  

Drugs doesn't solve the problem.

Talking and getting to the root of the problem will help you sort out your feelings.

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On ‎10‎/‎13‎/‎2017 at 6:10 PM, Islandsandmirrors said:

To clear up a misconception about depression:

unless you recieve treatment for your depression, (depression is different from sadness.) it WILL NOT go away on its own. 

Sometimes, "depression" is not the clinical kind but emotional exhaustion.

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