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Sisters-Choose The God-Fearing Man

Miss Wonderful

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The most satisfying spouse  is the God Fearing Man. He is the one you should look for and he most likely wont be online-he's too busy making a difference in the world.

You will never be bored with him. The way he is devoted to Allah SWT will fill you up with admiration and respect. His humor will be wholesome and sweet. His shyness and the way he lowers his gaze will make you fall madly in love with him. He will be  truthful. He will be pleased to meet your mother and greet her in the most polite manner as if he were her own son. He might not be a 10, but how he takes care of his body, and the Noor given to him from Allah SWT will be enough to attract you for a life time making him an 11 in your book. 

He will never put you down. His language will be pure and sweet. You will feel safe and beautiful with him, and he will inspire you to fulfill your Islamic duties as a wife to the best of your abilities



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6 hours ago, IbnSina said:

Also, if he does not try to manipulate your feelings by flirting with you on the first talk because he respects you more than you respect yourself, that does not mean his autistic but that you need to stop watching hollywood junk.

Absolutely- he might not  know how to string sugary words that all girls want to hear- but even his shy silence or few genuine words  that he says will be the most beautiful that you will always cherish cuz they will be genuine and fill your heart up. You will overlook his race as well. He will  be more beautiful than any false hollywood portrayal.  

Edited by Miss Wonderful

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36 minutes ago, enigma313 said:

Are you serious? Do you think men like this actually exist? You live in a fantasy world....just saying.

yes Alhamduillah they do exist and that is the reality.

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44 minutes ago, enigma313 said:

Are you serious? Do you think men like this actually exist? You live in a fantasy world....just saying.

I think that you should replace 'men' with 'people' and join the club. There are good people out there but the annoying ones are a black mark on the white paper so we ignore the white and focus on the bad. I think it's important to change that impulse of disappointment at mankind and focus on the more important things in life

At the end of the day, it's unlikely we are going to find many people who are are great and God-fearing... as somebody who has been guilty of this before, I don't think it's worth (talking from experience!) paying attention to people whose actions stink really bad although they like to appear great.

 

 

Edited by silasun

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full disclosure: I am an unmarried male. this doesn't mean that I am trying to use this blog as a way for me to hook up with any sisters. but I think i need to give you some advice from the brothers side. 

"god fearing" men are as rare as unicorns. what is there in you, that would make such a man desire to marry you? you are pretty? so what. the world is full of pretty girls. you are a virgin? so what, the world is full of virgins. you are religious? so what, the world is full of religious girls. 

instead, look for a man who is "good fearing ENOUGH". think what are deal breakers when it comes to marriage, and what things you can be flexible/ compromise on. also look at a mans lifestyle. often a man might live a decent, moral life while not fully practising his religion. can such a man be encouraged to fulfil his obligations? if so, he should be considered. often the mullah-types are the ones with the dirtiest secrets. 

do not ever trust anything any man ever says or does in front of you. men will lie about EVERYTHING to get you. 

find out what you can independently. facebook, linkedin etc. 

find a guy who you can be comfortable with enough that you can fart around him and a guy who can make you laugh and a guy who can talk to you on a level so deep you can pass hours in conversation and not realise the time has passed. 

basically, what I am saying is, prince charming doesnt exist. your knight in shining armour doesnt exist. dont look for a bonfire, look for a spark where you can build a bonfire together 

 

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I would personally never advise any sister to marry any man or any man to marry any sister who does not at least fulfill his or her religious obligations (wajibats) unless of course wajibats are not important to the person in question in which case I would advise the person to first fulfill their religious obligations and then search for marriage. 

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@DigitalUmmah If a woman desires a religious man, this already says a lot about her. Look around you and see what women nowadays fall for, 'bad boy' type personas because 'oh they're so cool and religious ones are so backwards.' Btw, religious doesn't necessarily mean growing a beard to the knees or spending day and night in the mosque, religion is akhlaaq first before anything else. 

