6 replies to this topic

[Abu Lulu]

My previous topic was locked for no apparent reason, so therefor I'm going to try for a 2nd time.

My previous question probably wasn't direct enough, so let me rephrase:
For Mut'ah it's not needed to ask permission from my 1st wife. This means I can do Mut'ah behind the back of my wife. I know that this isn't the best way to behave as a man, but there isn't a law that prohibits this. So even if I would do this, I could not be blamed. It's Islamically correct...

Question: How isn't this extremely in favor of men and extremely against women?
(we can sleep around, despite having a wife)

Discuss!

Edited by Al-Muntadhar, 09 July 2012 - 01:57 PM.

[Marbles]

Al-Muntadhar, on 09 July 2012 - 01:56 PM, said:

My previous topic was locked for no apparent reason, so therefor I'm going to try for a 2nd time.

My previous question probably wasn't direct enough, so let me rephrase:
For Mut'ah it's not needed to ask permission from my 1st wife. This means I can do Mut'ah behind the back of my wife. I know that this isn't the best way to behave as a man, but there isn't a law that prohibits this. So even if I would do this, I could not be blamed. It's Islamically correct...

Question: How isn't this extremely in favor of men and extremely against women?
(we can sleep around, despite having a wife)

Discuss!

There is nothing to discuss in so far as you seek clarification on this bit of Islamic law. No one will dare to deny that it favours men and disfavours women. This is as clear as Jamshed's bowl.

[Law]A husband doesn't need his wife's permission to do another one.[/Law]

Now, whether or not this is an appropriate, sensible, nice, good, sane, et cetera, et cetera thing to do - that's a different matter.

Edited by Marbles, 09 July 2012 - 02:15 PM.

[hfh]

AA

Well, yes it is in favour of men. It's probably a rule that will be exploited by a husband who isn't being honest with himself or his wife...So, ultimately, it's an act of deceit which can only destroy all the time and effort it took to build the trust in a relationship...Anyhow, whatever the rules, humans absolutely love to bend them to their maximum advantage...Also, if such a man were to conduct a temp marriage without informing his wife, there must surely be other things in his life he is hiding from her....So, it's better for the man to just to be honest with his wife and tell her that he would like to embark on other relationships though I'm sure her indoors won't be pleased in the least...Upshot of rambling: man must do some serious soul searching if he is truly bothered about his journey for spiritual betterment...etc...

[alimohamad40]

Do you need your wife's permission to go to the bathroom and what if she didn't grant you?

Is it your wife or your lord ?

And why would she stick her nose in a relationship between you and another female where she is nOt a party to it? And instead of helping you And facilitating for you to marry and get closer to god and follow the sunnah of the masoomeen she actually rejects it? Why would that be the case unless she had serious problems?

Why should a third party dictate over Others and prohibit the lawful?
Prohibiting the lawful is regarded kufr according to imam ali in nahjulbalagha .

Is it your body and your needs and wants plus the second wife's or is it the first wife's ?

Just be logical how is that favoring men? That's just giving them Thier natural right so we don't end up with adultery like the famous monogomous role models bill Clinton and prince Charles and the rest.

If there is a fear of potential sin the second marriage becomes wajib so how would god give the authority to another human beings from disabling what's wajib?

Isn't the famous fish law stating
No obedience for the created in disobeying the creator
So how would god allow the wife to he obeyed in disobeying him?

As for deciet and lies and hypocrisy Islam prOhibits that. So if you do behind her back you can't lie about it. You can either tell her that it's not her buisess or announce it. You have no excuse to be a canard from humans resulting in disobeying god as that's a form of shirk where you following your wife's rules and not gods.

Announcing marriage is ideal as Islam makes it mustahab to announce marriage to promote it

If the wife is a Muslim she wouldn't take offense from legitimate behavior and would not transgress upon the god given rights of her husband and his otherwife. If she is a transgressor then her transgressing feelings should not be encouraged nor respected.

If She is rejecting it would be out of jealousy because no sane person would reject a good thing where another person is added to Thier family making Thier family bigger and more bonds and more support and more happiness for everyone bringing them closer to god and avoiding the risks of adultery and perversion  that your monogamist role models constantly face. Who in Thier right mind would reject such project?

If her reasons are jealousy which is in almost every case then imam ali said in nahjulbalagha  the jealousy of the female kind is kufr and the jealousy of the male kind is emaan .
So it's offensive for you to respect kufr as kufr is something to be rejected

And this law does not favor men as you claim because the man is naturally polygynist and the woman is naturally monogamist so Allah allowed and encouraged polygyny yet he prohibited polyandry. Allahs system is fair but the false enforced monogamy is harmful to both genders and all the evidence are pointing to this direction
We as Muslims don't have monogamist role models . All our madwomen  role models are polygynist. So who are your role models? And who is the role model of the wife that rejects polygyny and prohibits the lawful?

Edited by alimohamad40, 09 July 2012 - 05:07 PM.

[ImAli]

Quote

If She is rejecting it would be out of jealousy because no sane person would reject a good thing where another person is added to Thier family making Thier family bigger and more bonds and more support and more happiness for everyone bringing them closer to god

It's all rainbows and ponies

Edited by ImAli, 09 July 2012 - 05:10 PM.

[Haji 2003]

I gave a reason here, together with some advice, this time in bold:

Quote

There's been enough very recent heated discussion, between the same participants, about topics similar to the one that I locked. Indeed its presence did seem to be baiting others. ImAli made a perfectly sensible observation that was obvious to any reasonable person.

Looking over the OPs posting history there does seem to be a persistent and recurring interest in matters related to mutah. I would recommend that if this does play an important role in the OPs personal life, rather than their imagination, they take up the whole battery of issues with a cleric.

http://www.shiachat....y-is-worthless/

Thread locked (again). If you repeat this I'll suspend you.

Edited by Haji 2003, 09 July 2012 - 05:17 PM.

[Abu Hadi]

I'm not going to get into this again. I just have one small request. Br. alimohammad40, when you use the name of God, could you please type it in capital letters. the word 'god' with a lower case 'g' means something completely different. Please, either use Allah(s.w.a) (which is the preferred term) or use 'God' with a capital 'G' which is the proper name. Thanks, Salam.

Br. Al Munthadar, there was a good reason why your topic was closed twice. Please don't try to open it a third time.
If you want to know the reason, you can pm me. Salam.

To Sis, ImAli, I like that artwork on your post, where did you get it from ? You can reply in another thread since this one will probably stay locked.

Edited by Abu Hadi, 09 July 2012 - 05:27 PM.