46 replies to this topic

[awaiting_for_the.12th]

Zahratul_Islam, on 26 June 2012 - 10:21 PM, said:

You sound  super insecure like a real charmer.

Pray tell, do you rely on their word/your guesstimation or do you weigh them (using the plural "them" because I assume from your narrow specifications that you can afford to be picky) before proposing?

If it is a weigh in, I highly recommend you let the girl know a day prior that she should avoid all sodium intake lest you mistake water weight for an actual figure.

I think you had it right the first time about being insecure. I take the weighing machine, put it down, calibrate it to nearest tenth of gram. Ask the wali (got to keep it halal you know) to ask the lady to get on machine without shoes, purse. Take the weight and minus 3 lbs for the weight of clothes. Take it 3 times and average it out. Anything over 120lbs and i take my machine and leave. This marriage aint happening.
FYI, 120lbs is not anorexic (5'5 - 5'7"). I think its perfect weight before marriage because after that its downhill

[awaiting_for_the.12th]

Zahratul_Islam, on 26 June 2012 - 10:43 PM, said:

I actually agree that this is the perfect height/weight for a female

See i am not the only "insecure" one then.

[Propaganda_of_the_Deed]

A woman without curves is like jeans without pockets -  you just don't know where to put your hands!

Edited by Propaganda_of_the_Deed, 27 June 2012 - 02:47 AM.

[Khadim uz Zahra]

Ali Musaaa , on 26 June 2012 - 10:00 PM, said:

This may sound like a dumb question, but I have heard that when you are looking to get married (as in the case above) you are allowed to see the girl you are interested in, without her hijab in 'non Islamic clothes' in this case, t-shirt and jeans. I thought its not permitted for a Muslim woman to take off her hijab infront of men who are not part of her family?

I am not even a year old (of being a Muslim ) so I don't much about this subject nor have I taken time to study this area so forgive me for asking.

The ruling is that the boy is allowed to see her once without hijab but it should not be with lust and it's only once!

[Marbles]

Can we revert to the topic of the thread instead of talking about the physical correctness of the girls you deprived SC boys would like to marry, eh?

Yeah we can.

So,

Sad: Aye.
Sorry: Aye.
Horrible: Depends on her demeanor.
Responsible: Nay.


The tent maker of Neshapur is reported to have said through reliable chain of narrators:

Ah, love! could thou and I with fate conspire
To grasp this sorry scheme of things entire!
Would not we shatter it to bits - and then
Re-mould it nearer to the heart's desire!

And this time, for once, it feels weeaaally good to tell sisters to stay OUT OF THIS THREAD. (Yeah, don't you all always keep telling us guys to stay away from yours)

[awaiting_for_the.12th]

^ or not?

[Gotham]

Marbles, on 27 June 2012 - 10:26 AM, said:

And this time, for once, it feels weeaaally good to tell sisters to stay OUT OF THIS THREAD. (Yeah, don't you all always keep telling us guys to stay away from yours)

notice how most of the brothers disregard our requests for them to stay out. half of them start their posts with "sorry sisters for barging in" and just do whatever.

ילדת מלך, on 27 June 2012 - 09:14 AM, said:

I wonder what would be the point of it though,

I mean what difference would it make to see some one with or without his/her shawl ?----would it make any difference ? ( I am not being sarcastic, asking seriously )

i guess theyd just wanna see her hair

[Marbles]

haidernyc, on 27 June 2012 - 10:32 AM, said:

notice how most of the brothers disregard our requests for them to stay out. half of them start their posts with "sorry sisters for barging in" and just do whatever.

Yep, guilty as charged, including meself.

[Marbles]

Perhaps we need a thread with a poll to see if females in here would accept if asked by the prospective suitor to take off hijab, for once, given that guys can Islamically request this from girls for the purpose of marriage?

We also need some real life stories from married sisters. Were they as fully covered during pre-marriage meetings with their husbands as they did when going out? Or was it a bit relaxed? But I guess this question may be deemed too personal to answer.

Is someone willing to do a thread on this?

Edited by Marbles, 27 June 2012 - 10:48 AM.

[Fink]

''Yes. I would feel horrible  (7 votes [53.85%]) ''

[Aliaabbas]

Marbles, on 27 June 2012 - 10:47 AM, said:

Perhaps we need a thread with a poll to see if females in here would accept if asked by the prospective suitor to take off hijab, for once, given that guys can Islamically request this from girls for the purpose of marriage?

We also need some real life stories from married sisters. Were they as fully covered during pre-marriage meetings with their husbands as they did when going out? Or was it a bit relaxed? But I guess this question may be deemed too personal to answer.

Is someone willing to do a thread on this?

Why don't you do it?

[Martyrdom]

if  basically telling someone I can't marry you according to my absolute calculations you will  become fat in two years won't make someone feel bad I don't know what will.

[awaiting_for_the.12th]

Martyrdom, on 27 June 2012 - 06:05 PM, said:

if  basically telling someone I can't marry you according to my absolute calculations you will  become fat in two years won't make someone feel bad I don't know what will.

Telling them that you can find a better wife? I think that should be the nail in the coffin

[Martyrdom]

awaiting_for_the.12th, on 27 June 2012 - 06:14 PM, said:

Telling them that you can find a better wife? I think that should be the nail in the coffin

Yeah I guess but I think even telling her why is even worse because she knows its either her hair or her body that was the problem. At the same time that's what she get for taking of her hijab for non mahram men . I know sunnies do this never knew shias do it to .

[awaiting_for_the.12th]

i was kidding about all the weight stuff btw. I hope no one took me serious on that.

[Khadim uz Zahra]

awaiting_for_the.12th, on 27 June 2012 - 07:04 PM, said:

i was kidding about all the weight stuff btw. I hope no one took me serious on that.

Obviously no one did!

[SatanicToast]

I'd feel somewhat guilty, but then again it varies.

If she's willing to lose the weight, I'll gladly marry. If I have to deal with someone who fails to take care of themselves then forget about it. I have enough people like that in my life and I wouldn't want to be living under a roof with one for the rest of my life.

[AlAbd AlThaleel]

I'd feel more pity and sympathy then guilt, per se. I'd also feel like a superficial jerk if that was the sole purpose for rejection.

[covertiman]

Your reason wasn't sufficient for breaking up the relationship, however, in this case it may have been God sent as it seems this girl didn't have a strong faithful foundation.

[covertiman]

Zahratul_Islam, on 28 June 2012 - 08:43 AM, said:

Hm, did she behave lewdly because she had no husband or did she have no husband because she would have behaved lewdly.

I hate causality

Either way, there's no excuse for such behavior.