Edited by Pearl178

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2 minutes ago, Pearl178 said:

@DigitalUmmah If a woman desires a religious man, this already says a lot about her. Look around you and see what women nowadays fall for, 'bad boy' type personas because 'oh they're so cool and religious ones are so backwards.' Btw, religious doesn't necessarily mean growing a beard to the knees or spending day and night in the mosque, religion is akhlaaq first before anything else. 

I'm not bragging about how much of a bad boy I am....but one time, I pulled the USB stick out of my PC without it being safe for it to eject. 

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Let me be straight to all of you sisters. God fearing man..... I fear Allah but it doesn't mean i am an angel... I am a human being i have desires and needs I try my best to avoid haram things but hey i am a man and I am not perfect. I have committed many sins in my life but as long as i am aware of those sins and I ask my Lord (Allah) to forgive me... i think i am a good person. 

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10 minutes ago, Ali_ul_azeem said:

Let me be straight to all of you sisters. God fearing man..... I fear Allah but it doesn't mean i am an angel... 

Psssh ! 

Your proclamtion doesn't count since you are off the market. :coffee:

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26 minutes ago, starlight said:

Can anyone explain to me what are the chatacteristics that an individual must possess in order to be categoriezed as a god fearing man ? 

one who treats those who can not benefit him in any way with the same respect he would give to those who could give him a million pounds

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5 hours ago, starlight said:

Can anyone explain to me what are the chatacteristics that an individual must possess in order to be categoriezed as a god fearing man ? 

An  individual who doesn't manipulate others or steps over them to get what they want: for instance pledging false promises. Someone who  genuinely does the  Islamic requirement such as salah and fasting. A person who  wont drink or do drugs and abstains from using bad language as best as they can. Etc..

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Does wishing to change and  be God-fearing count, where does that stand exactly. 

10 hours ago, DigitalUmmah said:

I'm not bragging about how much of a bad boy I am....but one time, I pulled the USB stick out of my PC without it being safe for it to eject. 

So did I, big whoop.

 

On Sunday, November 13, 2016 at 4:50 PM, Miss Wonderful said:

yes Alhamduillah they do exist and that is the reality.

Yes, they exist but they are  few and far between, your best option is to take a man who is willing to be the man you want and work with what you get.

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3 hours ago, Gaius I. Caesar said:

Does wishing to change and  be God-fearing count, where does that stand exactly. 

The criterion in spouse selection is willingness to submit to the commands of God. It does not make sense for a person to want to become a pious person but at the same time not put effort in to act on their religious duties - staying away from the sins and doing the obligations.

Of course, that doesn't mean that you reject anybody who makes errors from time to time - sometimes the going gets tough and you slip and sometimes there is a genuine misunderstanding about the actual Islamic law, so a person ends up breaking it unintentionally. However, there should be that willingness to submit to God present within the spouse.

It is interesting that the hadiths tell us to look for religion and akhlaq - akhlaq is something which actually firmly has a role in Shariah (a person may not swear, backbite or lie, but any action, even if it is halal in and of itself like pointing a person's fault out in their own face, which hurts your spouse is absolutely haram unless there is some overriding reason) but sadly, people think that they are the "most religious person in the world" now that they have the beard, pray on time and give their khums and zakat - fearing God is a lot more than making sure your income is halal and that you pray, fast and do hajj - fearing God means you do the right thing no matter if it is in your favour or against you.

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41 minutes ago, silasun said:

The criterion in spouse selection is willingness to submit to the commands of God. It does not make sense for a person to want to become a pious person but at the same time not put effort in to act on their religious duties - staying away from the sins and doing the obligations.

Of course, that doesn't mean that you reject anybody who makes errors from time to time - sometimes the going gets tough and you slip and sometimes there is a genuine misunderstanding about the actual Islamic law, so a person ends up breaking it unintentionally. However, there should be that willingness to submit to God present within the spouse.

