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forte last won the day on November 9

forte had the most liked content!


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  1. I see what you mean in that having children is becoming more popular now and it is being led by those who are high profile. But I also see in the professional sphere that some women are choosing not to have any which may balance this out(?) Also, there is a developing trend for couples with a combined income to each work shorter hours per week so that family issues can be better addressed, and so that both men and women can have a better quality non-workaholic life.
  2. The end of the White race is a cultural and demographic inevitability probably within some of our lifetimes. I think at this point it is pretty much a non issue other than it will hopefully bring about a post-racial age.
  3. It is inevitable that any blending of cultures will bring change. People are social and will inter-relate and develop strong bonds due to learned respect and new understanding of each other. Children attend the same schools and develop friendships that will in some cases be life long. Intermarriage is becoming more and more common. This is not necessarily a bad thing as perhaps the good from both the West and the East may emerge. Tribalism is pretty much over.
  4. Depression

    I agree. Also, sometimes people choose to "miss" the point for whatever reason and that is OK.
  5. Depression

    @starlight You can hide behind all the lifestyle mumble jumble distractions about lifestyle all you want but it does not bury the fact that you and your cohort have told people on here with a life threatening illness to go off their medications. @Laayla in a recent post someone who has self identified with having a serious illness (bipolar), who courageously went out of their way to describe it amid the pressures against her choice of medically supervised treatment, said "Insh'Allah one day with strength, courage, and dedication you too will no longer need the drugs." This sums up the judgement. Bipolar is a chemical imbalance and it is not from an individual's lack of strength, courage or dedication (or anything else) that they are afflicted with it. There is a huge STIGMA against people with mental health disorders and those of you who feel the deeply innate need to essentially harass people with life threatening mental health issues do nothing to foster the acceptance and understanding that needs to take place - you are very much doing the opposite. Equating brain chemistry disorders with the evils of "Western" lifestyle choices is bizarre. Equating brain chemistry disorders to specific life experiences that you may have had in your life is bizarre. Telling someone that you have never met, never examined and who you have no access to their medical history or records and who has self identified as bipolar and who have said they are under psychiatric care, to go off their medications is tantamount to evil and serves no purpose that is righteous. There is a huge gap in the education and awareness of mental health issues especially in the East. Inshallah that will slowly be addressed and people who have had to cower, hide and live a life of disengagement will be able to have the ability to come out in the open, address their medical needs and thrive to the best of their ability.
  6. Depression

    @starlight Regardless of people's choices over their own lives, it does not give anyone the right to evaluate and judge. There seems to be an unquenchable need of some people to tear apart those who are vulnerable and struggling to cope with basics in life (that most of us take for granted) with condemnation, rebukes and unending commentary on what they SHOULD be doing - because they are doing it WRONG. "Shoulding" on others is the hallmark of people with weak character and an avoidance or fear to address their own issues. They don't realize that they are the actually the ones with the crippling results of their own self imposed limitations. So many comments on here from a select few about how people with chronic illnesses and how they choose to address and deal with them, are obviously weak in strength and character and worse. Perhaps members of the coven of those with "bitter auntie syndrome" - an ugly but, fortunately, curable disorder - could examine and adjust the person in the mirror first by finding some beauty and love in their own life which will lead to the ability to recognize it in the lives of others. Most people do pretty much the best they can with their given abilities and situations. Support and recognition of their successes with their challenges goes a long way.
  7. Depression

    I meant to quote the post and didn't for some reason. I was referring to your judgement of your cousin with Rheumatoid Arthritis who only "popped pills" and is now in a wheel chair due to her decisions. Intimating that it is her fault that she is in a wheelchair.. I know that that disease is incredibly painful and debilitating. For myself, I am not in a position to judge someone trying to relieve excruciating 24/7 pain when I am relatively pain free. I don't walk in their shoes. We have no idea as to the degree of her pain, degree of fear to move certain ways that will cause even more pain or her rational to do what she does. As for over medication: Anti-depressants and stimulants are grossly over prescribed because they are prescribed by GP's who have few tools at their hands to get people moving in a positive direction and it seems like a quick fix. It is not OK. However, I am more concerned about the stimulant prescriptions to young children who are misdiagnosed with ADHD than I am about the anti-depressants although they too have many negatives. Over prescribed medications are a huge problem but that is a separate issue. We are talking about people who are competently diagnosed by certified mental health professionals, not with your 15 minute visit with your GP - that is not a diagnosis of anything. A lot goes into a competent diagnosis and it often takes several weeks of in-patient tests and observations... as the two members here who have spoken out to repeatedly defend themselves (!) have had done. I am not talking about the actions of some GP who is at a loss to know what to do when their patient sees them due to some home or work environment issue that is upsetting them. I am talking about diagnosing a true chronic illness. Anyone who is diagnosed by a certified mental health professional with clinical depression is not just going through a rough patch in life; it is a pervasive condition that may ebb a bit but does not go away and is not dependent on specific incidents in their life. It is organic and ongoing. Most people with clinical depression that I have come in contact have had a family history where they have at least one relative who has committed suicide or has become incapacitated due to their illness. Anyone with a psychotic or mood disorder (very rapid and dangerous mood swings such as bipolar) are at the mercy of their brain chemistry. No gym membership is going to fix that. We ALL can do better by proper diet and exercise and seeking opportunities for personal growth and achievement. Including those of us who hunch over a computer all day. Practicing our tolerance, acceptance and love of others is one of those ways. Not submitting to prevalent cultural practices that demean others is another. Mental health patients do the best they can with what they have. As we all do. Support and acceptance goes along way to giving someone the confidence they need to be the best they can, and to try new avenues of care consistent with the strengths and limitations they were given.
  8. Depression

