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pleaseforgiveme

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  1. anxiety, depression and ocd

    thank you everyone may Allah bless you all currently neither the psychologist is helping nor the medication, only Allah can help tnx
  2. anxiety, depression and ocd

    tnx, your this sentence made me feel so good
  3. anxiety, depression and ocd

    i am taking medication at the moment but its for my depression, not sure if it helps with ocd too
  4. anxiety, depression and ocd

    tnx , i enjoyed it, very nice
  5. anxiety, depression and ocd

    can you explain these 4 steps abit more
  6. anxiety, depression and ocd

    thank you for the replies, i will read and listen to them many times to understand
  7. Hi its my first time posting and visiting this forum, i thought i might get a help. I have been suffering from anxiety, depression for the last 6 years and now its been like 2 years that i am suffering from a serious ocd. few years ago i attempt sucide due to panic attacks and lifes personal matters, and hospitoal locked me and brought Psychiatrist. however i was on medication for few months, but for the last few years i have been taking that medication on/off. its been like 2 months that i am seeing a psychologist once a week, and i am back to regular medication. however its my 3rd week of medication and i dont think its helping me, but the doctor and psychologist said it will start working after few weeks. Now i wanna talk about OCD. i swear its killing me. i have divided my room into 2 sections. one side clean, and one side putting stuff when i use it for outside, like phone, wallet etc. however if they mix up with my other stuff i have to clean all of them and it takes hours. once i go outside no matter what, once i am back home i take bath for atleast 1 hour. and change clothes regularly. i am 25 years old and im so close to kill myself, caz i think i am making my family so stressed. i cannot pray, i always cry and ask for forgiveness. being a muslim makes the ocd even worse, i am not blaming or anything but i mean it makes it more suspecious for my mind. lets say i wake up in the morning but i have only dreamed about a girl or etc, then my mind says oh wait you are not clean, you might look at your spot, and most of the time my negative mind wins and i go and bath for hours( ghusle janabat). sometimes in movie a scene comes etc, then same thing happens, i doubt myself. should i kill myself ? seeing all these, i cannot even pray at all. i wash 100000 of times a day if i touch something. even when i recite, i keep repeating the same thing, and i doubt etc. and it takes me ages to finish a short surah. waswaas is killing me im suffering my friends. my psychologist doesnt know in these details. but i told him that i do have ocd. i cry all the time, and i ask for forgiveness all the time caz i cannot pray bcaz i am sick. and i am sure i have read it in quran that if you are sick then god will understand. i am controlling myself so hard not to harm myself, bcaz i understand its not good thing at all specially if you are a muslim and you know that you will end up in hell if you commit suicide, i hope i get better, but who knows when/where i might do it. thank you whoever is reading and wishes to reply, but if you think i dont even deserve a reply, then just pray for me. one thing else, most of the time when i cry, then i tell myself, remember god is testing you , or perhaps, good things will happen soon ,and god knows everything, and ofcourse all these sickness might have a reason.
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