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Al Sharifa Layla

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About Al Sharifa Layla

  • Birthday November 18

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  1. Sex addiction/need advice.

    Al salam sisters and brothers, It's been a while since i posted, I was away but every now and then i would check your replies and comments which I'm very grateful for. Today things have become a lot different in many ways. Between the time i last posted and this moment, i discovered many things about myself and my now permanent husband. We got married permanently last March and we are both working on opening communication channels, forgiveness, understanding and patience. i feel that part of marriage is a constant willingness to be the best you can be for the person you love, even when the best is something you never thought you could do or accept. Truth is we're both growing together into the idea of the best versions of who we are. It takes time and a lot of understanding from both sides. Im not trying to advertise anything here but he was honest when he said he wants to change and be a better person for God, and for both of us, and he did it and is doing it, because it is a continuous decision to be the best you can be. I feel a bit foolish for my emotional posts late last year, not because they were untrue, but i feel there was a lot of left out details that would have painted a better picture of the situation - not in favor of anyone, but just the reality of it. Also, i saw many posts from sisters having the same issues, and i wanted to clarify that yes most men and women have trust and infidelity issues, but sometimes it can be solved, and things can heal and change and become better. Just remember to ask God for strength and to do what's best for you. I'm not saying it will be easy or it will happen instantly, but if there is a small seed of hope there, nurture it and give it a chance to grow. Thank you all for your support and advice, it's been an eye opener to know that so many people out there understand and actually have been through similar situations. It makes things a little less lonely up there in one's head sometimes. Ramadan Kareem sisters & brothers, w al salam. L
  2. Sex addiction/need advice.

    I do wish to know if doing mut3ah with a non muslim woman while he has one with me is 7alal, because he keeps saying theres nothing wrong with it and i should proof him otherwise.
  3. Sex addiction/need advice.

    Dear brother, I understand what you mean. I even myself told him that many times, sometimes i really feel im more intelligent and aware of things than he is even though he taught me almost everything. Im starting to really see how fooled i was... i dont want him anymore and im praying God strengthens this feeling in my heart. I did many times ask him for permanent marriage but he said not now we fight a lot. And anyways what i discovered is that he uses mut3ah in such a wrong way. Anyways, thank you for your wise words. I pray i get through this test because i feel so weak at the moment.
  4. Sex addiction/need advice.

    well here is the current situation - he currently traveled to visit his mother who is very sick - he will be away for a week. well, today i had a feeling he is still talking to person x (she is an older non muslim woman he used to know since a long time and had short mut3ah with her in the past) she is the person i found out he was still talking to in the beginning of the relationship and found pictures of her and so on. i had asked him many times if he had ended and he said yes, today i asked him again because i had a feeling and i was sure of it. he said he's still talking to her and he didnt really end the mut3ah (let me explain that this mut3ah is only for long distance internet usage so he can talk and masturbate to her) he hasnt seen her in years. now im not sure if he's planning to see her or take it a step further. all i know is i have to leave him because he said he will not stop talk to her and that she gives him peace (cuz i fight with him) and he told me to break up many times so its my fault he is lying to me and treating me this way. he also said he will always want her sexually and will always want me sexually too and the good side of me but not the side that gives him drama n hysteria over such things. now i know im at fault for allowing this to happen. and i know i have to leave him. i blocked his number and God gives me strength to never talk to him again. i can safely say that i did more than my best and i was a good person to him.
  5. Sex addiction/need advice.

    Dear Brother i know this isnt love but i did think it was.
  6. Sex addiction/need advice.

    i cant begin to tell you how much i loved your post. Its like you painted all my thoughts and feelings...i cant add anything more to it because it sums it all up. i just hope i God gives me the strength i need to follow on with my own decision to leave him. Ya rab.
  7. Sex addiction/need advice.

    Thank you. In my previous post i was very emotional asking for whether it is 7alal to do mut3ah with a non muslim woman but frankly it doesnt matter anymore because everyone is correct and i must walk away. its not a matter of morals now and if i can forgive him or not its a matter of whats good for me and how much he makes me suffer. Shukran
  8. Sex addiction/need advice.

    Please give me time to answer, ive had a rough week. Thank you
  9. Sex addiction/need advice.

    Salam all, apologies for not having answered anyone, been having lots of issues at home. Found out hes been hiding from me that he still didnt end the mut3ah he had done, actually lied about it. My question here is, is mut3ah 7alal with a christian woman? because he is doing it with a christian woman, now i know it is 7alal but while he has mut3ah with a muslim? please help. Shukran w salam
  10. Sex addiction/need advice.

    Salam, thank you for your reply, it was a very valid question for me and does not mean i lost grasp on reality. I come from a very different state of mind than what i am currently trying to be/achieve and im still learning. He never claimed it was 7alal. It was a personal question. I asked many questions on since yesterday for reasons of educating myself. I was born a muslim but only recently did i become a real muslim. shukran w salam
  11. Sex addiction/need advice.

    Salam brother, im aware of that for sure but needed to make things a bit clearer. Thanks w salam
  12. Sex addiction/need advice.

    because even good men are not free of sin, no one is perfect except God and if you had read my original post, you would have seen that i was asking for advice on how to curb my jealousy...and how do i stay calm in the face of all that and if i was sinning against myself for staying in such a relationship. I have not taken him as my God and please dont imply that im doing shirk. he is my husband and i will remain seeing the good side in him regardless of the situation. like i said this man wants to change and be better. its a matter of if i can handle it and see it through or not. also dont insult my husband and people you dont know personally and calling them names like loser because we are adults here trying to have a mature conversation. still im grateful for your reply and your time to read and engage in my post. salam
  13. Sex addiction/need advice.

    Salam Brother, he does want to quit for sure. shukran.
  14. Sex addiction/need advice.

    Im not sure i can do that
  15. Sex addiction/need advice.

    Salam, well first of all, it might be true that this is not the first time i've been hurt before in some what the same way but by no means does it indicate that i enjoy or seek this kind of relationship. all humans have deep rooted issues. women and men alike. i would say that his addiction stems from a deep rooted issue as well. but that does not mean we go around seeking pain. i would never leave a good man. and other from his weakness, he is a good man in the eyes of many and hopefully for his sake God as well. but again, i would never ever leave a good man because im a good woman. it just happens so that i fell in love with someone who causes me a lot of pain and that his issues clash with my issues (mainly insecurity). women are not stupid. women are much more emotionally intelligent than men and its unfair to say that cause they can get any man they choose to stay with the ones who hurt them. love is a complicated thing and i know i am a weak person and i should walk away from such pain. maybe i will, its better to pray for me that to say hurtful words about women. thank you brother. salam