    @starlight This is victim blaming. The majority of psychiatric illnesses are genetically based. You are born with them. Medical genograms are one of the first assessment tools with a new patient. And these diseases are also somatic - a scan of a schizophrenic brain shows significant physical abnormalities that impact the surrounding structures (in addition to the chemical abnormalities of course). Psychotropics help people cope and to have a shot at a life that you take for granted. Have you ever seen a person with schizophrenia hallucinating? A bipolar individual in a manic uncontrolled state or in a suicidal depth of despair? It is the closest definition to hell that we will see in our mortal lives. They have brain chemistry that is not functioning normally. Telling them that they are to blame because of they are weak, lack character, don't pray, exercise enough, etc etc is ignorant. Some illnesses require medical intervention and these definitely qualify. To condemn people to this life of hell is arrogant and cruel. As for mortality, suicidal patients are those who are untreated (either by choice or they do not respond to meds) or have gone off their meds. One reason that people go off their meds because others tell them that they are the equivalent of "addicted" to them. Guilt, shame and pain. Should others with life threatening illnesses go off their meds? Is there a maximum number of years for those with a non functioning pancreas to have access to insulin? how about thyroxine for thyroid under-function? pace makers? etc etc Don't Muslims (Shia esp in many parts of the world) have enough to deal with in terms of judgement and discrimination? We need to be supporting those who need help in our ummah, not condemning their efforts to cope and be functional and accepted for who they are and for their choices in their medically supervised care without our morally superior chastisement. This is just one of many areas where cultural judgement reigns supreme.
  9. Depression

    Absolutely! Actually, there are many cases of athletes in prime condition suffering fatal heart attacks due to the fact that their congenital heart conditions were never diagnosed but became apparent due to the extra stress on the heart... so much judgement here to do with illness. I am really surprised!
  10. Depression

    There is no cure at this time, and so, of course, there is no reduction in morbidity or mortality with those who use psychotropics. Medications for people with serious brain chemistry abnormalities (and there is a ton of literature on this), have significantly improved the ability of those afflicted to live a somewhat normal (and often safe) life - what we nonchalantly take for granted is a daily painful, struggle for others. To stigmatize (and yes, these judgemental and arrogant comments are stigmatizing) people who need these medications is exceptionally cruel. I am a mental health professional and have seen, first hand, those who are literally imprisoned by their illness be able to have a functional status when successful titration of medications is achieved. The co-morbidity of depression and other life impactful disorders is significant. Often, one cannot be determined and addressed without treatment, first, of the other. Bipolar, schizo-affective bipolar and schizophrenia should not be left untreated - and to suggest to people to go off their meds in favour of some arrogant faulty based ideas is grossly irresponsible. When untreated, for mere bipolar alone, suicidal ideation and attempt is 25% or greater with completed suicides around 14 - 15%. Many in our community life a life of hell - they are hidden, chastised and demeaned due to lack of education and understanding. It is incredibly sad that this goes on, but it is even more upsetting that these ideas are being promoted and fostered.
  11. Depression

    This is an excellent, resourced article. Abstract Mental illness stigma continues to be a major barrier for individuals with mental illness. In this paper, we 1. define constructs that comprise stigma (e.g., attitudes, stereotypes, prejudice, discrimination), 2. discuss the harmful effects (e.g., label avoidance, public stigma, self-stigma) and 3. present factors that may influence them (e.g., concealability). In order to better understand mental health stigma in Muslim community, we 4. focus on intersectional stigma and present literature on the complex relationships among race/ethnicity, gender, class, religion, and health status among Muslims. In addition, we 5. include literature highlighting culturally specific presentations of symptoms and mental health problems. Thank you for posting this. Unfortunately for those who are suffering, it will take a long time for centuries-old, culturally based prejudice and discrimination to be overcome - just like any negative, harmful attitude and stereotype. Intolerance, ignorance and fear of the unknown continues to impact many innocent people who struggle for basic mental health survival and community acceptance, sometimes with devastating results. In addition, the silence from those in our community, who are educated and knowledgeable, is deafening. I am not sure which behaviour is more harmful.
  12. Depression

    It is all too apparent that stigma continues to be a huge problem for people living with mental illness - it is an unnecessary and cruel burden to add to someone who, as it is, lives life in a constant struggle. Ignorant attitudes undermine a person's sense of self, relationships, well-being and as well impacts prospects for achieving an acceptable quality of life. I can't emphasize enough the importance of education and awareness. All of us should take some time to educate ourselves about mental health diseases and their etiology... making sure to resource from an accredited source.
  13. I thought it was funny that those reportedly being detained were being held in 5 star hotels.. Wonder what Yemen can offer..
  14. Depression

    Congrats to you for having the courage to stand up against this cultural stigma. Thankfully, this ignorance is slowly but surely waning.
  15. Depression

    The woman in the video is a social worker - not a specialist in brain chemistry or psychiatric disorders. It is important for those with mental health disorders to follow the advice of their medical professional - not "experts" on online forums or youtube videos. If you are questioning your treatment, seek advice from another certified professional in the mental health field. Mental health issues are very real and can be life threatening. There is a culture (especially from Asia) that does not recognize the seriousness of a brain disorder and because they cannot tangibly see this disorder and don't understand it they judge the individual and then dismiss the chemical imbalance as a personal weakness of the afflicted. Would you listen to someone who told you to stop taking insulin after you have been diagnosed with diabetes? Brain chemistry deficits are just as real (and again, can be just as deadly) as pancreas chemistry deficits.