It is interesting that the hadiths tell us to look for religion and akhlaq - akhlaq is something which actually firmly has a role in Shariah (a person may not swear, backbite or lie, but any action, even if it is halal in and of itself like pointing a person's fault out in their own face, which hurts your spouse is absolutely haram unless there is some overriding reason) but sadly, people think that they are the "most religious person in the world" now that they have the beard, pray on time and give their khums and zakat - fearing God is a lot more than making sure your income is halal and that you pray, fast and do hajj - fearing God means you do the right thing no matter if it is in your favour or against you.

+10000

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Salam 

Woooooo 

Ppll here posts many sensible thinks

Well ohk I wanto say to something

I too like god fearing men 

Who offer prayers punctually

Do obligatory duties and allllllllllll and all

But mymy simple criteria was a man should begod fearing, giid natured,descent, mature, responsible ,who Respect's woman's who believes in my ri8s 

Its ohk that a man is not perfect 

Like we can't get all sort of fovourite ice creams in one small box

But somewhere the fact remains the  same .

Men pretend 

They always hide their reality behind a good covering of frrorocher 

U will only know his reality when u r his property when u start living with him legally wrna to he will be ur dream boy and maintain an image which u like 

 

Still i feel the spouse should be someone with whom u can be urself and most importantly he let's u be urself  and not change u accrdng to his desires (except Islamic duties ) -1 if all must be good natured and Islamic I mean godfearing later all errors I guess are ohk

Look ppl are diplomatic Hippocratic but however diplomatic he might be he should respect u and don't use his ddiplomacy on u 

We r Hippocratic but with someone we really don't need to be Hippocratic with or we can just be what we r

WhoWho is helpful in ibadah 

Who is trustworthy

 

 

And once when u are uncomfortable with certain things that particular chp must shut it there

Some men even try to make u comfortable with things theythey r cmfrtable in in spite of knowing girls condition feelings and even the thought's behind such things

