Salaam Alaikum sisters and brothers,
I come here for explaining about my situation and see other people opinion about my case,
I am a 20 y.o guy born in Barcelona, Spain. My background comes from a catholic- but not practicant nor religous family.
About 2 years ago I started to become interested about Islam and started to make my own research into in on the net, etc. I also visited a Sunni mosque in Barcelona, where they explained me basis of Islam and some of their Sunni traditions.
On a travel to a North European country, I get to know an Afghan girl (Shia muslim) working on her family market, and I showed her my interest on her religion and asked some of my questions about it, she helped me with my issues and yea. I kind of liked the way she was explaining me about her religion, and we kept in contact with each other when I went back to my home city.
We became closer and closer with each other, talked about personal life, family, and of course, the religion.
About a year ago, I went back to that country, and there, after a year of research about Islam, and figuring out about my beliefs, I became a muslim in the Imam Ali Mosque (largest Shia mosque in Europe). The Imam taught me maaany many things during my stay, I spent lot of my time in the mosque, talking with other brothers, etc.
After converting to Muslim, at the begining when I was back home, I was praying on my room, and my family didn't really know anything about about my conversion, since I knew talking or explaining about this to them would be something difficult for them. But I had to explain about all this when Ramadan came, because I wanted to fast and perform it. So I had a serious talk with my family and explained everything about my conversion, about Islam and that I wanted to do Ramadan. At the first days it was very very difficult for them to understand it, and we had many fights and a not so-good atmosphere at home, but after some time, it all kind of normalised for them.
The Afghan girl I met was always a support for me, we always was in contact with each other, and really really helped me in the difficult moments with my family, as well as I was a support for her, we was talking a lot, helping with school issues, talking about our families, daily things, everything. And we "fell in love" with each other.
She of course keeps everything about me in secret with her family, and they don't know anything about me, she talks with me hiding the headsets, or deletes the conversations, and keeps everything hidden since sometimes her brothers check her phone.
She is 19 years old, and originally from Afghanistan, but has been living in Europe with her family for more than 15 years. She is Hazara Afghan, in case this helps.
She is the only daughter in the family and has 6 brothers.
The issue comes when we start to think about future, about being together and about the difficulties we might have. She says her family is pretty restrictive and her dad has even told her that he would like her to marry with some of her cousins, but she of course refuses to that. She says that the family can refuse her to marry with a Spanish guy instead of an Afghan one, or a Spanish guy who converted to islam without a muslim family, and yea..
I would like to know your thought about all this, if know some case about reverted man marrying a muslim woman, and if had issues with that. Because it's common to see marriages betwen converted woman and muslim man, but not the opposite..
Or if there is someone that knows about the Afghan traditions and could advice me with that, or give me their own oppinion.
We have met with each other because I've travelled to her city 2 times after meeting her for the first time, we didn't just see each other one time.
On the mosque, I got to know an Afghan man, and he resulted to be an Imam when he was in Afghanistan, as well he has been Imam in Iran and Dubai. We have become close to each other, explained me afghan traditions, and he has also helped me a lot with my Islam questions. I exposed to him my situation with the afghan girl, and he said that he could come with me and my family the day that I decide to go ask for her hand to her family. -- Will this help be very helpful?
Sorry for the long post, but felt like I had to explain it long so it could be understood, if you have any question, or something is not clear at all, be open to ask.
Thanks for your attention,