Honestly there are many more things 

But I know it sounds melodramatic or kndof a dialogue of some actor or actress

Truly I don't believe in men 

But still if someone gets such company go ahead 

No body is perfect but imperfections has its own perfect form I feel

Anyway all the best 

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      A Khattabi?
      What can be asserted without doubt is that the historical Mufadhal was at one point in time connected to Abu al-Khattab and the Khatabiyya [there is even a splinter-sect of the Khatabiyya which was named after Mufadhal i.e. the Mufadhaliyya]. They are accused of deifying al-Sadiq in some way and of believing in continuation of prophecy. We have some narrations which indicate Mufadhal’s links with such beliefs:   
      حدثني الحسين بن الحسن بن بندار القمي، قال حدثني سعد بن عبد الله بن أبي خلف القمي، قال حدثني محمد بن الحسين بن أبي الخطاب و الحسن بن موسى، عن صفوان بن يحيى، عن عبد الله بن مسكان قال: دخل حجر بن زائدة و عامر بن جذاعة الأزدي على أبي عبد الله عليه السلام فقالا: جعلنا فداك، إن المفضل بن عمر يقول إنكم تقدرون أرزاق العباد ...
      al-Husayn b. al-Hasan b. Bundar al-Qummi – Sa’d b. Abdallah b. Abi Khalaf al-Qummi – Muhammad b. al-Husayn b. Abi al-Khattab and al-Hasan b. Musa from Safwan b. Yahya from Abdallah b. Muskan who said: Hujr b. Zaida and A’mir b. Judha’a al-Azdi entered upon Abi Abdillah عليه السلام and said to him: May we be made your ransom, Mufadhal b. Umar says that you are the ones who allot the Rizq of the slaves …
      علي بن محمد، عن صالح بن أبي حماد، عن محمد بن أورمة، عن ابن سنان، عن المفضل بن عمر قال: كنت أنا والقاسم شريكي ونجم بن حطيم وصالح بن سهل بالمدينة فتناظرنا في الربوبية، قال: فقال بعضنا لبعض: ما تصنعون بهذا نحن بالقرب منه وليس منا في تقية قوموا بنا إليه، قال: فقمنا فوالله ما بلغنا الباب إلا وقد خرج علينا بلا حذاء ولا رداء قد قام كل شعرة من رأسه منه وهو يقول: لا لا يا مفضل ويا قاسم ويا نجم، لا لا بل عباد مكرمون لا يسبقونه بالقول وهم بأمره يعملون
      Ali b. Muhammad – Salih b. Abi Hammad – Muhammad b. Awrama – Ibn Sinan – al-Mufadhal b. Umar who said:  I, al-Qasim al-Shariki, Najm b. Hutaym and Salih b. Sahl were in Madina when we disputed each other over the divinity [of the ‘Aimma]. He [Mufadhal] said: We said to each other - why are we speculating on this when we are nearby to him [the Imam] and he is not in Taqiyya with us [does not answer us in dissimulation], let’s go meet him. He [Mufadhal] said: We headed towards him - by Allah we had not reached the door before he came out bare-footed, without a cloak and all the hair on his head stood on end [in apprehension] saying: No - O Mufadhal, Qasim and Najm, No! “rather mere honored slaves, never preceding Him (Allah) in word, and they always follow His orders” (21:26-27)
      حدثني حمدويه وإبراهيم ابنا نصير، قالا: حدثنا محمد بن عيسى، عن علي ابن الحكم، عن المفضل بن عمر أنه كان يبشر أبا الخطاب وفلان أنكما لمن المرسلين
      Hamduwayh b. Nusayr and Ibrahim b. Nusayr – Muhammad b. Isa – Ali b. al-Hakam: That he [Mufadhal b. Umar] used to give glad tidings to Aba al-Khattab and one other saying: ‘verily you are messengers’
      قال الكشى: وذكرت الطيارة الغالية في بعض كتبها عن المفضل: أنه قال لقد قتل مع أبي اسماعيل يعني أبا الخطاب سبعون نبيا ... وأن المفضل قال: أدخلنا على أبي عبد الله عليه‌ السلام ونحن اثنى عشر رجلا، قال: فجعل أبو عبد الله عليه‌ السلام يسلم على رجل رجل منا ويسمي كل رجل منا باسم نبي، وقال لبعضنا: السلام عليك يا نوح، وقال لبعضنا: السلام عليك يا ابراهيم، وكان آخر من سلم عليه وقال: السلام عليك يا يونس، ثم قال: لا تخاير بين الانبياء
      al-Kashshi said: The Tayyara Ghulat say in one of their books that al-Mufadhal said: Seventy prophets were killed with Aba al-Khattab … Mufadhal is also supposed to have said: Twelve of us entered in to see Abi Abdillah عليه‌ السلام. He [the Imam] began greeting each one of us individually and calling each one of us by the name of a prophet, saying to one of us ‘peace be upon you O Noah’ to another ‘peace be upon you O Ibrahim’, he greeted the last one of us saying: ‘peace be upon you O Yunus’. Then he [the Imam] said: do not distinguish between the prophets! 
       
      Mufadhal, The Khattabiyya and Ismail
      The Khatabbiya seem to have taken Ismail the son of al-Sadiq as their figure-head and pinned their hopes on him as the next Imam. It is hard to discern from the meager sources available whether Ismail’s participation in this was of his own volition or not.
      رجال الكشي: حمدويه بن نصير، عن يعقوب بن يزيد، عن ابن أبي عمير، عن هشام بن الحكم وحماد بن عثمان، عن إسماعيل بن جابر قال: قال أبو عبد الله: ايت المفضل قل له: يا كافر يا مشرك ما تريد إلى ابني تريد أن تقتله
      Hamduwayh b. Nusayr – Ya’qub b. Yazid – Ibn Abi Umayr – Hisham b. al-Hakam and Hammad b. Uthman –  Ismail b. Jabir who said: Abu Abdillah عليه السلام said: Go to Mufadhal and say to him - O Kafir, O Mushrik, what do you want for my son Ismail? Do you want to kill him!?
      The narration above has the Imam using very harsh language with Mufadhal in the context of the latter’s ‘grooming’ of Ismail which al-Sadiq felt was dangerous. 
      On the other hand, there also exists a countervailing narration as below:

      الكافي: محمد بن يحيى، عن أحمد بن محمد بن عيسى، عن علي بن الحكم، عن يونس بن يعقوب قال: أمرني أبو عبد الله عليه السلام أن آتي المفضل واعزيه باسماعيل وقال: اقرأ المفضل السلام وقل له: إنا قد اصبنا بإسماعيل فصبرنا، فاصبر كما صبرنا، إنا أردنا أمرا وأراد الله عزوجل أمرا، فسلمنا لامر الله عزوجل
      Muhammad b. Yahya – Ahmad b. Muhammad b. Isa – Ali b. al-Hakam – Yunus b. Ya’qub who said: Abu Abdillah عليه السلام ordered me to go to Mufadhal and condole him for [the death of] Ismail. He [the Imam] said: Convey my greetings of peace to Mufadhal and say to him: We have been tried through Ismail and have remained patient, so be patient the way we have been patient. We wanted something but Allah Mighty and Majestic wanted something else so we have submitted to the command of Allah Mighty and Majestic.   
      This one is much more warm. The Imam condoles Mufadhal on the occasion of Ismail’s death - the two must have been especially close - and commends him to be patient in emulation of the Imam’s own patience.   
      How can we explain this difference in tone?
       
      A Rapprochement?
      It seems that one way to reconcile between them is to posit that Mufadhal had a period of estrangement from the Imam - because of his involvement with the Khattabis and their intentions for Ismail, however, he later repented from this and broke away with Abu al-Khattab, consequently the relation with the Imam improved.
      Evidence for this can be found in the narration below:
      جبرئيل بن أحمد قال: حدّثني محمّد بن عيسى، عن يونس، عن حماد بن عثمان قال: سمعت أبا عبداللّه عليه السلام يقول للمفضّل بن عمر الجعفي: يا كافر يا مشرك ما لك ولابني، يعني إسماعيل بن جعفر، وكان منقطعا إليه، يقول فيه مع الخطابية، ثم رجع بعد
      Jibrail b. Ahmad – Muhammad b. Isa – Yunus – Hammad b. Uthman who said: I heard Aba Abdillah عليه السلام saying to al-Mufadhal b. Umar al-Ju’fi: O Kafir, O Mushrik, what do you have to do with my son - meaning Ismail b. Ja’far? - and he [Mufadhal] was loyal to him [Ismail], believing about him [that he is the Imam and much more] together with the Khatabiyya, then he returned afterwards.
      That Mufadhal returned back to the truth after deviation can be proved also by the fact that he was not among those followers of Abu al-Khattab who died with their leader when they were attacked by the men of Isa b. Musa [the Abbasid governor of Kufa] after barricading themselves in the central mosque as part of an aborted revolt.
      Another piece of evidence for this view is that Mufadhal seems to have a more cordial relation with al-Kadhim after the death of al-Sadiq [indeed there are no censures against him quoted from this Imam, which would tally with his reform in his later years]. 
      محمد بن مسعود، قال: حدثني عبد الله بن خلف، قال: حدثنا علي بن حسان الواسطي، قال: حدثني موسى بن بكير قال: سمعت أبا الحسن يقول لما أتاه موت المفضل بن عمر، قال: رحمه الله، كان الوالد بعد الوالد، أما انه قد استراح
      Muhammad b. Masud – Abdallah b. Khalaf – Ali b. Hassan al-Wasiti – Musa b. Bukayr who said: I heard Aba al-Hasan saying when he was informed of the death of al-Mufadhal b. Umar - May Allah have mercy on him, he was a father after the father [al-Sadiq i.e. a second father to him]. Verily he is now resting in peace.
       
      Summary 
      The case of al-Mufadhal is a complicated one. More needs to be done to collect all the relevant evidence and formulate a coherent position, if at all possible. This is obviously not the place for an in-depth study. Such research should also consider the provenance of famous books attributed to him like Tawhid al-Mufadhal, al-Ihlilaja etc. Having said all this, caution must be exercised as regards narrations attributed to him, specifically if the contents have to do with Imamology.
    • By shadow_of_light in From Earth to Heaven
         0
      St. 12 part 4

      By the high sky where there are glorious huge palaces;
      By the promised day when the creatures will meet the Creator;
      By night traveller, that shiny star whose glaring light cleaves the dark.
      By all of these that there is a protector, assigned by God, for every soul.

      قسم به آسمان بلندی که دارای کاخهای عظیم و با شکوه است.
      قسم به روز موعود، به روز دیدار که وعده گاه خلایق است.
      قسم به مسافر شب، به آن ستاره درخشانی که نور خیره کننده اش تاریکیها را میشکافد
      قسم به همه اینان که هر شخصی را از طرف خداوند مراقب و نگهبانی است

      Finally, the promised day came.
      Hoopoe again came and sat behind the window. This time, it held a leaf of ziziphus in its beak.

      After some hours, I noticed it and opened the window. Hoopoe entered and sat on the table. I patted it and said: What a beautiful bird!
      Then I went to bring food and water for it.
      But hoopoe didnt eat or drink anything.
      I touched the statue and it started singing. I thought hoopoe would like the song but it didnt.

      Instead, it put the leaf on the table and looked at me expecting me to remember something.
      I said: Maybe you need some leaves! There are many trees is my garden. You can use their leaves as much as you wish
      Hoopoe's eyes filled with tears for it realized that I didnt remember it and ziziphus tree.
      For a few moments, it remained silent. Then it flew toward the window and left the house.
      I stood by the window and watched hoopoe flying in the sky.
      Hoopoe flew high and high.
      I said: I wish I could fly like it.
      Suddenly I remembered that once I had 2 wings which I lost after my fall on the earth; I remembered the seventh heaven, the angels, God, banishment from paradise and my rendezvous.
      There was not much time... I left that mansion quickly.

      But when I reached there, it was late.
      The sun had already set. I had lost the best opportunity in my life.
      I sat under ziziphus tree and cried. Hoopoe came. I patted it and said:
      You, kind bird, you tried your best. Alas! I remembered too late!
      Gabriel appeared and said:....
      ....
      ...
      .....

      Whether you are close to the sun or far from it, its light and warmth dont change. But the closer you are to the sun, the more you benefit from its warmth...
      God is source of mercy and compassion; How much you benefit from his mercy depends on how close you are to him.
      The path which Satan and his friends follow, leads to the darkness. The more they proceed, the darker the path will get. And finally they reach total darkness. They will go astray so much that even if they want to return, it will be very difficult for them.
      You are free to choose your path. A path leads to light, to magnificence and grandeur. And a path leads to disgrace, aberrance and regret. You can choose: ascending to A'laa Eleein or descending to Asfal al-Saffelin!*

      Gabriel was about to leave. But before he did, he turned his face to me and said: Angels told me that they missed Human a lot. They are still awaiting you. What about you, Human? Do you still remember them?!
      ...
      ....
      ...

      The stars were shining in the dark sky. And it meant that there was still hope. Because the stars are torches of the angels who had been waiting in the heavens for many centuries to welcome those who travelling to paradise.
       
      * A'laa Eleein: the uppermost place in the heavens اعلی علیین
      Asfal al-Safelin: the lowermost place in the hell اسفل السافلین
       
       
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